Teh Story By: DragonFoxAngel92
Naruto pondered around in his room. He couldn't stop thinking about the words Gaara had told him the other day. "Naruto… I want… to talk… Meet me in THAT alley tomorrow…" He glanced at the clock then let out a big heavy sigh. "Three o' clock huh… I've been up all night. I better get some sleep." With a yawn, the young Konoha ninja collapsed on the floor and snored away.
The next morning he awoke to the sound of one of Hokage-sama's trainee messenger birds crashing into his window. Naruto stood up with a groan. "Darn birds." Standing there for a couple of minutes, he didn't notice that it was three hours past his meeting time. It wasn't too long until he shot back into reality. ""Whaaaaat?! It's ten o' clock already?!" In a rush now, Naruto quickly changed in a matter of seconds. Not bothering to brush his teeth, he tossed a month-old mint gummy into his mouth and chewed on it. Surprisingly, it still had some flavor despite having it laid on his top drawer for so many days along with other expired snacks.
Jumping out his window, Naruto was soon found leaping swiftly from one roof to the next. The villagers didn't bother questioning him; they were used to it by now. Shikamaru was gazing at the clouds as usual and spotted Naruto flying by. "Hmph.. He's probably being chased by another angry mob of women. Tenth time this week." Chouji, who was sitting next to Shikamaru, was munching on a bag of potato chips. "Come on Shikamaru, you're always complaining about your life. Why don't we get some excitement in like Naruto? …It might be pretty fun sneaking into the ladies' hot springs. With a mischievous grin, Chouji paused for a moment and waited for a reply. "Heh, like that will ever happen."
At the speed Naruto was going at, it didn't take long for him to reach his destination. He jumped down from the roof and clumsily landed in the dark alley. "Geez, this of all places… I barely see anyone coming here – it's ancient!" With a rough sigh, the orange ninja rushed down deeper into the half lit alley, hoping that he wasn't too late. With an abrupt stop, he felt his heart skip a beat as Gaara appeared out of nowhere. "Whoa Gaara, don't scare me like that!" There was no reply. "Gaara? Uh, well, yeah. I only came because I uh… … " "…Naruto." Gaara's tone was as indescribable as always and his face, dead serious. "Y-yes?" Gaara walked closer and closer towards Naruto. With every step he took, Naruto took a step back. Eventually, he could no longer run and now his back was against the cold stony wall. Gaara closed in on him and his face was only inches away from the frightened ninja. "…Naruto." "Gaara what do you want? What are you doing?!" "…Naruto..?" "..Yes?" Naruto replied cautiously. "I want ice cream. Give me ice cream… NOW." A puzzled look swept onto Naruto's face. "Ice cream..?" "..Yes. Ice cream, a teapot, and.. a churro." "What?" "You owe me." "I do?" "At the chuunin exams, I was watching a match… I was also eating ice cream." "What flavor?" "Chocolate. Yes… Chocolate. It was good too. ..And holding that cone wasn't easy you know." "I still don't get it." Naruto said blankly." "You owe me. You see… I was going to take a bite out of it.. Until you came and bumped into me. And then… And… then.." "And then…" Naruto continued. "…It died." Naruto gasped and shock showered over him. "It did?! No… That can't be… ..Wait, ice cream can't die. ..Can it..?" "The head fell off. And it's all your fault!!" Gaara was in rage now, but he managed to control his anger. "Oh uh.. I'll… I'll buy you more ice cream.. Yeah, that's it! I'll buy you more ice cream! Problem solved!" Naruto smiled and struggled to show a "thumbs up" hand sign. Gaara was still so close to him that he could hardly breathe. "What about the teapot and the churro? I don't think I remember killing a teapot. Er.. or a churro." "Give them back to me." "Why?" "Because I said so."
It was then suddenly that a figure dropped out from the sky. "Leave Naruto alone!" "You!" Gaara shouted in a horrified tone. "Leaf whirlwind kick!" With blinding speed, the boy smacked Gaara right in the face and landed skillfully next to Naruto. "Yes, it is I, Rock Lee! Victory goes to spandex tights once again!" Lee boasted as he laughed hysterically. There was a long moment of silence until it was broken by a blue ninja flying in. His scream was fierce and very angry. "ROCK LEE!! GIVE ME BACK MY SPANDEX TIGHTS!" Naruto was shocked. Is this for real?! Why is HE here?! And… uh.. Spandex tights..? "SASUKE! What are you doing here?!" "NARUTO?!" "SASUKE?!" "NARUTO!!" "SASUKE!!" "NARUTO!" "LEE!" All eyes turned to Lee. "No one asked you." Sasuke said with a glare. "Uh… Sasuke?" Naruto asked as Gaara slowly backed away. I am invisible. Heehee... "Yes Naruto?" Sasuke answered. "You wear spandex tights?" "I – uh.." Sasuke hesitated. "In that case, I found a bunch. I found a trail of green spandex tights leading to Ichiraku Ramen the other day." Sasuke hesitated once more. I can't tell him that Itachi fears teh spandex-ness. If he touches it, he'll melt to the ground… And I'll have my revenge… And I'll finally get back my gamecube and Pretty Pretty Princess toy set… I heard Naruto likes Pretty Pretty Princess too… NO! No, I can't tell him. I'M going to be teh prettiest of them all! And the fangirls will be all over me! Mwahahahaha! "Uh… Sasuke, are you ok? You're face is unusually ding dong lalala today." Sasuke suddenly snapped out of his fantasy. "What?" "I said.. You're unusually ding dong lalala today." "Wha-" Before Sasuke could continue, he was cut off by a thrilling manly scream. "Youth!" With a quick scoop, the manly shinobi took both Naruto and Sasuke in one arm, then charged towards Lee and Gaara, who were caught off guard while discussing peanut butter issues. The shinobi grabbed them as well, then charged off in a blink of an eye. The ninjas were going so fast, that they couldn't see where they were going. Suddenly, things started to slow down, and before they knew it, they were all sitting in chairs.
Naruto looked around confused until something caught his eyes. "Ah! A can of chopsticks and.. Mmmm that smell! Ichiraku Ramen!" Sasuke sighed, Lee and the manly shinobi who turned out to be Gai, glomped happily, and the only reply that came from Gaara was "Churro…" In the end, Gaara found out that Naruto had already destroyed the village's ice cream shop while escaping from an angry mob of women, so he forced him to buy ramen. Naruto bought him the Ultimate House Special, so he was no broke. Lee and Gai challenged each other to a youth contest and sat in a dark corner trying not to age. And Sasuke… He found all the spandex tights lying around, melted Itachi, became teh prettiest of em all, and as he suspected, fangirls went crazy. Too crazy. They glomped Sasuke so much that he melted too. Chouji on the other hand, became inspired and followed in Naruto's footsteps. He was so good at his job that he became the next Naruto, but apparently the viewers got angry and melted him as well. Shikamaru, who saw all the action, gave a heavy sigh. "What a drag… What kind of story ends like this?" "…A messed up one." Kon replied. Shikamaru twitched as he saw the stuffed toy talking. "I'M NOT A TOY!" Er.. …As he saw the macho super fantastic all powerful mighty Kon talking. "That's more like it." Kon said with a satisfied nod. "…I'm not even going to ask." Shikamaru said. With a yawn, he turned over and dozed off, snoozing into his own little world, and hopefully not mine.
The Ennnnnnnd-ah!