45 Hacks with an Axe

Some people want to know how Nearly-Headless Nick died. This is my take on his death, in his view, based on JKR'S poem.

I am Sir Nicholas, known to many Hogwarts students as "Nearly Headless Nick." This is because I was "beheaded". Or at least, I was sentenced to be beheaded, but since my head never really left my shoulders, you couldn't exactly call my death a beheading. But maybe I should explain why it came to that, the reason I was sentenced to be beheaded.

It was a lovely autumn evening, so I decided to walk home from work instead of apparate. I decided to take a shortcut through a park near my home, and as I was strolling along there, I ran into a lady I knew.

"Excuse me, Sir Nicholas, but I could really use your help." The lady said.

Now, being a true noble Gryffindor, I couldn't deny this lady my assistance, so I asked, "What seems to be the problem?"

"My teeth are quite crooked, and this is paining me so. If only you could straighten them, it would be so appreciated." She replied.

"I don't know if I can, but I'll try my best." I said, being the ever-noble Gryffindor.

Then, I tried to perform a spell to straighten her teeth, but I made a dreadful mistake, and wouldn't you know it, a rather large and unseemly tusk began to grow out of her face. Immediately the dear lady began to scream. I tried to tell her that I could fix it, but she was too upset. It was only a simple mistake, and I probably could have fixed it if only she hadn't been thrashing about and screaming so. Of course, all this thrashing and screaming attracted much attention.

Soon, authorities arrived, and as it was not proper to hex a lady, especially in those time during which I lived, I was in great trouble. I tried to explain that it was an accident, but the law would not listen, and the lady, being quite upset at me, was not about to tell them so. The law was very strict for such offences as these, so soon I was sentenced to be hanged.

I was kept in custody until the next morning. Usually, during this time, the axe would've been sharpened, but the rock used to sharpen the axe had been misplaced, so that night it was not sharpened.

The next morning at dawn, I spoke to a priest, who brought me out to the block where I was to be beheaded. The man that was to behead me was wearing a black mask, and he told me to get down on my knees, so I did as I was told, although I was afraid of the death that would soon befall me.

"This may sting a bit." The masked man said. I flinched as he swung the axe into the air, but when he brought it back down, I found that as the axe was so blunt, it had not nearly severed my head; in fact it had barely done anything at all, although it hurt a great amount.

Then the man started to hack at my neck, telling me that it wouldn't take long. He was wrong. It took him forty-five hacks and whacks until I died, and my head was still not separated from my shoulders. The most painful experience of my life was dying.