A/N: This story is a continuation of the events of my other story "Til the Pain Fades." If you haven't read that one yet, please, go on ahead and take a gander at it, because it will only make this story better. 3.
It had only been about a month since Will Solace lost the light of his world. About a month since the darkness took away all that was precious to him, and turned his whole world upside down.
It had all happened so fast that Will's memories of that fateful day, that had ripped his light from him with blood and shadow, were blurry.
One of the few things that Will knew with vivid detail, however, was the simple fact that none of the memories swimming around in his head, threatening to overwhelm him with nightmares each time he closed his eyes to sleep, were good.
Will brought his arms to his chest, snuggling with himself against the cold, crisp air of autumn. He hadn't been built for this weather. His father was Apollo, after all. Simply put, inherently, he loved the summer most of all. Nevertheless, he couldn't control the weather, and simply rubbing his arms could not cut it against the biting chill of the autumn.
Tears streamed, unbidden, down the sides of Will's face. Memories surged to the surface of his mind.
Will remembered that the only warning he had gotten before his life changed for the worse was the a strangled scream from his beloved Nico di Angelo. His Angel. Wheelchair-bound yet still fierce on the battlefield with his legion of skeletons cutting down skeletons every which way.
Will remembered, rather fuzzily, the way that he had spun around to face Nico. His blade had flashed through the air to turn a monster to dust as his eyes settled on his beloved.
Will remembered, with exquisite clarity the single, terrible moment that had come before everything changed forever. Nico had reached out to him, eyes filled with the kind of fear that Nico had never known they could have. Even in the face of Python, Nico had been unwavering and stoic. Not in this case.
Will remembered, a pain twisting in his chest, that time had seemed to slow down as he watched what happened before him. Nico's fingers were splayed, as though he was trying his best to reach Will, but to no avail. A dreadful creature reared up, wicked curved blade ready to strike a fatal blow.
The only thing that Will remembered immediately after that was not an image, but a terrifying and frankly, sickening scream of pure pain and agony.
Will didn't know whose throat the horrible sound had been ripped from. All he knew was that the scream had actually happened, and that it still echoed even when there was no one around him. Even when only the silence and the shadows kept him company.
Will remembered that after, he had seen red. Only red. Crimson like the blood that had watered the grass of Half-Blood Hill as a result of the battle that should never have happened. The battle that had required every able citizen, and in Nico's case, even disabled citizen, of Theopolis to come to the defence of the camp.
Will remembered that a dark haze had descended over his eyes as the monters all around him screamed and scattered. Their guttural roars had been like the most horrifying choir he had ever heard. They had turned to dust before they managed to get very far.
Will couldn't remember whether the beasts had died by his hand or someone else's. All he knew was that they had died. Painfully. Will could remember the sheer carnage. The bloodbath that had ensued around him.
Will remembered the pain. The sharp and unabating pain that had become a part of his world from that moment forth.
Will could not stop the gasp that slipped from his lips as the memory came to an end. He felt a comforting hand touch his thigh gently, but it wasn't enough. He shuddered where he stood because of the terrible emotions that remembering had roused in him, but he also shivered because of the cold.
Tears streamed down the sides of Will's face. They pooled at his chin before falling, only to splash against his cold toes, clad only in his signature flip-flops. There were some days when he could, like before, find humour in the way that unlike everything else in his life, his flip-flop wearing was the one thing that had remained unchanged.
Some days, Will found it easier to maintain the will to live because he could laugh at the ridiculous notion that of all the things he could find comfort in, he found it in his flip-flops and the way that they bared his feet to the elements. The way that they made his toes numb in the chill air of autumn.
Will knew that people didn't approve of his fashion choices for the fall. He was wearing flip-flops when it was cold, after all. They had every right to not approve. He recognized that. It was a fact that Will often admitted to himself.
Still, what those people didn't know was the fact that the flip-flops were a reminder of how great life had been before. They were a summer thing, yes, but some of the best memories of his life had been during the summer. The flip-flops were a constant reminder of that, a pillar of stability that Will needed so much in this desperate and truly dark time.
Will squeezed his eyes shut because the tears behind them were threatening to spill out once more. They did anyway, and he was powerless to stop them from streaming down his cheeks.
Somehow, Will could fell the sun come out from behind the cloud that it had been hiding behind for much of the afternoon without having to look. Perhaps it was the fact that he was a son of Apollo that allowed him to know if the sun was shining or not, but it didn't matter, anyway.
Even as the warmth of the sunlight washed over Will's body, it was not enough to chase away the chill of the crisp autumn air. Nor did the sunlight bring him the solace that it once did. Ever since that fateful day that seemed so long ago now, the sunlight that had once given him such comfort was bleak and almost lifeless.
Will shivered. A memory bubbled up from the fog that permeated much of his mind these days. He was finding it more and more difficult to live in the real world instead of the fantastical memories that he'd built with his husband.
"Hey, Will," said Nico, walking up beside Will where he stood on the pier. He was looking out across the sand, where the light of the setting sun was playing on the waves. "What are you thinking?" said Nico, voice both playful and concerned.
Will turned to his beloved and walked up behind Nico. He hugged his fiance and propped up his chin on the top of Nico's head. He tilted his head forward and buried his nose in the unruly mop of Nico's dark hair. He hummed contentedly at the simple gesture, though two years ago he would probably have been bent over to the side, clutching his stomach because Nico had just punched him in the gut.
When their relationship had still been young and Nico hadn't been as confident as he was now, Nico's height had been a point of contention between him and Will. Now, however, Nico couldn't care less what Will did, as long as it wasn't anything excessively stupid, which sometimes, Will had a knack for.
"I was just wondering what it would be like to catch the sun as it came down to kiss the horizon," said Will, pressing his nose deeper into Nico's hair and inhaling the scent of his fiance that he had gotten so used to. The smell that sometimes he had trouble sleeping if he was left without.
"You mean what it would be like to catch the sunset?" said Nico, dryly. He craned his neck and looked up at Will. His fiance shrugged before nodding. "Well," said Nico, with a smirk; "That's a very poetic way of saying it."
Nico paled as soon as he realized what he had just said. The horror dawned on him and before Will could say anything, he clapped his hands to his ears and said "Lalalalala! Forget I said anything!" Will chuckled and shook his head. He totally hadn't been about to spout a haiku that he was well aware annoyed Nico to no end.
"Apollo kids and their poetry," grumbled Nico under his breath, only to be rewarded with a pinch to his cheek for his grumpiness. "Would you stop that!" he said, swatting Will's hand. He got a pinch to the other cheek. "William Solace!" Will was laughing uncontrollably.
Nico crossed his arms and harrumphed. "Aww," said Will; "I'm sorry, Mister Grumpy-butt."
Nico looked at his fiance and rolled his eyes. "Let's sit down, Will," he said, untangling Will's arms from around his waist. He led Will to the edge of the wharf before bending down to take off his shoes and his socks.
Nico sat down, unable to help the giggle that bubbled out of his throat at the sensation of the foam on the waves flirting playfully with the soles of his feet. It almost felt as though someone was tickling him. "I know what it's like to catch the sun at sunset," said Nico.
Nico looked meaningfully at Will, and though his face was serious, his eyes were filled with mirth. "It always feels warm. It always makes me feel loved and cared for—" Nico looked away, a blush creeping into his cheeks; "It also annoys me a lot because at sunset the sun tends to be really grumpy and hungry after a long day's work."
Nico looked back at Will, who was looking at him with wonder, that was replaced with a frown soon after. "What on earth are you talki—" Will paused. "Oh."
Will looked at the smirk that decorated Nico's lips and stuck his tongue out. "Who's being poetic now?" he grumbled under his breath. Nico started laughing, which was just what Will needed in order to pounce and tickle the living daylights out of his fiance.
"S-stop it!" gasped Nico. He was trying his best to fight Will back, but he was also trying to stem his squeals and keep his balance on the pier. His peals of laughter echoed over the water and it was a generally good time until Nico felt wet fingers wrap around his ankle. His eyes widened when all of a sudden, he was pulled into the Sound.
"W-what the fuck?!" stammered Nico, as he clambered back onto the pier. He was dripping wet, the clothes he'd worn to work completely soaked through. Nico glared down at the waves and saw a pair of sea-green eyes just hovering underneath the water's surface, as well as two rows of perfect teeth bared in a grin.
"Perseus Jackson!" said Nico, fuming; "I swear to Hades, I will kill you!" Will was so stunned that it took him a moment to process what had just happened. He looked at Nico and started laughing uncontrollably.
Will had not expected Percy to be around, though he supposed that he should not have been surprised. Everyone knew that ever since—Well, no one liked talking about what had happened. Nico glared at Will, then smirked. Before Will knew it, he was plunged into the water, too.
Will flailed for a moment, entirely disorientated by the way that Nico had pushed him into the seawater. He felt a bubble of air form around his head, then a pair of warm lips pressed against his, playful but tentative, as though they were just trying a taste.
Will opened his eyes and saw Percy who winked at him. Will only managed to gawk at Percy for a moment before the son of Poseidon vanished in a violent cloud of bubbles when Nico launched himself into the water to tackle Percy.
Nico grabbed Will by the waist and propelled both of them to the surface. Up at the surface, Nico held Will close as they both treaded the water. Nico smiled at him before all of a sudden, Nico's one arm struck out to the side and knocked Percy away. "My man," breathed Nico, looking into Will's eyes before pressing their lips together in an earnest, passionate kiss.
Will traced his lips with his fingers. They tingled with the memory of the kiss that had happened seemingly so long ago. He couldn't help but smile a little at the thought that he had been so happy back then. The smile turned into a frown as soon as he realized that he wasn't happy anymore.
Everything had been going so fine for everyone. There were the few great tragedies that happened every now and again, like what had happened to Percy, but despite that, it had been a time of unprecedented peace.
It wasn't until the quest for the Calydonian Boar was called that things had started going wrong all over again. That was the quest that Nico had returned from bound to a chair for the rest of his life, unable, even, to do some of the simplest things he'd taken for granted before like walking.
It had been difficult, dealing with Nico's disability, but they had managed. As a couple, Will and Nico had come out of the ordeal a stronger couple.
Things had only just been starting to settle down for Will, who was now thirty-five, until again something happened that turned his whole world upside-down. Worse than that. The misfortune had completely destroyed the tenuous peace he'd struck with the demigod life, and it had turned his whole world dark.
Will had already come so close to losing Nico that he had never wanted to be put in that kind of situation again, but the Fates were cruel, and they had conspired against him.
Now, Will had lost Nico in a more profound way than he could have ever imagined, even knowing that he was a demigod. The darkness that his personal tragedy had caused hung about him like a second skin. It was around him every waking moment of every day, and it was something that not even the brightest of lights could chase away.
Especially not now that the light of Will's world had been taken so brutally from him.
It had all begun because of Olympus. The moment that Olympus had closed its doors, the magic that kept Camp Half-Blood a safe haven for the demigods had begun to wane and even fade.
Athena had had a theory that it was because of the inextricable link between the place and the gods' old home on Olympus, even if the rest of the remaining gods had transferred their seats of power to Theopolis, the hidden city floating in the middle of the Sound. Camp Half-Blood itself was still at risk because it remained tied to Olympus.
There had been a whole lot of construction going on in the camp as the campgrounds were being remodelled to better fit the egalitarian nature of the gods' tenure on Theopolis. Everyone was so focused on fixing things that no one was prepared when the borders failed entirely and monsters stormed the camp.
That day was the day that everything had gone entirely wrong. While most of the camp had only been a little worse for wear, there had been a great many tragedies that day. Much blood had been spilt at Half-Blood Hill. Of course, Nico had not been in any capacity to preside over the burial rites.
Nico's happiness, after all, had been one of the casualties of the battle.
Will shook his head sadly from side to side. The warmth of the sun upon his skin did nothing for him anymore. He remembered a time when it had been brighter. Warmer. Less bleak. More a symbol of the way that things had been looking up, instead of a reminder of how everything had irrevocably changed for the worse.
Will drew another deep breath, the chill of the air rattling his teeth. It was cold. So very cold. Yet, like the sunlight, even the gelid air was bleak. When it had once caused him such despair, wrapped him in a blanket of misery because he was a child of the Sun God, it did no such thing now. The cold was grey. Dark. Meaningless. Will couldn't think of better words to describe it.
Autumn had also used to mean better things. It had meant a time when things were beginning to wind down as the winter came. A time when stress wasn't nearly as high. A time when Will and Nico could spend more time together even if Will didn't like the cold.
Autumn used to be the time of year that reminded Will of how much he loved Nico. Now, it only served to remind him that things were just… deteriorating. As tears welled in Will's eyes once more, he was swept away into another memory.
It was a warm autumn day, and Will had the day off from work at the hospital. He had left Nico alone for a little while as he went to buy much-needed groceries. Even though he didn't work very many hours these days, Nico needed his attention more than anything and that didn't give him much time to do any shopping.
As he was walking home from the grocer's, Will was surprised to see a familiar motorcycle parked in the driveway of their little home. If the troublesome duo was visiting, he supposed he should have gotten more groceries. He hoped they would not stay for dinner.
Will walked up to the door, fished out his keys, and pushed it open. He saw Nico in the living room with a wide grin on his face. His hands were folded on his lap, his crippled legs covered by a blanket because Nico complained about them getting cold a lot.
There was a pillow squeezed between Nico's back and the back of the wheelchair, helping Nico maintain a somewhat decent posture. Nico always disliked having the damn thing there, though it seemed that today, Nico didn't mind. Will couldn't help but smile, seeing his husband happy.
Nico was deep in conversation with the couple that had been the talk of the town for the last few days: Jason and Percy, who somehow, had gotten into trouble with the law enforcement—the harpies—more times in the last couple of weeks than most people living at Theopolis combined.
"Good noon, gentlemen," said Will with a pleasant smile as he walked past, with the bags of groceries in his arms. Will jerked his head, gesturing for Jason to help. The son of Jupiter jumped up from where he was seated on the couch and made his way to Will as Percy grinned and waved.
Jason took two of the bags from Will's arms, leaving him with two more heaping ones. As he passed by Nico, his husband tugged at his sleeve. He chuckled and leaned down, pressing a kiss on Nico's forehead, unable to help blush at the hawk-like way that Percy was watching the whole exchange.
Jason raised an eyebrow as Percy said "Is he always like this?" Jason shared a look with Will, as though to tell him not to mind what Percy was talking about. "It's so cute!" said Percy, almost squealing with delight; "It's almost like every day is the first day you two fell in love."
It was Nico's turn to glow a rather fine shade of pink. Will laughed at the absurd situation before herding Jason off into the kitchen. He pointed Jason in the direction of the fridge while he took care of restocking the pantry.
While they were working, Will looked to Jason, having noticed that Percy seemed better adjusted today than most days. "How is Percy doing?" he said. He was privy to the knowledge that much of the trouble Percy had gotten into was a result of him trying to cope.
Jason stopped what he was doing. An awkward silence filled the air. After a moment, he shrugged and kept putting groceries into the fridge. "Better, I suppose," said Jason, voice filled with a weariness that Will could not blame him for. "He still has nightmares."
"He still has these times when he'll just zone out and stop talking," said Jason, looking with a profound grief at the bundle of leafy greens he was holding in one hand. "Then, after that, he'll just suddenly start crying." Jason tossed the vegetables into the crisper and sighed as he leaned back on the nearest counter. He propped himself up by his elbows and closed the door of the fridge with his foot.
Will walked over to Jason, halfway done restocking the pantry. He squeezed Jason's shoulder and said, "It will get better," with a sympathetic smile. "Gods know what happened was hard on him, but it's been years. He's probably in the last stages of moving on from what happened."
There was a look of doubt on Jason's face that Will recognized. It was one that was all too familiar to him. "I'm sure he does love you, Jason," he said, with a gentle smile; "It's just that this was the girl he went through Tartarus with. It's going to take some time."
Jason nodded and wiped the tears that had blurred his vision. He didn't think that this was a conversation he was ready to have. "If you don't mind," said Jason, looking about; "Can I use the bathroom?"
Will squeezed Jason's shoulder again. "Sure," he said, with a chuckle; "Use it however long you want." Jason laughed, too, though only half-heartedly.
Will watched sadly as Jason left the room. Most demigods simply never got a break. He was lucky that he last few years with Nico had been relatively peaceful. He shook his head and finished putting away all the groceries before he went back into the living room.
Standing by his husband, Will couldn't help the small smile that brightened his face when he saw Percy sit on Jason's lap and hold Jason's hand. "Will," said Nico, tugging at the hem of his shirt; "I want to go somewhere."
Nico was looking at Will with a serious face. Will did not like the look in Nico's eyes. He frowned and turned to Percy. The son of Poseidon held his two hands in the air as though to say he had nothing to do with what Nico was going on about.
"Uh," said Will, turning slowly back to his husband. He wasn't sure how to respond. On the one hand, he was thrilled that Nico was taking the initiative and wanted to go elsewhere, but at the same time, Nico's tone didn't seem to be boding well. "Sure," he said, after a moment of deliberation; "Just give me a place and date so I can make sure we're free to go."
Nico shook his head and looked meaningfully into Will's eyes, dark ones boring into blue ones as bright as the morning sky. "No, Will," said Nico; "I want to go somewhere now." Nico started to twist the silver skull ring around his finger like he always did these days when he was nervous about asking anything of Will. "I want to take the four of us to Venice."
Will froze where he stood, and yet again, he was conflicted about Nico's proposal. He admired the fact that Nico wanted to return to his hometown despite the painful memories probably associated with the place, but he also didn't like the fact that Nico was proposing shadow-travelling four people across the ocean.
Will was not having it. The last time that Nico had tried to cross the globe, he had ended up almost fading, and that was when Nico had been stronger than he was now. "No, Nico," he said; "You can't shadow-travel all of us there!"
"I know," said Nico, with a smile as though he'd planned all of this out, already; "That's why I asked Percy to come." Will's eyebrows drew together and he looked at Percy who was still feigning ignorance. "Mrs. O'Leary can help me, and dad's also lending a hand…"
Nico trailed off and looked into the distance. "You remember what you kept asking me about Venice?" he said, looking Will in the eye again. "You kept bugging me if the whole gondolier thing was true." Nico smiled to himself. "I want to take you on a gondola."
Will didn't know why, but the mere thought that Nico wanted to do something as sweet as taking him on a gondola cast all of his reservations out the window. He knew that he should have been the responsible adult, but he was tired of it. Both he and Nico needed a vacation, and if Hades was helping like Nico had said, Will wasn't opposed to it.
Nico couldn't help but smile when Will's strong arms wrapped around his torso, and the son of Apollo pressed their cheeks together. Nico pulled away and kissed Will's cheek. "Thank you," he whispered, as Percy whistled for Mrs. O'Leary and Hades appeared to take everyone along for the ride.
There was a sneer on Hades' face when he saw Percy and Jason, but Nico looked at his father and said "Dad, behave." Hades grumbled under his breath and moved everyone through the shadows and into the streets of Venice.
When Will was done fighting down his nausea, he looked up to see a gondola that looked like it was fresh from the underworld, along with a gondolier that looked suspiciously like Jules-Albert. He laughed at the sight. It was ridiculous.
"Charon likes to try and pick up some of the prettier souls on this gondola," said Nico; "At least he used to, until dad put a stop to it for 'unethical business practices.' If you ask me, I think dad just wanted the gondola to give rides to Persephone on the Styx."
Will started laughing all over again as Jules-Albert took off his hat and gestured for Will and Nico to get into the boat. Will looked at Percy and Jason who seemed rather put ill-at-ease by the whole thing. "What are you two going to do?" said Will.
"I think Percy and I are going to raid some of the restaurants around for something to eat." Jason looked up at the sky. It was already dark and the stars, what few of them that could be seen, had started coming out. "Yeah, we'll do that. Dinner would be nice. Have fun with the gondola."
"Oh, we will!" said Nico, waving as Percy and Jason walked away in the direction of the nearest establishment that looked like a coffee shop. "I wonder how they're going to talk to people," said Nico with amusement in his voice; "Neither one of them knows Italian."
Will shrugged. "I think that's for the better," he said, with a chuckle that Nico echoed. He threaded his arms underneath Nico's knees while Nico wrapped his arms around his neck. He grunted as he pulled Nico out of the wheelchair and carried the son of Hades off to the gondola.
The damn boat rocked from side to side as Will set Nico down, carefully, on the bed of cushions in the middle of the gondola. It had been somewhat of an ordeal. Nico had been steadily gaining weight over the last couple of months.
It was a good thing, even though it made Nico harder to carry around. Nico had been dreadfully thin during the time following the loss of his mobility. Will was simply glad that Nico was starting to return to health.
"What about your wheelchair?" said Will, as he slipped into the gondola beside his husband. Nico grabbed his hand and threaded their fingers together as the whole of Venice seemed to lose power, and all the buildings went dark. The only light in the canal came from the single lantern at the prow of the gondola, swinging languidly from side to side.
Nico held up his hand with its fingers interlocked with Will's to the light. Their twin rings, golden-silver that signified their union, glittered in the lamplight. Will smiled as Nico reclined against the pillows and looked up at Jules-Albert. "Monsieur Jules, could you please take care of it?" he said.
The gondola rocked from side to side as the zombie groaned in response and hopped off of the boat. The sudden movement struck a brief moment of panic in Will, one that was not missed by Nico. "You worry too much, Will," he teased.
The gondola rocked again when Jules-Albert returned to the gondola and undid the moorings that held them relatively still against the dock. Will looked around in wonder at the serenity of the entire place, smiling as he saw lights flickering to life in darkened windows from people lighting candles.
Will felt emotion swell in his chest and he just had to look at his husband, getting lost in Nico's dark eyes as he gently held Nico's chin and pressed their lips together in a passionate kiss. "Thank you, Nico," said Will, pulling away before touching his forehead to Nico's.
"No, Will," said Nico, looking deeply into the bright blue eyes of his beloved. "Thank you for everything." He stroked the side of Will's face with two fingers. "I love you, and I don't know what I would do without you."
Will pressed his lips again to Nico's as he whispered "I love you, too."
Will felt a smile grace his face as he lay back down to look up at the sky. He had expected pretty much what anyone would see in a modern-day city, but the sky was not filled with smog or light pollution. It was all cleared away, and the most brilliant night sky that he had ever seen stretched across the heavens, from one horizon to the other.
The canopy above was filled with twinkling stars set against the inky darkness of night. Along one side stretched the beautiful band of the milky way, and Will found his breath taken away by the wonderful sight.
There was a winged figure hovering by one of the rooftops, and for a moment, a candle being lighted illuminated his face. It was Eros, and he was grinning down at Will and Nico. He nocked an arrow and sent it screaming through the heavens, creating a shooting star that Nico pointed out to Will.
Eros was very heavily invested in these two. Their love had been so strong that despite everything they'd gone through, they were still together and happy. Eros wanted to give them the night of their lives, and he was sure that that was what they were having.
As the gondola sailed down the canal, Will wrapped his arms around Nico and hugged his husband. Never in a thousand years could he have imagined that he would be so in love with someone that would take him on a ride on a gondola, watching the stars glitter in the night sky as a zombie-chauffeur-turned-gondolier began singing in a terrible approximation of Italian that only a French zombie could possibly conceive of.
Nico and Will immediately started laughing. They rubbed their noses together and shared a few pecks every so often as they languidly went down the fabled waterways of Venice.
This was their kind of date. They had never been the kind of couple that enjoyed the sickeningly romantic stuff. As long as a date was meaningful, it was perfect for them. Spending an evening watching a clear sky on a gondola with an undead gondolier that was butchering Italian in the only way a French zombie could was definitely meaningful.
Neither Nico nor Will knew exactly what that meaning was, but they knew it was meaningful, and most of all memorable. This was just what they needed.
Nico looked into Will's eyes, full of adoration and love. Will looked into Nico's dark eyes. They were deep. They were filled with years of hardship and pain but somehow, also happiness that had remained despite all odds. Will was privileged to have helped put that happiness there.
Will had never seen such beautiful eyes before.
Will shuddered and brought his hands to his face as the memory faded from his mind's eye. He wept. Tears streamed down his cheeks and pooled in his open palms. He would never see those beautiful eyes ever again.
Will froze where he stood when he felt a pair of hands grab on to his hips. He tried his best to not stumble back, because he knew it would unbalance the man that had grabbed him.
Will felt those same hands climb up his torso, clinging on for dear life. He planted his feet firmly on the ground to provide as much support as he could for the man climbing up on him, the man whose weight was now so familiar to him that his body had gotten used to keeping it aloft.
"Will," said a voice, small, and weak, and seemingly excessively tired. It was a voice that nonetheless was trying to be strong in Will's time of need. "Will, I can tell you're cold, you know," said Nico; "Your hands are trembling as if you haven't had your fix of caffeine in weeks."
Will barked a forced, bittersweet laugh. Even Nico's humour, which used to be impeccable, seemed rather bleak these days. Everything about Will's new world was bleak. Dark. Almost meaningless. The only reason that Will kept going was because he didn't want Nico to grieve for him, though he could tell that Nico's sadness was profound.
Will was caught up in the fact that he would never get to see the beautiful eyes of his beloved ever again, but the truth cut both ways. His sparkling blue eyes were no longer that. The scar that stretched from one side of his face to the other, right across his eyes, made sure of that.
Apollo had healed Will, but had only just managed it. Even with all Apollo's expertise, the truth was resoundingly clear. The gods were not as powerful as they used to be, but they had gladly traded their power to be closer to their children.
What remained of those grand sapphires that Nico had used to love so much were just pale ghosts, reminders of what had once been. They were a reminder to Nico that Will's life was now filled with a darkness that could never be chased away, no matter how much he tried, no matter how much joy he tried to give Will.
Nico wrapped his arms, which were frail from disuse, around Will's shoulders. Part of the reason that Nico was so concerned was the fact that Will liked standing outside, on the porch, just staring out into the distance and crying every so often.
Nico didn't understand why Will did it, but the fact that Will stubbornly refused to wear anything warm in the autumn chill didn't help to alleviate Nico's concern. Will just wanted to feel everything. He wanted to feel alive, but without his eyes, without the beautiful colours of the world to regale him, everything was muted and seemingly dead.
Nico removed his arms from around Will's shoulders and clung on to the back of Will's shirt as he lowered himself back down onto his wheelchair. It wasn't until Nico had let go, and Will had heard the telltale creak of Nico sitting back down on the wheelchair, that Will relaxed his stance.
Will brought his arms up to his chest, surprised to find that there was a blanket wrapped around his shoulders. Will hadn't even noticed what Nico had done for him. The thick cotton sheet that normally protected Nico's legs from the cold were draped about him.
The blanket offered warmth and comfort from the crisp air, but Will still felt as though eve that warmth was muted. "I know you want to stand outside," said Nico, pausing for a moment because his voice broke under the weight of his grief.
Hazel was sitting on a chair nearby, watching the couple out of the corner of her eyes. She was crying openly, though she was trying her best to stifle her sobs. She walked over to Nico, the boards creaking under her feet. She handed her brother a handkerchief, but Nico waved it away and wiped his eyes with the backs of his hands.
It was simply so tragic, as far as Hazel saw it, that such beautiful people as her brother and his husband had to go through such a difficult and ugly time as this.
While Will was still adjusting to the new world he had suddenly found himself in, Hazel had decided to move in with them. Frank was often there, too, to help out with anything that either Will or Nico might need, but most of the time, he was off in New Rome, doing stuff related to his previous praetorship.
"But Will," said Nico, tugging at Will's shorts. Will wore them despite the fact that it was autumn. Nico simply didn't understand that the reason Will insisted on standing out in the porch during the afternoons was because it was a bitter reminder of the colours and of the world that he would never see again.
"You have to wear something," said Nico, the concern in his voice thicker than ever, "I don't want you getting sick."
Will turned, blindly casting his blank gaze in some direction he hoped was near Nico. It wasn't. He was facing the accessibility ramp that led up to the porch. Nico said nothing. Instead, what will felt was a tender hand against his thigh, gently coaxing him in the right direction. "Okay," he said, unwilling to say anything more.
Nico sighed, the sound so forlorn that it tugged at Hazel's heartstrings, and Will's, too, though he struggled to hide it. "I want to go inside now," said Will, as Nico looked up at him with eyes filled with sorrow. The sight of Will staring off into the distance was a difficult one to bear.
Will used to be so full of joy and hope. It was difficult to see him laid so low. It was painful to seem him so broken.
Hazel walked back to Nico's side, but Nico placed a hand on her wrist and said "I want to help Will memorize the layout of the house again, okay?" he said, "Just, please hold the door open, sis."
Hazel frowned, but she decided to let Nico do what he wanted. She walked over to the door, wiping her eyes as she went. She opened the door and kept it as wide open as she could.
Nico grabbed Will's left hand, letting the touch linger, before he placed it on the left push-handle of the wheelchair. "The other one's to your right, love," he said, hoping that Will would find it.
It took Will a few attempts. He fumbled, fingers clumsier than they had been before. Eventually he rammed his hand against the back of the wheelchair and followed it up to the edge of the seat before following that edge to the other push handle.
Will gripped both handles as Nico placed his hands on the push wheels of the wheelchair. "Just be careful, okay?" he said, looking over his shoulder, wishing for any sort of response from Will. Nothing. Just a barely visible nod.
Gently, Nico wheeled himself forward. The pace was excruciatingly slow, especially given the cold air, but Nico didn't want Will to stumble too much. Even at the pace they were going, Will had almost fallen over three times by the time that Nico reached the foot of the small accessibility ramp that had been installed to help him navigate the slight elevation of the doorframe.
Within the house was a little bit more of a hazard, and since Will hadn't yet gotten used to the layout of the place, even after a month, Nico had to take the lead. He nodded to Hazel as they passed by. She was going to make sure that nothing too bad happened, but mostly Nico wanted her to just keep watch.
When Will had been blinded on that fateful day, Nico had asked Hades for help, because gods knew that he and Will needed it. Since Will couldn't see anymore, it was no longer safe for him to push Nico up the accessibility ramp that allowed Nico to go to the second floor.
Instead, Nico had had the ramp dismantled, and a lift installed in its place beside the staircase. It was a small lift, one that didn't cost too much of a fortune, but it could handle both him and someone to push his wheelchair just fine.
Gently, Nico leaned back and removed Will's hands from the push-handles of his wheelchair. "Stay there, Will, okay?" he said. Will nodded in the direction of a potted plant in the corner. Had it not been such a tragic sight to see, Nico was pretty sure he would have laughed.
Nico wheeled himself into the lift before reaching out and grasping Will's hands in his own. Slowly, he pulled Will into the lift and pressed a button to close the door. He pressed another button and listened for the telltale sound of the mechanism beginning the slow process of raising them to the second floor.
While on the way up, Nico couldn't help but look at Will. His husband was silent and seemingly so profoundly sad that Nico felt like crying, too. Some part of him just wanted to give up because of all the pain and suffering that they had gone through, but he was a warrior even if he hadn't lifted a sword in almost a decade.
Nico wasn't going to let something like this get in the way of the happiness that he had paid dearly to get. The happiness that he had nearly given his life to protect.
The lift dinged and the door opened up to the second floor landing. Nico wheeled himself out and guided Will through the doors the same way he had earlier. He looked to the side and saw Hazel standing at the top of the nearby stairs, watching the couple with concern.
"Let's go to the bedroom?" said Nico, hopefully. He was wishing that Will would give more than just a one-word answer, but it didn't seem like he was going to.
Will simply stared dead ahead. "Sure," he said, and nothing else. Nico felt like crying, but he forced himself to keep up the facade that he was still strong, though he didn't know how much longer he could keep it up.
Once more, Nico guided Will's hands to the push-handles of the wheelchair. He wheeled himself to the bedroom, Will in tow. The two passed by Hazel, who took a step forward but was stopped by a meaningful look from Nico.
"Hey, sis," said Nico, not wanting to keep Will in the dark about whom he was talking to. He was also trying his best to keep the tears glimmering in his eyes out of his voice. Hazel frowned, but she said nothing. "Would you be a dear, Hazel, and start making dinner? I'll be down to help you as soon as I can."
"Alright, Nico," said Hazel, as she walked down the stairs. She looked back only to see her brother wiping tears from his eyes. "If you two need any help at all, you know how to call me, okay?" she said.
Nico nodded, not trusting himself to speak. "Come on, Will," he said, after a few moments had passed and he had calmed down. He led his husband through the door to the bedroom. He wheeled himself up to the bed and stopped right in front of it.
Nico grasped the bedframe and used it as leverage to lift himself onto the mattress. His legs dangled uselessly over the edge. Thankfully, his arms were still fully functional.
Nico grabbed one of the wheelchair's armrests and pulled it forward so that Will was standing right by the bed. He gently placed his hands on Will's and guided them to the bed. Will attempted to sit down, but it took him two tries before he ended up sitting on the edge just like Nico.
"Will," said Nico, looking at his husband with an expression filled with concern that Will would never see. "I want you to talk to me," he said, unable, any longer, to keep the tears out of his voice. He was on the verge of breaking down and sobbing. "It's so difficult seeing you this quiet…"
Will was facing the wall. "What's there to talk about?" he said, voice flat, words devoid of any of the joviality that used to be there. Nico felt terrible that Will still hadn't learned how to face the people that were talking, though part of him suspected that at this point, Will just didn't care.
"What's there to talk about?" repeated Nico, his voice incredulous despite the sadness in his heart. "Will," he said, placing a hand on Will's arm and squeezing it comfortingly; "I want to know if you're alright. I want to know how you're doing. How you're handling all this. I want to help you, but how can I do that if you won't talk to me?"
"I'm okay," said Will, his voice entirely lacking the emotions twisting like malignant snakes in his belly. "I'm doing fine," he said, blatantly lying to Nico's face; "I'm handling everything just fine."
The monotony of Will's voice was unnerving for Nico. He simply was at a loss when it came to what to do to help Will. "You don't have to help me," said Will, voice filling with self-deprecation and guilt; "I'm just a burden anyway."
The slap that followed made Nico gasp almost instantly. He had not meant to hit Will so hard, but what Will had just said had filled him with so much anger that he had acted out of instinct. "Don't you dare say that," Nico hissed.
Even though his arms were frail, Nico could certainly still make a man's face sting like a horde of bees had just swarmed it. He could see, clearly, the outline of his hand on Will's cheek.
Nico wasn't very familiar with the whole helping people through tough times ordeal, but he was trying his best. One thing that he knew without a doubt, however, was the fact that sometimes, Will had to get screamed at before he listened.
"Even if you are a burden right now," said Nico, the tears openly streaming down his face now; "I am one, too!" Nico shook his head and looked down at his lap. "Don't you think I felt bad about depending on you, too, when this shit happened?" he said, gesturing at his legs before he could think about what he was going to say.
"Oh shit," whispered Nico under his voice as he started to sob. He'd fucked up. "I-I'm sorry," he said; "I gestured at my legs. I wasn't thinking. Oh gods. I'm so sorry, Will."
Nico looked up only to see Will shrug, though he could tell from the way that Will's cheeks were wet that Will wasn't as emotionless as he was letting on. "If you are a burden, Will, you're my burden to bear, and I would gladly carry you, blind or not, because you make me happy. Because I love you."
Will wiped his eyes and took a deep, shuddering breath. "I'm sorry," he said, the practised flatness of his voice disintegrating in the face of the sudden swell of emotion that he felt. All of a sudden, things didn't feel so bleak because of those three words that Nico had just spoken. "I'm sorry for being an ass," he said; "I… I have to admit I'm not taking this very well."
Nico forced a laugh. "You don't say," he said. A smile tugged at his lips as he saw Will's lips twitch into something somewhat reminiscent of a smile. His heart started beating faster in his chest. Had he actually made progress? "Why were you crying?" he said, as he reached out and placed his hand on top of Will's.
Will flinched at the unexpected contact, though he supposed that pretty much all contact would be unexpected now that he was blind. "I—" Will didn't know, exactly, how to express the emotions that were coursing through him. He didn't know how to put into words the profound sense of loss that ruled his life now.
Instead, Will decided that he would say the one thing that was the cause of his distress more than anything else. "I was crying because I will never get to see your eyes again."
As soon as the words left Will's lips and hung in the air between them, Nico felt both warm and miserable all at once. He didn't know what to do. He could not say that maybe someday, Will would get to see them again. There was no guarantee of that, and he didn't think that giving Will false hope was worth the brief comfort of his words.
Instead, Nico did the only thing he thought was appropriate at the moment. He pushed himself along the edge of the bed closer to Will. "Do you remember them, though?" he said, as he raised Will's hands to his face.
Gently, Nico pried apart Will's fingers and pressed his husband's open palms to either side of his jaw. Nico held his breath as slowly, using his hands as guides, Will turned his head to look at Nico.
"I do," breathed Will as his fingers, slowly, gently, crept up Nico's face, bringing with them Nico's own fingers. Nico looked into the pale eyes that had replaced the once bright blue ones and found, instead, that his mind's eye saw them as they had once been, full of light and happiness and hope.
Will's thumbs grazed the tops of Nico's cheekbones, tenderly caressing Nico's skin. Will sobbed openly for once. "Oh gods," he whispered, as though he couldn't believe what he was doing with his hands. In his mind's eye he could clearly see those dark eyes that he had fallen in love with, that were filled with love for him. "I always will."
"I miss the time when your eyes used to be so bright," said Nico, looking at Will with an earnest expression even though he knew that Will would not see it. "They used to be so full of love, life, happiness—" Gently, Nico traced circles on the back of Will's left hand with his thumb.
"I miss your eyes, too," said Nico, looking into Will's pale eyes once again; "But I'll always remember how they were before everything happened. The way that they lit up when they saw me the same way that you light up a room when you enter it…"
"It doesn't matter if they're not the same eyes anymore, Will," said Nico, bringing a smile to his face as he spoke; "I still have you and as long as I remember what you were like before, I just need to close my eyes and I will always see the man that I fell in love with, the man I'm still in love with."
Nico was speaking from the bottom of his heart. It was something that he had never been good at, but for the sake of Will, something that he hoped was sufficient.
"I want you to touch my eyes, Will," he said, as Will's thumbs crept slowly upward. "I want you to learn them with your fingers." Will's thumps gently pressed against the hollows of Nico's eyes. Nico closed his eyes, relishing the warmth of Will's hands.
"I want you to touch them and remember because I'll tell you right now, Will," said Nico; "These eyes haven't changed yet. They're still the same. They're still filled with love for you. They will still roll at your bad jokes. Nothing can change them in your memories, even when they grow dull as we get older."
There was definitely a smile playing on Will's lips now. He did as he was told. Tears were streaming down the sides of his pale eyes. He remembered the way that he had looked into Nico's dark eyes when they'd kissed while treading the water that day by the pier.
Nico's eyes were as beautiful in his mind's eye as he was sure they had been on the day that the memory of them had been made.
Will brushed his thumb over Nico's brows, then over Nico's eyelids, feeling each individual hair of Nico's lashes graze the underside of his thumb. Will remembered the way that Nico's eyes had reflected the faint starlight on that night in Venice, on that gondola, while the singing French zombie-chauffeur-turned-gondolier butchered the Italian language so badly that Nico and Will had to laugh.
Before Nico knew what was happening, Will was crying in happiness. He was laughing all over again, the sound like sweet music to Nico's ears.
Nico didn't resist when Will pulled him forward, and after a few failed attempts, pressed their lips together in a passionate kiss.
Will didn't know what he had done right in his life for the Fates to grant him the privilege of being the partner of someone as amazing as Nico, but he was thankful for it, despite all the other terrible things that had happened in their lives.
Perhaps, in this his darkest hour, Will had not truly lost the light of his world. As he kissed his husband with the kind of passion that only true love could beget, he couldn't help but think to himself that the light of his world was not his eyesight.
The light of Will's world was the man that sat on the bed before him. The man that had promised him a future together, no more, and no less, and had kept that promise fully. The man that was the bright flame that gave him strength to keep going despite the shadows that clung to him each moment of every passing day.
Will didn't need the light of the world, not so long as he had Nico, because Nico di Angelo was his light, and he needed nothing more than that.
A/N: So. There we go. :3. Bittersweet story of Solangelo. Please, do tell me what you think of the story. I would love to hear your thoughts about the way that Will is reacting to his new disability, and how Nico is handling things. What did you think of the cutesy memories that I put in here and there? Did they make the blow at the end ultimately more emotional?
If you liked the story, please, do favourite it! If you like me on the other hand, leave a review because I would love to read what you have to say about this story. 3.