This is a random crack fic I came up with. FEEL THE POWER OF BOREDEM. Disclaimer: I do not own LOTR or DW or HP, but my sister has a sonic screwdriver.
Gandalf sat pondering how to open the gates of moria. Frodo was about to say something when a strange noise sounded along the lake. A big blue box appeared next to gandalf when a man in a fez, as well as two gingers, one a girl in her pajamas, the other a man in a roman outfit. Boromir quickly began to flirt with the girl as the man in a fez pushed gandalf into the blue box. The roman then stabbed boromir who being boromir didn't die and just stood there with the blade sticking out of his gut, the man in a fez then called the roman and the girl back into the blue box which teleported away. Pippin watched all of this and simply summed it up with "Now what?" "Ummm?" Merry awnswered, when suddenly a bunch of tenticles shot out of the water and ate them all.
Gandalf who had now gotton past the bigger on the inside thing was sent to meet Dumbledoor. They then started a old mans club and gained several other members, like Yoda, and a bunch of other old people in popular movies. They would take turns watching eachothers movies in the tardis and the docter eventually was forced to join by river who said he needed to "Socialize" more. This made the docter angry so he stole all the mens beard and tied river up with them.
The End
Or so you think.