Wish It Were My Arms

Summary- Zero always knew Kaname was something special to Yuuki, but there was always some part of him that didn't like her in that man's arms… ZeroYuuki one-shot.

This is my first VK fic, I'm a new convert, I can't believe I waited so long to get into VK after I've heard nothing but recommendations. And I'm a ZeroYuuki shipper, I like Kaname and all, but not with Yuuki, and the sibling thing just grosses me out…

Anyway, hope you like and hopefully Zero is in character or at least believable. Him and his mood-swings can be difficult.

This is set after the Ball and Shizuka's death, and episode 1 of VK: Guilty, which I had most of this fic complete before I watched the first four episodes of VK: Guilty and anything past that, I haven't seen.

..!..

He should be used to this. Used to Yuuki expressing her affection for Kaname. But now, as he had been passing by—making his rounds as a Guardian to stop pesky Day Class girls from sneaking around. They didn't know the dangers they were in when the Night Class was present.

The silver haired teen was hiding behind a thick tree after he had spotted his best friend in the presence of a familiar vampire clothed in white. Kaname. Zero growled lowly.

"You really are a great girl, Yuuki. Of all the people I have met you are the kindest and gentlest, that's what I like about you," the pureblood said with his sultry voice. One that made mortal and immortal girls swoon just at the sound of it. The hunter's face mirrored a scowl.

"Umm…" he heard the shy voice of his best friend and the shuffling of clothing with her gasp of breath. Silently he peaked behind the tree and his pale violet eyes caught the sight of one of the beings he hated most holding Yuuki in his arms. "Kaname…" she breathed.

"Yuuki…" she gasped again as the brown haired males arms wrapped around her tighter, as if to protect her from the chilly night. His head rested itself in the hair that blocked her neck from him. Zero stiffened, his posture straight and his ever cold and harsh features had betrayed what he felt. His eyes were slightly distant, holding a flash of sadness within their depths.

"Kaname…I…I l—"

"Shh…" the tall brunette stopped her, his face closer. Yuuki sighed and relaxed into his embrace, which didn't go unnoticed by their observer.

Unable to look anymore, he remained hiding behind the tree, his back resting against its bark and head tilted up toward the moon he could see through the leaves overhead. He'd always known Kaname was something special to his best friend, even if he told her that vampires were dangerous, she still believed humans and vampires could live together in peace.

Accepting the fact that he couldn't convince her otherwise, he let her do her own thing, whether he really liked the idea or not. But as he was observing, he couldn't explain what he felt. He had never liked Kaname because of what he was, that and he didn't trust vampires like Yuuki seemed to due to his past. Seeing her…so cozy in his arms…feeling so safe she could relax…he didn't know why it bothered him so much. The first time he had seen them together like this, was when Kaname beat him to the first Level E Yuuki has encountered, only hours before she found out his secret, one only a select few knew about. Even when they were dancing at the Ball, Zero couldn't explain his thoughts.

"Kaname…I…I l—"

Something in his chest tightened, his hands fisted and he glared at the giant orb in the night sky, it seemed to be mocking him. A gentle breeze blew the leaves overhead, rustling lightly. Zero looked at his clenched fists. 'She was going to tell him…tell him she loves him…' it set him off in a bad mood, 'Whatever, just don't hurt her…Kaname…' his footsteps were silent, he had known all along, that the pureblood had been aware of his company.

Zero continued on his way, leaving Yuuki with the man she loved.

..!..

Kaname watched the Kiryuu hunter go without so much as a glance behind him. He'd felt him approach and hid the fact from Yuuki, so her attention wouldn't be distracted.

Once Zero was no longer present Kaname pulled away – Yuuki was left baffled and blushing lightly.

"You mean so much to me Yuuki," he brushed her cheek with one of his hands, which made her turn darker, "so much more than you could ever imagine."

Suddenly he walked passed her, leaving her to wonder.

She was about to tell him. Tell him something very important.

Before she could dwell farther on his actions she heard hurried footsteps, and then two girls from the Day Class dashed through the trees quickly. The female Disciplinary Committee member sighed, 'Time to get to work.' She thought and ran to catch up with them. "Hey!"

Both girls were startled, freezing instantly in their tracks beside the large fountain in the middle of the courtyard.

"You two should be in your dorms. Don't you ever get tired of being told to do so?" Yuuki asked. It always got a little old having girls sneak out at night and tell them the same thing. 'Perhaps the Headmaster should have the dorm doors locked from the outside and windows sealed shut.'

She thought it would be nice to have one night where she and Zero didn't really have to tell Day Class students to get to bed. Her hand was brought to her chin in thought. 'I haven't seen Zero since we started our duties; I wonder where he's hiding now.'

Turning her chocolate brown eyes to the girls, her tone became commanding, "Go back to your dorms, you should get some sleep for class."

Both whined, "It's no fair, you get to stay out and see the Night Class students."

"Sorry but those are the rules."

The girls huffed, "You always have to suck the fun out of everything, Yuuki."

"Maybe we should see if we can become a Disciplinary Committee member," the second girl remarked, and they left in fits of giggles and mentioning some of the Night Class student's names.

Yuuki sighed; she already knew for sure they would never get to become a Disciplinary Committee member because they didn't know the secret about the Night Class.

For her, the rest of the night was quiet, very quiet she wasn't sure what to do. After the two Day Class girls went back to their rooms without complaint, almost without complaint, there had been no more students creeping around.

The sun began to rise and Yuuki realized it was time to get ready for class, she yawned tiredly and headed to the bathroom – where for the first time since last night she had seen Zero.

"Oh, good morning Zero." She said at the door.

He didn't spare her a glance and continued washing his face and reached for the clean towel at his side and dried his face.

Then briefly his lavender orbs flickered over to her before he grabbed his white button up shirt and he walked passed her, their shoulders brushing slightly. But to Yuuki, she could have sworn there was more force in there than to be accidental. It seemed to her that Zero was upset about something. She was used to his cold demeanor at times, but he at least greeted her in the mornings, today he didn't even grunt or look at her as she replied to his presence. Only a glance a few moments later and he acted as if he was hearing things.

'Something must be bugging him,' the teenager thought, 'what could it be?'

She decided she'd see how today when then she'd talk to him.

..!..

Today was going too slow, not that Zero was really paying attention; he kept nodding off in class until he just fell asleep. For a while he had been casting glances at Yuuki, watching her yawn every few minutes and her talk quietly to Yori, her seatmate.

After leaving Yuuki and Kaname alone, he'd just went back to his dorm to try and shut off his mind, but that didn't work as he had hoped it would. It had taken him hours to get to sleep. Every thought went back to the both of them, his best friend with another man and in his arms more times than he cared to remember. He'd had nightmares when he did finally submit to slumber.

He recalled Shizuka's words clearly in his head, about Yuuki causing him pain. She was unintentionally hurting him…with anything Kaname related. Of course she didn't know this, its not like he told her everything that went on in his life, or told her his secret that she stumbled upon. He had honestly thought he would have lost her if he told her about his transformation into a vampire, one that would fall to Level E status.

Zero didn't want her to know that there was a possibility that he felt more for her than a friend. She has Kaname, who she is indebted to. He felt that he would only cause her pain, pain with her keeping him alive from the substance of her blood. For needing her blood he was constantly living in disgust with the being he was changing into. In the deep recesses of his mind he knew he'd hurt her when he became a Level E. His essence would break her.

There is some part of her that knows he cares for her deeply, friendship and a sibling is her only contemplation. The walls he had placed around his heart and mind are always lifted and weakened when she is near, but ready to shield him when she tries to get too close. These barriers are put up to protect both him and her, to protect her from hurting like he knows he'll make her hurt.

He had wondered what it would have been like to not have known Yuuki. He was lonely and wanted to die when his family was taken from him before his eyes. But when he moved in with Kaien Cross, and when he had met her, she shed a small amount of light into the dark pit of loneliness and despair. Her kind and caring self gave him a glimmer of hope when he'd lost everything.

Zero wasn't one to just walk away, but he knew he wanted her to be happy. If she was happy, she could forget about him. Forget the pain that would come when he could no longer control the final moments of his existence and all memories of her and the moments they spent together would be completely lost.

The ending bell rang, signaling the end of class for the day. Aware of the time, the silver haired teen stood up and quickly gathered his things, slipping by Yuuki silently as Yori held her attention.

"How are you going to pass if you can't even stay awake in class? You should have a talk with the Headmaster about it. Your grades are dropping with participation." He heard Yori clearly and a frantic response from Yuuki as he disappeared behind the door. There was a barely upturn of his lips with her reply, one expression that would remain unseen to the world.

The smell of rain was heavy in the air and the sky was blanketed in gray. Thunder rumbled loudly above followed by its faithful companion lightning. Drops of water began to fall from heaven one after the other.

Zero could heard the other students shouting about the rain and he watched most of them hurry to the shelter of an awning to escape the rain as it came down in angry torrents. 'Hopefully this rain will keep students in their rooms tonight.' He wasn't really in the mood the walk around in the rain and get soaking wet while on patrol for wayward delinquents.

Treading forward into the pelting downpour he was a good distance away when he heard his name. "Zero!" he knew who it was, and he figured he couldn't ignore her like he did this morning. He stopped under a tree which provided little protection.

He watched Yuuki charge through the rain, some sort of parchment over her head and as she reached him she shivered. Those chocolate orbs of hers stared into his pale ones, "Are you ready for work?"

The only thing she received was a nod of the head before he left her where she was without so much as a word.

..!..

It was a few hours later when Yuuki found Zero again. He stood with his back resting on one of the stone pillars that was outside the classrooms, staring out into the rain that hadn't eased. To her he looked calm - at peace in his laidback pose. Hands hiding in the pockets of his pants and his school uniform in its usual Zero fashion, head cocked to the side so she could see most of the tattoo on the left side of his neck. For a couple moments she stayed there, watching him and felt she caught a brief expression of something ghost in his eyes before they closed.

His chest rose heavily, taking a deep breath of air, engulfing its purified scent.

Moments like these were ones Yuuki enjoyed, his calm self, where he didn't have to worry. And there were times she could see how handsome he really was. He could have a girlfriend if he'd act a little nicer and seem more approachable.

Smile lighting her face she walked toward him, her boots making her presence known as the silver haired male opened his eyes and glanced in her direction before they darted back to the water that fell from the sky.

She stopped at the pillar across from him and stared out into the darkness of the trees yards away. "No Day Class members sneaking around yet, that's good, hopefully we can get an early night in. I'm tired." She sighed, missing her companion shrug.

Turning fully to him she came up slowly and just stood there, staring at him. When Zero couldn't take it anymore, annoyed scowl on his face he looked at her. "What?"

"Is something wrong?" she asked, her tone telling him she was growing concerned.

"Why would you think that?" he said monotone

"You haven't said anything to me since yesterday before we started with our duties..." she trailed, feeling a little uncomfortable, she looked away. "I thought you may have been mad at me…"

Zero then realized it must have felt like she wasn't worth his time. "Yuuki…" he whispered. "It's not you…it's something else…" which was the truth, but it had to do with her.

He'd been confused and he avoided her trying to keep himself from doing something stupid, or say something.

"Do you want to talk about it?" she inquired softly.

When he didn't answer she took that as a no, so she left it alone and enjoyed his silent company. She was content with him.

Eventually they had to move on to make sure everything was as calm as it seemed. Yuuki had a large umbrella over her and Zero's head as they had to enter the rain and went to the familiar platform where they had a clear view of the Night Class students.

Zero knew all too well who the girl was looking at through the massive glass window. His thoughts darkened; the reason for his mood. At the corner of his eye he could see Kaname look out at the two under the umbrella and a light blush dusted Yuuki's cheeks and her eyes dashed anywhere but to either of the boys.

This was too much.

She didn't realize that everything she did that revolved around Kaname hurt him immensely. Wishing not to do something regrettable toward her, he darted out from under the safety of the umbrella so fast that he had nearly disappeared before Yuuki realized he was gone. "Zero! Zero get back under the umbrella or you'll get sick! Zero!" she trotted after him in hopes to catch up.

His steps were quick and when he finally stopped Yuuki went right up to him, ready to let him have it. "What are you doing you idiot! You could catch a—" her words were cut short when she'd seen his face. He looked angry, as angry as he'd ever show anyone. "Zero? Zero what's wrong?" she placed a hand on his shoulder but he shrugged it off violently.

"Tch, leave me alone," the former human growled, not daring to meet her eyes, ones he'd seen so many times before he would get lost in.

"But—"

"Talk to your precious Kaname," he spat the name out with pure venom.

Yuuki recoiled, the hand Zero shrugged off brought to her chest, she stared at him. So many emotions she felt. 'Why is he angry about Kaname? I know he doesn't like him but why is he acting like this?' she wondered. "Zero…"

"Don't! Don't act like you know everything! I understand its Kaname, always has been, I'm second…" he trailed.

She stared at him, wide-eyed, "What are you…"

No sooner the words left her lips, Zero turned toward her quickly and grasped both of her shoulders tightly and pulled her closer. She caught a glimpse of something in his eyes before his lips had pressed against hers; his eyes closed the instant they met.

Her body had frozen, eyes wide and her mind drew a blank. She couldn't even feel the rain that continued its angry downpour. 'Zero's…kissing me…what's going on…?'

His lips felt so soft against hers, and she was surprised, he'd gripped her harshly but his kiss was gentle as if trying to tell her something. Just as quickly as it came he pulled away, the drenched silver hair of his head hiding his eyes and water streaming down his face. "Don't worry about me…" he replied softly. "I'll get used to this pain…" then he just walked away as if nothing had happened.

Stringy wet hair sticking to her face, the umbrella she had had laid on the muddy ground forgotten the moment he pulled her to him. Her lips tingled and she lifted a hand to them. 'Zero…kissed me…why? My first kiss. I don't understand…'

"I'll get used to this pain…"

'Pain…that's what Shizuka—' her thoughts ceased, she knew Zero was most likely heading to his dorm. Determined now, she ran off after him, she needed answers. And she wanted them now.

..!..

Isolated in his room with a dry pair of pants, Zero continued to dry his hair and torso with the towel in his hands. He couldn't believe he did that. He'd kissed her.

He sighed, he'd probably put their friendship in jeopardy because of his actions. He'd heard that girls cherish their first kiss, or at least most of them do. 'Kaname was probably her preference for her first kiss too.' He growled, throwing the towel down on the floor. That vampire would always be the first man she desired.

The Kiryuu took a deep breath to calm himself and then a knock came from his door. At first he wanted to pretend he wasn't there and wait for whoever it was to go away. But there was another knock, they knew he was here.

Sighing he stood up and walked unhurriedly to answer. He opened it just an inch and to his surprise it was the girl he had just left standing in the rain. "Yuuki…"

She was still in her sodden clothing, "Can I come in?" she asked quietly, her eyes pleading.

When she shivered, he opened the door wider and pulled her in before closing the door after she entered. "You idiot, you should have changed." He went for a clean towel and wrapped it around her shoulders and then went to dig in his closest for a dry t-shirt and shorts. "Go dry off." He pushed her in his bathroom, she felt like this was the Zero she knew.

Once she was in his bathroom Zero went over to his bed and sat upon it heavily. 'Why did she come here?' he figured she wants answers – answers to why he kissed her.

He didn't notice her approach him in his shirt that was too large for her. "Zero…" he lifted his head; he was at about her level when he was sitting on his bed. Her gaze questioning, "What kind of pain do I cause you?"

The Kiryuu hunter turned away, "Forget it," he replied.

"Zero," she grabbed his face in between her hands, "tell me…" she pleaded.

Her hold was firm, keeping him from pulling away and he was forced to stare into her deep brown orbs.

He tried to tear his head from her but only one thought crossed her mind, she brought her lips down to his, making his eyes widen and her arms wrap themselves around his neck and rest on his shoulders and her hands pressed to the back of his head, fingers tangling into his hair.

Her lips roamed over his hungrily and he responded. Both were fighting for dominance, tongues came into play moments later. Unfortunately in order to breath they had to separate, Yuuki placed her forehead to Zero's chin – where his mouth was on the crown of her head.

"Zero, do you feel something for me…is that the pain I cause you?"

"Yuuki," he breathed.

"Please Zero," she shook her head before she looked into his lavender orbs, tears leaking out of hers. "Please tell me. I've never meant to hurt you, tell me so I don't hurt you anymore."

"It's nothing," he laid down on his bed, his back to her. 'You mean everything to me…but you can't see that because of Kaname…' he sighed, "You can see yourself out."

'He's shutting me out again,' she thought sadly. She looked at his back where his shoulders were tense for reasons unknown to her.

Still feeling a little cold from her damp hair Yuuki wanted warmth and what crossed her mind was when she acted instantly.

Zero felt his bed shift, believing she was going to leave him be, but instead two small arms wound around him so he was pressed to her chest and her head relaxed at the back of his neck. He could feel every part of her and the trembling she tried to hide. "I wish you would talk to me…tell me things so I could stop hurting you. I'm sorry, for whatever it is…for whatever I've done…"

The Kiryuu hunter turned around with him still in her embrace and both met the others eyes, Yuuki could see so much gentleness in his depths, but she could see a small amount of pain and happiness within. His strong arms enveloped her closer to him, his body heat chilled her too the bone, but in a good way, she was feeling warmer. He placed his chin on top of her head, and she breathed on his collar bone, to which he shivered. So lowly Yuuki almost missed it, Zero answered, "You mean everything to me, Yuuki…" it was now or never, "…I love you…"

Her eyes widened, it made sense now. But now she was unsure of her feelings for Zero, her best friend…her brother…and Kaname…

Everything about her was confused now; she was stuck between two men, two men who had a huge part in her life…

The gentle beating of the male's heart thudded in her ears, lulling her to sleep. His skin was so warm and his hold was protective. "Zero…I…"

She fell asleep in his arms. Zero shifted his head so he could watch her breathe, she was peaceful and beautiful. For the first time, she was in his arms—not Kaname's. He knew this wouldn't last long, she'd be back with that pureblood as if nothing happened, but now, Zero would cherish the feeling of her pressed against him, in his arms. And not even the storm outside would ruin this moment.

..!..

While I was watching the first four episodes of VK: Guilty, I was ticked off with Yuuki! Zero's so awesome and I want to rip Kaname's throat out.

ZEROYUUKI FOREVER!

Does anyone else think Zero's father is cute? Zero and Ichiru look exactly like him, though I can't say that they got his eyes, since that is unclear.

Anyway, hopefully for my first VK fic it was believable. Sometimes the first story for a new section can be hard, and I have a few other ZeroYuuki fics planned.

And I have a poll on my profile regarding who you like best with Yuuki, please check it out.

Reviews are appreciated, criticism is welcome.