Fieldtrip: Chapter 6 – Sleepless Night
After Zuko explained Toph he had planned for the ostrich horses to stand there and putting on some new clothes – luckily he'd brought some extra garments – they'd searched for a place to sleep. Eventually they'd found a cave and had tied the horses to a tree, being followed by dragging themselves to the cave, ready for some sleep.
The grass tickled his feet, especially his toes. Though the air was cold, he didn't mind sitting outside, looking up at the stars. A smile came to his face as he remembered Uncle saying that one who wasn't able to see the stars, was lost. It didn't matter if there were clouds blocking the view, someone who wasn't lost would always be able to see them. He was more than glad to be one of those persons.
He leaned backwards and let his back hit the ground softly, placing his hands beneath his head and pulling his legs out of their crossed composition. He sighed contently at the more comfortable position, his neck had started to hurt from looking up. Lying outstretched on the earth was way better for him. The view of the thousands of stars made him think about those times when he was lost and couldn't see a single one. That thought brought him to the question: How would it be if he couldn't see at all? He suddenly became worried about Toph, and to check if he hadn't woken her up, he turned onto his stomac, facing the entrance of the cave.
The only thing he saw was darkness, and just when he wanted to turn onto his back again, he meant to see something green. His heart almost stopped from the moment he realised it was his blind friend, who was probably watching him. She walked towards him in all silence, not even bothering to look at him. As she lay down next to him, she was pretty irritated. She felt his head moving towards her, meaning he was practically staring at her. Something she didn't like. She put her hands under her head as a cold breeze blew up her bangs and passed her arms, making her shiver. She was glad when she heard and felt Zuko turning onto his back as well, facing the sky again. She breathed in deeply, the fresh night air making her smile.
"Oh yeah," she said, breaking the silence, "This is it."
"This is what?"
"It."
The Firelord turned onto his side, facing the blind girl again.
"It meaning?"
The smile she gave him told him he wasn't going to find out. Or at least not from her.
"That's for you to figure out."
For some reason, he smiled back at her.
**
As they sat up straight in the grass – both with their legs crossed – they stared in front of them, both looking at nothing in particular. Zuko had been so kind to provide both of their bags with sleeping bags, he'd even went back to the cave to get them. And even though Toph couldn't see a thing now – unless she placed her hand on the ground – she
didn't yell at her travelling partner. Because she thought it was sweet. Not that she actually said such thing. Not out loud at least.
"Hey, Zuko?"
"Yeah?"
She swallowed nervously at the thought of what she was going to say. The reason why she was going to say it made her even more nervous.
"I-I'm sorry about... earlier." The silence told her to continue. "In the cave. I knew you had a scar and all," She heard his breath quickening. "But I just didn't know how big it
was and how it felt like." As secretly as she could, she placed a hand on the ground. "I'm sorry for reacting like that and all, I didn't-"
"It's okay."
She faced him, a frown on her face. "No, it's not. And you know it isn't."
Zuko sighed, holding the bridge of his nose. "Toph, I don't feel like having this conversation right now."
Toph looked away from him. "Fine."
**
He closed his eyes and shivered. He held his hands in front of him and blew on them, fire escaping from his lips. He smiled at the warmth before hiding his hands in his sleeping bag again, putting them on his arms again. When he noticed he wasn't the only one who was shivering, he looked at his side. He knew that asking the tiny girl if she was cold would only result in a loud no, so he wrenched himself out of his bag and started looking around for some wood, holding a flame in his hand.
At some particular part he was sure his friend wanted to ask what he was doing, or at least why he was doing it. Eventually, with a smug look on his face, he returned to her. Without saying a word, without even glancing at her, he kindly put down all the wood he'd collected in front of him, crouching as he did so. Nice and slowly, he removed some grass from around the wood, to prevent to set everything on fire. He didn't feel like making the same mistake as Toph had made. Then he got up straight again and breathed in deeply, closing his eyes. In a second his eyes opened again, pretty abruptly, and he punched his fist forward, setting the wood on fire. Zuko smiled at his creation and remembered that even though the movement was rough and hard, the fire didn't feel as hot and angry as it used to, when he was different. Bad.
"Better?" he asked, glancing over his shoulder at Toph.
The smile on her face told him it was better indeed, and for once she didn't look like she was going to offend him with one of her always accurate insults. He hoped that now was the chance to see the girl behind Toph, the sensitive and kind side behind that rough shelter of sarcastic comments. And maybe, who knew, he would show his own sensitive side to her. Maybe. That was good enough for him.
**
She had finally taken the courage to turn to him, only now did she lack the courage to face him, even if it wouldn't make any difference. Now he was just staring at her – probably – and waiting for her to say something. After she'd faced him of course. Which would take her a long time, according to her then. Maybe she needed to open up to him, if only a bit, and show him her kind side? Her sensitive side? And, who knew, maybe he would show his too. Not that that was important. Although, she would like to meet the Zuko behind the layer of anger and frustration. The entire gang probably would.
She sighed to herself. Having to face Zuko was going to be the first step to get closer to her goal, and if she didn't take the first step, no other steps would be followed. So, eventually, she lifted her head and pointed her eyes to where she thought his were. And even though she couldn't feel him doing anything, she did feel his eyes on her. And she didn't mind. She even smiled.
"The Blue Spirit."
Toph blinked a few times to figure out the words that had just been said. She hadn't expected him to talk, or at least not before her. After she'd figured out the words, she still didn't know what they meant. Or what he meant with them, why he said those words. Her confusion seemed to amuse him, he chuckled. The way he chuckled was kinda cute, very unlike him, but cute.
"You're way to be free is – or was – becoming The Blind Bandit, as you told me this noon."
He paused, probably thinking, just like her, that 'this noon' seemed so long ago already. It felt more like those peaceful times, or whatever they had to be called, seemed to have passed days ago.
"My way was becoming The Blue Spirit. I wore a blue mask and black, tight clothes, so sneaking would be easier."
"You snuck?" the blind girl asked, grinning.
"Yeah." He sounded happy. "The first time I became him I saved Aang." He paused again, thinking over what he'd just said. Then, he laughed softly, placing his hand on his
forehead. "That was probably the first good thing I'd done in years."
"Why did you save him?"
He didn't respond, stayed quiet. Eventually, after being silent for a long time, he sighed. "So I could regain my honour. Look," he said, not giving her a chance to reply, "I did some bad things that I'm not proud of, and I wouldn't want you to know all about it."
"Why not?"
"Because you're the only one who trusted me since the beginning."
**
Since it had been getting colder and colder, and almost unbearable to stay out, they'd decided to get closer. Literally this time. For Toph, things got warmer immediately. She'd heard about how warm firebenders were, but had never believed it until she'd experienced it. She simply enjoyed the Firelord's warmth.
"So you and Sokka are pretty close, huh?"
The corners of her mouth went from up to down as confusion and surprise – especially surprise – took over.
"What do you mean with that?"
Instead of shoving away from him, she just kept sitting where she sat and placed her head against what was probably his arm. A small smile came to her lips.
He shrugged. "I don't know."
"Then why do you ask?"
She loved to find out her teasing voice hadn't disappeared.
"Because I thought so. You two are always together, whether you're pranking someone or just relaxing. Whenever I'm searching for Sokka I find you too and whenever I'm
searching for you, well, I guess you know what I want to say."
"Yeah," she replied somewhat dreamily, "We are pretty much always together."
"But I've noticed that's only the case when Suki's not there." Zuko continued, as if he ignored Toph. "Because when she's back with Sokka, you two barely seem friends."
"Yeah, well..." She shifted a bit, she didn't like where the conversation was going to at all. "I guess I'm just such a good friend that I wanna leave those lovebirds by
themselves."
When she heard soft laughter, she removed her head from his arm and faced him, a frown on her face. What was so funny? And why was whatever it was so funny anyway? He wasn't allowed to laugh with her. No one was.
"I'm sorry," she heard him say through his laughter, "It's just that you're an awful liar."
Toph stood up straight into her sleeping bag that was closed uptil her neck and put her hands in her sides, not realizing the funny view she was creating. According to the
scarred teenager – or anyone – she looked kind of cute.
"Excuse me?" the blind girl said, sounding insulted. "I'm not a bad liar!"
"Oh, so I have to believe you really want Sokka and Suki to go off by themselves? Couldn't it be that you, I don't know, don't like Suki?"
"What??"
She didn't know what she was the angriest about the most: The fact that he was right or the fact that he had figured it out in a few months and Sokka still hadn't reached that point.
"What?"
The innocence in his voice made her even angrier, he could count himself lucky. If she wouldn't have been standing in a sleeping bag which made her incapable of seeing Zuko would've been flying through the air right then.
"Am I wrong?" Toph opened her mouth to tell him that he was indeed, but no sound seemed to come from her. "You look good standing like that, you know."
The next thing she did was grumbling and talking to herself, just loud enough for him to hear. She called him Firelord Sing-A-Song and Crybaby and Mister Know-It-All, but she knew all too well that no matter how much names she would give him to insult him, it would not make the feeling of losing go away.
**
"Even if I don't like Suki, and I say if," she suddenly started, "I still would want those two to have their time. You know why?"
He shrugged lightly, feeling himself falling asleep very slowly. "Tell me."
"Because Sokka's my best friend."
Zuko seemed to be more awake than ever after hearing what she'd just said. His eyes were wide open in less than a second and he sat up straight, making his friend fall over onto her back.
"Ouch! Hey, what do you think you're doing??"
He looked behind him with a confused look on his face, as if he'd left the world for a moment.
"Oh, sorry," he said, still confused, "I just never thought of you two as best friends."
"What?" Toph got up and rubbed her back, a painful look on her features. "Why not?"
"Well..." The Firelord placed a hand in his neck, feeling as awkward as ever. "I always saw you two as... more."
The blind earthbender almost choked as her eyes widened. Then she turned pale – paler than she already was. Zuko looked at her, and when he saw her expression, he got scared.
"Uh, Toph?" He waved with his hand in front of her eyes. "Hello? Toph?" He stopped waving, realizing that wouldn't help anyway. Instead, he decided to hit the ground with
his fist, softly. "Are you there? Toph?"
Before he knew it all too well, Toph suddenly wrapped her arms around his neck, jumping partially out of her sleeping bag to do so. From the moment he'd figured out what was happening, he was still confused. First she seemed to be dead and then, suddenly, she hugged him. Tightly. Very tightly.
"Thank you." she whispered, leaving him with nothing more than a second ago.
He patted her on the back and attempted a smile. "Uh... You're welcome?"
**
He didn't know when or how, but somehow at some time someone must've brought him back into the cave, since he woke up there. The sunlight hurt his eyes more than he thought they would, and his head felt like falling off. When he couldn't find his blind friend anywhere he quickly ran out of the cave. Or at least he tried to. He fell down onto his stomac after trying to take one step. He couldn't believe he'd forgotten he was lying in his sleeping bag, something a Firelord was supposed to remember. The loud and amused laughter that echoed through the cave made him look up at the entrance to find Toph standing there, her arms crossed and her shoulders moving up and down fastly.
"In case you're wondering," she said after laughing, "I dragged you inhere." She paused. And grinned. "And boy, you are pretty, how do I say it? Sizeable."
"I have been eating much lately..." Zuko replied with a wide smile on his face.
"Come on, Sludgy, we're off."
He crawled out of his sleeping bag, very slowly, and cleaned his clothes a bit. He rolled up his bag and pushed it in his backpack before turning around to his friend again and throwing his bag onto his shoulder. Then he started to realize what she'd just said.
"Off where to?"
Toph rolled her eyes. "My parents?"
"Oh, ri-" The look on the girl's face made him stop right away. "You're planning on doing something else first, aren't you?"
"We're finally on a fieldtrip together, so I figured having fun won't hurt us, right?"
For some reason, probably because he was talking to Toph, Zuko didn't trust what was going on at all.
To Be Continued