Title: I Never Got to Say Goodbye

Author: Ali

E-mail: Insanechica14@aol.com

Rating: PG

Spoilers: "The Gift"

Distribution: E-mail me if you want it...don't know why you would....

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this, and if you try to sue me, you will get like, 5 cents. Also, Joss Whedon owns it, or the WB does, or UPN does.

Summary: Buffy's POV as she saves the world.

A/N: I keep seeing Buffy run & jump into the portal to save everyone. I understand why the First slayer said "Death is your gift." If you don't know what it means, then, hey, it will be explained. I am in denial badly!!!!! Also, some of the quotes I don't remember exactly, so I tried the best I could to repeat it.

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I knew that it was me or Dawn. "Dawnie..." I said. As I told her everything I wanted her to know, thoughts were racing through my mind.

"It's always the blood." Spike had said not 2 hours before. "Blood brings life. It is life." he had said along with it.

At the moment, I didn't fully understand. I understood that if there wasn't blood in the portal, then the portal wouldn't open. I understood that we had to save my sister. I don't think I understood everything else.

When I reached the top of the tower, I knew I had to save her. I pushed that idiot out of the way. Too bad he fell to his death. Just another person the next slayer wouldn't have to kill. As I had killed Glory, I just did it for Dawn. I untied her and brought her from the edge. I turned around and watched the portal open.

Flashback

"Death is your gift."

"Death is-" I asked.

"Death is your gift."

End of Flashback

Dawn wanted to jump into the portal, and save the world.

'Death is my gift.' I thought. It then sunk into my brain. My gift was death. If I kept Dawn from jumping, and jumped myself, I would kill myself, but I would save Dawn and the world. I would be giving everyone in the universe the chance to live. I would be a hero for doing this.

"Tell Giles I figured it out." I said. I finished telling Dawn what I wanted to. 'What about Angel?' I kept thinking. When I was talking to Giles earlier that day, I said I had loved Angel. But I still love him, so why did I use past tense?

"Buffy..." Dawn said.

I turned and ran. I said I had loved him because I knew that the world was ending. I couldn't stop the inevitable. Somehow, before all this happened, I knew about the future.

"Bufy!" I heard Dawn call.

I jumped off the platform. I felt myself flying through the air. I felt calm, peaceful, even though I knew that what I was doing would kill me. After all, I was *just* a girl. as I hit the protal, I knew that everyone had seen me. I felt everything in my soul leave my body. I knew, heard, and felt everything around me. As the portal closed, if it ever hurt me, it didn't hurt anymore. I felt the life leave my body. My soul stayed in mid-air and watched as my body landed on the ground. My soul watched as Xander held Anya in his arms, as Willow and Tara held each other, as Giles mourned the slayer I had been, and as Spike wept for me. I know he loved me, I just didn't know how much. I watched as Dawn walked towards my friends, and I watched as all of them mourned me.

"I never got to say good-bye." I whispered. "And neither did they."