A/N: A Saku/Naru fic? Yes. I'm pushing myself to write outside of my favorite pairings, thanks in large part to a long discussion with pharix. It might take me a while to get back to this because I have "After All" and "Wounded" to work on, but here's a first chapter. Title is subject to change, but I like it for now.

I know parts of this read a lot like chapter 8 of "After All," but they're not connected. I just liked the main idea behind that scene and wanted to take it further, in a case where Lee's not in the picture.

I'm actually going to use the post-Pein wreckage that is Konoha as a plot device in this story as opposed to making Pein's self-sacrifice return everything to normal like I did in my other two fics. Yay for not creating loopholes to be lazy!

Anywho, please read and review. And let me know what I need to fix to get Naruto's character nailed down. He's the protagonist of the series and we know tons about him - despite and because of this, I'm worried about getting him right. Plus, once again, I'm a female trying to write as a guy. I'm a glutton for punishment.

Masashi-san's characters/series. My story.

Quick bit o' Japanese for ya:

Baka: Stupid

Dobe: Dropout; loser

Arigato: Thank you

Ero Sennin: Jiraiya - "Pervy Sage"

Dattebayo: Naruto's catch phrase - "Believe it!"

Block of italics = flashback

Edited the flashback a little bit to make it less stilted. Hope it works better.

Chapter 1

I never did have a way with words, especially with her.

I had no idea what to say to her now, standing in the middle of the ruins of Konohagakure.

I'd just witnessed the fall of my greatest adversary - a man who could've, in a different life, been my friend. My brother disciple under Ero Sennin. Nagato. Pein.

I was ready to collapse where I stood. That was a great image: The village hero, the future Hokage, Uzumaki Naruto, unconscious in the street with a mouthful of dirt.

"Sakura!"

I saw a pink blur and felt a sharp pain in my head. "You're always so rash, baka!"

I loved the hell out of her, but damn, was she abusive.

"Arigato." She pulled me into a hug, catching me off guard again.

It was really nice. It almost felt like things were the way they should be. I enjoyed the feel of her hands on my face and the sound of her voice before I was swept up into a crowd.

"Hey! Don't shove!" I yelled, but nobody listened.

I'd thought this kind of acknowledgment would be exactly what I'd always wanted. I fantasized about being celebrated like this when I was a kid. But now it didn't seem to matter as much. All the glory in the world was useless without someone to share it with.

Sakura ran off to see Tsunade-baachan once the villagers started tossing me in the air. I wanted to follow her, but I went along with the revelers' plans instead.

Later, as I built a makeshift tent out of scraps from what used to be my apartment building, I started thinking about Sakura again. I'd really wanted her to stick around a while, but I understood she had duties to attend to.

'Ah, well... at the end of the day, she'll come home to me,' I reminded myself.

Yep. The girl I loved was also my flatmate. Until I'd realized that everything in our village was rubble, I was looking forward to spending time with her at home again.

With all the things I ran around doing, plus her busy schedule in the Hokage's office and hospital, our evenings together had been a sacred time to unwind. We'd cook dinner and talk and laugh. Sometimes we'd rent a movie or a video game. It was simple stuff, but I loved every second of it.

Occasionally, when we were settled on the couch watching something on TV, she'd lean her head against my shoulder or let me play with her hair. She'd smile and sigh. Those were my favorite times. Seeing her relaxed and happy made me feel like I was doing something worthwhile.

It would be a long time before that happened again. Besides, I was lucky she was still talking to me after what I put her through, leaving without so much as a proper "goodbye," then all the chaos of today. Maybe she wouldn't come home to me. The thought jerked my mind back to the last conversation we'd had.

"Naru..." She always used that tone when she was about to say something I didn't want to hear, and when she used her nickname for me, I knew it was going to be even worse.

Ero Sennin's funeral had been that morning, and Sakura sought me out in the place only she would know to find me - our old training ground from our first days with Kakashi Sensei. Only she knew the places I went to think, and only she knew how much I needed her.

After seeing how Tsunade-baachan's relationship with my mentor turned out, I'd gotten it into my head that I needed to just seize the day and kiss Sakura already... Such a stupid idea.

I dropped my head in defeat as she recited her speech about how she thought of me as a brother, adding stuff about how I was grieving and not thinking straight. What a load of bull. My thinking would have to be screwed up to NOT want to be with her.

She had feelings for me. I knew it in my bones, and I was determined to make her admit it.

"There's something between us. I can sense it just like you can."

I reached out and tucked a lock of her soft, pink hair behind her ear, tracing my fingers down her jaw and under her chin. Her eyes widened, but she didn't resist me. I was known for being impulsive, but I was still a little bit nervous about what I was doing.

I'd taken it this far, though... it was now or never. I leaned toward her again, half expecting her to chakra-punch me. It would've been totally worth it, but she didn't.

I was really careful at first. I was still a little worried she might send me sailing across the forest. I never thought she'd kiss me back.

Our lips fit together like two puzzle pieces. I felt my arms slide around her waist. It was easier and more natural than just about anything I'd done before. One of her hands touched my cheek. In a few seconds, I went from feeling one of the greatest pains of my life to feeling happier than ever before. I got lost in it.

When it stopped, I could only stare at her. Words wouldn't come to me.

"Naru… to..." Sakura gasped.

She was breathless and more beautiful than I'd ever seen her. She touched her lips like she was checking if they were still there, then pulled away from me. "I... I have to go." She stood to leave, wobbling a little.

'Crap,' I thought, slapping my forehead. 'What possessed me to do that? Oh, yeah... I'm in love with her. Duh.'

"Wait!" I grabbed her hand. "Please don't go! I'm sorry."

I really wasn't sorry. I would never regret that kiss, but I lied because it was what she wanted to hear.

"I have to, Naruto. I'm..."

"I know. It's Sasuke," I sighed, remembering my promise to her. It was always about Sasuke. "I said I'd bring him back to you. I'm a bastard for doing this. I'm sorry."

"No... It's not your fault... I'm just..." she lowered herself back down to kneel beside me.

She was struggling to not cry. Her sad face made me forget that Sasuke was my friend. I suddenly wanted something very bad to happen to him.

"I'm just... being we-"

"Don't say you're weak, Sakura. You're far from weak. You're amazing. Dattebayo!" I gave her the biggest grin I had in an attempt to cheer her up.

It was fake, of course. After being shot down so many times, I'd managed to really fine-tune my 'happy, goofy Naruto' act.

She laughed a little, but she was still upset. "Why can't I get over him, Naruto? He never loved me. He's a traitor to the village and a murderer. What's wrong with me?"

I couldn't think of anything to say other than the truth.

"Nothing. You're human."

She looked at me for a second like I'd said something profound, then nodded. "I guess you're right."

I stood up, dusted myself off, and offered her a hand. "Let's go home."

She accepted my help, but looked uneasy. "I can't. This is my night on call at the hospital."

This wasn't good. I really didn't want things to stay weird like this. I wanted her to come home with me so we could eat ramen and watch crappy "Dragon Ball" reruns. We could forget this even happened. Well, I couldn't, but she could.

"I guess I'll see you later, then."

"Yeah." She turned to walk away.

"Sakura?"

"Yes?" She looked over her shoulder at me.

"We're... okay, right?"

"Sure. See you later."

I never had seen her later. Not really. She was around, but we didn't talk much. She stayed busy with Tsunade-baachan during the day, and at night, she'd take her dinner to her room and stay there until morning.

I knew I'd freaked her out, but I also knew she'd come around and talk to me eventually, so I hadn't pushed it. I'd just really hoped it would happen soon. I missed her.

I'd thought about how unfair life was. I missed Sasuke, too, but Sakura was denying herself so much happiness waiting for him to come back - waiting for me to bring him back like I said I would.

Sakura was a lot of things, but above all, she was loyal to the people she cared about, even to a fault. It was usually an admirable trait, but it was killing me then.

It had hurt too much to be so close to her and know she had an invisible shield up at all times. She wouldn't let herself feel anything for anyone but him. I hated that barrier.

Sometimes, when I'd look at her, I could see Sasuke in her eyes, smirking, taunting me. "She'll never love you, dobe."

I knew she cared about me, but she just wouldn't let herself show it. I wished I knew how to break down the wall between us, for both of our sakes. I knew I could make her happy if she'd just let me in. I'd even consider breaking my nindo just this once if I could get her to forget about Sasuke and accept me. I would replace my promise to return Sasuke with a promise to love her forever. I already would, anyway, so no challenge there.

I really hadn't wanted to leave things that way with her, but Geezer Sage wasn't willing to wait any longer, so I'd had to leave her a note on the kitchen table the morning I left.

Sakura,

I'm leaving to train with the toads. I wanted to say "bye", but you've been so busy lately and I didn't want to bother you. I'm sure you won't even notice I'm gone. :-p

My share of the rent for the next couple months is in an envelope on top of the fridge.

Take care of yourself. I'll miss you.

-Naruto

I never did have a way with words, especially with her.