No.1: How far we've come.
Your name is Dave Strider, and you are currently sitting on a rooftop with your brand new bro and a psycho troll girl, absent-mindedly sharpening your legendary piece of shit sword, waiting to fight two creatures basically equivalent to kind of rubbish gods. Despite their near omnipotence( and probably impotence too, wah-hey) you kind of have to beat them. Well, there's not really any kind of there, you need to beat them or the whole plan goes awry, world is destroyed, everyone dies. Just another day in the diary of Dave, you muse. Dirk's to your right, mimicking you as he drags a whetstone across his stupid anime katana. You could never get the hang of katana's, and you shift your longsword on your lap, turning it over to reach the other side better. Terezi's on your left, cane swords on the ground beside her, hands in her lap. At first you think she's meditating, but you hear the snoring and realize she's dead asleep. You give a chuckle, and Dirk looks up from his blade, brows rising. Neither of you are wearing your shades, giving you a full view of his bright orange eyes. You Striders have always had some weird characteristics. You dart your own, crimson eyes over to Terezi, and he follows your look, mouth curling up into a smile. He turns back and you share a look. His eyes darken, and you know what he's thinking. One or more of you, for all the laughter and preparation, might not make it out this alive. You know, cause you're thinking it too. You sit there for a second more, but then his eyes flit over your shoulder, and his face hardens. You turn as he reaches over and shakes Terezi's shoulder. You watch as a streak of rainbow light tears across the sky, coming to a stop in front of the skyscraper. Cradled within the light is one of your targets. Cloaked in velvet black, looking for all the world like an old, medieval style squire. Other than the metal spike that has replaced the bottom half of his left leg that is And the bloodied crowbar clutched in his hands. And the horrible lights in his eyes, flickering every colour of a pool ball as they stare down at you.
"Dave? The other one's here too" You risk a look over your shoulder to find...The same person, hovering in the air on the opposite side of the skyscraper, this one in a pitch black suit and wide brimmed hat, a patch over one eye and the other brimming with mechanical light, supported by a plume of fire from his feet. He too is missing one leg, and an arm too, cybernetic surrogates replacing lost limbs. In his hands are clutched a golden staff, topped by a glass globe full of clouds and stars. As you watch the staff morphs into a similarly golden assault rifle, and he slips the magazine out, and checks it's fully loaded before replacing it, and transforming it back. Seemingly satisfied with his weaponry, he jerks forward and the fire disappears, the concrete roof cracking as he strikes it. A thump reaches you, and you find the other has grounded too. His rainbow light is contained now he's not using it for flight. But only barely, his eyes still strobe, goddamn it's a good thing you're not epileptic, and sparks and lashes of energy ricochet from him, burning streaks across the roof as they earth themselves.
"Well, this doesn't look great" Dirk's dry tone makes you smile, in spite of the fact you might very well die in the next five minutes. You back away from technicolour douchboat, taking small steps until you come back to shoulder with Terezi. You raise your sword into a high stance, and turn to find her with both swords in hand. Her sharp teeth are bared, and crimson glasses shining in the dying daylight. Bro-Dirk's on the other side, his katana over his shoulder, his own pointy ass shades on. He looks back at you, and you decide you might as well join the fun. You flip your aviators down onto your own face, and you back up until the three of you are a triangle shape, blades on every side. Both Jacks ready their weapons, robo-Jack grinning, and the other screeching, rainbow light shuddering and spluttering. You share a final glance with your compatriots. Terezi smirks.
"You pansies ready?"
"As always" Dirk mutters.
You take a second to consider it. "Nope. I'm all up and shaking in my boots at just how unprepared I am" They snort, and you feel Dirk tap your arm.
"C'mon kid. You've been training all your life for this. We all have" He makes a fist, and you just have to bump knuckles as both Jacks spring to the attack.
"Well, let's see how far we've come"