Dear Jethro,
Where should I start? There is so much to say. I guess I should start with I'm so sorry, for everything. But you got over Shannon and Kelly, you'll get over me too. But you never really got over them, did you? This makes me wonder what you'll think of me now that I'm gone. Will I fall in with your ex-wives? I like to think that I mean more to you than that. But how could I? I broke your heart, and you never knew it but I broke mine too. For days afterward I wondered how I could ruin the best thing that ever happened to me. Walk away from the only man I ever loved. But the answer always came, no matter how much I wanted to take it back. And then I was your Director. You were back in my life and me in yours, things were different but when I saw you I knew I had never stopped loving you and wishing it was all a dream. Did you know what that did to me? That night I cried myself to sleep with memories of how we were, how we might still be if it wasn't for my selfish ambition. I know what you'd be telling me now. You wouldn't blame me; you'd tell me to stop doing this to myself. But I can't it will never go away. The guilt, the anger, regret and the love will haunt me till the day I die. Ha! If only you knew how soon that was. But I can't tell you, it would make it real and I can't handle it. You'll find out soon enough, I'm strong but not that strong, I'm getting weaker and I know I won't survive. I can't imagine what you're thinking now that I've told you everything. I can only hope that you still love me after all I've done to you. I know someday we will be together again and frankly I don't know how long I'll be able to wait, but I'll wait forever if l have to, to finally have our happily ever after. I'm so sorry but I have to stop now, it's too hard and someone is at the door, funnily enough it's you. Just know that I'll always love you, no matter what you think of me.
Forever Yours,
Jenny