I wrote this in order to avoid writing my essay!

I don't really think that Edward would act this way, but it was still fun to play with the idea!!

This first chapter is loosely based on the Taylor Swift song 'The Other Side Of The Door'. If you haven't heard it, I strongly recommend giving it a listen!!

xoxoxo

As I sat in the middle of the meadow which we used to share, I wished for one second that I was human again. My body wanted the ability to cry, and I wished, for the first time since I was turned, that it were possible. Instead, I sobbed tearlessly to myself, and remembered all that had happened between us. In the heat of the fight, I had walked away from Edward, for the first time in my life, both mortal and immortal. It had pained me to do it, but somehow I had managed it. Edward had been shouting after me, trying to get me to come back and talk things through, but I had ignored him and carried on running. I was so mad at that point, that I didn't know if I would be able to keep my emotions under control.

Edward and I had been arguing for days. Nessie's body had finally stopped ageing and she was now a glorious young woman. Jacob had been spending more and more with her recently, to Edward's annoyance. I knew that he was hoping that Nessie would get bored of Jacob's presence. Over time, I had grown to accept Jacob's connection to my daughter. I could see that she doted on him as much as he doted on her. I also knew that it was pointless trying to pull them apart; as soon as her body had turned 16, Nessie had been more attached to Jacob than Edward liked. Then, two days ago, Jake had come to ask Edward and me for our permission. He wanted to ask Nessie to marry him, and I knew how hard it must have been for him to come and ask Edward, but I knew that he wanted to do everything properly. Jake and me had already had this discussion, and I had given him my permission, but I had also urged him to ask Edward for his permission. Jake knew as well as I did that Edward was a traditional person and I knew that it would enrage him if he wasn't asked. So, Jake had taken my advice and had asked Edward for his permission. It took all of Edward's decades of carefully practiced control for him to let Jake leave alive...

"Edward, you had to know this was coming..." I knew that I had to try and make Edward see sense, for Nessie's sake, if nothing else.
"Bella, you can't expect me to allow Nessie to go without a fight...to a werewolf, least of all!" I knew that Edward would find this hard, but his tone shocked me. It sounded like he was having trouble keeping himself in control. I headed over to him, wrapping my arms around his waist, trying to soothe him.
"Edward, try and see this from Nessie's point of view. You know that she loves Jake, no matter how much you don't like it. You'll break her heart if you refuse him, Edward."
"Bella, you've seen how dangerous werewolves can be...look at Emily. Sam doted on her, and she got hurt."
"Edward," I kissed him softly. "You've seen inside Jake's mind; witnessed first-hand the lengths he's gone to to protect her. Do you truly believe that he could ever hurt her?"
"Bella, at least try to see my side –"
"No, you try and see Jake's side. Or even Nessie's side. You know what it does to her when she has to leave him. Were we so different from them?"
"I have those boundaries for her protection."
"Just like you had our boundaries for my protection. But I was right then, and I am right now. You never did anything to hurt me, and Jake will never do anything to hurt Nessie."
"Bella, I can't do this! I can't just stand back and let my daughter marry a monster!" he turned from me and slammed his fist into the wall. His actions shocked me more than anything. He was starting to lose control, and I was afraid that I would end up hurting him by trying to stop him.
"You never wanted her!" I had screamed at him. From the shocked look on his face, I could see that he was hurt, but the newborn in me couldn't seem to find a way to stop. For one of the first times since Edward had turned me, I was no longer in control of myself. "When we found out I was pregnant, you wanted to get rid of her! How can you expect to have the authority over who she does or doesn't marry? How can you expect to have any fucking hold over her?! If you don't allow her this, she will hate you forever, Edward! You will end up pushing her away. You can count on that." Edward didn't reply. He was too stunned to say anything. "I've already given Jake permission, Edward! He can marry her. He is good for her, and he truly does love her. What more do you want for her?!"

Edward had walked away from me at that point, letting out an angry growl. I had screamed at him some more, trying to get him to see this from a point of view other than his protective father stance. I had reminded him about how hard it had been for Charlie to agree to our marriage, even more so because he didn't know the whole truth. After being ignored and growled at for several minutes, I had stormed out of the cottage as fast as I could, thanking God that Nessie had been out with Jake, and had not witnessed her parents rowing over a decision which was ultimately hers.

As I sat in the meadow, my body wanted nothing more than to go back to Edward, to feel his touch. I still wasn't over my newborn feelings, and still ached for him every second we weren't together. My mind was somewhat more rational than my body. I set off running, not stopping until I reached Charlie's house. He was on a fishing trip with Billy, and I knew he would be gone until dark. As I paced around my old bedroom, all of the furniture arranged in the same way as it had been when I had left, I wondered how we had got to this point. Edward had known for a long time that this would be coming, and I had done my best to help him to understand that this was what was best for our daughter; that Jake would be able to protect her just as much as we could. I looked at my reflection in the mirror, the glorious immortal that I had become staring back at me, my eyes now exactly the same shade as Edward's. Looking around the room, my eyes fell on the scrapbook which I had been given for senior year. As I flicked through, seeing all of the pictures of my human self with Edward, I did start to see his point of view a little. I knew that Nessie was the most important thing to him; she was now the most fragile thing in his world, and it was hard for him to let her go. Especially to a man who had once been his sworn enemy. Vampires were set in their ways, and it took a lot to change us, as I had been told so regularly by Edward and Carlisle. I shook my head, surprised that we had managed to allow something come between us. We had always sworn that nothing would ever divide us or drive us apart, and Edward had once insisted that he would not allow Jacob to "drive a wedge" between us.

I was over at the window in a second, and I threw it open and suck my head out. I didn't know if he would be able to hear me from here, but I gave it a try anyway, screaming to him.
"EDWARD, I LOVE YOU!!"
I stood at the window, waiting and calling, for ten minutes before giving up, and deciding that he either couldn't hear me, or was choosing to ignore me. Slamming the window closed, I headed into Charlie's room, finding the album with my wedding pictures, and took it back to my own room. I started flicking through them, remembering the day through the hazy clarity of my human memories. I stopped on the picture of Edward eating the wedding cake, and laughed out loud at the expression on his face. Then, I lingered on a picture of our first dance as man and wife. We were both looking lovingly into one another's eyes, knowing that this was the first day of our forever. I let out a small, tearless sob as I thought of where we were at now.
At that moment, I heard a tapping sound coming from the window. I headed over to see Edward standing beneath me, throwing pebbles at my window to catch my attention.
"I love you!" he screamed up to me. It had started to rain, and he was already soaked. I opened the window for him, and he was up in a second. As he perched on the window ledge, I looked up into his face. Sorrow was etched across his perfect features, and I hated seeing him this way. I pulled him through the window and into my arms in less than a second, and he tightened his arms around me, as though he was afraid that I was going to leave him again.
"I'm sorry," I whispered, just loud enough for him to hear. A part of me wanted Edward to hate me. I wanted Edward to shout at me, and threaten that he was leaving me, for the way I had acted earlier on.
"You've nothing to be sorry for," he shushed me, crushing me more tightly to him, if that were possible. "I'm the one who has been terribly selfish. I was so obsessed with my own feelings that I never considered what my actions were doing to you, or to Nessie."
"Edward, Jake would –"
Edward silenced me with a kiss. I threw my arms around his neck and returned the kiss in kind, my body feeling as though we had been apart for weeks rather than hours. He was the one to break the kiss.
"Bella, I know that Jacob would never hurt Nessie. And I am sorry. I told you, long ago, that I would never let Jacob Black come between us again. So, I am sorry for breaking my word. And I have apologised to Nessie, for all the hurt I have caused her with my rules."
I pulled him over to the bed, and sat on his lap, with his arms wrapped tightly around me.
"What made you change your mind?"
"It was when you reminded me of my original...feelings towards her. You reminded me that I didn't want my daughter, in the beginning, something which I have been repenting for every day since she was born. But, when you walked away from me, it made me realise that, as much as I was unwilling to allow Jacob to marry my daughter, I was even more unwilling to let you walk away from me like that. The pain it caused me when you ran from me...it was unbearable."
"It was for me, too," I nodded in agreement, pushing myself closer to him, as though I was afraid that he would disappear.
"I love you, Bella. And I don't want anything to ever come between us like this ever again."
"I love you, too." I started to utter my apologies for yelling at him, but he put a finger to my lips.
"I love you," he barely whispered it this time, bringing his lips to meet mine.