Helpless
Why does this always happen to me? Why do I always get sent to strange worlds were everyone is crazy? Why do I always get possessed by psychotic freaks? Do I have some sort of mystical signal that attracts these things?
Once again I'm stuck in the ether. Darkness is closing in on me -but you get used to it after a while. I can see and hear everything that goes on but I can't control any of it and if anything else happens I think I'm going to go insane.
What I can't believe is that they haven't figured it out yet. They're supposed to be the best, right? Well, hello people! It's me, I'm evil! Sort of.
But the really scary part is my behaviour at the moment - they think it's me. Angel really thinks that I'd go behind his back with Connor? Just when I was starting to realise that I might like him as more then a friend? Does he think I'm that much of a bitch? I've changed since my days in sunnydale, I really have. I thought everyone knew that. If I was going to go with anyone it'd be Wes, or Gunn..... anyone would be better then Connor. His like a son to me. This whole thing is just sick and twisted and wrong. I'm trying not to think about it, but it's hard not to when you're watching yourself act this way all the time.
Angel has to realise soon. He'll realise it's not me and then he'll get me out of here and we can be together finally.
Cordelia watched helplessly as it continued the charade. She watched as her friends followed the fake visions blindly, trusting it. She watched as it convinced them they needed Angelus, as it stole Angel's soul. A silent sob escaped her lips as she watched Lilah being killed. God, you people are so stupid! She yelled, knowing they wouldn't hear her. It's been months and you still don't get it? If you don't do something now, it'll be too late!
She watched as the thing posing as her continued to control her life. Turning her friends against each other, fighting Willow. And what was happening to Connor…she couldn't bare it. Angel, I love you, she thought angrily as she watched that thing tell Connor he had to hide their baby from everyone.
I love Angel, she kept on reminding herself. And I know he still cares about me. Deep inside, I know he does. He'll save me eventually. It was after all, what heroes were supposed to do - help the damsel in distress. Help the helpless. And she was beyond that now.
When Angel finally did discover the truth, she felt like cheering - although she couldn't. Now all I have to do is wait, she thought happily. It won't be long now. Soon, everything will be back to normal...won't it?
The end