Hi, so I'm sorry I haven't updated my other fics recently, but I am hoping to get a chapter up for at least one of them by the end of the week.

Anyway, this is my first one-shot. I noticed there was nothing for Gail and Chris and I really liked Gail in the last episode. Spoiler alert for Takedown. I just started writing and this is what came out, so if it seems kind of like raw material that's because it is, but sometimes I think its better than trying to overdo something. So, please read and tell me what you think!

Disclaimer: I don't own Rookie Blue

Normally I am trying to impress everyone. To live up to and one day exceed the standards set for me, but, right now, my disheveled uniform and bloody hands were hardly noticed as I glanced at his pale, sweaty, heaving chest. I was trying to be strong. To remain calm so I could find a way out of this hell. I had already tried the door, but it was too solid and not even shooting the lock helped. I searched the room for any way to get out. I tried to avoid looking at him because even though he needs my help if I look at him and see the blood then I won't be able to stop myself from crying. If I was focused then maybe I wouldn't think about it. About how he was dying just a few feet away from me. About how if I hadn't been so eager to leave and hadn't treated this like a joke assignment then maybe this wouldn't have happened. He was dying and there was nothing I could do. All my training, all the family history, none of it mattered anymore. He was all that mattered to me and if I thought about how I might have to watch him die, how this might be the last time I can be near him and talk to him, how we ended things, if I thought too much then I wouldn't be able to hold it in. Tearing at the paneling around the window so that I could get out and get help so that everything would be okay. He would be fine. He will be okay. He will be fine. The mantra started in my head. It was all that was keeping me from breaking down.

The noise from the other room stopped me in my tracks. I watched, horrified, as the dealers came flooding in and filled the room right outside. As I turned to Chris, I realized for the first time the extent of my helplessness. I was almost numb as I climbed down from the window toward him. Before we were just stuck, but now we were completely trapped. There was no way for us to get out alive with those men outside.

I looked at Chris again. He was always following the rules. Always trying to be good. He was caring and compassionate. He deserved to live. I didn't. I was mean and cold to everyone because that was all I knew. My parents never told me they loved me. They supported me if that's what you call being sent to good schools, and they taught me everything they thought I needed to know to be just like them. I was following an order to do this job. Chris chose it and he was trying to help. He deserved a chance to live and I would do anything to give it to him. I was willing to do it. To climb through so I could call for help.

"I can-I can climb through that window."

"And get shot," he said, shaking his head no.

The fact that he was still trying to keep me safe even after I broke up with him, even after I failed to get him out of this damn room, and even as he was dying. I tried to explain it to him. Explain that his life was worth more than mine, but he wouldn't listen. Even now he was trying to take the blame, trying to make everything better. I sat, emotions deadened, next to him.

"I miss you," his softly spoken words pulled my eyes from the point on the floor.

I was so close, so close to really letting go as I revamped my mantra from before. This time out-loud as well, "You're going to be okay," I fought back the tears as I responded. I knew that if he was okay then maybe I would be too, "We're both going to be okay."

I knew that however selfish it might be I needed to be closer to him. To hold him because this might be my last chance. If he died and I never got to be near him then I wouldn't know what to do with my life. So, I had my arms around him and my head on his shoulder. He seemed light-headed and his body was seemed like it was getting colder, but then the sound of a SWAT team brought back hope. I don't think I could ever feel like that again. The hope that those harsh demanding cops outside, signaling just how close we were to being saved, brought me was so intense that I was no longer hungry or tired or worried. All I felt was relief and hope that he would be okay. That my mantra had pain off. That now everything would be okay and he could have what he deserved.

Then the shots rang out and I didn't even think. I just dove on top of him. There was no way I was going to let him get shot when we were so close to getting out. When the shots stopped and I got off of him, the look in his eyes told me that he really did care. He asked me if I was okay, desperately wanted an answer even as he continued to bleed. That was when it hit me. I realized that he really did miss me and I missed him too. That nothing that had happened with my brother's partner mattered. That this was about us and only us. I held him close to me. My blood soaked hands helping to stop the bleeding. He had lost a lot of blood, but help was here and everything was going to be okay. Legacy didn't matter, Chris and I could make our own. I didn't want to be the best cop or the perfect one anymore, I just wanted to be the one with him.

Thank you for reading! I'd love to know what you think of it.