AUTHOR: Sara/ impressionablevixen
DISCLAIMER: Veronica Mars is Rob Thomas's creation not mine. Unfortunately.
RATING: PG13
SPOILERS: Up to 1x19 Hot Dogs.
Veronica leaned her head against the lifeguard stand and felt the grainy sand beneath her palms. She tilted her head back so that she was looking up into the fiery California sun.
She kept her eyes focused on the sun even past the burning and then the numbness. Heaven knows she would welcome blindness. As a photographer details were essential. And she couldn't get the details out of her mind.
Details etched in the faces of the people she cared about most. The trails of blood flowing from the wound on Lilly's head. The sight of her underwear on the ground mere feet from where her sore body lay. Her mom's haunted eyes after the reunion in Barstow. Duncan's face as he turned to her wondering if it was him she accused for the murder of his own sister.
Veronica thought herself lucky in one aspect. She couldn't see her own expressions. She pitied the person who saw the emotions strained across her face.
Before seeing the videotape of Logan's mother jumping off the bridge Veronica had envied him. He had gone through some of the same harsh, stabbing realities as her. But he hadn't witnessed them. He hadn't seen Lilly's bloody corpse and he hadn't seen the music box and note. He wasn't broken up with by the cold shoulder and a heart-wrenching dirty look. He kept his friends.
But in a matter of weeks Logan's life started to crash around him. At least for Veronica it happened over a period of months.
Now that she and Logan were embarking on a relationship Veronica couldn't help think how perfect it was. Symmetrical. Symmetrical miserableness and angst. Neither of them could claim to have gone through more pain than the other.
Veronica turned her face from the sun. She couldn't risk not being able to see the look on Lilly's murderer's face when the death penalty was said. Or the look on her rapist's face when she confronted him. Or the happy sight of her family sitting down to a dinner... just like they used to.
Things were about as bad as they could get. So Veronica sure as hell wasn't going to miss being able to see things when life turned around.