Disclaimer: Ownership is neither claimed nor implied.
A/N: "If I could see the future and how this plays out..."
"Sorry Finn, Noah isn't here," Mrs Puckerman said in response to her son's best friend's urgent question.
"But it's almost midnight," Finn said, looking confused. "When do you think he'll be home?" he asked, wondering if he should just wait in his car.
"Probably around six thirty," Mrs Puckerman replied with a roll of her eyes. "Noah only spends five or six nights a month here," she revealed. "I have no idea where he spends the rest of his nights," she admitted to Finn. The only thing Mrs Puckerman was fairly certain of was that her son was spending his nights with the same girl and had been for about two years, Mrs Puckerman had noticed the repeating pattern and had quite happily deduced that the only nights Noah spent in his own bed, were when this person was 'indisposed'. It certainly seemed that way anyway and at least she could assume from that, that Noah and 'whoever' were being safe. God help him if he took risks like that again, she'd already warned him, if it happened again, she'd cut 'Little Puck' off, he wouldn't get a third chance, she couldn't have another grandchild out there in the world and not be a part of it's life.
"Shit," Finn muttered under his breath, trying to come up with something else. Puck had been his first thought, he didn't know what else to do, who else to talk to. "His truck's here so it can't be too far away," he said, hoping to get a clue from Mrs Puckerman.
"Finn, I genuinely do not know where he goes, he never drives there," Mrs Puckerman assured the worried looking boy. "Seriously, if I knew, I would tell you," she said firmly.
"Mmmm," Puck sighed as her lips trailed from his chest, lower, lower, following a centre line, lower, lower, lower, "ahhh," he sucked in his breath as she reached her destination. He looked down his body, watched her head move up and down, Puck thrust his fingers through her hair and lifted her slightly, forcing her to look at him. "God you're fucking awesome at that," he sighed, smiling appreciatively, he relaxed his grip in her hair and allowed her to continue with her preferred method of making him lose it.
"Time for you to go," she whispered, licking the traces of him from her lips. "Seriously, I think if you didn't wake up with a massive boner every morning, you'd be out of here as soon as you get your breath back after you fuck me at night," she semi grumbled, just a little hint of truth and unrest in her voice.
"You know you'd miss me if I wasn't here to hold you all night," Puck countered, hoping that she'd agree with him. She didn't, instead she pushed him out of bed then complained that he'd made a noise. "Well excuse the fuck out of me," Puck muttered, "I don't hear you complaining when my dick is so deep inside you that I don't know where you end and I start."
"Can we not do this right now?" she asked wearily. "Look you have to go, we have to get to school, I'll see you later."
"Puck," Finn hissed from a distance of three desks away. "Puck," he called a little louder when Puck didn't respond. "Nudge him, will you Carlos?" he asked the guy sat beside Puck.
"What?" Puck shouted when someone nudged him awake. "Jeez, what?" he asked, noting that the teacher's drone had stopped and every eye, it seemed, was on him.
"So you've decided to join us in mind as well as body today Mr Puckerman," Ms Duesenberry said sarcastically. "I'm so pleased about that, next week is your final test," she told the class at large. "This is it, it all counts toward your final grade," she warned, glaring pointedly at Puck. "You have one chance left, all of you, don't waste it," she advised.
"Meh, meh, meh," Puck muttered, looking down at his hands, he'd heard this all before and to be honest, he was sick of it. He knew he wasn't going to set the world on fire academically, so why the hell did everyone else have such a bug up their ass about it? If he passed, he passed, woop-de-doo, if he didn't, well, so what? He'd be just like his dad, a high school drop out, no biggie, just another way he'd manage to carry on the Puckerman family traditions. Get a girl pregnant in high school, check, fail all your classes, check. Puck sighed, why couldn't he be more like her, why couldn't he have ambition, brains? He sighed again and walked out into the hallway. "S'up?" he belatedly asked Finn.
"I went to your house last night," Finn revealed. "Where were you?" he demanded crossly.
"Who are you, my mother?" Puck asked. "I was fucking some bitch's brains out," he said loudly as he and Finn walked into the choir room.
"Thank you Puck, but can you tone the language down a little, please?" Mr Schue said, his back to the class as he wrote on the whiteboard.
"Sorry Mr Schue," Puck replied, his tone blatantly insincere. "I was aquainting some random girl with the awesome beast known as Puckasaurus," he said with a cheesy grin, both fore fingers pointing at his crotch. "Live while you're young," he advised Finn with wink.
"Guys, can you settled down please? Quinn has something she'd like to share with us," Mr Schue called, bringing the class to attention.
Quinn stood shyly at the front of the class, looking at her friends, she mentioned something personal about each and every one of them. Then she got to Puck. "I know that I didn't make things easy for you the whole time I lived with you," she admitted quietly, her eyes locked with Puck's, "and in the time since, I know, I haven't been fair, but I won't ever forget you," she told him, her eyes a little damp, a little bloodshot, then she looked round at the class, "but I have to tell you all this, I have been accepted to Yale," she announced, her beaming smile showing exactly how proud of herself she was.
"Yale?" Puck cried as he stood up, his chair crashing backwards. "What the fuck?" he sounded furious. "When did you decide this?" he demanded. "I thought...I thought...you know what? It doesn't even matter, do whatever you like," he growled as he stormed past and out of the room.
"What's with him?" Finn, Mike, Tina and Mercedes all asked at the same time. Quinn shrugged and looked just as puzzled as the rest of them.
"Not going out tonight Noah?" Mrs Puckerman asked quietly, she looked at her son laid flat out on his bed, she noted the clenching of his jaw, the hint of a sparkle in his eyes.
"Nope," Puck replied, his voice thick, unlike his usual clear tones. He was laid on his back with his hands underneath his head, he didn't even turn to look at his mom.
"Is everything ok?" Mrs Puckerman asked, leaning a little further into his room. "Anything I can do to help?"
"Mom, I'm fine, just...I'm fine," Puck sighed, he waited till she'd closed his door before he allowed himself to release a quivering breath. Puck felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. "Hey," he answered shortly when he saw who had called him. He listened intently then broke in. "Look, it doesn't matter, forget it," he said then listened again. "No, not tonight," he replied then listened, "because I don't feel like it, look, I'm not a freakin' machine, I can't just perform when you click your fingers," he said, his voice rising in anger. "Yeah? You really think that? Well, fuck you," he shouted then threw his iPhone across the room. "Fuck it," he growled at himself when it hit the wall.
"So what did you want to talk to me about yesterday?" Puck asked Finn as they both dropped into seats in the auditorium.
"I need to find a way to tell Rachel that I'm not going to New York with her," Finn whispered, hoping that no one else would hear.
"Woah, dude, she is going to have your balls for that," Puck murmured, he did not envy Finn or what was in his immediate future. "So what are you going to do instead?" he asked.
Finn stayed silent for a few moments, he looked bewildered as if he couldn't quite believe it himself. "I joined the army," he admitted with a little mocking laugh.
"Oh crap," Puck breathed, wide eyed, slack jawed. "What the hell did you go and do that for?" he asked.
"I just thought I could maybe prove to the world that my dad was a hero, he wasn't just a smackhead," Finn sighed. A usual Finn felt really stupid, embarrassed as he did every time he thought about the way he had banged on and on over the years about how wonderful his dad was, what a sacrifice he'd made giving his life in Iraq when really he'd come to a miserable end in a drug den in Cincinnati.
"Well, that's going to make all the difference," Puck mocked. "She's still going to kill you," he advised, lounging back in the seat to listen to Quinn singing Never Can Say Goodbye. Puck noticed that Quinn did not make any effort to make eye contact with him. At all.
"So will you help me?" Puck asked the Glee guys, hoping that they would pull out all the stops to save him from a fate worse than being his dad. "If I don't graduate I can see me doing the same thing in fifteen years, I'll be sat in front of Beth asking her for rent money. I can't do that to her," he insisted, still seeing in his mind the moment his dad asked him for money. Puck sighed even heavier, why did he have to give his dad all of that money? Now he was screwed, now he didn't even have enough gas money to get out of Lima, never mind get all the way to California.
Puck made the most valiant effort to kick the geography test's ass. It didn't quite work out like he wanted. He still failed. Ms Duesenberry really, really did not like him, Puck didn't think she'd have passed him even if he'd got every question right, she'd have found a way to fail him.
"Fuck it, I'm out of here," Puck sighed to himself when he was handed his paper with a big fat red F on it.
"You can't leave yet," Finn insisted when Puck told him of his plan to hitch all the way to California. "We have Nationals in three days and we need something, some gimmick that is going to kick Vocal Adrenaline's ass," he added, deep in thought. "They have Unique, we need something."
Puck took it upon himself to provide the something. He walked into the choir room in a dress and a blond wig. "Unique does the cross dressing thing, we can too," he said, as his team mates stared at him in stunned silence.
Quinn stood up quickly and grabbed Puck's arm, dragging him away to get back into his own clothes before anyone else saw him. "That is my dress," she hissed. "What the hell do you think you're doing? Do you think for one moment that any of the girls won't recognise it? I only wore it two days ago, God," she groaned, her hands over her eyes.
"So?" Puck replied. "Like they're even going to connect it," he scoffed. "You worry too much," he added as he fastened his jeans. "At least I had boxers on underneath it," he smirked, his eyebrows flicking up and down and the hint of a smirk touching his lips. Quinn didn't reply, she just gave him the narrow eyed stare that could cut him to pieces.
"So how did Puck get your dress?" Mercedes asked as they sat down to lunch.
"That wasn't my dress," Quinn quickly denied. "It looks like it, but it's not my dress," she said with a perfectly performed smile.
"Which would be so much more convincing if your hand wasn't trembling," Mercedes shot back at Quinn. "It's fine, you don't have to tell me what's going on with you and Puck, as long as it makes you happy," she said with a huge grin.
"There is nothing going on between Puck and I," Quinn insisted, a little exasperated as though she had been asked that question many times and was fed up of refuting it.
Puck went back that night, for the first time in two weeks. It wasn't the same. "There's nothing left, is there?" he asked sadly. She shook her head, she didn't have the energy to reply verbally, this way at least she might not break down and cry. At least, she hoped she wouldn't. Puck stood up and got dressed, he felt her eyes on him the whole time. "See ya," he whispered as he touched his lips to hers one last time. He didn't wait to see the single tear that slipped down her cheek.
"Puck has something for us today," Mr Schue announced, stating the obvious as Puck was in front of the class with his guitar at the ready.
"Thanks Mr Schue," Puck said, nodding to the teacher. "This one won't really mean much to most of you, but here goes," he said awkwardly then began to play his guitar.
"(And I hope, and I hope)
I've practiced this for hours, gone round and round
And now I think that I've got it all down
And as I say it louder, I love how it sounds
'Cause I'm not taking the easy way out
Not wrappin' this in ribbons
Shouldn't have to give a reason why
It's no surprise I won't be here tomorrow
I can't believe that I stayed 'til today
Yeah you and I will be a tough act to follow
But I know in time we'll find this was no surprise
It came out like a river, once I let it out
When I thought that I wouldn't know how
Held onto it forever, just pushing it down
It felt so good to let go of it now
Not wrapping this in ribbons
Shouldn't have to give a reason why
It's no surprise I won't be here tomorrow
I can't believe that I stayed 'til today
There's nothing here in this heart left to borrow
There's nothing here in this soul left to save
Don't be surprised when we hate this tomorrow
God knows we tried to find an easier way
Yeah you and I will be a tough act to follow
But I know in time we'll find this was no surprise
Our favorite place we used to go
The warm embrace that no one knows
The lovin' look that's left your eyes
That's why this comes as no, as no surprise
If I could see the future and how this plays out
I bet it's better than where we are now
But after going through this
It's easier to see the reason why
It's no surprise I won't be here tomorrow
I can't believe that I stayed 'til today (stayed 'til today)
Yeah you and I will be a tough act to follow
But I know in time we'll find this was no surprise
The kiss goodnight, it comes with me
Both wrong and right, our memories (our memories)
The whispering before we sleep
Just one more thing that you can't keep (you can't keep)
Our favorite place we used to go
The warm embrace that no one knows
The lovin' look that's left your eyes
But I know in time we'll find this was no surprise
(And I hope, and I hope, and I hope, and I hope, and I hope)"
Silence filled the choir room for endless seconds, the only sound that could be heard was Puck's harsh breathing. Suddenly, Quinn jumped up from her seat and, trying to stifle a sob, ran out of the choir room. "Quinn, wait," Puck cried, putting his guitar down then haring off after her.
New Directions looked at each other, puzzled. What had they just witnessed? "What was that all about?" Rachel asked, still confused. "That looked and sounded like a break up song but Puck and Quinn aren't together, haven't been together, have they?" she asked, all she recieved were even more confused looks.
Puck found Quinn in the darkened rafters of the auditorium. "Our favourite place," he murmured, reaching for her hand. Quinn bit back a sob as he drew her into his arms, his chin resting on her head. "Come on Quinn, we knew this was happening, you're heading off to Yale, I'll probably end up in jail," he said quietly, "hey, I'm a poet," he quipped.
"You could come with me," Quinn said, looking up at him with tearful eyes.
"I don't think there are that many pools in New Haven, I think I have a better chance in California," he sighed.
"But you don't need to clean pools for the rest of your life," Quinn insisted, her tone becoming a little desperate.
"Quinn," Puck said gently, putting her away from him a little to look into her eyes, "we both know this isn't going anywhere, it never has been, sure we talked about you applying to colleges in California and yeah, we would have gone there together, but that's not where your future is now," he said as though explaining a huge problem. "But mine is," he added softly then bent his head to give Quinn the sweetest, most bitter kiss ever. "I do love you Q, but it has to be this way," he said, then left Quinn to her tears, he knew she needed the time to pull herself together.
"I'm ready to tell you," Puck announced as he lounged against the door frame.
"Oh, Noah, you startled me," Mrs Puckerman said. "Tell me what? You're not in any trouble again, are you?" she asked.
"No mom, I'm not in any trouble," Puck replied as he came to sit with his mother. "For the last two years I've spent almost every night with Quinn," he admitted then waited a second for his mom to respond, she didn't say anything. "And now it's over and everyone knows about it," he added, "and Quinn is going to Yale in the fall, I'm heading for California," he said, seeing the shock and surprise in his mom's eyes.
"Oh," Mrs Puckerman said, blinking repeatedly, trying to think of a reply. "As long as you're happy, Noah, that's all any mom wants, for her kids to be happy."
"Not yet, but maybe, in time I will be," Puck admitted, feeling himself well up again. "Who is this sappy nerd?" he asked out loud, mocking himself as his mom drew him into a tight hug.
"You really loved her, huh?" Mrs Puckerman murmured, she'd always wondered about the relationship between them, she had seen the pure, genuine affection they had for each other when Quinn had lived with them, despite them both trying desperately to hide it from each other. Puck nodded, his lips in a tight line. "Maybe things don't have to be as over as you think," she said, confusing Puck.
"What do you mean?" Puck asked, looking at his mom like she was nuts.
"I mean, I know that you've been looking at community colleges, I know you have more ambition than just wanting to waste your days getting laid," Mrs Puckerman replied, giving her son the 'why did you even think you could hide this from me' look that all moms know how to do. "Why don't you try to find a community college near Yale?" she suggested. "And don't give me the it's all over speech again," she advised, "tell that to someone who doesn't know how to read your eyes."
Puck looked down a little embarrassed, God he hated it when his mom was right. He stood up to go check the internet. "Thanks mom," he said quietly.
When Coach Beiste persuaded Ms Duesenberry to give Puck another chance at the test, it made all the difference, his mom's belief in him did the rest. Puck knew exactly what he needed to do, he needed to grab that test by the throat and grip it till it gave up the ghost. And he did. With honours.
"May I present to you the graduates of William McKinley High School 2012," Principal Figgins said in his strangely accented English. One by one he read out the name of the sudent and as Ms Pilsbury handed them their diploma, Principal Figgins stated that student's career path. "Rachel Berry," he called, "NYADA." After several other students had been called Principal Figgins called Quinn's name. "Quinn Fabray, Yale," he shouted, clapping proudly as if he'd had a hand in her success. "Finn Hudson, United States Army," he called, noting the scowl on Rachel Berry's face. Endless students were called to the stage and the next step in their life announced to the whole audience.
Puck waited nervously, he caught sight of his mom and Quinn's stood together, applauding each person as they took their diploma and waved to the audience.
"Noah Puckerman," Pricipal Figgins cried with more relief than he'd ever thought he'd feel at a student graduating. "Gateway Community College, New Haven," he announced.
Quinn stopped clapping, her smile fell from her face, had she just heard that right? New Haven? She looked at Puck, saw the sheepish smile on his face and launched herself at him. "You're coming with me?" she asked breathlessly, Puck grinned and nodded then hugged her tight again as Principal Figgins read out more names and acheivements.
"Did you have any idea?" Mrs Puckerman asked Mrs Fabray as they both carried on clapping.
"Oh yes, I knew all about it," Judy Fabray admitted, "I just never told them I knew about it," she shrugged. "I figured they knew what they were doing and after the way I let Quinn down when I allowed Russell to throw her out, I didn't think I had the right to object. They make each other happy," she added, still clapping.
"So you're ok with them going off to New Haven together?" Mrs Puckerman pushed, hoping that she would be.
"I didn't think for one second that it would really be over," Judy grinned, "I knew it would just be a little bump in the road," she added, giving Quinn a little wave. "And that's why I rented her an apartment instead of her going into halls," she said, laughing even more at the look on Mrs Puckerman's face. "I can't see them living in the same town and not living together, can you?"