Author's Notes: I just made this out of boredom. I didn't even expect it to be this long. This is a one-shot, Draco-Herm pairing. Hehe, I just got tired of the Ron-Herm pairing for a moment, but I still fully support that pairing. I hope you enjoy this one. I really am not that good in creating romance fics, but I can only create fics under that genre. Hope you read and review this! ;-) And please also review my Ron-Herm fic, Shyness Is To Blame… Thank you! ;-)
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, or any of its characters and events.
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Why have I realized it too late? Yes, she is the most amazing girl I have ever known. Probably the only girl I have loved and will ever love like this. But I cannot love her; we are just very different persons. I am forbidden to love her; she cannot love me anymore as she loved me then.
She is not that exceptionally beautiful – in fact, you would only notice her because of the loads of books she always carried with her. Yet, her brown bushy hair seemed to me the most beautiful hair one can ever lay his eyes upon. I wonder how it would feel to stroke her soft locks again.
And then there are her eyes – her beautiful brown eyes. Well, some said that they are really not that beautiful, but for me, those were the most expressive eyes ever. Yes, I have learned to love them.
There were also some unique things in her that used to amaze and still amazes me – her bossiness, her cleverness, her compassion and many other things. I hated them at first, but as time went by I learned to accept every bit of her.
She was the perfect girl I used to dream of. We were actually perfect for each other – only, we could not love each other freely.
She used to love me, yes, and she might love me still, but what can one expect when I showed her my love completely when it was already too late? I did not show how I valued her then – I took her feelings for granted and threw insults at her instead of showing my affection which grew and still grows ever so strongly.
And now, I am looking back on our colorful but sad past. It has been full of sorrows and heartbreaks – and yet it is the major reason why I can still smile up to these days. She is the reason why my steel heart softened – her beautiful soul told me that I could change and live again.
And I love her so. Yes, I love her so.
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It was their last day at Hogwarts – the last day of their seventh year. Hermione slightly winced; the sunlight was hurting her eyes.
She was waiting for Draco Malfoy – yes, Draco Malfoy. Unlikely, was it not? Before, she used to feel pure hatred towards him, but that was before. Maybe some kind of magic had worked on her which made her fall for her archenemy head-over-heels. Yes, she fell in love with him.
"Where's Draco? The train will leave at any moment now," she told herself. She walked and walked until she caught a glimpse of a tall blonde boy – it was him.
Draco approached her. Odd though it might had seemed to others, he looked as if the whole world was on his shoulders – sadness, anxiety and pain were all obvious in his face.
"Let's go inside, we need to talk," he told her. Hermione followed her as he went inside the train.
Draco searched for an empty compartment and let Hermione in before he himself went inside.
He slid the door of the compartment and sat opposite Hermione to be face-to-face with her.
"What is it, Draco? Harry and Ron are waiting for me. You better hurry with your – "
"You'll stay here as long as I want you to. Look, Hermione, I know I've hurt you badly, and I want to say sorry. Will you forgive me?" Draco asked, staring intently at her. His grey eyes were so full of love that Hermione could not possibly show him how angry she really was for his betrayal.
"You're already forgiven, Draco, and you need not worry anymore, it's nothing to me," she lied. Draco was unconvinced.
"No, I know it's not just nothing to you. Look, I didn't mean to end up with her like that, I was drunk that night – "
"Say whatever you want to say, I saw it with my two eyes," said Hermione, trying to look unfeeling. Draco tried to explain.
"I didn't have a relationship with Cho, I never had. It was pure accident and – oh please understand me, I'm only human, she was the one who started it, I was drunk – "
"That's enough. Whatever you say, you have still fallen for her bait. And for you two to almost end up in bed! – oh, if I had not seen it, maybe you would not try to stop what she was doing," Hermione said tearfully. Draco did not like to see her crying.
"I thought you forgot her already, but I was wrong. Maybe you still loved her. And I'm such a moron to fall for your sweet lies," she added. Draco tried to protest but –
"Don't say anything, I've had enough. And please just let me be happy with Harry. He truly loves me and I could not possibly hurt him just like that. He promised me he has already forgotten Cho, unlike you who – "
"Let me speak, alright? I do not love Cho, I never did. And I promise you that what happened was pure accident. You believe in Harry for telling you that he has forgotten her already, now, please believe me that it is only you I have loved and still loves," he said, quite overwhelmed with his feelings. "Please come back to me."
Hermione felt that somehow what Draco was saying was true. She wanted to believe in him, but she could not afford to be hurt again. Her tears started to fall.
"Draco, you know we cannot be. We're two very different people. Your family cannot accept me, my friends cannot accept you," she explained.
Draco sighed, and then, surprisingly, a smile appeared across his face. It was a sad smile, though.
"You know what? I do not know what it was in you that made me fall so hard. For many years I kept what I feel because of fear of rejection and of many other circumstances."
Hermione began to smile, too. "Yeah, I felt the same. And I had a hard time choosing between you and Harry, you know," she said, still smiling, although sadness was obvious in every bit of her face.
Draco softly laughed. "Oh yes. I felt like I want to punch Potter every time I saw you with him. I said to myself, 'What's he doing with my girl? I can't let him have her, I love her' and then I would start feeling funny things. I have never known jealousy because of a girl before, you know. You were the first one to make me feel it," Draco said, smiling all the time, reminiscing how he had felt for her then.
Hermione laughed a bit. "Yeah, I also felt the same way whenever I saw you playing around with other girls," she admitted, blushing.
Draco sweetly smiled at her. "You know that they're just flings, don't you? And Cho is just one of them. Funny, isn't it? Before, Potter and I used to fight over her, but now we're fighting over you. We really are archrivals," said Draco. Hermione beautifully showed him her smile, flattered with what he said. Draco felt his heart jump.
"But you know what? If there would only be one girl I would fight for it would be you," he told her truthfully. Hermione, instead of being happy with this confession, looked saddened.
"Ours is a love that cannot be. However I want to love you, it's just so wrong," Hermione told him. Tears started to form in her eyes again.
Draco, for the second time, sighed. "Yeah, I know. If I can only change my fate. But I do not have control over my father. Still, whatever happens, I will love you until my heart gets tired of it. Sad to say, that would mean that I'll love you forever."
Hermione started to sob. "Oh Draco! If I can only love you freely. I love you so much, but we have to accept that we're not meant to be."
Hermione's last statement kept them silent for minutes. It was Draco who broke the silence.
"Yeah, I guess we can't stay like this. But, before we part, would one last kiss be - ?"
He did not have time to finish his speech anymore. Hermione kissed him on the lips. That was the last kiss they shared, and probably their very last kiss. She wanted him to remember it forever.
After some time, they parted. Draco hugged Hermione, and she accepted it.
"I believe in you now. I believe in your love. But I cannot believe in us in these circumstances."
Draco whispered softly in her ears. "No turning back now. But, as a last favor, please remember me this way, loving you, holding you, caressing you. I want you to be full of good memories alone," he said, his breath tingling Hermione's ears.
"Yes, I'll remember you this way," she answered.
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Well, sad, is it not? But even if we are apart, our hearts stay with one another. Forever.
Yes, she loved me then. And I love her so, still.