Itachi Uchiha was sitting on the couch in the living room of the Akatsuki base, trying to focus on watching the TV. This was made rather difficult first by the screams coming from Zetsu's room, and then by a pair of arms wrapping around his neck. "Can I help you?"
"Hi Itachi, un," Deidara said, nuzzling the weasel gently. "Whatcha doing, un?"
"Trying to watch TV," Itachi said in an irritated tone, hoping it would make the blonde go away.
Instead, Deidara merely climbed over the couch, flopping down next to the weasel. "Can I sit with you, un?"
"…Fine."
Deidara grinned and sat up, snuggling into the Uchiha's side. "Thanks, un."
Itachi silently wrapped an arm around the blonde's oh-so-feminine waist, pulling him even closer to the weasel. Deidara took this opportunity to climb into the Uchiha's lap, snuggling into Itachi's chest. "You're being awfully quiet, un," he remarked.
"Hn," Itachi replied.
"Don't 'hn' me!" Deidara ordered, pouting. "You know I hate trying to figure out what you mean when you-OWW!"
The outcry startled Itachi, even more so when the blonde suddenly clutched his right hand to his chest. "What happened?"
"I bit my tongue, un," Deidara whimpered, holding up his handmouth for Itachi to see.
Instantly an annoyed look crossed the weasel's face. "What do you want me to do about it?"
Deidara's visible eye grew wide, and before Itachi knew it there was an extremely uke-ish look on Deidara's face. He inwardly groaned as the blonde moved his hand to the weasel's face, a pleading look in his eye. He grabbed the hand and brought it to his mouth, gently kissing the injured tongue. "Better?"
"Now you have to kiss this one, un," Deidara commanded, sticking the other handmouth in Itachi's face.
"Deidara, I'm not-"
"Please?" Deidara begged, the uke look crossing his face again.
"Damn this bleeding heart of mine," Itachi thought as he kissed the other handmouth. "Now are you happy?"
The sculptor responded by wrapping his arms around Itachi's neck and kissing him on the lips. "Yeah, un," he whispered, snuggling back into the crook of Itachi's neck.
It seemed like the weasel would finally get some peace as he sat on the couch, running his fingers through Deidara's silky soft hair. The blonde was finally quiet, so he could focus on watching TV-"Itachi, un?"
Well there went that brilliant idea. "What now?"
"Why don't you ever smile, un?"
Itachi looked down at the artist in his lap, who was gazing up at him with a look of true curiosity on his face. "Hmm?"
"You heard me. You never smile, un. Why?"
"I don't feel like it."
"That's not a good excuse, un. Smiling is healthy for you."
"As I recall, you wouldn't smile for weeks after Saso-" Itachi cut himself off when he saw the pained look cross Deidara's face. The artist buried his face in Itachi's chest, hands twisting in the fabric of the weasel's shirt.
It had been several months since Sasori had been killed, and Deidara was slowly getting over his death, mainly because Itachi was there for comfort and company, easing the blonde's pain. He'd finally been able to ask the sculptor out, and Deidara had accepted. Still, whenever the late puppet master was mentioned in conversation, Deidara had mini-breakdowns like this.
"Dei, calm down," Itachi pleaded, stroking the bomber's hair soothingly. No response. "Dei, please?" He felt something wet on his shirt. "That's too low to be Deidara's tears…" Itachi looked down, eyes narrowing. That explained it. "Deidara, if you won't calm down, will you at least stop your handmouth from chewing on my shirt?"
"They like chewing when I'm upset, un," Deidara admitted sheepishly, pulling away from the weasel, a small smile playing on his lips.
Itachi leaned in and gave the blonde a chaste kiss, pulling away. "Better now?"
"You're smiling, un!"
"Hmm?"
Itachi very nearly had his ribs cracked by the hug Deidara gave him. "Awww, Ita-kun's smiling for me, un!" the blonde happily declared.
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
"You're smiling! Well, you were, un," Deidara corrected, seeing the blank look on Itachi's face.
"No I wasn't."
"Yes you were, un!"
"Hn."
"Don't start that again, un!"
BAM
"Oww, un!" Deidara whimpered, rubbing his injured head.
"Be quiet," Itachi ordered. Deidara snuggled back into his chest, muttering something about stupid abusive boyfriends. "Thank you," Itachi said once Deidara had gotten settled.
"You're just lucky you're so snuggly, un," Deidara muttered.
"I love you too."
The blonde merely hmmphed and buried his face in Itachi's chest once more. In only a matter of minutes, the blonde's breathing was low and even, and his eyes were shut, a calm look on his sleeping face.
Itachi gently pressed his lips against the top of Deidara's head. "Deidara, I never smile because until I had you, I really didn't have a good reason to smile. So remember; I'll smile, but just for you."