These are going to be a series of one shots (even if this reads a lot like a prologue). Inspired by an image from tumblr with different pics of Carla and Liam in the rain put together so who ever made that, this is all your fault. And if this makes no sense it should by the end of the next one.

All around the world was waking

She lingered in the car park for a long time before she could face him. Normally she hated to let him out of her sight after knowing what it was to be so truly without him. But the shock and guilt rendered her motionless against the elements. She could not face him, not when her self hatred was so fresh and made her so brittle.

The storm showed no sign of even slowing down but it didn't matter because she was already soaked through and her hands shook from more than cold as the lingering adrenaline left her system. The constant heaviness of the rain was enough to cover the way her heart slowed and ached. It would never be enough to wash all the pain away but it was enough to keep her sane when everything felt so impossibly raw.

If she could have melted into the night she would have finally given in and let herself disappear.

In the end he comes and finds her and it was like that impossible night in Los Angeles all over again. She does not think that any of it will ever feel real even as she yearns to accept his presence enough that she could take comfort and trust his devotion. He might have seen her from the tiny window in their almost grotty little hotel room and she shivers at the strange idea of him watching her.

And suddenly, as his arms wrap around her so all she can smell is him and the rain, her sharpest fear is that her failure will make him leave her bereft and alone all over again. She would not blame him for it this time because after everything she had done she did not deserve to have him.

After his 'death' it was as if he took a part of her with him and no matter what she did the emptiness ached and she could never fill it. She had told herself she was simply trying to move on, to live again when really she had chipped away at the parts of herself that caused the most pain. It wasn't till she saw the way he looked at her after his 'resurrection' that she saw how she had changed. She truly hated the person she was becoming and how just for a moment, hurt had flashed in his eyes like she was a stranger.

Part of her can't help but hate how he is the same man he had always been, the harder edges a little more visible but she had always known all of him, while she now felt like half a person.

He had knocked on her friend Susie's front door one sunny day as if it was a perfectly ordinary thing for a dead man to do. When she had fantasised about him coming back from the dead the moment was always bigger than and as brilliant as it was impossible.

The banality of the actual event made her untrusting of it, it made her laugh hysterically at the insanity of it all. Even now, after months of having him back she still questioned her sanity as he slept quietly besides her.

Once her head had hurt from crying too hard tears and her throat burned from screaming she had sat mutely and allowed him to explain how he had never actually died and why he had stayed away for so long, allowing her to believe the lie. Somehow that was easier and more forgivable than when it was her turn to explain she had married his 'murder' and selfishly run away once she discovered the truth.

And the details of his explanation had not truthfully matter to her when she could not comprehend any of the practical details. It took feeling his weight on top of her and inside her again for her to be able to breathe and finally start to believe that he really was her Liam.

"Come inside baby." He whispers close to her ear and closes her eyes and the anxiety melts just at the sound of him.