Hey guys!
So something one of the writers said during the live tweet for the season finale jumped out at me. They basically said that Andy was with Luke because he was the on who asked, which got my writing muse jump started.
Hope you enjoy it! As always, please review. xx
Sometimes Andy truly, deeply hated Sam Swarek.
She hated how he acted like the night of the blackout meant nothing to him. She hated how he kept continually telling her how great a guy Luke was...as if she didn't already know.
She hated the way he made her feel when he looked at her with those dark, unreadable eyes, hated how guilty she always felt around him, because every day, every moment she spent with him meant she had cheated on Luke yet again. Not physically - no, their affair wasn't physical - but emotionally. She never felt more alive than when she was with him. She never told Luke the things she told her partner, never let her boyfriend see her vulnerability and fractured soul the way she let her training officer did. And she hated him for it.
But most of all, she hated that he didn't ask.
He was constantly asking her questions, constantly invading her privacy, but the one question she wanted him to ask, needed him to ask, never came. In fact, he didn't go near it with a ten foot pole.
If she really was honest with herself, the only reason she was with Luke was because he had asked, and Sam hadn't. And she knew that if Sam did ask, she would leave Luke in a heartbeat.
Maybe he didn't want to ask her, maybe he didn't want that kind of commitment. Maybe she was right, maybe he was the dangerous, bad type after all. She directed some of her hatred towards herself for thinking that.
The alcohol she was currently consuming wasn't helping her clarity, but she couldn't help it when her train of thought trailed elsewhere. Maybe the reason why he didn't ask was because he thought she didn't want him to.
It was an odd conundrum they were in, a sort of waltz or tango, (though a boxing fight would be a more appropriate description) regarding their current situation, because if he thought she didn't want him to ask, and she thought he didn't want to ask, then they would stay in the frustrating non relationship they were in at the moment.
And to be perfectly honest, she didn't know how much longer she could stand to be in it. She half considered going over to his house and finishing what they had started the night of the blackout, but she refrained, because deep down, she was terrified of the endless ways the situation could go.
So she would stay with Luke. Even after all that had happened between her and Sam. Even after she had almost lost him.
Because, after all, Luke was the one who had asked.
And Sam wasn't.