"Wakey, wakey….Squishy!"
My mind pounded as did a long ringing in my ears as I said groggily, "Wha…?"
"Sir, do keep it down. He is still recovering from the Transfiguration Process.".
"Transfig-wha?" I mumbled as I slowly opened my blurry eyes.
Everything was blurry and a little bright as my eyes opened and closed, trying to get used to the light and to see the two people in front of me.
"QUIET LAWRENCE!" The tall one yelled which only made the ringing worse.
"Of course sir and might I congratulate you on getting a Lombax." The plump one said as my eyes fully opened.
[?!: Greetings, you may know this handsome voice of mine or you might not! If you don't...then where have you been, haven't you read my vid-comics, played my holo-games, or seen my holo-movies!?
?:Ehem…!
?!: Oh right…..the script, stupid prison guards…...anyway…..greetings cadets, my name is Captain Copernicus Qwark and I'm just here to be your guide, your mystical guru, your great and powerful Sensi! Your-
?: Can we hurry this up, ah I still want lunch!
?!: Quiet, solitary Bill! Anyway….anytime you see a paragraph that is italics, it is either a flashback or third person view! Generally it will be third person, but it is good to know that Flashbacks will have the word Flashback before them, that's all cadets! Now let this picture of a rubber ducky sooth you into your gameplay of gamei...ness…]
"Isn't it beautiful, Lawrence!?" The tall and blue colored robot said with a laugh as he rubbed his metal palms together.
"Beautiful?! Who ya callin- yeih!" The feline-humanoid creature yelped as it was suspended in mid air by some sort of anti-gravity machine.
The with feline, humanoid alien known as a lombax, with yellow fur, two large pointy ears, brown stripes, large hands, fla and triangular clawed feet, and large green eyes turned in mid air in a type of summer salt as he looked around confused. The creature currently wore nothing but a simple pair of greenish overalls with bracers keeping them up and on him, they also were very and comically oversized. Meanwhile the two robots looked on in amusement, particularly the tall one.
"So sad….tchtchtch…..so sad to see the once great Ratchet floating around like the Squishy he is! Not so smart now, are you!?" The tall one asked, tapping the glass dome which was held in place by a containment field.
The creature hissed in pain as it covered its ears, still floating in the air. "Hey, man! Watch it! Oww! That hurts my ears! Who the heck even is this Ratchet guy!?"
"Why he's you. Do you not remember, Squishy?" The tall robot asked, chuckling evilly.
"No, why? Am I supposed to or…." The poor creature was immediately shut by evil laughter from the tall one.
"Oh this is all too perfect! I bet you don't even know how to look! LAWRENCE!" The tall one yelled which hurt my ears to which the plump robot said, "Right here, Sir."
"Prepare the eye socket diagnostic test!" The tall robot yelled.
"Right away, sir." The plump one said as a creepy eye thing popped up from the floor.
"Don't be afraid now, Dr. Nefarious only wishes to test your sight."
"If you have any!" The tall robot, now known as Dr. Nefarious, laughed which caused me to cringe.
"Yes, of course sir. Now do you remember how to look around?" The plump one asked, holding a small pad of sorts.
"I think?" I said unsure with a raised brow.
"Then this shouldn't be too hard, to look around use the right joystick and to zoom in on your intended target or to just look around hold the L2 button. Try looking down." He said and I did, reluctantly after having looked around a bit.
Wherever I was, it was certainly big….and metally…..
The eye glowed green and went down into the floor, "Good, now try looking up."
I did so which caused that eye to glow green as well, "Very well done, almost as good as the buckets of bolts I'm accustomed to be around…..now how about looking left and then right?"
Two eyes popped up left and right, I looked at them one at a time which then caused them to go away. "Very good, Ratchet. Now, did anything feel off?"
X Yes O No
If you pressed X button,
"Yeah, feels fine to me." I said, still floating in the air
"Very well, but if you change your mind. Due check out the options on your pause screen." The plump robot said whilst Dr. Nefarious grumbled something that sounded like, "Stupid Squishy…."
If you pressed the O button,
"Well….no, it actually feels like I got a crick in my neck…." I said, a little embarrassed.
"YES! TAKE THAT YOU STUPID SQUISHY!" Dr. Nefarious said, laughing away.
"Oh dear, we can't have that. Now can we….I shall change your camera to inverted, but if you wish to change back. Please check the options menu." The plump robot said as the crick in my neck dissipated.
(Author's note; In this scenario, I picked yes.)
[Greetings cadets, remember that you can change your camera and reach the options menu by pressing the pause button!]
The plump robot, known as Lawrence, typed some more on his pad-like device before saying, "Everything seems good sir, happy trails for his eye sockets."
"Good….now to begin the experiments! After lunch, come Lawrence! I'm craving a Galatos Galaxy Deluxe pizza…" Nefarious said, hands behind his back as he walked away into the darkness.
"Of course, sir. I shall place an order, right away." Lawrence said, following close behind which left me alone in the darkness.
"Hello! Hey! Can someone get me down from here!?" The Lombax yelled from his stationary position as it played around in the state it was in, surprisingly zero gravity was fun believe it or not and very dizzy…
He gagged and swallowed his lunch as he was poised in mid air, did he even have lunch? "Ugh….what did I even eat, bleh! The taste is on my mouth! Get it off!"
It's tongue was sticking out like a dog as he tried, in vain, to scratch off the awful taste before it heard giggling.
He then immediately stopped and said bravely, yet fearfully, "Ok, whoever is there! Stay back or I'll…..well I can't do anything…...but I can still make faces! So help me, I will fight anything with my face! Even…"
Then some weird giggling kid came out from the darkness and stood before the lombax, "...a kid…?"
The kid continued to laugh and giggle as he said, "Your funny mister Lombax! Your such a silly kitty!"
"Kitty, Lombax?" He asked absolutely confused.
"Yeah, your very silly mister!"
"Uhh….sure….hey wait a sec, what are you doing in here kid?" he asked, his ears perking up in immense confusion.
Could his ears even perk up and why do they feel so big, are ears even like that?
The kid stopped laughing, "I was taken from my home, I can't find my mommy or Daddy….."
"Ok….that took a 180 real quick…..sorry to hear that, kid…." He said, ears dropping slightly.
Wait….can ears droop or are they not supposed to do that?
"I just wanna go home…..can you help me, mister?"
Whether it was blood rushing to my head, kindness, or plain out stupidity. He will never know. Actually, he's pretty sure that it was the blood rushing to his head from being upside down so much…..
"Sure, kid. Just gotta get me down first…." he said, looking up at the ceiling because it didn't want to break my neck from trying to look at the kid.
"Ok, kitty!"
"Remember kid, use the right joystick to move around! At least I think it's the right one….."
The fongoid quickly got to work and moved around a little, getting used to the area.
"Kid, I know you love moving and all. But I can't exactly help you by just hanging around!"
"Whoops sorry, mister!"
The little fongoid then ran around and behind the field to some crates and smashed them, getting a large amount of bolts, finding a very big golden bolt, and the release button.
"What was that?"
"Nothing!" The Fongoid said quickly as he got 1,203 bolts.
He then grabbed the golt bolt and held it above his head, "Look mister, a gold bolt! These things can be used to get so many cool costumes! Can I keep it, please!"
"Uhh, yeah….sure, kid."
"Awesome! Thanks mister!" The fongoid said before the gold bolt went away.
"Alright, mister! Here ya go!"
"Deactiving zero graventational force generator." The computer voice said as the fongoid ran to the front of the containment chamber to await the Lombax.
The field shut off which left the Lombax floating in mid air for a few seconds, he looked around for a few seconds before looking at the screen. "Uh-oh….yow!"
He yelped as he landed on the floor, flat on his face. His tail puffing up along with the cream colored tail tuff before the tail fell down with the Lombax.
"Ow…." He groaned in a pained voice as the fongoid asked, "Are you alright, mister?"
"Yeah, jus' gimme a sec kid….." He said, getting up with a grunt.
"So, what is this place anyhow?"
"This is Dr. Nefarious's space station, it's where me and my family were taken after we were taken from our home world in Gimlick Valley." The kid said with clear sadness as I looked around the room before returning my gaze back to the kid, "Gim-what?"
"Warning! Polar ionized Chamber Station Deactivated, now sending repair bots." A computer voice said.
"Hey, kid. You got a weapon or something I can use?" I asked nervously, hoping he had a gun, bomb, or…..
"No, but I have this weird wrench!" The kid said, wrench…
I groaned, "Alright, it'll do."
[Hey, look at that! You have an Omni-Wrench! Good job cadet! Remember you can upgrade your wrench by collecting Platinum bolts, good luck!]
Then five robots came in, "Alert! Lombax has escaped! Annihilate!"
"Great, so I have to use a wrench against five robots….." I groaned before dodging quickly as they began firing, though I don't know how I dodged in the first place!
I then swang my wrench wildly, swinging it madly from here to there and back and then. One by one, each robot was knocked down. Each of them exploding and releasing….bolts?
[Remember cadets! Bolts can be used to but things, like a nice combustor or a Negotiatior. Even a hygienator!]
"Gee whizz, mister! That was amazing! Where did you learn that!?"
"No idea kid but I'm glad I know it!"
More robots came in soon as I said that, "Annihilate! Annihilate!"
"Great, more robots….." I said exasperated before getting back to work with swinging my wrench.
After a few more swings, the robots were gone. Leaving behind piles of bolts.
"Gee, mister! That was amazing!" He said, cheering.
Meanwhile I thought differently as I breathed heavily and said, "Yeah….sure….kid….oh boy….."
"Are you ok, mister?" He asked as I quickly opened the door and began jogging off, him following me closely
"Yeah, kid….jus'...oh boy….just taking a breath…..or two…..ok, maybe a lot…..oh boy….." I said, panting heavily as I jogged down the long halls
"Are you going to be ok, mister?" The kid asked as I stopped temporarily due to some small robots which I promptly destroyed with my wrench.
"Yeah, kid. Don't worry I'll be fine….now...now come on, let's go and rescue your parents….wherever they are….." I said, breathing heavier from the short fight.
"Yay!" The kid said as the Lombax continued its trek before arriving in a large room where hundreds of robots were at first talking with each other before looking in the direction of the opening door.
"And then I sai-Greg, are you even listening? Lombax detected! Prepare for annihilation!" The robot said, changing its tune after a few short beeps from it.
"Oh boy….." The Lombax said with a very pale yellow furred face.
"Annihilate! Annihilate!"
I gulped nervously before getting back to work, using my wrench. I destroyed each robot successfully, tearing up my overalls slightly, but hey still alive! At least I was successful up until a enormous robot came in….
"ANNIHILATE!"
"Geih!" I yelped, jumping behind a small barrier which was a cafeteria table just in time before it began firing its guns.
"Well, sh-er I mean crap!" I said, stopping myself before I said something bad infront of the kid.
"Could really use a gun right now…" I said as the table cracked, that's when I spotted a strange gun nearby.
I looked at the bullets overhead and then back at the gun on the floor.
/ Right Joystick
Then as fast as a fox, or possibly a thieving raccoon, I bolted out of my cover…..
— Left Joystick
….and slid along the tiled floor,
L2 Slide
grabbing the gun,
] Wrench
and jumping over to nearby cover just as the guns started up once more,
X Jump
put my gun over the cover and fired.
/ Right Joystick
Shooting the robot right in its dome-like head, destroying it and making thousands of bolts fly out of it.
R1 Fire Gun
[Greetings cadet! I would personally like to congratulate you on getting your first gun, a combuster! Weapons can be upgraded as you use them, now go have fun you trigger happy Lombax!]
The lombax then slowly moved his head upwards, his large ears poking out. His large ears twitching about, listening to every little thing in the room.
"Uh, mister. You do know that the big robot is gone right?" The fongoid asked with a tilted head infront of the barrier.
The lombax quickly poked the rest of himself out, his right arm leaning against the barrier, "Of….course I knew that! I'm a Lambos, remember?"
"Isn't it 'Lombax' though, mister?" The fongoid asked curiously with a tilted head which the lombax replied whilst trying to look like he already knew that, "Uh...yup! That's what I meant kid, Lombax!"
"So, uh...where are the holding cells, exactly?"
"They're right through that door, come on mister!" The kid said and ran to the door which opened on it's own to reveal a few cells full of aliens like the kid, some adults and some kids.
I walked in with him, mystified by the very sight, I was soon taken out of my short sight seeing when one of the alien's said. "Look, a Lombax! We're saved!"
"A Lombax?"
"Yes, look! Nurf!"
"But I thought there were only two left!"
"So did I! Nirk!"
"Are you here to help us?" Asked one of them.
"Yup, kid roped me into saving you guys. So….any idea on how to get these cells open?" I asked, swinging my arms back and forth in a motion as I looked at each of them for help.
"Oh! I do!" Said one all the way in the back
"Oh no…."
"Not him…."
"I thought he was left behind with the chief…."
I looked at them curious as to why they were acting like this, then a alien wearing what looked to be a type of futuristic clothing and a lab coat as well as some glasses walked through the large group of aliens in one cell.
"Oh here we go…." Whispered one to another.
"All you have to do is cut the wire from the main rotator cuff, that should turn off the metric system. Turning off the laser grid along with the basic cell security system." He said, pushing the glasses on his face up a little.
"Listen to him, not a single 'Nirk'!"
"I know, can you believe it?!"
Ignoring the other aliens multiple comments of the one helpful one, I then went over and pulled off the small hatch of the control console.
"You do know what your doing, right mister?" The kid asked.
"I think? Hey, lab coat guy, mind telling me what I'm supposed to do here?" I asked, looking at all the criss-crossed wires.
"Of course! Here's how you do it, use the right joystick to remove the cufflink from the wires and use the left to switch the wires to unlock the cells. Be careful to only switch the wires when the electrical current is away. If you get shocked then you'll have to start over!" He warned/explained.
"Ok got it, let's see here…." He said.
[Greetings, cadets! Just a reminder that you can always get a retry when hacking a control panel! But keep in mind that you only have a limited amount of retries before the alarm kicks in!]
"Right….let's see here….Right joystick to remove cufflink…" I mumbled as the cufflink was slowly removed.
"Then left joystick to move wires…." I mumbled to myself, luckily there were only four wires.
I moved each wire to their proper place which was the opposite one, red wire into blue slot, blue wire into red slot, orange wire into yellow slot, and yellow wire into orange slot. Each time being careful of the electrical current that slowly traveled upwards through the wires, soon there was a little beep and the light up in the corner turned from a bright red to a soft illuminating green.
I then breathed a sigh of relief as I got up from the control panel, the main side panel that once covered it up still to the side revealing the criss-crossed wires.
Fail Dialogues
Fail #1, "YEOUCH! Whoops!"
Fail #2, "OW! Uh….meant to do that!"
Fail #3, "Oof...Oh boy…."
Fail #4, "YEIH! Uh oh….." I said with immense fear as the alarm sounded and two robots came in, "Annihilate! Annihilate!"
GAME OVER SCREEN appears after Fail #4's cutscene has finished.
Note; These fails count for the entire game but each have different enemies coming in.
The cells unlocked as many of the fongoids cheered until the Lombax shushed them, "Shhh! Are you trying to get us all caught?!"
"Oh…"
"Oh, yeah…"
"Hehehehe, sorry….nirk!"
"Yeah….nirk!"
"Jr? Zahn Jr?!" Asked a female fongoid.
"Mom, Dad!" The fongoid kid yelled as he jumped into the female's waiting arms before she hugged him along with a nearby male fongoid.
"Oh, Zahn! We were so worried about you!" The male said as he hugged him.
The female fongoid then looked up at the Lombax with tear filled eyes and said, "Thank you, we were so worried for him….thank you for saving our son!"
"Ummm...anytime, ma'm." The Lombax said a bit awkwardly as a fongoid said, "Do you know how to get us back home?"
The lombax paled a little at this but kept his composure as he said, "Yeah, come on. Let's go!"
Taking out his combustor, the lombax walked over to the door. Ready to take the alien group back home! Whenever he come across something that'll be able to do it of course…..
"Uh, mister? You do know the docking bay is that way, right?" The kid, now known as Zahn, asked curiously whilst pointing the other way.
"Oh...uh, yup! Thanks for reminding me, kid! Now come on, let's get outta here." The lombax said, running through the door.
Many of the fongoids looked at eachother confused before shrugging and then following the Lombax.
I would have continued running but I came face to face with a bunch of crates, "Great, crates…."
I then quickly smashed them down with my wrench, collecting a bunch of bolts as I came into the main docking bay which was filled with robots.
"Oh no! The ship is guarded! We're doomed, nirk!"
"Doomed!"
"Not quite, Lombax if you man that turret and keep the robots busy long enough then there's a chance that I might be able to get everyone aboard and prepare the ship. When I give you the signal, I'm going to need you to head over that winch crank to open the bay doors for the ship." The fongoid with the glasses said to which I nodded at and quickly got on it as he continued, "To move the turret, use the left joystick and to fire use the R1 button. To launch rockets, hold the L1 button and then let go to fire. Remember to wit until the rocket or rockets have locked on because you have a limited amount."
"Ok, got it. See you guys on the flipside." I said as the robots began piling in.
Dialogue for turret minigame.
"Hey, your doing great!"
"Oh no, watch out the ships are coming!"
"Great job! Keep it up!"
"Almost done over here, just have to reboot the system…"
"Ok, open up the bay doors! Hurry before they send reinforcements!" The alien with the labcoat said through a speaker.
"On it!" I said and dashed over to the winch crank.
"Press the button when you get near a winch crank or a bolt crank. For this crank, you'll need to move the left joystick in a circle in order to use it. For the bolt crank, just hold the left joystick in whatever direction you want to move the crank and it'll do so." The alien continued I started to open up the bay doors with the winch.
Slowly the bay doors opened up in the background as I used the winch.
"Great job! Almost there!" He said over the speaker.
Finally the door was fully opened as a female voice said, "Bay doors opened, launching ship transport vessel #17739405."
"Thanks again, Lombax! Our kind is in your debt!" The alien said one last time as the ship was dispatched.
"Grrrmmm…..WHO OPENED THE BAY DOOR AND RELEASED MY PRISONERS, LAWRENCE!" Said the voice of Dr. Nefarious, very angrily over the intercom.
"Uh oh…." I said with a nervous gulp.
"Finding out now sir, ah it appears that Ratchet has escaped. Oh, goody it seems he's also the one that rescued your captives as well." Lawrence said as I bolted for the nearby door and down the halls, destroying robots and crates along the way.
"WHAT?! RRRRRRRAAAAATTTTTTTTTCCCCHHHHEEEEEE- Oh Lance, please never leave me! Even if your a hypersonic cyberwolf that is bent on killing all life!"
The Lombax had no idea what happened but somehow, the intercom switched to some sorta space opera….though he had the strangest feeling that it was Nefarious….
Either way, the yellow furred and brown striped Lombax gazed upwards at the ceiling where a speaker for the intercom was, very confused as it continued. "Oh Janice! Never! Kiss me Janice! Kiss me, kiss me until the metal consumes me! Woof, woof! Woof, woof, Janice! Woof, woof all the way to my Cyberwolf side!"
"Oh Lance! Kiss me, lick my lips with your wolf tongue!"
"I will, Janice! Oh, I will! Be mine, Janice! Be my alph-"
Then it stopped as the sound of someone slapping metal was heard over the intercom and then the Lombax quickly covered his ears in pain as a sudden yell shook the ship, "-EEEEEEETTTTTTTTT! LAWRENCE! SEND IN, VICTOR!"
"Oh goody, I get to pull a lever. Right away, sir." Lawrence said, changing his tune at the end for an unknown reason that eluded me but then I quickly stopped thinking about that and instead focused on what Nefarious had said.
Then the ship shook as the Lombax looked round and round confused whilst trying to keep his balance, "Hey-WOAH! WHAT'S GOING ON!?"
Then that's when he saw it…...a large, red robot with a broad upper body, and a protruding jaw. Needless to say, the robot was very...no, scratch that...extremely terrifying…
"Ah, I see you've found Victor. Victor….ANNIHILATE HIM!" Dr. Nefarious yelled through the intercom.
"You got it, boss!" The robot said as it cracked his robotic neck with both his hands in both directions as he growled before reaching behind his back and pulling out a negotiator, the Lombax meanwhile slowly but surely attempted to back away slowly.
The lombax continued to back away with a very scared look, "Oh boy….hey there, big..scary...robot...thing...we can talk this out, righ-YEIH!"
The lombax yelped as he jumped out of the way, just in time to avoid a rocket hitting him, he then said with a gulp whilst pointing at the robot very scared. "That's a no….."
"I'm gonna to rip you in half and then use your spine as a jump rope!" The robot yelled whilst pointing at me, it was then that I quickly turned around and made a run for it just as a rocket hit the metallic floor.
"Get back here!" The large robot yelled as I ran for the hills...er, halls in this case.
"NO! He's getting away! LAWRENCE, DO SOMETHING!" Nefarious yelled over the intercom as I ran and ran.
"Of course, sir. Sending in the Hydrolic disruptors." Lawrence said as a bunch of water filled robots zoomed out of the nearby vents.
"Uh, oh!" I yelped and quickly smashed them up with my wrench which caused water to explode all over the floor.
Then to my surprise, the robot stopped infornt of the water as it still spilled out, giving me an edge as I ran.
"So, sorry sir. I completely forgot that Mr. Ion has tremendous troubles with water…."
"LAWRENCE!" Nefarious yelled as I arrived in a long hall with what I assumed were escape pods, lining the left side of the wall.
The lombax quickly typed in what came first into mind which was 'ANNIHILATE!', the doors then opened as he prepared to get in just as Victor returned and he didn't look too happy at all.
"Uh-oh!" The lombax said, eyes shrinking to pinpricks.
"LOMBAX!" Victor yelled as the lombax launched himself into the escape pod and just launched it, not caring where he landed as it quickly launched, sending him off to his unknown destination.