Although this fic is the sequel to Beyond Chaos, I opted for a slightly different structure. Instead of complete run-on chapters, my idea is to write 10 mini-episodes which still incorporate over-arching storylines. There are also a few cross-overs, but the FFVI cast star predominantly throughout.

All characters, places and references to the Final Fantasy series: Squaresoft/Square Enix

References to Setzer's savings: Borrowed from '2 Broke Girls!' (Please don't judge me...)

Anyway, enjoy!

A Monument To Some Existence

Celes, Locke, Terra, Edgar, Sabin and Setzer are treated to an exclusive screening of a 3-minute film based on their adventures. (I never liked the CGI end movie released for the PlayStation).

A SALLOW-SKINNED MAN adorned in a denim cap and overalls was standing outside Jidoor's one and only Auction House. A stiff moustache perched on his upper lip like a miniature, grey nail-brush. In his hands he carried what appeared to be a large cake tin forged from steel. He surveyed the small, eccentrically-dressed group that was amassing before him; his expression one of plaintive contemplation.

"You all here for the film?" he asked gruffly. With an enthusiastic affirmation from the crowd, the man turned and unbolted the door to the hall. The room itself was lit only by natural light, which was fading fast in the late afternoon. Chairs had been set out in neat rows, just as if there had actually been a sale on. A musty smell, not unlike the unpleasant aroma of ancient mothballs, assaulted the Returners' senses as they entered. Upon the stage, the denim-clad individual fiddled with a canvas screen and a projector, while an excited buzzing filled the rest of the hall. Having pulled the drapes closed over the Auction House's arched windows, the man straightened and faced his audience.

"So, this film comes courtesy of Squaresoft and is based on a true story," he read huskily from a tiny, white card. After he had finished explaining what exactly a film was and how the projector had travelled from a far more technologically-advanced realm than their own, the Returners relaxed back in their seats. A whirring noise began and, as if by magic (the only logical explanation), a series of flickering images danced across the screen. Gasps of awe arose at the over-the-top explosions and scenes of long, dramatic staring, all set to a stirring rendition of Aria di Mezzo Carattere. When the final shot of a blonde, sour-faced actress standing on a beach faded to black, the man strode forward and yanked the room's curtains open once more.

Edgar immediately leaned forward to glance at his brother, who was seated between Locke and Setzer. As he caught Sabin's eye, the King's mouth twitched in amusement.

"I'm not saying it was bad! Only… the actor they chose to play me wasn't nearly good-looking enough." Sabin laughed dryly.

"You're just saying that because the actor playing me was built like a tank." He squinted up at the canvas screen reflectively. "I don't think the film-maker quite understood the concept of the coin toss…" Celes, who had been scrutinising the shape of her mouth in a hand-held mirror, quickly dropped the artefact back in her bag.

"What do you mean?" she asked. Sabin slouched back in his seat, his broad arms tucked behind his head.

"Well, why would Edgar and I let the fate of our kingdom rest on a two-headed coin? Seems like a bit of a blunder to me!" He looked to his brother for affirmation, but instead found his twin's expression had twisted as though he had stubbed his toe on a blunt object. Celes pursed her lips.

"Are you sure about that, Sabin?"

"Please, I think I would've noticed if it'd had my face on one side and Edgar's on the other!" Setzer opened his mouth to contradict the monk, but was cut off by the sudden upstart of the King's raucous applause.

"What a show! What were everyone's favourite parts?" Edgar blurted out in a voice which did not quite match the wild stare of his eyes. Celes placed a firm grasp on his arm until the clapping slowed to complete stop. Setzer gruffly and purposefully cleared his throat.

"I loved the scene with me flying the Blackjack." He rose to his feet, withdrawing a handful of trick cards from the pocket of his grubby overcoat. "One minute I was at the wheel, then next – BAM!" He threw the stack at the back of the chair in front, where they clattered noisily to the floor. The denim-clad man, who had been not-so-subtly jangling his keys throughout the course of their conversation, clucked his tongue irritably. Celes exhaled loudly through her nose.

"Yes, if only they did that in real life. It could be quite useful, especially when they rest of us are fighting with actual weapons." Sabin lowered his arms, cracking his knuckles as Setzer ruefully collected his scattered cards.

"Relm used to carry a paintbrush…" the gambler muttered bitterly.

"I think Shadow's scene was cool too," Sabin continued, leaning back in his seat, "you know, the bit when he took on all those ghosts! He would've loved to see it. I can just picture his reaction." He pressed his hands over his forehead and mouth, then turned to stare dully at Locke.

"Oh, so he'd be over the moon then?" Sabin narrowed his eyes, then shook his head.

"No, no, that was him smiling!" He sighed, waving a hand over his face artistically. "It's all in the eyes."

"I hated it." Celes turned in astonishment to Terra, whose jaw was clenched with vehemence. As her eyelids fluttered closed, her hands curled into trembling fists. "They made me look so… so… evil!" Locke gently placed his hand against Terra's shuddering back.

"Terra, we know you're not evil. You were wearing a Slave Crown…" With a noisy gulp of air, Terra continued, her shrill voice rising through several octaves.

"Anyone who watches this will think I'm just awful! Every scene showed me riding Magitek armour and tr-trampling people!" Using the backrest of the chair in front, she dragged herself to her feet and stood staring at Celes with hostile, bloodshot eyes.

"You got to wear a beautiful dress… rescued from prison…" She gasped, her brittle voice cracking with emotion. "Flowers!" she managed in an ear-wrenching shriek. In the streets outside, several dogs howled in agreement. The old man had stopped ringing his keys by this point and was simply staring in amazement.

"Come on, Terra," Celes uttered in a hushed voice, "you've done so much good in the name of humanity. Remember that!" Terra's ragged breath caught in her throat.

"Well the film-maker obviously didn't!"

"Look Terra, at least you can leave Jidoor today and tell everyone that you've been in a real life film!" Locke clapped a firm hand on her back and offered her a roguish wink. Terra wiped her streaming eyes with a red sleeve and blinked at him mournfully. Of course she could say that. On the other hand, Locke had been portrayed by a pair of tanned, feminine arms and the mere back of a blonde head. An uncomfortable silence imposed itself upon the hall until, at long last, Celes spoke.

"I'm sorry, Locke, I know we only saw-"

"I was in a film!" the treasure-hunter cried out in glee. "I can't wait to tell my grandpa!"

"Right, you've had your three minutes of fame," came the old man's gruff voice. "Now beat it." He jangled his keys threateningly, as though to add relish to his words.

~̃*~*~̃

And so goes the tale of The Returners' one and only film premiere. The reel circulated in other realms of the universe with far superior technology, and proved thoroughly unremarkable. Later, when our heroes returned to The Falcon, they would find an ink-strewn note left by Ultros. The octopus, who had suffered dental disfiguration, second-degree burns and permanent facial scars at the hands of his allies, claimed that the injury of being excluded from the film premiere was too much to endure. From that day on, he swore almighty vengeance upon The Returners…

And an impeccably-timed threat it was too. Cid's Famous Fish Stew had been on the menu that very night.

Setzer's Airship Repair Fund: 0 gil