This was lying around my files for the last few weeks and I decide, what the heck, I'll put it up. Disclaimer: I don't own The Inheritence Trilogy or Snow Patrol's song 'Run'
I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done
"Murtagh, darling, come on, we have to go! I told you we're leaving here to go on holiday" I said, pleading with my petulant son.
The night was dark as I stood is his room. The only light was from the candle I'd lit earlier on when I'd first come up to get him. It was cold and he stood beside his bed, half dressed, his jet black hair tousled from sleep. He was so like his father, the man I'd come to despise. And now, he was playing my own son against me.
Murtagh scowled at me.
"No!" he snapped.
I hushed him urgently.
"Murtagh, my baby, we need to go now! I want to save you, I have to!" I pleaded to him quietly.
He looked up at me, eyes alive with curiosity. How could I leave here without him? How would I do that? He was too precious to me, the only thing I'd done that I was proud of in the last few years. Ever since I'd left with Morzan, I'd done nothing but bring shame on myself. And then I'd given him a son, an heir. Well, he wasn't getting a second one, never.
"Murtagh, please, let's go!" I begged.
He pulled on a pair of trousers and I sighed, relieved he'd complied.
And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here
I drank in his image, pleased with what I saw.
My handsome young son, so like his father that it pained me to see them together.
And together they were.
Morzan was raising Murtagh to be like him. He'd gave Murtagh anything he wanted, Murtagh's colt, his hunting dog, his dagger, his toys, all Murtagh had to do was ask and he received. But it was bribery. Morzan took Murtagh hunting with him, showed him how to kill. How to use magic. Murtagh hadn't cracked it yet, but he would soon enough and then Morzan would show him to Galbatorix as though Murtagh was a prize winning horse.
I gently turned Murtagh around and lifted his shirt, looking at the long scar on his back that was now mending. I ran a finger along it and Murtagh shivered, the hairs on the nape of his neck rising.
He turned around and embraced me around the waist. I kissed the top of his head and taking his hand, I led him gently out into the corridor.
As long as I had Murtagh, I would have the strength to leave this place, no doubt about it.
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
We hurried through the palace, down flight after flight of stairs and out into the courtyard. I hurried across and slipped out the gates I'd unlocked earlier on.
Murtagh followed me obediently, confused as to what I was doing.
I hurried out the road toward the main walls, eventually abandoning the road and hurrying, hidden, behind the overgrown hedges at the side of the road.
I turned of toward the hole in the wall, it had been blasted last week by the dynamite that had 'accidentally' exploded, my doing of course.
Murtagh looked behind me and whimpered, a thumping noise echoing through the silent night.
I glanced briefly over my shoulder and had to bite my tongue to stop myself from yelling. Horsemen were riding toward us, a dozen of them, armed with swords.
I hurried on, hoping to reach the wall.
Murtagh stumbled and fell, rolling beneath the hedge and pulling me under with him.
"Mama, I'm scared!" he whispered.
I rolled over and hugged him.
"Don't be Murtagh, don't be. You stay here. I'll go but you have to stay here, promise me you won't come out tail all is quiet and there's no one in sight" I said, stroking his hair.
"Mama, don't go!" he begged, tears rolling down his face.
I kissed his cheek.
"I have to but I'll be back for you, I promise. I won't be long" I said, rubbing his chin.
He sobbed.
"I promise, Murtagh, I promise" I said, getting out from under the hedge. I turned and tried to block out the image of his eyes, pleading with me to stay. I paused for but a moment then hurried on. I hadn't been on the move more than five minutes when I heard Murtagh, my darling, my baby, my son yelping loudly with fear.
I'd finally reached the hole in the wall and slipped through it, muttering enchantments of protection from view. I lay still on the ground, my heart thumping in my throat. I whispered promises in my head to Murtagh in the Ancient Tongue, determined to give him whatever protection from his father I could. My last prayer for my son. That he wouldn't let the dark steal his light from him. For me. To protect himself and his soul. To know I would always be with him. Soldiers past bye and I sobbed silently, my heart breaking into tiny pieces in the space of half an hour of leaving my son.
Louder Louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say
I heard more footsteps and he appeared, walking slowly, hands clasped behind his back.
With him were two soldiers dragging Murtagh with them. He looked terrified, eyes wide with fear.
"Call her" Morzan said harshly, spinning around to glare at Murtagh.
Murtagh shivered like a rabbit caught in the light of a lantern, opened his mouth and froze in fear.
"Call her!" snapped Morzan, cuffing Murtagh round the head.
Murtagh stood terrified, unable to speak.
Morzan raised his fist to strike and in that split second I tried to yell. Tried to tell him I was there and I'd go back quietly. I opened my mouth and nothing came out. The second past and Morzan brought his fist down, punching Murtagh across the face.
Murtagh's head rolled with the blow and he fell to the ground with a dull thud.
I tried to be brave and give myself up but I did my usual, cowardly action. I ran silently, leaving Morzan and my son behind quickly, hot tears rushing down my face and I understood why we'd both been unable to speak.
Fear.
Paralysing fear.
Fear of a man I used to love.
Fear of what he could do.
I'm not going to let my second son be born into fear...
A YEAR LATER
To think I might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbye
I nearly do
"Are you sure you can't stay any longer?" asked Garrow.
I sat beside him on the fallen tree and he put his arm around my shoulder.
"I'm positive brother" I told him.
And I was positive. I would have loved to stay. There was something tranquil about it. Murtagh would have loved it. And Eragon would love it. He was only four months but I'd stayed much too long with Garrow already. He had his own family to look after. His boy, Roran was an adorable little lad, when he wasn't pulling my hair and screaming the small house down.
"But it's a bit sudden Selena. Leaving tonight?" said Garrow, frowning.
"I know. I'm going back to the house to say goodbye to Eragon then I'm gone. Thank you Garrow, thank you for helping me. Please, look after him" I said, getting to my feet and wrapping my cloak tightly around me.
Garrow stood and enveloped me in a hug.
"Be careful" he whispered.
"I will. Can I have a few moments with Eragon? Alone" I asked.
Garrow nodded and I hurried back to the house. The door was unlocked and I opened it, making my way over to Eragon's crib. He cooed softly up at me as I leaned over and I tickled his chin, making him giggle. Marian called out that she was going to the market and I heard the door close. Marian and Garrow had been good to me.
I looked down at Eragon and he stared back up at me with large, brown eyes. This would be the last time I'd ever see him. I blinked back large tears, determined not to break down in front of Eragon.
"I love you. Goodbye" I choked out.
Eragon blinked up at me and giggled and I turned, fleeing for the second time in my life, scared for myself and for my first son who I'd left alone with a monster.
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
Even though I knew Eragon would be fine with Garrow, I couldn't't help but whisper a few prayers for him, to leave my love as I hurried up into the Spine. Garrow would be a better father than Morzan and Marian was a far better mother than I.
Eragon would shine. He would. He'd have to, for me. I was determined of it.
Even if I couldn't't be with him, I'd know. I knew he'd be a great man. Murtagh was the one I was worried about.
If only...
If only I'd been able to bring him with me...
If only I'd never fallen for Morzan...
If only things had been different...
TWO WEEKS LATER
Slower Slower
We don't have time for that
All I want's to find an easy way
To get out of our little heads
I lay still in the soft bed, propped up on pillows, my strength ebbed down to the last stump.
I was back in Morzan's castle, and I'd been back for a week though I had yet to see Murtagh.
"Mama!" came a yell as Murtagh tore down the corridor to my bedside.
A guard followed, trying to keep up as Murtagh jumped onto my bed and wrapped his still growing arms around my neck in a quick hug.
I laughed softly and drank in the image of my big boy.
"Mama, where were you? I called for you every night before I fell asleep and you didn't come! But I didn't cry Mama. I was brave" he boasted, puffing out his chest.
I smiled gently.
"Quietly love. I'm very tired" I told him.
I had dreaded that he would tell me he'd called for me. But all that mattered now was making sure I told him as much as possible before I d- had to go.
The guard stood by my bed, shifting from foot to foot awkwardly.
Murtagh grinned at me.
I reached out and stroked his cheek.
"Darling, I need to tell you somethings that are very secret" I whispered, making sure the guard couldn't't hear me.
Murtagh grinned at me and I felt a touch in my mind.
"Hello Mama" came Murtagh's voice clearly in my mind.
I gasped and stared at my boy in shock.
I quickly got over my shock and I started talking with him, out loud, about the deer Morzan kept for hunting to distract him while I mulled over what I had to tell him. Did he need to know about Eragon?
Now at the moment, at least...
Have heart my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even is it's just for a few days
Making up for all this mess
Death loomed over me, growing ever closer but I pushed it aside and went for a walk in the gardens with Murtagh. He'd had to wheedle and plead with Morzan but finally, Morzan consented grudgingly on the condition we would be under guard the entire time.
Murtagh bounced along beside me, talking a mile a minute, unaware of how pale I was. I was glad he didn't realise what was happening, it made me happier to see him so carefree. I had a stabbing pain behind my eyes and I felt as though I were made of heavy glass but otherwise, it was quite pleasant. But for the knot of fear clenching and un-clenching in my gut I would have been over the moon.
Murtagh tugged my arm and I was brought back from my thoughts and into the real world.
"Mama, I love you and I'm glad your back" he said quietly.
I smiled down at him.
"I am too Murtagh" I replied.
He beamed at me and I slipped back into my own thoughts.
I had less than a week, that was certain and I had yet to tell Murtagh anything about Eragon. My whole life had been one big mess ever since I'd left with Morzan. And now, when I was trying to clean it up, I couldn't't find the words to do it.
I felt a stab of pain run through my chest and I fell to the ground, doubled up in pain. I saw tears welling up in Murtagh's eyes and he knelt beside me. My head lolled to the ground against my will and things became blurry. I felt a small hand slip into mine and I decided to close my eyes, just for a second. Or maybe a small nap. Or maybe...
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
Hope you enjoyed it. Reviews are appreciated but not demanded.