Love Is Insanity

by xpartypoisedx

Frank Iero is a lost case, however his parents don't believe so. Once they find out his grandmother was a famous actress, they begin to try there best to get Frank into the showbiz scene. They start with singing lessons, where his teacher is Mr.Way. When they meet will they become more then friends, and what secrets will they find out?

CHAPTER 1

"What the hell mum? No. you don't even live with me anymore!" I slammed my Nokia onto the scratched marble top counter. Didn't she understand the meaning of no. My parents have always been so eager for me to pursue a career in showbiz, until today when they found out my grandmother was quite a successful actress in her time. Then it seemed i HAD to be this flansy pancy little showboy. I hated acting, wasn't to keen on singing, and ignored anything to do with acting. However, i loved playing the guitar.

"That's where the singing comes in Frankie." My mother had chimed earlier "and i don't suppose it will take us longer than a week to find you a cheap professional!"

My parents weren't wrong. I definitely could do with some goodness in my voice, and it would come in handy if i was to make lyrics after creating a song on guitar. My pansy. Pansy was like my trusty stallion, and for sure would make a prettier show boy than i ever would. With its cheap carved design, and snowy white gloss finish. A woodwork ballerina it would be.

BEEP BEEP BEEP!

My alarm clock sounded. Was that a dream? It couldn't of been, i swear i didn't delete those two-hundred texts messages from dad last night. Probably not, because my phone began ringing again.

"Go away mum, dad!" I shouted groggily, drooling onto the keypad.

"Frank, it's Ray you numbty. Seriously you should save your contacts."

"agh shit, sorry buddy im a bit out of sorts today. Had a dream that my parents got me singing lessons to be mummy's little showboy."

"Dude, what's up with this showbiz thing? We need to hang out and clear it up." He laughed but i could tell he was fed up of me bantering on about this thing. He knew it drove me crazy, and that a therapist was needed if i kept having these delusions.

DING DONG!

"Darling Frankie were here like you asked." My mum called from downstairs. How the hell did she get in, and why was she here? Crap. I pulled my iron maiden shirt on from the side of my bed, and wiped off the residue of last nights remaining eyeliner.

"Frank, you there?" Ray shouted from the phone which was now rattling in its shell on the floor.

"Yeah, sorry Ray gotta go. Parents have arrived. IM probably in the shit for leaving my window open or destroying the neighbours garden patch with my remote control monster truck. You know how they are, always driving past my house like every hour." I chucked my phone back down on the floor and got up, my back clicking in from bending over during the phone call. I pulled my jeans up before my dad reminded me i was 'flying low' and scurried downstairs.

"Son. Good good news." My dad was engulfed in the couch with his arms stretching out either way. He looked happy, for once, with mum cuddled to his side, her arms poised in her lap. "We've managed to get some lessons for you, and the teacher is willing to start your first one tonight."

"um-well i would prefer to just stick with guitar. You know i hate singing, and that time you made me sing toxic at the old ladies karaoke night." I shivered slightly thinking about the wrinkled eyes of all those women feeding me tea and biscuits, and leaving imprints on my cheek with saggy chapped gums.

"Im sure you'll have fun sweety. Ive heard your teacher is a young man around your age, you might make a friend."

"Mum, this man is there to help me sing, not learn to be social." I was feeling slightly shooken that i had a guy as my tutor. Usually all my friends were girls, until i lost all of them by stupid jocks. Probably the main reason we don't have a connection there. They cant all be idiots right?

"Look at the time! I need to head to the ticket office to buy the tickets for billy eliott for us to see." Mum got up and excused herself by hugging me tightly and tripping down the garden path on her peg heels.

"See you Frankie boy." Dad laughed ruffling my hair up "don't forget to get yourself a good meal before you head off." Before i got to say goodbye, he hurried to mum and my door was slammed in the wind.

Tonight, huh?...

CHAPTER 2

Great...i had just spent 30 minutes coughing up my lungs over the phone to Ray about this theatrical situation. And now, i was probably going to be late to my singing lessons. I always make great first impressions! I had been telling Ray that i only had 5 minutes to chat, and before i knew it my lungs were gone, and my alarm was ringing crazily.

I chucked on a black flag top, which was creased terribly from the amount of times i had rolled around in my bed for hours thinking about what i would look like in a tutu, and pulled on some teared jeans, which happened to be naturally like that. I dont know why (sarcasm.) My hair looked like i had been at a concert and got n=knocked over and trampled on. To me it was fine, but just to be safe of my tutor not being a jock i combed it down slightly. To finish it off, i stroked around my eyelids some black eyeliner, and blinked it in, as the outer of my eye shone red giving myself a rebellious look. I loved it.

"Be back soon pansy baby." I laughed stroking the guitar like it had actual limbs. Pansy was, and probably will always be my resort to happiness. My cream coloured tatty guitar, which i could talk to and fiddle with as much as i wanted. I looked across at the mirror laying still at the corner of my room. I stared into it, smoothing down my top and picking up pansy lightly.

*FLASHBACK*

"Frank, dinners ready!" Mum hollered. he had ran as fast as he could down the staircase, his feet skidding to a halt at the bottom.

"What is it mu.." Before he could run to the chairs and stuff down the salad he so dearly loved, a box was distracting him. It lay by Franks chair wrapped in blue paper and sealed with a thin green bow. As he looked up his grandfather was standing there next to it, holding his frail arms out to hug his talented grandson. Frank ran forward hugging his granddad tightly, he looked up into his grandads wrinkly eyes smiling back at him.

"Open it young man. It's for you, and nobody else." Frank had already started to tear aways at the limp pieces of paper, breaking through the carboard with the help of his dad. He looked down and marvelled at the sight he saw.

"A guitar? Thankyou mum, dad, grandad!" He had jumped up into his dads arms, his mum and grandad wrapping there arms round his back in a warm embrace. Frank felt the tears trickle down and tasted salt at his tongue poking out of his mouth. He heard his grandad heartily chuckle.

"I love you grandad" Frank had sniffled smelling the cold but warm smell of burnt charcoal and peppermint tea at the sleeves of his granddads coat.

"You too Frankie boy, you too!" He smiled toothily back.

*END OF FLASHBACK*

I was grinning like a fool at my teary reflection. From that i had to redo my eyes and compose myself, before rushing to the car in my dirty converse. I sat in the car sucking in a hollow breath. Memories were the best, especially when those things had still stuck around no matter how old you get.

I drove through the foggy weather, parking up at the entrance. It looked plain but had the most intircate of detail at its windows and door frame. I grinned into my lap stepping out of the car and running in. My hair was slightly damp at the touch of rain, but it felt refreshing that i was about to meet a new persons, maybe a potential friend. And withought forgetting, have stupid singing lessons.

"He better not faint at the screech of my voice." I whispered to myself.

*Heya! Sorry about the long chapters. I just felt i needed to fill you in on some stuff before Frank and Gerard meet! Ok, see you soon 3

CHAPTER 3

I was quaking in my boots as i knocked on the door.

"C'mon Frank, get a grip of yourself." I said to myself, pinching at the skin on my arms.

"Come in." A hushed voice spoke. So, it was a girl? I opened the door and sat down carefully looking up at my teacher. HE met my gaze, but didn't smile, it seemed more like a frown. I mentally slapped myself for giving off a bad impression, i stare WAY too long.

"Frank Iero? Im , or Gerard if you prefer." He murmered, his face near to hitting the clipboard. He was studying my records carefully, his deep brown eyes glued to the sheets. His stubby light blonde hair prickling at the edges, and soft lips curving down with concentration.

"I-ero. And hello." I corrected him "Don't worry, most people get it wrong."

"It does suit you better, i must admit." He looked up from his papers, and you could see a slight glint in his eyes. "Anyway. Lets get you singing some songs so i can see what i have to work with." His voice trailed off as he moved up to sit on his desk.

"Um..oh yeah." I said

"What songs have you got prepared Frank?" His tone of voice was not stern, his tongue curling gently at my name, the pronounciation perfect.

"I wasn't really told. Or i just didn't look at the files."

"Your parents did say you were quite a scatterbrain. Don't worry, im exactly the same. Im suprised i have this job!" He chuckled. His voice was so contagious, and his smile..wow.

"Yeah." I laughed back. Quite empty for words. "I can sing Bullet With Butterfly Wings."

"Um. Yeah, sure." His breath sounded hitched. "Sorry. Go ahead."

I sucked in a deep breath of air, and began to sing, my eyes shut the whole time

The world is a vampire, sent to drain

Secret destroyers, hold you up to the flames

And what do I get, for my pain?

Betrayed desires, and a piece of the game

I looked at my teacher, both of his feet were tapping against the desks legs.

Even though I know - I suppose I'll show

All my cool and cold - like old job

As i hit the chorus the boys head is bobbing now, and i swear he must of thought the sounds of my voice was good.

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

Then someone will say what is lost can never be saved

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

Now I'm naked, nothing but an animal

But can you fake it, for just one more show?

And what do you want?

I want to change

And what have you got, when you feel the same?

Even though I know - I suppose I'll show

All my cool and cold - like old job

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

Then someone will say what is lost can never be saved

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

I pause at the instrumental breaking into a head bob and jiggling around the room, and i hear Gerard giggle ecstaticly as i spin around at his feet. After that i continue, and slowly hear his voice start to hum and sing the lines with me.

Tell me I'm the only one

Tell me there's no other one

Jesus was the only son, yeah.

Tell me I'm the chosen one

Jesus was the only son for you

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

And someone will say what is lost can never be saved

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a-

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a-

Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage

Tell me I'm the only one

Tell me there's no other one

Jesus was the only son for you

And I still believe that I cannot be saved.

My voice softened as i repeated the lines four times, listening to my teachers voice steadily drift off aswell.

"Sorry. That song is one of my favourites." He looked down creases of blush at his cheekbones.

"Great voice by the way, there are only slight faults there. Im glad to be working with a talented singer anyway."

"Well..thanks. Everyone always said..." My face felt flushed and my eyes were become less dryer by the second.

"Are you alright?" Gerard stepped forward into my view, his eyebrows were arched in concern.

"Yeah. Just people, but i've realised that you can't let that shit get to you. I guess my mum wanted to show me i could sing by taking me here." I wiped the tears from my lips and gave a breathy laugh.

"Your a born musician i can tell." I felt him smile into my shoulder as he pulled me in for a deep-felt hug. I sniffed into his neck, taking in the strong scent of coffee and charred cigerettes. No one had ever hugged me before, or even cared.

"Bring your guitar next time buddy. Your parents told me about you and that prized possesion." He patted my shoulder and opened up the door for me. His smile was calm, clear and deeply- meaningful.

"I will, and thank them for making me so embarrassed." And with that line i stepped back onto the harsh streets and into my battered car. My face was red, from embarrassment, and how friendly he was. Surely it couldn't be a attraction.

Could it?

CHAPTER 4

GERARD'S POV:

I closed the flat door behind me with my shoes slipping of my feet the further i walked into the apartment. I slouched into the teared sofa and grabbed my lighter, firing up yet another killstick. Placing it between my chapped lips, i breathed out heavily, slouching further into the material. I felt like i needed to call Mikey and tell him about my first lesson with one of my students. Mikey was so interested with my life and how my jobs were going, and it felt nice to always have someone by my side that was so curious. It didnt matter how personal it was, Mikey was always the one to run around to the flat and tackle me into an embrace. Sometimes i wanted to spend more time with him, but i knew he was more busy with other stuff aside from always thinking about me. He had a high pay job as a phychiatrist, full time lawyer, and the amount of friends a star could only wish for. I sometimes wish i was him.

But there was me. Living in a scabby rented flat with a job as a singing tutor and worker in a coffee shop. The pay was short and slow, and the work was becoming more strengthous the more money i was earning. I chucked the cigerette on the floor and stroked my greasy bleached hair, sucking in a breath and dialing Mikey's number on my phone. I waited as the phone beeped continously, and then it clicked into the answer phone.

"Hey it's Mikey, im not home at the moment but please leave a message for my dearest concern!"

"Hey Mikes, it's Gee. I was wondering if you could call, not that you should be concerned; im just feeling a bit lonely. But hey, everyone has shit days, im just the few to have everyday being like this. Anyway..im gonna go. Bye." I flicked my phone shut and sighed into my lap. I missed hearing Mikey on the phone. It had been 3 months and it felt like all my smiles have melted now. Apart from today, with Frank. I had actually met a decent life form, and now there was no chance we could be friends, because i was his teacher. I've had those past experiences where i thought i was about to befriend my own teacher in school, but no, apparently these thoughts were stupid fucking delusions. And there was a period of time where a thing such as company had been nothing but dust. Frank seemed different though. In an empty room with no one to watch over us perhaps i could befriend this kid who says he has no talent whatsoever. I just need to learn how to include smiles in my day, and socialize withought making a situation awkward. I just needed to consider others first. Until then, i needed to prepare for my early shift tommorow. That was just one step in a mountain of a staircase.

FRANK'S POV:

"Tell me bout your lessons then Frank." Ray and i were sitting on my bed playing Crash Bandicoot. It was the morning after my lessons with , i had never felt more ecstatic about anything before.

"Well he is a guy."

"No shit!" Ray laughed.

"He is like around my age, i think..and has a nice smile."

"Your so awkward dude. C'mon, just tell me everything."

"Fine. We only spent an hour together but he said i had good music taste, and liked the song i had to sing for him. We both sang to eachother at the end of the song, and i felt like there was a special moment there for us. Like i might even be making another friend in this shit hole of a home. He didn't smile at first, but im sure by the end i had never been given a bigger one. And yeah...he's nice." My eyes widened as i realised how much i had said, and how breathless i had become.

"You like him." Ray had a giant smirk on his face as he pushed my shoulder lightly.

"Yeah.."

"I knew it!"

"No, i mean i like him as a friend." I argued but i knew it was too late to stop Ray from objecting every answer.

"Dude, your gay?"

"I don't know Ray. I wanna befriend him, but there's all these other thoughts."

"You'll figure it out soon buddy. I did and now i have a great relationship. Im happy." He smiled. Ray found a great boyfriend through the power of coffee, and now he new his place. I wanted that, but forever i will remain confused.

"Thanks."

"No problem. You wanna get a coffee, the drinks are on me?" Ray always knew how to cheer me up. "You might even meet someone."

"Um, sure...your awesome Ray thanks." I got up and switched of the game machine smoothing down my hair and slipping out of my flat with the frizz of hair that was my friend.

We stepped out onto the harsh streets of los angelos, and scuffed our feet down the pavement to starbucks, the whole time talking about relationships. And as usual most of it was centered around me, always. Frank Self-Indulgent Iero.

"What do you want before we go in?" Ray said.

"Um, just a strong coffee. Would be nice." I wondered if Gerard would like strong coffee too, or whether he even liked it at all. Those chapped lips had surely had touched some of that steeming brew.

GERARD'S POV:

I'd been at work for 2 hours now, and only had 5 left. I think my weakness of work was constantly staring at the clock, and burning my fingers on the hot water of the coffee machine. By now my fingers stung, and my eyes were hurting. Instead of preparing for work last night, i decided to stay up till three in the morning talking to myself on Mikey's answer phone, and reading over Frank's singing registration report around one hundred times. That left me with 10 minutes to chuck on my clothes and gather everything in the morning. Regret was now the only thing pulsing through my veins.

I heard the door bell chime, and immediately looked over, not caring if i looked like a drowsy tramp who had just stolen a workers outfit. And when i saw the two customers i actually cared. I stumbled back into the bin looking away from the people entering. A young man with frizzy hair..

..and Frank.

CHAPTER 5

FRANK'S POV:

As i scuffed my feet on the matted carpet i spotted a familiar face behind the counter. , or Gerard as i prefer. We both locked eyes in an embarrasing realisation that we were about to communicate infront of Ray. Ray obviously knew about Gerard, but didn't know that this was him. However, being Ray he probably could figure it out pretty easy. Time stopped for a moment as Gerard smiled vastly, his cheeks stained a light pink, and mine began to feel heated too. Before i knew it though, time continued and i watched Gerard stumble back in a daze into the coffee cup filled bin. I let out a loud girlish giggle as Ray stared at me in oblivion.

"You okay there dude?" Ray questioned.

"Yeah." I coughed straightening my jumper. "Splendid." I spoke in a posh tone, trying to keep my cool down and not manically jump in happiness that Gerard was here.

"Hello there young men! Can i take your order?" gave off a natural grin, as if this was a normal situation.

"Yeah thanks. Two strong coffee's, no sugar." Ray lent his elbows on the worktop casually, drumming his fingers on the glass pot of cookies.

"Small, medium or large?" Gerard looked at me this time, arching his eyebrows and sharing a questioning glance with me as Ray was looking down on the counter. 'My friend' i mouthed to him pointing at Ray secretively. 'Nice hair' he mouthed in response. I stifled a laugh and choked on my breath slightly laughing even more sending Gerard into fits of laughter. Ray then looked up and his eyes widened as he saw the state we were both in.

"Medium please." Ray stared at me with deep concern, like i had tooken pills or something. "You boys okay?"

"Were fine, sorry sir. Your order will be here soon, can i have your names?" Thank goodness, this is a guy who can cover up a situation perfectly! I swung back and forth on my heels hoping i wasn't the one to reply.

"Certainly! Frankie and ray." I huffed exaggerating my name slightly, hoping he would repeat it. He did.

"Frankie eh? What a cute name, suits you." Another compliment came unexpectedly flashing my way, and i smiled way to appreciatively back at Gerard. I could feel him grinning as he walked back to the coffee machines clumsily, treading on his own feet.

We made our way to the lounge, and fell into the soft leather couch with our worries planted into the cushions behind us.

"You paly with that guy up there Frank." Ray looked suspicious of the scene we had attempted to cover up. "Seems like you know eachother."

"Would you believe it if i told you it was my singing tutor?" I blurted out withought thinking about keeping it in my head.

"Your very friendly for a student that's for sure." He murmered. Sure, i liked Gerard, but he was right. We were very nice to eachother after meeting for one day. Our glances, laughter and talks we share. Even in front of friends who are clueless of the situation. He was naturally like that though, for sure. It sometimes seemed like he was begging for a friend, and he was merely attempting to hide how desperate he was. Maybe it was true, and maybe that was the reason i felt sad and earning for him. I stared at the swirling patterns of wood engraved in the table, and started to imagine what Gerard was really like. Were his smiles covering up something that he told no one else. Was he really that tranquil and buzzing. The case was that i probably just wanted to get to know him better. Or snoop right into his business could be correct.

Busy in my thoughts, i heard a rapping noise on the table and Ray's laughter filling my ears. I looked up and saw Gerard looking down at me with an empty tray, and the cofee's resting right by my head and Rays' hand. Ray was in a fit of laughter, as i realised he had been for the five minutes my head was down and my brain was clicking with dreamy thoughts.

"You okay there sir? I brought you your drinks." Gerard remarked sliding my drink into my open palm, the warm cup scolding my fingers.

"Ouch!" I flinged the coffee away.

"Sorry, i get a little impatient if i see a customer leaving there drinks for a long time. I love my coffee." He looked back at the clock and his gaze returned to mine. "Neglection of drinks...and i most definetely don't have the symptoms."

...A tumbleweed sounded from the silence we shared...

Ray shifted slightly on the couch before saying: "Um, im gonna head to the toilet. Be back." He smiled awkwardly and shuffled past us, completely dead silent. This was not like Ray.

"How's my favourite student, eh?" He said this completely casually as if he hadn't pointed out that he particularly liked me more than others.

"Tired and bored. Life has just been gradually steeping up, but now it's stopped..." I fiddled with my fingers, thinking back to my grandad, my guitar, my family..

Gerard.

"I probably shouldn't be telling you this anyway...sorry."

"No, it's fine i get the same anyway, but i shouldn't really be saying that either." He scratched the back of his head and reached over to touch my shoulder lightly. "Stay strong shorty." He flashed me a piercing smile and walked back to the counter. I grinned into my lap, the touch of his gentle hand still buzzing on my shoulder. My cheeks began to grow warm again as Ray stumbled back and looked at me questionly.

"Gerard?" He asked. I felt the heat of my cheeks and gulped nervously.

"NO...no. Um, the weather it's hot...you know? We should probably go."

"Dude, we've only just arrived and look at my coffee." He pointed to it and i realised it was full.

"Just kidding, silly!" I ruffled his fro and laughed nervously, not noticing how anxious i sounded.

"Well..." Ray sounded, and took a large gulp from his coffee. We silently sat there for a period of time, sipping on our scolding drinks, and occasionally sending eachother glances. Ray was acting up on me as the shy guy, when he usually was way more louder than this. Every so often, you would see him furiously tapping letters onto his phone from underneath the table, concentration lines wrinklin on his sweaty forehead. I didn't want to disturb him, so i kept quiet, constantly wondering what was wrong. As the silence continued, i felt something rustle on the material of the back of my jacket. The more i moved, the more uncomfortable and frustrated i got, so i curled my arm around and scanned for any crumbs. But instead i found a note...

Im the worst at writing this..anyway!

If your not busy with that exstetential crisis

then would it be possible if we met tonight, at six?

I'm lonely, that's the truth, and i want to discuss.

Anything you want to talk about!

Plus i want to get to know you better.

P.S- please forget the fact that im a teacher, im only 29.

(Please dont kill me that i extended there age so their old men!)

Thanks!

-Gxo

G, was that Gerard? It would explain the fact he patted my shoulder, which is around my back area. Oh, so he just patted me to get that note across. And there was me believing he had slight affections for me...DON'T BE RIDICULOUS FRANK! I mean, even if it doesn't mean he cares, i still have someone to talk to. Hopefully, tonight i can get to know him better. Even if it means we hate eachother after our guts have been spilt.

FRANK'S POV:

I ran my hands through my charcoal hair, stepping back onto the cold lamp-lit streets. I was wearing my iron maiden shirt, ripped jeans and smelt of cigerettes, as i don't have the strength to wash out my clothes every one time there worn. My eyeliner felt heavy on my eyelids, as i dreamed of closing them and running back home to my bed. But i had way more important things to do.

On my way to the coffee shop, i read through the letter in my mind. He was 29, and i was 28. It was so weird thinking that my teacher was only a year older than me. It probably felt strange because of the scenarios we had in school, where the teacher was old enough to be our parents, or even grandparents! I laughed to myself, turning another lamp-lit corner. He certainly knew how to write notes withought my face burning from the cheese. Or maybe i just wanted some cheesyness. Maybe..

GERARD'S POV:

I sat on the bench behind the coffee shop, in a deserted rusty old park. It was peaceful, and my head was buzzing constantly, including my fingers, which were now slapping eachother in an entanglement of sweat.

"Pick up your shit Gerard. Listen, just spill everything right there. He'll understand if you just rush everything. If not...run." I whispered to myself.

"Busy?" I heard a familiar voice say. I jumped as i saw Frank sit next to me laughing into his hands.

"Sorry, i'm nervous for no reason." I sat my shaking hands beside eachother, and breathed out heavily.

"Hey, don't be. I won't judge you for any reason, you should know im better than that." He touched my arms lightly and his pierced lip stretched into a comforting smile.

"So..should i just say everything?"

"Go ahead, i came here to get to know YOU better." He exaggerated you with a flick of his tongue, and straight away flashed a toothy grin at me.

"Right. When i was a young boy my father took me into the city to see a marching band, and there i saw the black parade. A parade of dead masked figures on a moving black podium. I was entranced by there costumes, the odd scenery and the wild music. Ever since then i have been obsessed with death, which is odd.

It came a time, where i had to go to middle school. And there i was the comic obsessed, nerd who liked D&D, Audrey Hepburn, Fangoria, Harry Houdini and croquet. I couldn't swim, couldn't dance and didn't know karate. So i said 'face it, im never gonna make it.' Every day was the same, getting beaten up by jocks and spat on by all the students in school. However, i was still obsessed with death, and suddenly music. It became a life line for me, including my grandma Helena who introduced all my favourite music to me. Sadly, she died and there came a time where every star that fell brought me to tears again. It was probably because my father was becoming more ill, and my mum was still arguing with him. School was failing, and the only thing i was good at was science. So i skipped, and skipped, and eventually left school. I was now 17, my mum had ran away, and my dad had lost the battle to cancer. So i lived with my uncle, and only friend. I was on a downward spiral, and only then did i have one resort. Music. I remember Helena telling me that 'if im mad, don't throw a punch, don't start a fire about it, don't shout about it. Sing, thats the most powerful weapon you have.' And then, it all started to piece together, that music was my future. All i knew in school is that music made me feel different from anyone i shared a locker with. Someone finally understood me, even if i didn't know them.

I began to meet people, and eventually started a band. My Chemical Romance. Me, my brother, my friend Bob, and other friend Ray. We lasted 6 years with three albums before finally breaking up. It was tragic, and i always knew it was the wrong decision. It was just i felt so depressed, like a shovel had just scooped out all my internal organs, and replaced it with a dead soul. Sometimes, i feel like i want to call them all back up and shout 'Hey guys! Wanna hook up for a final album?' We were great, you know that? Achieved our hopes and dreams. But now, no one remembers us, not even my brother, who just thinks im a stupid excuse for a human being. he cares, but only because he believes im suffering to a point where it's mental. Im not okay..." I coughed on my tears, as two of them slipped into the gaps in my mouth and i licked them up, the salt burning my tongue. I had literally just emptied my thoughts into a guy's head. And i'd only known him for two days. I felt silly.

"Your an incredible excuse for a human being." That was all Frank said when i had finished. He too had tears trickling down his cheeks but was smiling so brightly.

"I'm not."

"You damn well are Mr. Gerard Way! I have the rights to admit the truth." He shuffled forward and pulled me into a bone crushing hug. I held him too, and we sat there for minutes, hugging eachother. It was now raining, and our cheeks were pressed firmly against eachothers as we laughed. I pulled away and held his gaze.

"Who am i?" I whispered.

"A great man." He stroked my back.

"Who will i be?"

"The current frontman of My Chemical Romance. I'll help you in time, and do whatever it takes."

"Im so grateful...friend?"

"Friend." He nodded and pulled me in for a quick hug before wishing me a good night and trodding off, his hair and clothing drenched. And me smothered in happiness.

CHAPTER 6

"That's it, im kicking you out of here if you don't tell me what's up!" I shouted at Ray chucking the controller on my battered floor. It had been 2 hours since Ray had came over and he hadn't said anything apart from 'your fucking useless at this game.' So i thought, i need a threat, because he's been like this for a week now since the coffee shop. I know it wasn't me, and certainly not Gerard. He had been looking down at his phone in starbucks, and whenever we would bump into eachother at the park. His eyes never left it, apart from today. I had managed to persuade him to have a game with me and forget whatever shit was bugging him.

"Get your bag then, your out!" I was fed up of everything. Fed up of Ray giving me the silent treatment, and certainly fed up of being confused over my gender preference. Was i gay, and did i actually have feelings for Gerard. Yesterday was just so perfect, and his speech had brought me to tears, but it also made me confused. Did he say this to lure me into a trap and then leave me, or did he really see me as a person he could tell this to. I had been betrayed so many times i didn't know if i should trust him or not.

"Fine.." Ray stood up and towered over me like a huge boulder, and i sat back down leaning backwards.

"W-what?" I shuddered.

"I said FINE!" He yelled in my face, and then to approach the space on the bed next to me. His expression was so stern he could freeze hot water in seconds. His eyes were bleeding into mine as the atmosphere became very tense.

"He cheated on me, and i kicked him out..." His lip was trembling and his hands were shaking furiously in his tear stained lap.

"We-" I began to say.

"He just threw it all away, and after 8 fucking months! We did EVERYTHING together, and we promised eachother no lies. He wasn't that guy..he was so generous and kind. But, i lost it, and i don't know what i did!" The tears began to flow even more around his dark circled eyes. I wrapped my arms around his tall figure, stroking his side. He dove his head into my shoulder, and sniffled into it.

"Ew dude that's gross!" I chuckled, and i heard him laugh into the fabric of my shirt.

"Sorry Franks." He groggled, and brought his head back up to stare at me. "But the good thing is, straight after i met someone.."

"That quickly? Is that what gay relationships are like. Shees, you need to give me some lessons on it."

"We were always close friends, and i guess we always knew we had something for eachother. So he confessed, and now.."

"Now what?" I questioned his hand on my arm, shaking.

"Frank im moving to San Diego."

"Y-you w-w-what?" My stomach did backflips all of a sudden. He was going? I would have no one now. No one.

"I'm moving in with him seeing as San Diego is way better than this shithole town we live in." He joked, but i gripped the fabric on the front of his jacket firmly.

"You can't leave!"

"Listen Frankie we can still keep in contact right? You've got my number, and we can skype."

"You'll never want to see me again when your gone Ray. Your the only friend i have."

"You have Gerard silly. Plus your getting two lessons with him instead of one from now on. Isn't that great?"

"How?" I usually only had one i thought.

"I talked to your parents about my situation, so now you have two every week. Gerard said he would be plenty happy with teaching a talented man like you. I think you've got a keeper Franks'." He nudged my arm slightly.

"Keeper? Wha- h-he doesn't like me!"

"No he doesn't your right. Especially because of the way he talked about you to your parents last night!" He winked at me and giggled. The sarcasm was clear, however, i couldn't understand what kind of things he had to say about me. I had to know.

"I need to go buddy. I promise i'll see you soon." He pulled me into a huge bear hug and pulled out teary and smiling.

"Bye fro!" We both laughed before my bedroom door finally closed shut, and i blinked. He was gone, and the realisation had only just darkened over me. Now i needed to find a new friend, if i was going to make it through this whole 'struggling' faze. I picked up my guitar, and began to practice for tonights lessons.

GERARDS POV:

I sat at the paper-ridden desk, my teeth chewing on my lip harshly. Frank was arriving at 6:00pm for lessons tonight. 10 minutes. It was dark outside, even though it wasn't the evening, and i felt the breeze of air make my hair stand on its edges. I began to organize the room in a hurry. It was the third time me and Frank would have met and i believe we were getting closer and closer to getting to know everything about eachother. He was a lost young soul, and i knew from his smile he was hiding things. But i keep reminding myself to not make it obvious i care, just keep talking to him like a friend. Or just a teacher. That was the point, and still after the park scenario, and his warm arms wrapped around me, i still felt he didn't understand me. I shivered and dropped some papers as i yet again thought about the warmth of his fingers caressing the skin on my arms, and his chubby cheeks pressed against the harsh bone of my neck. It felt so nice, and good when that feeling ran over me. Someone caring and reaching out to me...and him.

"Oh Frank.." I groaned to myself, wanting him to be here and near me again. I inwardly sighed however, predicting i would never share such a close friendship with him. But im going to try and get to know him better.

" ." I turned around and saw Frank standing there, a cute cream guitar in his hands. He was smiling, the thin pink flesh stretching upwards, and branding an adorable brown fleece from the expected cold weather.

"Frank, have a seat young man." I smiled and sat in front of him staring at the guitar he began to strum on lightly.

"This is Pansy sir. She's kind of a close friend, and i named her after a nickname i was given."

"Well nice to meet you Pansy, im sure we'll be good friends." I joked reading the intricate lettering curving around the guitar.

"We're already friends so your welcome to her company."

"Friends?" I probably came across startled from the look on my face.

"Of course, after everything you told me at the park. We kind of formed a bond i thought."

"Yeah yeah, i know. So i'll always call you Frank?"

"And i'll call you Gerard?"

"Sure!"

"Want my number then?" He smiled baring all of his teeth, and held out a little slip with his number messily scratched onto it. I took it happily and brought my phone out, typing it up.

"First contact on my phone, how sad am i?" I stared at the empty folder of contacts lying on my phone screen.

"Really?"

"Apart from my brother, and the rest of the band members...yeah."

"Im not suprised, your like the grinch" He mocked and nudged my shoulder lightly scooting nearer to me on his chair.

"I hate you Frankie." I laughed, trying out the new nickname as it slid off my tongue.

"You too Gee, you too!" He kicked my leg slightly, and i winced kicking back. We remained there for a bit, in a fit of giggles and play fighting until i fell of the chair. With the harsh impact of me toppling off the furniture, he too fell and landed on top of me with a ThUmP. I gazed at him, feeling the soft flesh of his hands struggling on my thighs as he attempted to get up, and the sweaty denim off our jeans slapping together. As we both gazed at eachother we fell into a echo of giggles. My face fuzzed with a red glow, and i became breathless from the laughter and the proximity of Frank on top of me.

"Sorry about this." He said breathily, as he rolled off of me and i choked at the loss of weight and being able to gain my composture. We both sat up and lent against the chair. From the corner of my eye Frank's chest was thumping up and down and his face was a peachy pink. Probably from the impact of the fall..not me.

"Right then Frank. You came here for lessons?" I stood up and walked over to Pansy.

"Yeah, sorry. I believe im actually becoming social, you should embrace that." We both chuckled and continued with the lessons, which sadly ended quickly. As they say, time flies by when your having fun!

FRANK'S POV:

"Bye Gerard, until tommorow!" I waved goodbye to my teacher, and now trusty friend.

"Have a nice night Franks." He waved back catching my gaze before returning it to the screen on his phone.

I walked out of the old building and paced quickly back home. The lessons had been great, and there had actually been a moment of tranquility we shared that had left me completely flustered. Gerard was a perfect human being, and withought pretending to lie, my affections for him were growing stronger by the second. I couldn't say i loved him, but i always believed from the moment i saw him look up at me for the first time, sparks glinted slightly. I never understood what it would mean for me, or for my future, but now i had a rock. And it certainly wasn't dissapearing anytime soon.

I stepped up into the living room of my shabby rented house and stared across at the scenery. Some of the furniture and items in my house were vanished, and it smelt particularly familiar to my parents scent.

"Mum..dad. I know your there!" I yelled. From such a lovely moment in the day to this. Was this always going to be my consequence. If i have a really good moment, it has to be repayed with a sudden depressing event. This was it.

The phone began ringing and i jumped to it, running to the tabletop in the kitchen and answering it.

"Hello, Frank here." I murmered leaning against the cold marble.

"Frank it's your mum." I gulped silently, thinking about all the scenarios this call could lead to.

"Oh hi ma. What's wrong with my house, have you been here?"

"Actually Frank honey, your moving out."

"what...your joking right?" The pace of my heart quickened. She couldn't do this, and most definetely...why?

"Your grandfathers really ill honey, and we couldn't think of another way to pay for his operation."

"He's ill? WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME!" I was screaming down the phone right now. Whatever scenario, my parents would always be the one to tell me about this, and after as soon as it happened. Why were they being so cold?

"Were sure you can cope on your own, so we've left some money for you to get the nearest hotel for the night, and your auntie will take you to hers in the morning." She chimed down the phone, and i almost wanted to ask why she was so happy about this. Grandad was going to be ok, but still, neglecting your own son. I knew something like this would happen, especially like it did to Gerard when his mum left him withought even saying goodbye, or sorry. Poor Gerard...and poor me.

"I don't want to sleep in a fucking hotel, i want to sleep in my own bed, and most certainly not with that bitch you call my auntie!" I thought back to my childhood where i lived with my auntie the few years whilst my my dad was working abroad and my mum was probably having an affair with another man. They always appeared nice, but all they cared about was using me as a doll and wanting me to be famous so they could snatch all the money from me. And that goes for my auntie to, whom instead of giving me pocket money, would steal the pay checks i earnt from my work and then beat me if i argued once. I was not going to the hotel, or my auntie's. I would rather live on the streets for a lifetime then risk the torture and rejection of what my parents wanted.

"Don't you dare use that language you little rat. If you don't want to go to the hotel then you can live on the streets like the tramp you are!" She spat down the phone, and hissed with every letter she pronounced. When my mum was angry, it was very obvious, and she knew how to put someone in line with her harsh words. "Or sleep with your little singing teacher, im sure you'd like that."

"I will! I love him more than i could ever love you." I screamed and choked on the tears that flooded onto the counter top. My vision was blurred with tears, and i could hardly speak with the emptiness i felt.

"Fuck him while your at it before i get the chance to kill him off!" She yelled so loudly it felt like my ears were bleeding, as i fell to my knees and sobbed quietly.

"Dont kill him p-please d-d-dont!" I whined before i heard a snigger of laughter and the line cutting dead. I dropped the phone from my hands and sat there on the dirty floor. Where was i to go now? This wasn't my home, and she had clearly stated that herself. I heaved myself up and lent against the counter. I didn't have any credit so i couldn't call Gerard, so i decided i would sleep outside the building where my lessons are taught. Until Gerard my prince rescues me and i beg him to take me in. I didn't want to take sympathy for myself, but right now i did want to be by him. With his arms cradling me and his soft Jersey accent whispering in my ear. He would sing me to sleep instead of me crying myself to slumber.

"Oh Gerard." I groaned to myself, wanting him to be here and near me again. Right now i had to face the fact that i was homeless, and indeed a absolute failure with this downward spiral, which was now spiralling at a incredibly quick rate.

And then i got up and walked, as far as my weak knees would take me...

A/N* Sorry if your finding this all very sad. It will all be over in a couple of chapters dont worry :)

CHAPTER 7

GERARD'S POV:

I groaned from the noise of the sound of fists banging at my door. It was the morning after the lessons, and i was feeling splendid, however im not a morning person.

"Wait there!" I yelled, chucking the covers over my bed, and creeping to the door, flicking down the switch on the coffee machine as i walked. I smoothed down my shirt and opened the door lazily. A tall man stood there, wrinkles sculpting his face and grey hair running down into wispy sideburns. He was holding a stack of paper, fingering at the ink ridden sheets.

"I hate the feeling of paper on my skin, usually results in paper cuts. Dont you?" He questioned with a thick British tone. Oh god, next he'll be offering me tea and crumpets from china plates!

"Excuse me..." I said questioning his greeting "Why did you knock on my flat? My hands ran back through the greasy bristles on my hair, and i yawned, making it obvious i wanted him to bugger off.

"Were evicting you from your flat . We gave you many warnings that your house rent had risen, however, you ignored them." He looked so casual, stretching his arm out to pass me the unsigned forms. I was by now fuming with rage. I didn't recieve any notice, about how i had to pay more to live in my home. My hands clenched into tight balls, as i snatched the crippled forms from the elder mans hands, and scowled at him furiously.

"Sick and twisted isn't the word for your behaviour. I did not recieve ANY notice, neither did you send me any!" He laughed after i spoke, and pointed to a sentence on the paper.

'After sending you a collection of emails, we are sad to inform you that your ignorance to them has led to you being evicted to your apartment. We expect you to have left the apartment by 10.00am tommorow, with all the items you wish to take. Any items left will simply be scrapped. If you are unsure of what your next move will be with houses, please contact us.

Thanks,

Bellevile Goverment.

"It makes sense i guess. I never read my emails." I murmered, staring down at the sheets.

"Well then sir, i shall be making my leave. Don't get into to much of a dilly-dally about all of this." He strutted off, his spectacle bouncing up and down on his eyelids.

I sat back down and grabbed the coffee from the machines dispenser. I could now claim myself as homeless, and dearly confused. I needed to go to the music building and inform Frank about my case, before we skip lessons. Then i needed to pack. But before evrything, i needed to know where i was going. It seemed unfair, but there was a slight possibility that Mikey would take me in. He was always so helpful, and i was wishing he would understand the state i was in. Since the message i had left on my phone, Mikey had text me back with a simple message reading:

'Sorry i didn't answer your call Gee. I have been a bit busy, and have only recently got a cut in my pay. Everything is fine however, and you'll be pleased to know i now have a flat mate whom is my current partner. You'll love him trust me, and when i next see you, you need to show me your lover. I bet you have one (; Mikes x'

I smiled, thinking back to the message, and feeling proud that Mikey had found someone. He was exactly like me, and was always vulnerable to relationships. Hence why he wasn't in any because he was so scared of being betrayed. He had always told me at every visit we shared, that i would find someone, and the reason why i had never been in a trusty relationship for forever, was because i was just waiting for the perfect person to come along. He said it would be when i least expected it, and it would last for a long time. Mikey was a man of his word, and hardly ever lied, so i've always believed him when he said it. Im just still waiting for that guy to come along. Or maybe i've already found him...

I shook my head and stood up, remembering that i had a hell of a lot of business to deal with. This whole situation was serious, and i didn't know why i wasn't breaking down or crying. Maybe it was because i secretely hated where i lived and i just wanted to escape to the beautiful scene of San Diego with Mikey. I nervously tapped the number on my phone, pushing the packet of cigerettes away from me and resisting the healing intoxity of them. I waited on the edge of my seat for Mikey to pick up.

"Hello Mikey here."

"Mikes it me Gee. I have a huge problem, um.." My hand dragged down my face as i sighed heavily, slouching further down my sofa.

"Hey bro, what's up?" He sounded casual, and not prepared for the upcoming news,

"The rent of my flat rose, and aparentely i got messages of the rise, however i never read my emails. So now, because i payed short, i've been evicted from my flat, and have to live by 10.00am tommorow." My voice was shaking, and i began to slowly break down as i finished my sentence.

"Gerard, you idiot! Have you got anywhere to go?" He spoke with an edge to his voice, which was very strict. He was obviously concerned abotu me sleeping on the streets for my future.

"Nowhere...i-im stuck." I was thinking of a way to ask Mikey if i could stay round his for the time being, but he had answered my thoughts.

"Get your stuff ready Gerard, i'll pick you up at 9.00 tommorow. Before you ask if it's fine, it is. I would never let my brother suffer like that, i would rather jump of a cliff of exploding dynamite." He laughed down the phone, and my childhood came rushing back to me. Mikey's rare awkward side smile that he only held around me. His bone crushing, hugs and fluffy hair that buzzed around his face. I was lost for words thinking how i could finally spend time with my brother, in a sunny and tranquil atmosphere. I could finally escape my cruel past, and live a new life again. The only problem after this was Frank. Perhaps i could persuade him to come with me, if Mikey would say yes. Frank was fine however, he had a home. I was even confused about why i wanted such a new friend to join me in my new life. Surely it was too personal.

"Your amazing, i love you Mikes!" I fell into a fit of laughter, as the atmosphere buzzed around me. I was leaving this deadbeat town, and reaching out to a different life. Now it was me and mikey and his lover. Maybe even Frank if i could negotiate with him. Now everything was slowly forming together.

"Love you too bro, love you too. Get to work now buddy, see you soon!" His voice filled the room before the line rung dead. Now it was time to go to the singing hall and break the news to Frank. It was going to be harsh, and painful, but hopefully it wouldn't be a goodbye scenario.

I was so near the building and i could tell from the strong scent of cigerettes, and filth crawling the sidewalk. I hummed along to the sound of my steps as i turned the corner to the building. But as i turned i spotted Frank. He was sad there in a heap of dirt and slumber. His eyes were bloodshot and circled in black, and his hair was screaming on its edges. His clothes were half ripped at the seems and the middle, and his hands shook violently.

"Frank!" I ran over, and knelt next to him staring at his frail tiny figure as he looked up at me lazily.

"Y-your here. I've been w-waiting a-a-all night.." He stuttered out quietly, and gripped the shoulder of my jacket tightly shaking it. "There are so many rats a-and h-horrible s-s-stuff out at night."

"Your so stupid." I laughed looking at the ground, my hands now shaking as well as i touched his greasy scalp stroking the thin strands. "Why are you here?"

"My grandad was ill, so my parents took all my money to pay for his operation. They said i could go to the nearest hotel for the night with my leftover cash, and in the morning my auntie would pick me up. I ignored them though, because my auntie is awful and i can't stand following ym parents orders. It all was just to much, and brought back the past. So i went here, and thought i would wait for you to save me from it all." So he was hiding things behind that smile of his?

"Im so sorry Frank. Sorry for not coming sooner, or saving you from all of this shit..." My hand dragged down his cheek and rested on the soft skin of his bare arm, where the sleeve was ripped. He was wrecked, and ruined, and had been messed with something silly. He really was a lost young soul, and right now i needed to be his rock to lead him out of the dark. His gorgeous face was melting in sorrow, and it killed me to see him this way...wait. Did i just say gorgeous? What was happening with me. Do i like this guy?

"You came though, and you didn't give up on me like they all have. I always knew you cared." He grinned weakly and i managed a smile back as our knees knocked gently together.

"Frank listen. A lot of stuff has happened...i can't explain it. Today i was evicted from my flat for an unfair reason, and it seems that the both of us are just being neglected now. The world obviously hates us, you think. I thought it was all over, but it isn't." His eyes widened in shock, and the veins in his fingers tensed.

"W-what, you too? What are you going- I mean what are WE going to do?" He looked down at his lap now covered in dirt and a few tears silently fell from his blotchy eyes. I reached my hand to cup his chin and brought it up to look at me. His face matched pure sorrow. All these feelings and emotions i had were bubbling inside of me. The most confusing one was lust. I was finally staring into the eyes of a human i could truly call beautiful. His mannerism, and looks. I wasn't gay, but i felt like he was making me turn that way with that smile, puppy dog eyes, and cute giggle.

"Frank, my brother is taking me in. He lives in San Diego, and it's great there. Im not the only one going, because your coming with me." I realised what i had just said. And how i had invited him to stay in, to him, a strangers house withought permission. Right now, i couldn't care less, for i had pulled Frank into my arms and he was near me. He nestled his head into the crook of my neck and sniffled, which tickled.

"Ah!" I giggled out. The vibration of my laugh bouncing of the collision of our chests pressed up against one anothers in an embrace.

"You smell nice." He chuckled and bit at my neck, in a playful manner.

"That hurt too!" I shouted pulling back and squeezing his biceps with were strong and hard. We both looked up and Frank bit on his tongue, supressing a mighty laugh.

"I have to live with you now." He said cocking his head to one side.

Me too shortstack." I said imitating his actions by moving my head to the side.

"Were both gonna hate eachothers guts by the end of this."

"You know, sometimes you actually speak the truth."

"Gerard everyone, grade A douche." He applauded speaking to a empty audience, and desolate street.

"You better deal with it because im the only friend you have."

"Im your best friend, and your worst enemy." He said ticking of both sides with his now still fingers.

"Yeah..i think that suits." I nodded and stood up, grabbing his sweaty palm and feeling a shudder run through me as our hand met. I ignored it though and we continued to walk back to my house. Confused, lost, happy, and alive.

FRANKS POV:

My whole body tingled as we entered Gerards apartment. We had shared such an intimate moment, and he had been so warm about it. I was now living with him, his brother and partner. Gerard didn't even hesitate when i told him my situation, and just simply took me in. After this we held eachother for a while, and perhaps i slipped up slightly with some playful actions. He still accepted my weird ways, and our giggles continued to fill the empty spaces in my life. No matter how cheesy you think that sounds! I never thought i was gay, but it seems like the more time i spent with Gerard, the more i was falling for him. His cute giggle, stubby blonde hair, weird ways, and life story. Even though i haven't brought it up since, i will help him get his band back together, whatever it takes.

"Here is the hell-hole, and my past life." He indicated to his house, which was quite empty and stunk of charred tobacco. I sniffled inwards trying to block out the smell, and coughed from the dust. "Sorry, i know..this is why im glad to get out of here."

"You leave by tommorow?" I asked sitting on the sofa and making myself comfy.

"Mikey is picking us up at 9.00am, so yeah. I'll sleep on the couch, and you can take my bed." He said. The whole while he spoke he was picking up items around his house, and stuffing them into crippled carboard boxes. I stared at him whilst he did so, admiring how he chose to wear tight jeans, and the effect it had on his backside. Why was i having these thoughts? Honestly, he was driving my mind round the bend.

"Awesome, and thanks. I prefer beds to sofa's, and certainly stone hard tarmac. He laughed, and i saw him bite his lip as he continued to pile stuff into the boxes, his cheeks tinted a light glowing pink.

Once he was finished packing everything, he sat down next to me and lent his head to the side on the soft velvet. I turned the same way, and we both began talking about our interests.

"Let me get to know you better." Gerard said softly.

"Seriously, im nothing special."

"Dont fish for compliments, because you'll know my answer to your self-mockery." He rolled his eyes, and chewed on his lip, making my feet jiggle, and my stomach do flips.

"Eh, ok. I like guitar, rock music, Coca-cola, Black Flag, Italian food. Im anti-social, and a teenage reject." I listed. It took me a while because you know when someone asks you to list stuff, and your mind just goes blank. Yeah, i get thay.

"I love Black Flag there so awesome." His face lit up and my face heated slightly.

"I wish i knew your band. I mean you play my favourite Genre of music."

"We were a very big band, and even i can't explain the breakup. I guess that's why i want it back, because it feels wrong. We were always labelled by the media as an 'emo cult band', and that we made people kill themselves."

"I'd say bullshit." I retorted, suprised about how much negative attention he recieved.

"The fans loved us though, and our music lived through there screams. We saved lives, and that suprised me. In my childhood i dreamed of playing at some huge venues, and we ended up playing there in front of millions. I'd like to think we were never forgotten, and that the attention i recieve in public means we will always be remembered. The fans were distraught at the breakup, and we created so many distruptions i almost felt i should of told them it was a joke...and i guess now i just want to be back with them all. You know? For one last album to prove to the media we weren't some failure, and to my family and all the fans that there loved."

"That is an amazing idea, and an amazing journey. I would love to join you."

"Really?" He said looking me straight in the eye.

"Really." I said lowering my eyebrows.

And with that i slouched into a deep slumber, not realising it wasn't the evening, and that this was not my bed.

'Knock knock'

I squinted my eyes open to hear a rattling at the door. I groaned, remember the events from yesterday, and wondering why i felt so warm. Looking up i realised i had my head resting on Gerard's shoulder, and was cradling his hand with my dirty fingers. He was snoring and had his arm wrapped around me, pulling me closer. I jumped slightly, my face turning red and my stomach filling with butterflies. Gerard looked so cute when he was asleep, and i really wanted to pull him closer and sleep with him all day.

"Frank..dont go." I heard him whimper, and i giggled slightly poking his chest.

"Im right here silly!" I said, him jumping at the sound of my voice. Realising his arm was still loosely around me he removed it, playing with his fingers as his face flushed brightly.

"Uh, hey." He spoke, obviously embarassed.

'knock knock'

The door sounded again, and before we had time to answer it, it flew open and a slim figure walked in.

"I told you not to-...MIKEY!" Gerard screamed like a little girl, and ran up to him as Mikey twirled him around off his feet and hugged him tightly. They stood there for a bit, Gerard murmering into Mikey's shoulder, and him smiling and nodding.

"Nice to meet you Frank" Mikey grinned sweetly holding out a hand to shake "Gerard told me about your ordeal, and its clear i can take you in."

"Thanks dude, you don't know how much i appreciate it" I grinned giving him a hearty hug.

"C'mon then, better sooner than later." Gerard reminded us. And so we grabbed everything we needed and went.

Off to San Diego...

CHAPTER 8

GERARD'S POV:

I sat in Mikey's van next to Frank, tired and cold. Frank's eyes were still blotchy and red from the night before, and i was trying my best to spark conversation with him so he didn't fall asleep. Whilst i was rocking Frankie awake, Mikey was talking to us about how skittles can be nutritious in some aspects.

"It's true Gee trust me, i've been eating them solid and dropping down pound by pound." I just sniggered back, as his argument became less valid and true.

"We there yet at the airport?" Frank snorted, clearly tired. I laughed and nodded as Mikey coincedently turned the corner to the drive thru to the building.

"I fucking hate planes Mikes!" I whined, remember the time i was forced to fly out to his house to run an errand for my mum as a anxious teenager. I almost got sent home for not looking overage, and for keeping scissors in my bag. I was only using them for craft uses, and it helped if i bought any clothes and couldnt rip off the tag.

"Take a chill pill, you'll be fine, you've done it before. Plus when you get there you can meet my amazing boyfriend!" He clapped his hands before parking up in the space near the building. He was smiling like a fool with the thought of his partner on his mind. It made me envious of him, and i wondered what it would be like to think so dearly of someone like that who shared the same affections with you.

"Your so mushy!" Frank added, a hint of jealousy in his eyes, as he moved his head from the head rest and jumped out of the car.

"He's so gorgeous though." Mikey began his long woeful sentence about his wonderful boyfriend. We continued to walk through the checkouts, and ignore him because of how frustrating and cheesy the words he said were. "And yeah." Mikey finished, realising we now were completely unaware of his words.

It too us a while, but eventually we managed to get through the scanners and checkouts with no pauses. Apart from the staff having to retreive a stool for Frank to stand on whilst being probed in the male scanner. It was fairly hilarous in all respect. Afterwards we waited at the benches as each flight was called. Me and Frank had a few tickle fights, which distracted some attendants who looked at us like we were crazy. But all was fine, apart from my aching sides, and the feeling of Frank's body heat all over my sides. We then had our flight called, and made our way through the tunnel and into the plane, in which we all sat next to eachother. There was a row of three seats, and i decided to sit furthest from the window, because i hate flights. Also to make Mikey and Frank spark conversation with eachother.

"I think im gonna shit myself, so whoever is below us on the ground, better watch out." I said my hands gripping tight at the arm rests.

"There is no hole at the bottom of the airplane toilet Gee, i know mum told you that, but she was always the one to bullshit." Mikey leaned across to talk to me, and laughed at my stupidity. I grinned down at my lap blushing slightly.

"Aw your blushing!" Frank remarked, and patted my cheeks slightly making the heat of my cheeks becoming even redder. "You look like a beetroot." He laughed rustling my hair. I turned my face away and then looked back sticking my tongue out at him.

"You love it when i play with your hair really." He said looking down at his phone, a smirk on his dimpled face.

FRANK'S POV:

I looked down on my phone and scrolled across my homepage until i came to google's toolbar. I clicked on it and typed in 'My Chemical Romance'. I waited for it to load, then clicked on images, scrolling down slowly. There were pictures of Gerard, his brother, a pudgy blond man and a tall guy with a brown afro. I adjusted the size on one of the pictures, where Gerard had black hair and fangs. He was in a rebellious pose, with his fingers slanting sideways and pointing near the screen. His hazel eyes glinted at the corners, and his frail skin looked earning to be touched. Withought thinking i traced the pixels of his face on the screen and grinned. He suited black hair, and blonde hair, but i think i would die if his hair was red. I imagined Gerard with long greasy red hair, standing in the shadows of an empty room, in a innapropriate pose. I thought of my fingers dragging endlessly down the thin strands of hair, and whispering his name in his ear, underneath the chocolate brown hair coming through his scalp. It made my heart pump faster, and my tongue tie and become squeamish. This has to be a reality, especially if he were to reprise a last album with his band members. Back to the members i stared at the picture. They all stood there, but one seemed strangely familiar, and looked like Ray. His dark brown hair, curly fro and thick lips. When i thought back to the park, i remembered Gerard saying one of his band mates was called Ray. I pushed back on my chair in shock, and felt like yelling in suprise. I never knew Ray would do something like that, and why didn't he tell me. Was he moving because of this, and now because of his partner? To escape his musical past, and reach the height of another town. If so, i was sad he lied to me, even if he did have a partner, i was furious and confused why he didn't mention being in a band. Also, i was aggrivated i never knew they existed, i was always ridiculous like that. I was never one to pay attention to the media. Sitting up in my chair, i fiddled with my hands, wondering where Ray was right now. What was he doing, and was he enjoying being out of my company?

"We are close to landing, please fasten your seatbelts as we land. Thankyou for flying with us." I heard the buzzing of the intercom running through my ears and groaned. I had obviously fell asleep soon after Gerard, who had dribble seeping down his chin as he woke up. It was adorable though, and i wanted to wipe it off his chin and kiss him till he was wide awake. Why was i thinking that? I had woke up and still felt a tingle around him even when my body was only just half awake. It felt weird, but i loved the feeling surging my body alive.

"C'mon sleepy head lets get to Mikey's" Gerard moaned but still stood up and lazily shuffled down the carpet and out of the plane. After that i was sure he had woken up, and was able to socialize properly.

"I hate morning's." He whined, gripping on the sleeve of my jacket like a moany seven year old girl.

"It's three in the morning you twat!" I laughed as he looked at his watched 'ooing' at the relisation of the time.

"I knew that, i was just testing you." He wagged his finger at me.

We continued to skip our way to Mikey's house, listening to Mikey talking about San Diego and how much we'd love it here. He pointed out everywhere and everything we walked past, giving us a full detailed explanation and then going on to explain the time he 'did something naughty there'. It bored the both of us silly, and Gerard constantly reminded him that he had been told about these embarassing incedents before, about a million times!

"Were here boys! I don't have to say much about this beauty, just that i'd rather die then let it burn down."

"You have serious problems if you care that much about this building. I mean i'd give my life up for music...but still." Gerard spoke. I looked up at the giant mansion of Mikey's house, and thought he obviously had worked hard to earn it. It was a cream and blue colour, with flowers lining the front patio decked with a large mint swing and love seat chair behind those tall black gates. There was a balcony on the second floor of the structure which was lined in glass framed in flower italics. It was all so beautiful, and it made me excited just to enter it.

"This is just perfect." I marvelled looking all around me.

"Isn't it just!" Mikey boasted back, earning a groan from Gerard who was quickly jet lagged.

We walked in as Mikey opened the chocolate brown door for us, as we stepped into the huge all with a binding white staircase covered with small potted palm trees. I gasped at the fortune of this and how muc better it was compared to my shitty house at home. As i stepped through the hallway, Mikey hopped off explaining that he needed to make a phone call, and told us we could make ourselves at home. He also said his partner would be arriving soon, and he would make some time for a full introduction and tour around the house. We both complied and scurried to the leather sofa curling round the giant room. Me and Gerard looked back at eachother when we sat grinning like idiots at how comfortable we had become from an abnormal situation back at Bellevile. He gently took my palm in his for a second, stroking it lights and placing it on his chest. My face heated more then it had ever before, and tingles hit my body as his finger paced the veins on my hand. I shivered at the warmth of his skin, but he didn't notice, still smiling at me.

"Im so happy for you, and for me...i truly mean it. You are the bravest guy i have ever met, and i hope that we can start afresh from this day, in a new life. Im excited, and i have so many adventures and stories im sure we can share." He let go of my hand, and the tingling ended. My heart was still pulsing quickly, and i nodded back at him when he finished.

"Thankyou to you and your brother from taking me away. I needed this, i really did."

"It was a right shithole i must admit." He laughed and we rested our heads on the back of the leather, continuing to talk about the house. Soon after we heard a pound on the door, and Mikey scurrying to open it. We both stood up nervously, aware that his boyfriend had arrived and waited impatiently. Mikey came in not long after the knock, a figure treading anxiously behind him.

"Gerard, Frank this is my boyfriend." The shadow moved from behind Mikey and took his hand, as Mikey kissed his cheek gently smiling warmly. The man had curly brown hair, and plump lips. He was tall and sturdy, and looked extremely familiar. I couldn't put my finger on it though.

"N-nice to meet you." He stuttered, and i immediately recognised his voice.

"Ray?..."

CHAPTER 9

FRANK'S POV:

Ray and i stood there, completely ignoring the fact that Gerard and Mikey were wide eyed and staring at us. I looked up and down at Ray in his well fitted suit and grey tie, with his frizzled hair tamed down, and his hand stiffenening in Mikey's. I didn't think about it, but i could guess my mouth was probably wide open right now.

"I'll leave you two to it." Mikey whispered in Ray's ear, looking concerned, like he was not expecting my reaction to be so abrupt. He knew about me being Ray's friend too? He gestured for Gerard to come with them, and before leaving he rubbed my shoulder, and smiled slightly. I grinned back, but my stomach was churning even more now. From the discovery in the plane, Ray's leaving farewell, and him standing hear now dressed like a doll with his pretty and posh boyfriend.

"Listen F-frank...i can explain it all." He stuttered out walking nearer to me.

"You fucking bet your ass you can." I said a bit too loudly, getting slightly ticked from the whole situation happening around me. Just when i leave to escape everything, some problem i never realised existed has hatched up to come and bite me right in the neck.

"Listen, i'll tell you everything. Do you want to get a coffee?"

"And we'll talk there huh?" He nodded, and i shuffled my way out of the door, him trailing behind of me. From the corner of my eye i could see his head was down, and he looked like he was close to breaking into pieces. We continued the journey, at a silent pace and eventually arrived withought exchanging a word to eachother.

"You can sit, i'll order."

"It's the least you can do." I muttered under my breath, a buzz of emotions still racking at my head. Soon after my rude comment, Ray arrived back with two steaming cups of coffee. We both stared at eachother awkwardly before anyone spoke.

"Im sorry i never told you all of this before."

"Including the fact you were in a major band."

"You hear?"

"Damn right i did!"

"Ok let me explain everything. I was young okay, and i know i was stupid not to tell you, but i was scared i would be judged. You have always been a close friend, so i never reallly understand why i didn't feel like i could trust you enough to tell you that. But i'd been through a lot you know? Im sorry i didn't say, but my mum passed away when i was younger and withought any love or friends i just got turned away at every open door. I would constantly befriend people and then after some fun and games they would kick me out. So with you i was suprised i was finally being treated different. Same with Mikey, and after the incident with not telling you, i've learnt to trust him. Im just sorry i never felt like i could tell you. I was having a hell of a time and i also thought if i told you it would be to much to take in, with the rest of stuff you had going on in your crazy life. Overall, it's a shit excuse..but yeah." He managed to spark a small grin, and i leaned over on the counter sighing lightly.

"Oh god Ray. I don't know whether i should forgive you or get mad." He sniggered slightly, and i chuckled back. "Ok i guess i can." I reached my hand forward and he took it shaking back.

"I appreciate it Frank i really do. Mikey will be glad to."

"As long as there is no more lies Ray, cause i can't stand it!"

"No more, i swear." He grinned, and we walked out of the shop him dismissing me to go back to Mikey's house.

I walked across the crushed leaves whistling lightly. I had to take a different route back, and thank gosh i had been down San Diego before. I knew my way back, and it was through a forest covered in autumn leaves. It looked so beautiful, all brown and firey red as i skipped through the grass. I fell into my thoughts the further i delved, and soon started to imagine me and Gerard here. Under a blanket of stars, out in the open field next to the edge of the forest, hands linked and eyes locked on one another.

'"Your eyes remind me of ones only an angel could have." Gerard had said lustfully staring into my eyes, my cheeks burning bright red.

"Say some more poetry to me.." I whispered back, our shoulders bumping gently together.

"I'd love to my darling, but i would rather share this perfect time with you sneaking a kiss." I looked down at my lap sniggering, feeling his slender fingers reach to cup my chin and bring it up.

"You didn't have to ask if you just wanted it." I bravely replied toothily smiling as he leaned forward and...'

"What the!?.." I yelled feeling my feet slip underneath the ground, and sliding into a muddy ditch. Groaning i hit the floor with a load thump, my legs clicking inwards and the slosh of mud hitting my face. I looked up, realising whilst in my dreams i had falling into what looked like a deeply dug hole. The light was fading from the gaps in the wailing trees, and i slouched downward beginning to cry into my lap. Why was i constantly becoming distracted by Gerard? Why was i becoming so attached to him that everything i did had to result in something bad because of my thoughts towards him. It was ridiculous how obsesed i was becoming with him, even though i had no idea my true feelings towards him. Although, i believe in a matter of time something will happen that will really show how i feel for him. I looked back up as the sky darknened orange, and began to yell.

"Help help!" My throat was burning from the volume of my voice "Gerard! Mikey! Ray! Its Frank help!" I began to cough and started to wheeze. It was useless. What were they even doing right now, i mean surely Ray was going to come back down this way soon. I hoped that he would arrive before it became dark.

What the heck have i done?

CHAPTER 10

RAYS POV:

"Mikey baby im here." I called to Mikey sitting on the park bench with his hood draped over his face, and signature stud glasses on. He looked up and smiled, knowing that i had planned this conversation.

"You alright Ray?" He spoke softly and pulled me into a hug, rubbing his chin on my shoulder. I then sat down and looked deeply into his eyes sighing. I hated having to bottle everything up, and for me that was with Frank. I could of told him more, but really all i had to say was stuff had happened and that i was sorry. As we have always been close friends, he automatically accepted my apology, and left, hopefully in a good mood. I expected him to be home now, in relief that he finally knew what was bugging me. We both knew however, that we needed to discuss the band, for it had shocked him silly, and i believe he is yet to compose himself. That's pretty much what i came here to talk to Mikey about. The whole band situation, and aside from just Frank..him and Gerard's relationship. Withought complicating it, i had seen enough to know they were meant for eachother. Those silly yet cute glances at eachother, and how they always cover eachothers back in these situations. I also knew that Frank did love him to bits. Yeah, Frank was certainly confused, and he had the right to be. But i am sure that in no time, he will recognised his true feelings for Gerard. I know he likes him, especially because of the way he spoke about him when they first met. I had never seen someone smile more in my entire life. Also, i had to add how quickly his mouth was moving, to fit all the compliments into one conversation.

"Ray?" Mikey ahd raised his voice, shaking my shoulder.

"Uh huh...sorry Mikes just got a bit fucked in some train of thought of mine."

Right, so...you wanted to talk about?..." I shuffled closer to him, smelling the sweet scent of flowers, which he applied every morning ever so feminine.

"Frank and Gerard, and everything with them."

"Well that situation is far beyond me, i think they will forget us whilst they stay here. I certainly know for sure that somethings going on." I grinned, but shook my head back, reminding him that they were just friends, but adding that there DEFINETELY is something happenening here.

"Im really not sure myself, but i have quite the idea. I really think, you should bring this up with Gerard at tonight's dinner, after everyone excuses themselves. He is sure to give away a certain key event we can get information from, and after we can work with that and get them together. It's not exactly a plan, but i feel they want it to happen."

"I'll talk to him then babe, and you can tone down Frank from the excitement of Gerards face." We both chuckled, and laced our fingers together, feeling the sticky warmth of or sweat in eachothers palms.

"Your so great at this!" I grinned.

GERARD'S POV:

Where was he, it was getting late? I was sitting on the bed of the guests bedroom, my fingers hitting at eachother. I was dead nervous of where Frank could be, and why he couldn't of gotten back yet. Mikey and Ray had arrived back at the time they said they would, and soon i would be called down for dinner. I was pretty sure i was meant to be concerned that he probably wouldn't be joining us. The sunlight would go down soon after dinner, at i was edging towards running out the door to look for him. I knew i should wait though, for he could just come bursting through the door right now.

"Gerard, dinner is being served. I'll see you down there." My thoughts ended when he called me down, and i glared up at him through my long eyelashes.

"Is something wrong Gee?"

"No nothing Mikes, i was just wondering where Frank was.." He chuckled and patted my shoulder.

"Stop keep worrying about him! Im sure he is just looking around at his new home, i would if i was him." Before i knew, he had vanished downstairs, and i was soon to scurry down after him.

"Lets make this a dinner to remember!" Mikey raised our glass as we seated ourselves at the glass table. Our wine glasses chinked together and i brought the smooth liquid to my lips, savouring the warm but bitter taste.

"There's a first time for everything." Ray chuckled, as he watched me bite my lips from the wines unique flavour. Mikey joined in with a laugh, and i watched between the two. How i longed to have such a perfect relationship, or at least stable one. I wanted to laugh constantly and not care who watched, and hold someone close withought them running away. I longed for that, and there were times i wanted to scream to the world my feelings. I wanted to tell Mikey too what i felt for Frank, but i was constantly holding back. I didn't know whether i truly loved the boy or not, but something in my heart was dragging me towards him. I didn't want to leave that feeling alone, and i always hope every day, my heart will help me get closer and closer to the answer, to help me find what these feelings mean.

"Gerard." I looked up at Mikey who had a concerning look on his face. I had obviously drifted of again, because Ray had left the table quietly and now it was just the two of us staring back in tow.

"Y-yeah." My knees knocked into one another.

"We need to talk...now."

*Im SO sorry i haven't updated in ages, and that this was a really short chapter. I thought i would just write this filler chapter, because the next one is going to be filled with stuff! Thanks 3