Title: While We Were Hunting Rabbits

Author: OpheliacAngel

Pairings: Asha/Max, past Max/Logan

Genres: Friendship/Romance

Rating: Teen

Summary: Max runs into Asha as she crosses the border into Canada, searching for Ames White. Asha tags along for a while, but when it's time for them to split up she has a thing or two to say.

A/N: Written for ShyWriter for Dark Angel Slash Exchange. Set post-series. So so so sorry for how late this is, I cannot apologize enough. Absolutely no need to write anything for me, I just wanted to give you this.

In the end, Logan wanted to go with her. Maybe it was because he could sense that she wasn't coming back.

She had been in Terminal City for three months now and already it was wearing away at her. This was what she was cut out for: leading, that's what they all told her, but in her heart it wasn't what she wanted. This wasn't the life she wanted. All she was doing was sitting there, hands under her ass, doing nothing. There was no way to go back to the world she knew, no way to get her people out of the city and live the normal life she's always wanted, the one that was ripped away from her.

The one that was never truly hers to begin with.

She didn't tell the others because they wouldn't understand, they'd beg her to stay, go after her. It wasn't just about getting away, she had to find him too. Ames White. The one who ruined all their lives. She didn't tell Logan this, but he knew it regardless. He knew her too well. Max hated asking him for a way out, a way to get into Canada, hated asking him to lie to everyone else, but if she knew one thing then it was that Logan would always have her back, even if he didn't want to.

They were both saying goodbye this time.

Max zipped up her jacket, adjusted its fur collar and trudged through the forest. She had ditched her motorbike five clicks back but she was sorely missing it now, the throb of the engine beneath her legs, the adrenaline rush, the power that she could do anything as long as she held on tight. Canada was freezing during this time of the year, but she wouldn't let the cold dissuade her. She was used to this temperature, had been trained to be, but it didn't mean she had to like it, or that it didn't bring back any unwanted memories.

Two hours later and she stumbled into a bar, choosing hot cocoa with extra milk over a mug of beer, which the few occupants were nursing despite the weather. She had felt rough all over for most of the day, hoped that seizures wouldn't make her day worse, but she knew better than to trudge on through and ignore her gut instinct. She ended up booking a room for the night just in case. Max hated to do it, it wasn't like Logan had had much cash to spare, he had already given her too much, but like she said, better to accept her body's faults rather than ignore them.

Ames White could have gotten all the way up to Alaska by this point, until she was able to kick her ass into gear and leave, but she couldn't let it bother her much. Chances were that he still had too much pride left to go running to the farthest hole. Chances were that he was still hanging around here, lying in wait to get rid of her for good.

The room was bare basics but it was cozy enough, she supposed. She kept one small bottle of overpriced milk in the mini fridge and spread out a map on her bed, trying to pinpoint best where White were to hide. The prolonged chill of the room got to her after a while, however, which apparently wasn't as warm as it should've been. She kicked the A/C unit but it wouldn't budge, thought about going to the front desk but thought better of it. It was bad enough sticking around here, even though the shaking was starting to become more pronounced, let alone striding back up to the main building and showing herself to the world all over again. Max had already paid up for two nights, might as well bunker down and enjoy them.

Eventually the shaking got worse, just her luck, and sleep was no longer an option.

She woke up to someone's fingers on her mouth, trying to pry something in between her lips. Her eyes shot open and she shoved herself up, slower than usual. Sheer instinct brought her leg up to kick the intruder off the bed and send her flying into the wall. Her balance was off though, she only succeeded in kicking them back onto the floor, nowhere near the wall. Max was still shaking, but her vision managed to clear up a bit, honing in on a very familiar face.

"Hey, Max. Don't freak out okay?"

Too late for that, Max thought, eyes narrowing at the blonde hair and the all too human figure crouching down in front of her, trying to pick up something up off the floor. Pills, Max realized. She recognized them too: Tryptophan.

Asha.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Max snarled, fists unclenching. "You realize I could've killed you right? Ever heard of knocking?"

Asha stood up, pills in her hand. Amazingly she offered them to Max, who snatched them and threw them down her throat. She knew better than to have a death wish as far as that was concerned. It was probably already too late, but she hoped they would at least take some of the edge off. Max scooted over, as much as she didn't want to, offering Asha a gesture of goodwill after she had been thoughtful enough to keep Tryptophan on her. But that didn't mean Max trusted her.

Asha sat down, giving Max a grateful smile. "I've been hanging around here for a while now. Found this nice little cabin in the woods, pretty cozy too." Max shot her a glare and Asha got with it. "I saw you come in last night, recognized the shaking. Logan mentioned something a while back about it, just a passing note, but I remembered. I figured you'd show up here eventually, Max. I started tracking White too, but the trail's been cold for a while now. Guess that's not gonna stop you."

Max crossed her arms. "So you just happened to keep Trytophan on you?"

"Yeah, well. Figured better safe than sorry. Hard to find, even harder to sell, so I just kept it." Asha ran her fingers through her hair. It was shorter now, Max realized, sharpened her features like the curve of her nose and dip of her lips. She looked thinner too. Max had always wondered where she had gotten to after the whole fiasco at Jam Pony. She had just disappeared, without a trace, but while Max knew it had bothered Logan she hadn't had much time to think about it.

"Logan's worried about you. Should've given him a call or something."

"Yeah," Asha sighed. "Truth be told, I should've done a lot of things, Max. But this is my life now."

She glanced around the room, then made for the mini-fridge and brought Max the bottle of milk. Max took it from her cold fingers and drank it down, wiping the remainder off on the back of her hand. "Thanks. Guess I owe you a pretty big favor."

Asha didn't say anything to that, just stuffed her hands in her jacket pockets. "Hey," she lit up, turning toward Max. "You could stay with me if you wanted? Place is big enough for six, let alone two." Max didn't think it was such a good idea, but she also didn't think hanging around here without backup was that great either. Plus, the milk was almost gone. "I have a couple gallons of milk in my fridge back at the cabin, just to sweeten the pot a little." As if Max's body wouldn't take no for an answer, it started to shake vehemently then. Asha took the bottle from her hand before she could drop it, positioning herself on the bed carefully should Max fall backwards. She felt like an invalid, her body betraying her, expecting her to trust Asha when she had just disappeared out of the blue, for no good reason. When Max knew next to nothing about her.

That's not true, a voice spoke in her head. She's helped Logan, which means she'll help you. If you just let her.

Max would've sighed, but her limbs were still locked in place and her body not hers to control and she had to concentrate more on not letting tears stream down her cheeks.

"Guess that's a yes then," Asha spoke above her, holding a warm cloth to her forehead. Max didn't know how much time had passed, but she guessed it was a few minutes rather than seconds, enough for Asha to get a washcloth.

Max's vulnerability then betrayed her. Her hand gripped Asha's arm, drawing her closer. If White were to find her now she would be dead. She thought before that she could handle this lone wolf routine again, she had been alone for such a long time before all this mess, but she started to realized then how much her friends had helped her since she had settled in Seattle. Since Cindy found out about her; since she and Logan started doing jobs together, falling in love in the process; since she met Joshua and Alec and Mole, who had believed in her. Who she betrayed, left, abandoned, just to go on her rampage of vengeance.

Asha had found her though, or she had found Asha.

"What do you need, Max?" Asha asked desperately. It hurt her because it was an echo of what Logan had once asked her, except Logan had been wheelchair-ridden and she had been on a couch and Logan had been much calmer about it, hand cupping her forehead. Asha was leaning over her, Max sprawled out on the bed, Asha's cold fingers brushing her hair back from her forehead, Asha's words panicked as if she wasn't as prepared as she had made herself out to be.

"Don't leave," Max whispered, keeping her voice low, hoping that Asha wouldn't hear her.

She hoped more that Asha would.

A bigger cabin was nice for a change.

Asha gave her pick of a bedroom when Max was feeling well enough to trudge through the woods again, Asha at her back as if worried someone would sneak up behind Max and clock her a good one, enough to scramble her head again. Asha seemed cold before, who knew how long she had stayed in Max's broken room? She seemed cold walking through the woods too, hands wrapped around her arms, continually adjusting her boots. Max couldn't imagine how the hell she managed to survive here for three months. It became more of a concern when Max accidentally picked Asha's room, not able to notice anything but the small closet which sadly held only an additional coat, which looked a helluva lot less thin than the jacket she was currently wearing.

The warmth in the cabin felt too good to her bones however. Max stretched her sore limbs and sprawled out on the bed, soaking up the warmth of the soft blanket beneath her. Asha hovered in the doorway, as if Max's pick of the rooms wasn't really literal. Max sat up, "I can move if you want me to?"

"Nah," Asha shook her head. "You look cozy right where you are."

I am, Max realized as she kicked off her boots. Her gaze traitorously brought her over to the closet again. "You have more clothes than that, right?"

Asha laughed, but that worried Max more than if she would have hung her head and cried. She never knew Asha much to begin with, but she remembered that she was tough, tough enough to stick with Logan while she was gone and handle anything. She was also quiet too, the last person to speak up unless it concerned someone else and not her. Someone who just kept her head down and suffered, for the good of all, as if no one cared about her.

Maybe Asha hung around waiting for Max because she was lonely.

It was a pretty far shot, but as Max took the opportunity while she almost felt like herself again to look Asha up and down, she realized how alone Asha must have truly felt these past few months. It was partly her fault since she could've stuck around Seattle and helped out, but if Max fully believed that then she was a hypocrite. She hadn't been able to stay in Seattle either, she had turned to the last person she wanted to turn to in order to get out.

Max figured that if Asha was letting her bunk here indefinitely, then the least she could do was give Asha some of Logan's cash to get her a warmer coat. For the time being, Max shrugged off her own coat and handed it to her. Asha shook her head, staring at Max incredulously as she slipped off her fur boots.

"Kinda impervious to cold, you know. For a long period of time, it's not good, but you're a human and the cold is seriously going to start screwing with you if you don't do something about it." Asha took the coat and boots then, hanging up her own coat in the closet. Max stared at her until she slipped it on and zipped it up, pointedly staring at Asha's bare feet next until she sighed and slipped on Max's boots. Everything seemed to be a good fit, and Max sunk back against the pillows, satisfied she had done something good today. Asha turned to leave, but Max couldn't help but stop her. "Hey, thanks and all. For letting me crash here." She wasn't much good with thank yous, but she was grateful when someone did something for her. "And for the bed," Max added, fluffing the pillows behind her and picking up the yellowed, used book on the nightstand.

"I'm just glad you finally decided to show up. It's good to see you, Max."

The first sentence would have made Max suspicious, but she could read Asha well with the last one. Asha might seem closed off to an outsider, but Max suspected she was more like her than she had ever guessed. She didn't close the door behind her, but Max had no need of privacy and she opened the book to the first page and started reading.

A few days of downtime, time to regroup, was exactly what she needed.

Max made sure she didn't overstay her welcome. After two days she felt good as new again, and decided that was as good a time as any to pick up White's trail again, even if Asha kept reminding her that it had gone cold. It was odd, but it seemed like Asha wanted her to stay. Max told herself she probably wasn't being as paranoid as she thought she was being. Asha had been waiting for her for months and had only just found her a couple of days ago, so it made sense that she didn't want to be left alone in the woods again.

But what did she expect? Max had come out here, left her friends, for the sole purpose of finding Ames White. It wasn't like she could stop now, wasn't like she could retire now.

"You sure you got enough milk, just in case?" Max shut the door of the mini-fridge and turned. Asha was half in the kitchen and half out, leaning against the wall that separated the kitchen from the spacious living room. Max had to admit, Asha had found good digs, but it didn't mean Max could hole up here for the rest of her life.

"Think I should be good." Asha was already getting too attached. She had to make a beeline now. "Well," she slipped on her new pair of boots, "don't want to overstay my welcome."

Asha blocked her from reaching the door. Max stared at her pointedly, not wanting to have to resort to glaring. It wasn't like she wanted to shove Asha out of the way, but she would if she had to. She should have expected that taking her offer would be too much of a risk.

"You could never overstay your welcome, Max." She bit her bottom lip, as if wanting to say something else and thinking better of it. Max wasn't one for games, they both knew this. So why was Asha even trying? "I… I've been alone for so long, I…." She tugged at her blonde hair and Max wanted to tell her to stop. "I guess what I'm saying is that I forgot what it was like to have someone in the room next to yours. To open the fridge and find your sandwich gone."

Max calmed considerably. "Yeah, sorry about that. I did replace it."

"Oh," Asha almost cut her off. "Yeah, I know. I wasn't blaming you. I just…."

"You should go to Terminal City, Asha," Max cut in. It was almost painful to see Asha stumbling over her words, as if Max was really making her that nervous. " They could use someone as resourceful as you."

Asha crossed her arms and straightened and Max had a feeling that she wouldn't stumble over her words anymore. It seemed like Max just pushed her who knew where. "And what about you? You seriously gonna do this on your own?"

"I don't have a choice."

Asha crowded her space. "But you do. Don't you see that? You can stay here or… or I can go with you." Max froze at that. What the hell was she supposed to say? If Asha went with her she might get killed, if Asha went with her then Max would have someone other than herself to worry about. If Asha was trying to get her to stay here then it wasn't going to work, because Max had come this far and she wasn't stopping now. But Asha… Asha didn't owe her anything, and there was no reason for her to want to go, to risk herself on a mission that might be suicide to her. "I can see you thinking it over. If you don't want me fine, but I've been waiting for this, Max."

It didn't all click into place at once, but some of it did.

Max had never looked at a woman like that before. Original Cindy had never put the moves - or whatever the hell you wanted to call them - on her. They were friends, they weren't like that. But Asha had never been a friend, not really, just almost, there in the background. More than acquaintances but not friends.

"You think too much, Max."

Asha's face appeared from beneath the covers. Her hair was sticking up in all directions and she made no attempt to smooth it down. She blinked sleepily up at Max, arms resting on Max's outstretched legs. The backseat of the car was cramped, barely enough space for the two of them, but they had made it work. Soon enough they would be back on the trail. Max scooted upward to pull her bra on properly and snap it closed, all while Asha continued to stare up at her. Max didn't feel the slightest bit self-conscious, even though she barely knew Asha and still wasn't sure what the hell she was doing.

Still, it was a beautiful morning as the sun came in through the fogged windows. Asha was beautiful too, spiked hair catching the light, hands shielding her eyes and mumbling as she curled back up underneath the covers. Max sat back, watching her every move.

It could work out just fine.

FIN