It's 11:57 PM. I'm sick, bored, dehydrated, and I've always wanted to write a fan fic of anything, and this particular one shot is my first one. I'd appreciate any constructive criticism, but flamers, be gone!

Cowboy Bebop and the song, "My Funny Valentine" don't belong to me, but Tom Felding does. Ha ha.

Enjoy.

My Funny Valentine

"Another day, another bounty lost," muttered Spike as he slipped a cigarette in between his lips and lit it. Apparently the guy Jet set him up with was small fry. Real small fry. "A measly 50 woolongs," he scoffed making his way to the Swordfish, kicking a lone can out of sheer boredom. As he piloted, he fumbled with the radio, searching for something to ease the eerie silence he didn't want to face on his way home. Station 101.1. Static. Station 102.5. Static. Station 103.4. "STATIC!" Spike grumbled, irritated. He had almost yanked the knob off, but it eased onto Station 105.3. Surprise masked his face, but he finally relaxed. "Thanks for listening to 105.3, the station with all the hits. This is Tom Felding on the air, with a song for all you cool cats out there. It's one of my favorite old, old, old, oldies!"

My funny valentine

Spike chuckled, slightly amused. "Greeeat. There's actually a song out there that reminds me of the shrew."

Sweet comic valentine

"I wouldn't call her sweet, but she's comic alright. Fun to laugh at, not with."

You make me smile with my heart

"Nah… Only one woman can make me do that…" he continued to muse.

Your looks are laughable

"That's for sure."

Unphotographable

"Ditto."

Yet you're my favorite work of art

"Work of art? Maybe. Like some deformed Picasso painting. Ha ha ha!"

Is your figure less than Greek?

"Nah. Her figure resembles more of a porn star's."

Is your mouth a little weak?

"Are you kidding me?"

When you open it to speak,
Are you smart?

"So far, haven't heard an intelligent thing yet." Spike grinned.

But don't change a hair for me

"Yeah, her hair's alright."

Not if you care for me
Stay little valentine stay

"I wouldn't mind if you left. The only problem is, you always come back!" he muttered as he put out the cigarette in the ash tray compartment. He could see the Bebop in the distance. "Home sweet home. On second thought, it's not really home, and it's not all that sweet," he thought, rubbing his chin, remembering the occupants of Bebop. Jet was alright, but the other three… "Ugh. Whatever."

Each day is Valentine's Day

Is your figure less than Greek?
Is your mouth a little weak?
When you open it to speak,
Are you smart?

But don't you change one hair for me
Not if you care for me
Stay little valentine stay
Each day is Valentine's Day

The song ended, and Spike sighed as he landed the Swordfish on the Bebop. He decided it wasn't healthy for him to be thinking too much of the shrew. It was seldom rare he ever thought of anything besides her. But it wouldn't kill him, and it was actually a good song. It was just, other than the "Valentine" part, the song didn't really suit Faye in the romantic sense. Still… it reminded him of her.

"Spike, how'd the bounty go?" Jet hollered from the kitchen as he heard the shaft open. The lanky muttered a "Hn." as he walked in. "That bad, huh?" Faye asked, sitting Indian style at the coffee table, playing solitaire. He smiled, watching her furrow her eyebrows in concentration. "Happy Valentine's Day, Faye." He walked past her. She looked at him confused. "It's not Valentine's Day…"