Lately my thoughts have been directed to the Season 1 love scenes. This one from "Imperfect Circles" just wouldn't go away.
Barbie finished placing the cushions back on the sofa, fully aware of Julia standing at the window – her back to the room, her head bowed. He could hear the soft cries of baby Alice and Norrie's grief stricken sobs but he couldn't hear Julia. He knew she was crying though trying not to – he could hear the occasional sniff and saw her try to furtively wipe away the tears. Wanting to comfort her was foremost on his mind and this was foreign to him. Until now his only relationships were hook ups and one night stands. He scarcely hung around long enough to catch his breath before he was out the door, let alone feeling the need to comfort someone. Wanting to hang around...that was different too – he was always seeking her out. If there was a crowd, he looked for her riotous red curls, if someone walked into the diner, he looked up hoping it was her. Of course he wanted her - beautiful, sexy, determined – lips that begged to be kissed. And she had come looking for him in the rain – seeking comfort from him. Was it only last night? It already felt longer and not long enough. Once he touched her, kissed her, made love to her...he only wanted to start all over again. This morning made him dare to hope for more days and nights and forevers with her, but he still hadn't told her about Peter and his good intentions of doing just that were abruptly forestalled when Harriet went into labor. The sound of a soft sob that she couldn't quite mask made up his mind to, once again, throw caution to the wind. It may cost him later, cost him dearly, but he could not stop himself from going to her. Amidst all that was confusing him, he knew without a doubt, this was right.
"Hey" his voice was a mere breath against her hair, his hands gently touching her arms. He was afraid she would reject him but once again she did the unexpected, leaning back against his body, taking his hands and wrapping his arms around her.
"I'm glad you were here today" she began struggling against her ever falling tears..."and God, I hate crying. I'm happy for Harriet but so torn up about Alice. The more I try to stop, the harder I cry. I'm sorry."
"Julia, it's OK" He slowly turned her to face him and held her close. "It's OK. Don't be sorry...get it out. For what it's worth, I'm here."
His words broke the dam and she sobbed against his shoulder, for Harriet's joy, for Alice's untimely death and for their inexplicable entrapment by the dome. She cried because his words meant so much to her and she couldn't explain how that could be after only a few days. In the end she stopped trying to figure it out and let him soothe her in the circle of his arms, his soft murmurs calming her distress.
Finally the tears, the sadness, the helplessness eased and she gently pulled back wiping the tears that were left. She felt a gentle touch moving stray curls away from her face, an almost imperceptible caress against her cheeks.
"Come sit with me." He reached for her hand, their fingers automatically circling together. He led her to the sofa, pulling her against him as he sat, one leg on, one off with Julia wedged in between. She sighed, feeling at peace, her thoughts trying to decipher why this man had that effect on her. She was more than a little afraid, afraid that she was feeling too much, too soon for someone she barely knew. So why did it feel so right? Tilting her head she looked into his eyes and saw a mixture of tenderness, sadness and confusion. When she felt his lips press against her forehead, she couldn't deny the evidence any longer...she was falling in love with him and that terrified her most of all. She was under no illusions about his lifestyle. She knew he was only here because he had no choice...so what would happen when the dome ceased to exist. She had already surrendered a piece of her heart to him and it had happened without her even realizing. When he left and she was sure he would, she would be broken. Yet she couldn't stop herself, this felt amazingly right, more right than anything she had ever done before.
Her thoughts were interrupted as the front door opened and Angie walked into the room, a worried look on her face. "Hey are you two OK? Joe told me what happened today...about Harriet and Norrie's mom too. You look exhausted! Why don't you go home, get some rest. I'll keep an eye on things here."
"Are you sure Angie?" Julia could hardly keep her eyes open but didn't feel quite right about leaving either.
"I'm sure and if anything comes up that I can't handle, I'll call you. By the way, your Prius is outside, all charged up, keys are in it. Didn't think you'd want to walk."
"Thanks sweetie." Julia pushed herself off the sofa, Barbie's hand at the small of her back, helping her in case she faltered. As they were making their way to the door, Angie stopped them. "Wait...I didn't get a chance to thank you before...so thanks, Barbie. Thanks for saving me from the Dundee's. I owe you so if there's ever anything...anything I can do for you, all you have to do is ask." She stretched up on her toes and kissed his cheek, her eyes still haunted by what almost happened and by the nightmare of what did.
"You don't owe me anything but thanks...things the way they are around here, I may very well need that help someday. I'm just sorry I wasn't there in time to keep Rose safe. You take care, Angie."
Julia's eyes widened in comprehension. She gently pulled the young girl into a hug smoothing her hair back. "Be careful tonight. Don't go anywhere and don't let anyone in. There have been too many casualties around here already."
"I will. Joe is here and I think Ben will stay if we ask him to. We'll be OK. Now go...I'll see both of you tomorrow." She held the door open as they left, locking it securely behind her.
At the car Julia paused, looking up hopefully. "Think you could drive?"
Barbie leaned over, kissing the tip of her nose. "Sure. Let's go home." She slid into the passenger seat as he held the door for her, breathing a sigh of relief when he started the car and pulled smoothly away from the curb. She wasn't surprised that he reached for her hand, rubbing his thumb gently across her knuckles. When he needed both hands to negotiate a turn, she let hers settle on his thigh and soon his own covered her smaller hand.
"I like your hand there"...was all he said.
"Oh you do?...she teased..."so you're saying you like women caressing your body while you drive?"
"No, I'm not saying that at all...his voice low and husky..."just you."
Julia felt her breath catch at the intensity in his voice. She watched as he pulled into her driveway, shifting gears, turning the key. Suddenly the car felt too big...there was too much space between them while at the same time emotions were pressing in, making it hard to breathe.
In the blink of an eye, Barbie was leading her into the house with an urgency that matched her own. Once inside he pulled her into his arms. He felt like he was drowning in the depths of her eyes and moved to capture her lips, to save himself, to win her. His hand moved to cup her breast, his fingers moving in tantalizing circles as his tongue traced the soft fullness of her lips, all but silencing her gasps of pleasure. Julia felt his lips move to her jaw, her neck, settling below her ear...sending a momentary shiver through her body, quickly replaced with a searing heat she felt to her core. She nipped his earlobe and murmured, her voice a mere wisp of breathless words. "I do believe you're seducing me... and here I wanted to be the one to seduce you."
She felt his lips curve into a smile before, once again, moving to her lips...his kiss a drug she now craved. She answered with that need, intensifying the kiss, feeling more than hearing the groan that came from deep within him. His hands came to rest on her lower back for a brief second before pressing her even closer to his body, her soft sigh at the increased contact arousing them even more.
"Julia...I'm already seduced. Last night in the rain, this morning when you asked me to stay." His words trailed away then continued with an intensity that surprised both of them..."I couldn't turn away from you...not ever."
It was Julia who stepped away first, taking his hand, leading them up the stairs to the bedroom. Stopping at the edge of the bed she grasped the edge of his t-shirt, tugging it up and over his head. She trailed her lips along his jaw, dipping to rest at the side of his neck, her tongue circling a path along his collar bone. She felt his hands edge up her back and rest at the top of her dress. With one brisk movement her zipper was down, her bra unclasped...both pooling at her feet in an instant.
Running her hands up and down his back, her words an enticing invitation. "You have way too many clothes on." She trailed her fingers along his waist to the the button on the front of his jeans, undoing it slowly...moving her fingers up the rough teeth of the zipper tugging it down slowly, his instant response unmistakeable. "Wait." He edged her closer to the bed and slowly lowered her first to sit, then with a gentle pressure to her shoulder, eased her onto a pillow."
Sitting on the edge of the bed, Barbie bent over to untie his laces, toeing off his boots, the rest of his clothing quickly following. As he slid into bed beside Julia, he felt her soft curves mold against the contours of his lean body. This is where he wanted to be...reclaiming that missing part of himself with her. Instead of wanting to take what he could get, a foreign concept crept over him...to give whatever he could and to show her that he cared.
His hands were everywhere, his lips soon following...Julia welcomed each caress, each kiss...her own passion more than matching his. Then he moved over her, balancing on his elbows, looking into her eyes as he claimed her. She saw more than passion there and it made her heart stutter, with hope. Was it possible his feelings matched her own? In the end she could not think at all, she could only move with him. She pressed fevered kisses along his neck and jaw until his mouth captured her lips with a fervor and gentleness that pushed them both over the edge. She pulled him even closer, sighing against his neck as he breathed her name.
After awhile, seconds, minutes, neither knew or cared...Barbie moved to her side cradling her head against his shoulder, his hand buried in her hair. He pressed his lips to her temple, dreading what he was about to say. "Julia, I..." He stopped. Her hand was pressing softly against his lips as she turned to look up at him. "No, whatever it is, don't say it...not tonight. I just want you here...with me."
In answer he merely kissed her once again and drew her close, his thoughts warring within him. He loved her – he was sure of it and he was afraid...afraid that now that he had found her, circumstances would tear them apart. It would be his fault of course but that wouldn't make it hurt any less.
Julia sighed as she settled into him, her hand resting on his chest. Her thoughts were no longer confused because she realized that there was no question that she loved him...this stranger, this enforcer, this selfless protector who came out of nowhere. In merely days, the die was cast and while neither knew what would happen tomorrow, tonight they were at peace and soon fell asleep holding each other, loving each other, needing each other...the future both uncertain and filled with possibilities.