Not Your Girl Anymore

Based on Chapter 54: Potential of the White Lily; Chapter 59: A Big Brother to Boast About!, and Chapter 60: Pet-Pet S.O.S.!.

I wasn't able to find Kai anywhere in the palace, but I found someone else instead.

I skid to a halt, face-to-face with another equally startled member of Glanzreich's noble circle — the one-and-only high steward to the crown prince himself.

'O-Oh, Count… Rosenberg?'

He collects himself far quicker than I do. With his ruby eyes and glossed shoes and a lavender suit that is pressed and ironed and picture-perfect, he reminds me that I've been sprinting around the palace just prior, and that as a result my hair is now a gold riot and my collar is coming undone.

'A pleasure, Lady Beatrix.' He smoothly bows over my hand and kisses it, then takes one step back with a perfect mix of interest and ennui.

I try not to grimace. Geh… Of course he had to remember my name at the drop a hat and be just so… perfect. Are all the 'flawless' genes in the Rosenberg family? Because as a member of the Lothringens, I feel like I'm literally missing an ingredient in the mix.

'H-Hi—' Oh for goodness' sake, get a hold of yourself. 'Likewise. A beautiful morning, isn't it?'

The clock strikes three.

'Indeed it is. What brings you to the palace today, my dear?'

'The palace? Oh, right.' I laugh nervously. 'I came to see Kai, but think I got the date wrong and I think he's actually at military academy… ha ha…'

I'm actually one-hundred percent certain, after having sprinted around the palace like a crazed kitten looking for him, calling his name.

Count Rosenberg raises his eyebrows lightly. 'Prince… Kai?'

'Yeah — I mean, yes. My fianceé.'

A beat later, his expression clears. 'Oh, I see.' He laughs. 'Is that how it is at the moment?'

…What?

I stare at him, as he steps to the balcony railing and leans against it, watching the view below.

'What do you mean?'

Rosenberg looks back at me. 'Pardon?'

'What do you mean — that's how it is at the moment?'

'Well, you know how it is. Royal engagements only last around five minutes, usually.'

'…I've been engaged to Kai for two years.'

His expression doesn't change.

…Why is it that I… feel… stupider with every word that comes out of my mouth?

'Well, that's nice.' He gives me a concerned look. 'And how's that going for you?'

An awkward silence. One I have no idea how to break.

'Okay, stop.' I step to his side, and put my elbows and crossed arms on the railing. 'What is your problem?'

He doesn't even blink. 'Whatever do you mean?' He looks out over the skyline again, and remarks, 'I would have thought you and Kai were the ones with all the problems. Such a run of bad luck. The poor boy can hardly hold conversation, and then all that business at the academy. It makes one shudder to think of it. And I can't imagine the difficulties of maintaining a long-distance relationship — '

'You're wrong!'

I'm spitting sparks like a firecracker — loud, unruly, and childish, but I'm a noble just as much as he is and I have every right to tell the man to shut up. 'Do not talk about him like that.' I sweep a hand out over the staggering drop to the courtyard below and say, ' You don't even know how far he's come! Kai's worked so hard, all to become a worthy candidate for the throne, just like all of the princes have!'

Rosenberg stares at me for a minute. Then he smiles briefly and looks away once more. 'So that's how it is. You're a crafty girl, I'll give you that. But if you were going to take a shot at the crown then you should have picked Prince Bruno. At least he has a vague chance of surpassing Prince Eins.'

Oh… oh my… does he think I'm a… gold digger? 'It's not like that,' I say, feeling completely sick. 'What do you take me for? The match was arranged by our parents — by the king himself. I had no say in whom I was betrothed to or why.'

'You poor girl.'

'Poor? Why do you call me poor?'

'Because the truth is obvious in every word you say. Aren't you just desperately trying to get the prince to see you as more than a childhood friend?'

How does he… I close my eyes. But I can't close my ears.

'Take that paper heart off your sleeve, my girl, before someone comes along and rips it to shreds.'

A long silence passes.

'I could help you, you know,' he muses. 'Given my connections and all. Perhaps — '

But that's enough. '…Can you stop talking, you insufferable brat?'

He stops. And turns to me. And I stare at him and his eyes narrow. 'What... did you just say?'

'You heard it. And I am not your girl. I am not your plaything and I am not an idiot and my marriage to Kai is not a pawn for you to shove about the chessboard.'

With a crack of skin on skin, my hand is above my head. In his grasp. 'I think you should think carefully about what you're saying, little girl.'

And I whip around, locking his arm in a grip that stresses it to the breaking point, the breaking point of the deadliest waltz I've ever danced. 'And I think you should focus your efforts on Prince Eins… Ernst.' His gaze shifts, and I narrow my eyes in return. 'Yes. I remember you at Prince Eins's side all those years ago. Such a loyal childhood friend. Such a way with words, even then. Tell me, Ernst. Has Eins grown up a little? Has he stopped… running away?'

Fire explodes in my wrist as his grip tightens. His breath clouds in the cold air, and it tastes like sugar and gunpowder on my lips. 'Shut your pretty mouth, Beatrix.'

My heart slams into my ribs. 'No. I will not.'

We've come to an impasse. And I've unnerved him.

I tip my head ever so slowly. 'Who's the one with problems, exactly? You? Me? Kai? Or Eins?'

'You little —'

'Careful. Now let me go. Apparently Kai will be back from military academy soon… and who knows what he'll do if he hears me scream.'

He bares his teeth slightly, in a faint smile. 'And what will he do, given that he's sworn never to lay a finger on another person again? How will your useless Prince Charming save you then?'

'He won't. He'll watch while I punch you in the face, because I made no such promise.'

We stare at each other. Carriage wheels roll in on the driveway. And he lets me go.

'We will talk again,' he says in a low voice, one that I should be terrified of. 'And when we do, I hope it will be a day far in the future when you've exhausted all your options and all your engagements have fallen through, and you have no choice but to turn to someone like me for refuge and a place in society. You would liven things up in Schwarz, my dear. And I would make your very existence there pure hell.' There's that smile — the one that gave me nightmares as a little girl. 'I'll need a way to fill in time once Eins has taken the throne,' he says, 'after all.'

Do not give out knees do not do not do not. 'Sounds like you have sweet dreams at night. I pity your future wife, and sadly, she will not and will never be me. And as we're in a sharing mood, my dreams would be of all your plans falling through and you falling through a trapdoor into Weisburg's dungeons… but that's just my idea of a good time.'

'They're not going to believe you over me.'

'But nor will they believe you over me,' I murmur. 'They will look at this scene and be unable to see how this fragile, stupid girl could have broken your nose out of anything but self-defence and a misplaced flailing hand.' I crack my knuckles lightly. 'Yes, I played that card. Neither of us win today, Ernst. Not you, and not me. Get over it and run along back to Schwarz.'

'You're right about one thing only, my dear. You will never win.'

'Maybe so. Maybe we won't win.' I glare at him. Spitting words in his face that I didn't even realise I knew how to say. 'But if I believed you, then Kai is a throwaway prince and I'm a bundle of insecurity issues. And that's not all I am. What I am, what we are. So get out of my head and get off my fiancee's balcony before I push you off it.'

He raises his eyebrows. 'Well. Sweet dreams, then, Lady Beatrix.'

'Oh, I will, Count Rosenberg. Because I have the good grace not to let my dreams become everyone else's nightmares.'

A faint glimmer of distaste, a courteous bow, and he leaves with a swift turn on his heel and his cane under one arm.

None too soon, because my knees finally give out and I crumple into a sitting position. 'P-Phew.'

I tip my head back and look at the sky.

I'd forgotten what a disaster those playdates at Weisburg could be, on the rare occasion that he and Eins deigned to show up.

I laugh wearily. He hasn't changed.

And that girl who sparred with the princes and rode horseback and got into spats with all manner of nobles and royals and got her cousin's best friend to teach her how to fight hand-to-hand for kicks?

Neither has she.

The End

A/N: Reviews welcome, and thanks for reading!