Two sides
By spy476
DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TRANSFORMERS!
First fanfiction so please go easy!
Will and Optimus
(I love this couple because they have so much in common that no one noticed it, especially after DOTM. And I thank PRIMESPARROW for writing that story from friends to mates for me. It got me writing this so please r/r and be gentle.)
Two sides
Colonel Lennox was a man who didn't like to back down or losing. He had the potential of a leader, staying brave, and having that courage that his soldiers honor and respect him for. But what none of the soldiers know that there was two sides of him. One was being that leader everyone knew, but when he's by himself he was a different person, he would feel either it was timid, anger, or even suicidal. He didn't need to worry about his wife or daughter finding out because they passed away while he was in Chicago, a decepticon went to his home and killed them. He did take it hard but he didn't want everyone to see him looking sad or depressed. Showing one side easily covering the hurt, then when the coast is clear he would let his that side out, the bravery, and courage would disappear and he would cry in silence, write something in his secret book he kept hidden, or cut himself letting the pain enter his body, and the blood seep out. He never told anyone about the stuff he does, not even Epps or Ironhide.
But there was something that kept Will from ending his life, whenever he heard this person's name, see the person, even if talk to this person his aching heart would heal the wounds. This person was Optimus Prime. There was something about the autobot leader that made Will feel safe and comfort, after the passing of his wife and daughter, along with Ironhide, Optimus was there. The two would go on drives, hang out, and other stuff. He even made Will live on base so he would be safe. Through it all it was official he started to develop feelings for the autobot leader. Optimus was Will's angel. He thought it was a good thing and yet a bad thing, what if Optimus didn't feel the same way, what if he laughs. More doubts filled Will's mind making him feel unwanted, and wanting to end all of this once and for all.
It was a late night at the base it was quiet with the decepticons not corrupting anything but NEST was ready if they decided to strike. Will was walking down the halls to his office, being lost in his reverie about ways Optimus would reject him. He feel his eyes becoming watery, he tilted his head back and blinked a few times, not letting any tears fall while he was in public. Will continued to his office he was walking by the autobot hanger (not so sure if it's called hanger, whatever) until something that made him freeze. Ahead was a tan, tall, very handsome muscular man with good looking black hair that ended at his neck, wearing a red plaid button down shirt, blue jean and black steel boots. Knowing that was his angel's holoform was kissing some strawberry blonde haired woman, just staring at them his heart split in two and the answer was clear, Optimus had someone. Will ran to his room, away from the sight not caring that tears were streaming down his face.
When he got to his room Will went to his bed and took something underneath his pillow. Taking it out it was a navy blue journal, opening it he began to write the last thing he would ever write.
Lost
So this is it…
Everything around me is starting to shatter
Fall apart, like glass
Why does everything I loved being taken away from me?
My heart no longer to carry on another day
Is my life not worth living?
Everything I had…
Gone
Now just when I had something
Someone who would keep me away from my short end
This one I loved
Taken away
Now I have nothing
All I can hear is my empty heart
My heart beats slower and slower until…
It shatters
I can feel my blood getting cold
My skin getting pale
My body becoming lifeless
Is this it? Is this the reason to my questions?
Why?
Closing the book Will places it on his bed, walked to the bathroom where in a secret compartment was a small, towel that had blood all over, a knife and razor both stained with blood. Taking of his shirt showing his bare chest, Will looked in the mirror, he had a nice built body but it was covered with scars. From his arms to torso, there were many scars but there was one that stood out, this was a big on his abs. He signed as he picked up the blood stained knife, placed the cool blade against his left forearm, and slit it. Feeling the pain flow in, he slit another and another then he did it to the other side, cutting from his wrist to his shoulders. Putting the knife down he looked at himself his arms was completely bloody, though he could feel like he was going to collapse due to the blood lost, Will wasn't finished looking at himself again he picked up the knife and pointed at his heart. This was it… he had no other reason to live, so this was his only way to escape from all the pain. He closed his eyes and readied himself, until he felt a pair of strong hands grabbing the knife away. Hearing it being thrown on it floor Will felt being carried somewhere, he didn't know he still had his eyes closed not wanting to see who or where this person was taking him.
What do you think you were going, Colonel Willam Lennox?" His body slightly jumped and eyes flew open to realize who it was. It was Optimus! Looking at his face, Optimus was not happy, he looked angry but wait there was tear marks on his face. Will was speechless out of anyone Optimus was the last person he wanted to see him like this. Will sat up with his head hung in shame, soon that shame turned into rage, Will got up with tears starting to come down, furious at Optimus.
"Why did you save me? Don't you understand I wanted to die, you had no right to stop me!"
"What gave you the idea to offline yourself? Do you not understand that many people will miss you!"
"I DON'T CARE; EVERYTHING I LOVED WAS TAKEN AWAY FROM ME!"
"I LOST EVERYTHING I LOVED TOO WILLIAM! BUT DID I OFFLINE MYSELF, NO I DIDN'T, BECAUSE THERE WAS SOMETHING THAT MADE ME CONTINUE ON!"
"OH YEAH, AND WHAT'S THAT!"
"YOU!"
…"w, what did you say?" Shocked from this confession the rage that boiled in Will's body vanished.
"It was you, that I realize there is so much more than meets the eye, whenever I'm with you. All those times we had together… I… started to develop strong feelings for you, William. I never told you because I was afraid you wouldn't love a machine." Optimus turned away not wanting to see Wills' reaction.
"I don't care about that. Optimus you're so beautiful, who cares if you're different." Optimus said nothing.
"What about that woman you were kissing when I passed by?" Will walked in front of Optimus, he looked up and answered.
"She came to me, telling me she had feelings for me, but I did not have feelings for her. I saw you walking and I was about to tell you how I felt about you, but she grabbed onto me, and kissed me. I swear to Primus there is nothing going on between the femme and I. I love you Will."
Will cupped Optimus's face and stared into his electrifying blue eyes, and gave a smile.
"Good, because I love you too."With that said he put his lips onto Optimus, suddenly Will broke the kiss and collapsed lucky Optimus caught him in time. He send a private comm. to Ratchet and rushed to the medical bay.
Well that's it yay! Please be gentle this is the first story I ever written, the poem Lost was written by Storm Monroe. I know this chapter as a lot of errors I will fix them. Please r/r. Thank you!
spy476