Disclaimer: Farscape is not mine. Farscape belongs to the Jim Henson Company, Rockne S. O'Bannon and various other parties. However if something isn't done with it soon I am seriously considering staging a coup... You have been warned...

This story is set during season 3, between Fractures and I-Yensch, You-Yensch. I always figured some sort of insanity went on while they were waiting on Scorpius... plus I wanted to torture Crais and Jool awhile...

Enjoy!

The Last Huu' Rah

"I said 'No', Crichton!"

"And I said, I ain't takin 'No' for an answer… Captain." John Crichton grinned and tightened his grip.

Bialar Crais growled.

On his other arm D'Argo also increased the pressure. Crais was trapped between the two, being marched firmly to Moya's hanger. It was as if they thought he would turn and run like a frightened bunyip if they relaxed for even a microt. Well, Crais thought glumly, it had almost worked. Perhaps he was slowed by the unfamiliar… attire. Really, he was going to have to kill Crichton for this… He struggled again briefly, to no avail. D'Argo bared his teeth at him in a predatory smile.

"Oh no, we're not doing that again." D'Argo leaned closer to his ear. "Y'know, it's probably better just to go along with him. He always seems to get his way in the end anyway."

Crais blinked. Ka D'Argo had not just been sympathetic to him…friendly to him…had he? He turned his head and quirked an eyebrow inquisitively at the luxan. The warrior glowered in return and hissed. Crais turned back quickly. No, definitely not.

It was all absolute foolishness. He had been impressed when Crichton had made the decision to destroy Scorpius' research right under the half-breed's nose. Though he would never entirely like the human, Crais had developed a great deal of respect for him. With a sense of purpose he had not felt in a cycle, he stood with Aeryn Sun and John Crichton in the decision to take on the practically suicidal mission. He had expected the human to remain thoughtful and serious in preparation.

That lasted exactly one solar day.

It had been relatively easy to prepare and plant messages, suggesting a temporary truce and meeting. He and Aeryn had enough knowledge between them of peacekeeper intelligence networks to see that Scorpius would get the information from at least six different sources but still be unable to pinpoint their ever changing location. Once the messages were sent however, it became a waiting game. It would take weekens or perhaps even moyens of careful communications before the terms of a face to face meeting could be hammered out.

Merely the thought of it seemed to aggravate Crichton's impatience and he had come up with one of his infamous 'plans'.

A last 'Huu'rah'.

Crais was not familiar with that particular term, however, being a former soldier who had had his fair share of battle 'preps' , he suspected it involved vast quantities of raslak.

The others had rolled their eyes and agreed. Crais had not agreed and yet here he was. He was not sure why the human was so intent on involving him. Crais sighed as Crichton and D'Argo, smirking, dragged him unceremoniously into the hanger bay.

All three froze as Aeryn Sun dropped down from the prowler she had been working on.

Aeryn had also refused to participate in the huu'rah but in her case Crichton had not pursued it. Crais did not have to ask why.

As she studied them expressionlessly, Crais felt an uncomfortable ache in his chest. He did not need to look at Crichton to know his face had also gone blank. It was intolerable, he was only just coming to terms with his own hopeless feelings for Aeryn. Now he was being daily confronted with the excruciating dance between a grieving Officer Sun and the twin of the man she mourned…who was also hopelessly in love with her. He was beginning to suspect they had all decided to face Scorpius simply as a distraction from the ridiculously painful situation.

There was a microns silence and then she smiled faintly. Crais' heart lurched painfully. It had been far too long since he had seen Aeryn Sun smile.

"I see they've dragged you into this." Aeryn looked him up and down.. She sounded amused. The captain resisted the urge to squirm. Frelling Crichton..."This might actually be good for you Crais. I don't think I've ever seen you really relax."

Then she frowned at Crichton and D'Argo. He felt their grips slacken. Perhaps he could make another run for it…

"Of course, if you don't want to go…" She sighed. "You shouldn't force him, Crichton." Crais was standing close enough to the human that he actually felt him flinch. Her tone was not cold exactly, but it held little emotion. Aeryn had carefully separated the two John Crichton's for her own sanity. John had followed her to Talyn. Became her lover. Died. Crichton remained on Moya and lived. And the human felt that distinction bitterly.

This was Crais' opportunity. With Aeryn's support he could bow out of the human's ridiculous plans, return to Talyn, work on the young leviathan's systems…

But Aeryn had smiled at the thought of his participating in the huu'rah. She approved of his further association with her comrades. It amused her. With a long suffering sigh, he shook off the human and the luxan and, with deliberation, squared his shoulders and clasped his hands behind his back.

"As distasteful as I find this entire exercise, Officer Sun, I suppose it will be easier to simply accede to Crichton's…ah… 'request'. After all", he added dryly, "they will require at least one responsible individual to keep them out of trouble."

Ka D'Argo and Crichton choked behind him, but his attention remained fixed on Aeryn. With pleasure Crais watched a slow smile slip across her face. He would suffer any indignity if it distracted Aeryn from her grief for even one microt.

"If you insist Crais." She said lightly. "Perhaps I'll take the opportunity to visit with Talyn while all of you are occupied."

Crais nodded. " He would enjoy that."

"Excellent." Crichton interrupted with forced cheerfulness. "Well, that's settled, where are Buckwheat and the girls?"

Aeryn shrugged, deliberately avoiding the human's eyes as she hoisted herself back into the prowler. "They got tired of waiting and went down."

"Oh man, we better get going boys, Chiana and Jool have got one hell of a head start." The human clapped Crais sharply on the shoulder. "Avast ye matey... time for a bit o' shore leave!" Crais straightened the unfamiliarly loose fabric of the coat, regretting his leathers and rolling his eyes followed Crichton and D'Argo onto the second transport pod.

Crichton seemed more manic than usual as his hands danced over the controls. "Those girls can really put it away," he began as the pod pulled gracefully away from Moya. "Yo D', remember that planet with the love juice…?"

D'Argo groaned. "Don't remind me…"

As they made their way to the surface, Crais listened to the stories of their previous experiences with increasing alarm. Perhaps this hadn't been such a good idea after all…