Author's Comment: It's been a while since I wrote anything _...no writer's block, just plain procrastinating lazy to type up the words echoing in my mind. I got into Fairy Tail about a month ago and heck I don't know how or why I missed it O_O! I was a fan of Hiro Mashima's Rave Master, and Fairy Tail is so good as well.
Italics for the past memories and thoughts.
This ficlet was inspired by Chapter 163: The Scarlet Sky.
Gone
"What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet."
Romeo and Juliet (II,ii,1-2)
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"Erza...Scarlet." Her name never sounded so beautiful to her ears.
The boy who called himself Jellal smiled proudly at his genius idea.
"It's the colour of your hair. That way I'll never forget it."
Erza felt her heart swell up with a small joy and smiled in return. She would not have to endure the slavery alone.
Jellal willingly accepted his sentence of eternal punishment and departed without so much looking back at those he would leave behind. It was okay. His sins were not something that could be accounted and forgiven for. As expected, the Magic Council would not think twice about being lenient towards his betrayal. Not even in a lifetime could he expect to repay for the calamity he brought forth. Jellal kept his eyes fixated to the ground he tread on, not wanting to take even a tiny glimpse back at the members of Fairy Tail. Just what sort of connection and history did he have with Fairy Tail? He'll have all the time in the world to recollect his thoughts and recover his memory in the anti-magic confinement cell specially prepared for him. Jellal felt only a single sadness in his heart. Now if only he could remember a bit more about Erza, whose very existence and name gave him a sense of warmth and hope - and a reason to right his wrongs. Whoever she was, he would never forget the short time he spent with her. Without a doubt, he would spend the rest of his days alone thinking about the scarlet-haired beauty. A quiet thanks was all he could offer to console her.
The scarlet-haired swordswoman could only stand her ground and clench her fists in a fury of bottled emotions as she watched her comrades fight on behalf of her screaming heart. They knew without her speaking only wish, her only desire. Natsu had started the chaotic rampage and Grey joined him shortly after. Her nakama were full on fighting their way through the Council military troops to free Jellal in attempts to vanquish all the doubts in her heart. Erza knew that she had to save Jellal from a life of self-remorse, but to defy the Council's orders meant putting Fairy Tail higher up on the disband list. Obviously the guild was more precious to her than Jellal, or was it? Right now, her guildmates were fighting for him. She had to make her decision - to save Jellal from a sentence of darkness or to save her nakama from getting arrested for obstructing the Council. She felt her body quiver with hesitation as she weighted her options. It was very obvious that her companions weren't going to back down for her sake.
"You mustn't be taken away from Erza! You must stay by her side!" Natsu roared out amidst the chaos. He roughly shoved the soldier's head aside to snatch a look at Jellal. "For Erza's sake! Come with us!"
Jellal stopped dead in his tracks. For Erza's sake? Could he really stay by her side even after all the pain and suffering he brought upon her? He was sure he had inflicted more than just emotional scars on her heart. What value did he have in her life? What was his existence worth to her? How important was he to her past? His memories told him nothing, but he knew he wanted a future with her in them. He wanted to hold those hands which brimmed with warmth and comfort even after holding the cold steel of a thousand swords. Jellal thought logically for a moment. He had to atone for his crime and give himself up before he ended up dragging others along with him. He would not allow Erza and her friends be put in prison for his sake.
"That's enough! Stop this!" Erza commanded from the top of her lungs.
Everyone stopped at her resolute order. A silence fell over the battlefield as everyone refocused their attention to Erza. Jellal let out a small sigh of relief, his conflicting feelings came to a halt.
"You may...take Jellal away..."
Erza bit her lips and restrained any tears from pooling in her eyes. She cast a solemn look down as to not betray her feelings. This was it. They were going to be apart forever this time. Jellal would be really gone.
It was just a small spark of a revelation. It suddenly clicked - her name. Jellal was stunned at the sudden flashback in his memory. How had he forgotten such a simple thing?
"Of course."
Jellal's voice could be heard across the battlefield over the silence.
"The colour of your hair."
He turned his head to find Erza and give her a small smile to let her know that he remembered her. It was perhaps the only consolation he could part her with. Their eyes met for merely five seconds. Erza's eyes widened in surprise and he took in the sight of her scarlet hair blowing in the wind. It was a magnificent colour and it suited her knightly character perfectly. Her strength lay in her heart and not merely in her swords. Scarlet was the colour of her hair - rich and deep, like blood the essence of life. Remembering her name triggered unknown feelings lost to him. Jellal didn't fully know why, but he knew that Erza held an undeniably precious existence in his life. He could not conclude it as love, though it might as well have been because it pained him deeply at the thought of never being able to see her again. For her sake, for the sake of remembering their lost bond, he would be willing to endure his lifetime imprisonment.
"Farewell, Erza."
Jellal resigned himself to fate. He took a step into the unwelcoming jail vehicle and watched the light behind him slowly dissipate into the darkness. He heard her voice as the doors closed.
"Farewell."
Jellal was the boy who shone a warm light to those around him back in the slave encampment. He was so kind and caring to others. He had given her the courage to fight against the odds and break the chains of captivity. He was the reason she was who she was today. Erza bit her lips tightly and clenched her fists bitterly as she watched the Council depart with Jellal in their hands. She quietly retreated from her nakama as soon as they disappeared over the horizon. She could not bear to share her restrained tears with everyone. She walked amongst the wreckage and crumbled ruins until she felt her heart give way. Her tears ran sloppily down her cheeks, blurring the scenery around her.
He was gone. The Jellal she had been searching for, hoping for was gone. He finally woke up from his nightmare of chasing after Zeref and now he had to enter another one. Erza helplessly hugged her knees, trying to hide her weakness. So many years of fighting and getting stronger amounted to this grieving separation. She had always believed that there was a chance to save Jellal and now it was gone. She would never be able to see him again. All she had left were memories.
"I'm Erza, just Erza," she introduced herself shyly to the other boy with blue hair named Jellal Fernandes.
"That's sad," he replied. He proceeded to pull at her hair with a soft tug.
"H...Hey!" Erza felt annoyed. What was he thinking?
"Such beautiful scarlet hair...that's it!" Jellal beamed a wide smile. "Why don't we call you 'Erza Scarlet'?"
"Erza...Scarlet..." She really liked the sound of her new name. There was a warm ring to it.
It was just a name. It shouldn't have meant too much, but it did. That colour expressed a multitude of emotions she had come to feel in her life. Scarlet was meant for her and he was the one who taught her the meaning of the word.
"It's the colour of your hair. That way, I'll never forget it!" Jellal happily declared.
"Jellal..." Erza murmured his name into the empty air.
She would never be able to call out to him ever again. Her dam of tears broke loose, staining her face, her hands, her clothes with an torrent of sorrow and heartache. Her chest heaved hard and violently with each scream. She cried out without restraint, cracking her voice repeatedly. This was no nightmare, just the bitter reality of coming to terms with Jellal being gone for good. The pain crushed what little sanity and reason that still lingered.
She didn't notice the crimson sunrise dyeing the sky in a passionate sea of scarlet that day. It was lighting up another day for the scarlet knight, beckoning her to look up and see the beauty reflected in her hair.
Erza Scarlet was her name. She would never give it up. There was no other name for her. Even if he was gone, it bound her to him until death descended upon them both.
What traces of him would be left for her to remember him by, Jellal wondered. Could he stay in her memories forever? Aside from her, he probably didn't have an existence anywhere else. He leaned back against the freezing magically enchanted stone wall of his confinement. She was gone, but he would remember her name with him to his last days. After all, it was the only thing that brought light and warmth in his darkness.
Scarlet...the colour of your hair...that way, I'll never forget it.
He smiled at the little memory.
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Fanart for this ficlet
mamoruawayuki DOT deviantart DOT com/#/d4ft08p
Author's notes: I almost cried buckets when I was reading this chapter and hit the centerpage with Erza hugging her knees, sitting on the ground. Frankly, I thought that was one of the most beautifully drawn scene to represent heartache and sadness I've seen in a long time. There were no words, but they weren't necessary to convey the mangaka's intent. Needless to say, that image practically burned itself into my memory and instigated the rampaging need to DRAW Fairy Tail. I was up past midnight sketching characters from memory and it's been a while since my mind has been consumed with the need to draw draw draw. I made a sketch of Erza walking by herself, with her swords staked into her surroundings. And in the sky, I sketched the back view of Jellal. I think I'll have to cough up a lung to ink and colour that sketch =_=.
Shakespeare's quote from Romeo and Juliet about 'what's in a name?' does have some significance to this ficlet. Normally, most people think of a name as something for others to call them by - nothing too special. And some people wished they had been given another name. Romeo didn't care for being a Montague. Is a name really that big of a deal? It sure as heck is! In Erza's case, just having Scarlet added created a whole new outlook for her. She was no longer plain Erza and it gave her a reason to love the colour of her hair. Sure, it's just a name, but it forever bound her to Jellal. As long as she was called Erza Scarlet, she would remember the one who named her.
My name is very precious to me because my parents went through a dictionary to find it, instead of letting my grandparents name me according to tradition. As I got older, I found out the meaning of my name and I find that it suits me perfectly. I am happy for my name.
I don't know if Erza loves Jellal and vice versa. All I know, based on Mashima's given hints thus far, is that they have a special bond with each other, one that can't be broken even if they are enemies. My opinion of Jellal is quite low actually because he was such a bastard villain, but it's improved somewhat now that he has regained his sanity. I'd like to see the two of them get together somehow, but Mashima's gonna have to pull a fat miracle to make the circumstances fit. ~sigh for painstakingly slow romances in shounen manga T-T~ Sometimes it feels like there's more romance in shounen manga than shoujo manga...especially in Mashima's case.
