Pain
I smirk at the blood that runs down my arms not knowing if it's mine or yours. The blood, among other liquids, has mingled becoming one on every surface available. It's on you , it's on me, the sheets and covers, and all of the furniture. I look at you, you don't seem to be able to move let alone hear me but I begin talking anyway first it's silent mutterings to myself cataloging any visible wounds and coming up with logical excuses to tell people. Then I begin talking to you trying to rouse you from the stupor you're in.
"Marui-sempai" I whisper in your ear softly at first then again louder and louder until you're looking at me straight and the slack jawed expression has melted away.
"A-akaya" it's the only thing you can manage to say which is fine. You are laying still now eyes closed breathing deeply content, you know it's over we managed again without anyone finding out. Ours is a secret relationship forged of stolen, bloody sex and fake promises. We leave after and then go home, heal, return to our respective other, but when the urge calls again or boredom rings we cannot help but answer pitifully.
For you Jackal-sempai can't provide a thrill in sex, you love him unconditionally otherwise bit you find the bedroom lacking. Renji isn't even willing to have sex yet with me because, I'm not old enough. He wants to wait and I can't bear it much longer. Ours is a relationship based on the sole need for pleasure and sex. Strange how it started out as an idea of Niou-sempai's and bloomed to be like it is, wouldn't he be proud. Yagyuu-sempai would kill him if he actually agreed though, they could be a scary couple.
"I have to go Marui-sempai. Renji wants to go on a date tonight." I am standing at th door ready to go, after a shower and cleaning up the room. "Take a shower, call Jackal-sempai, go out it'll go you some good. Don't forget to send the sheets to the cleaners alright." I pull on my shoes after my usual speech "Call me if you need me." we both know what that means though.
I don't look back, I go home and do exactly as I planned take another shower and get ready to see Renji. All the while I am pondering relationships mine and others. First Marui-sempai 's and mine and Renji's and mine and then with my other sempai's. And my sempai's with each other. It's interesting to think how relationships can be so complicated like Mura-buchou's harem or so simple like Yagyuu-sempai and Niou-sempai.
My relationships are strange too, Renji's and mine was sort of expected sort of not seen from a mile away. Lot's of people predicted he would be with Inui Sadaharu from Seigaku but that ship had sailed. I love Renji so I said yes when he asked. The only reason I'm with Marui-sempai is to fulfill mutual desires. Renji wants to wait until I'm a little older before we go that far. I don't think Marui-sempai and Jackal-sempai have gotten past foreplay and I know Marui-sempai just wants to feel that spark.
It's a harsh relationship based on pain, blood, and sex all the things needed to sate a teenage boy's libido. No love just lust and sex, always Marui-sempai's apartment because Renji and I share one. It's an addicting relationship not because of any attachments just because. Once you start you can't stop like smoking, drugs, or alcohol it's just because. Renji once explained it likening sex to primal, animal instinct thats what is is too. He said sex appeals to our needs and wants as mammals because we are animals.
It is a bad relationship to be in and I know I told myself once Renji and I started but I don't think I can ever give up this blissful pain.
A/N: I know I have not put up Word of the Day for four day's it's because I'm lazy. This was mostly typed so i just finished it for the heck of it. Thats all for now. Bye.