Fade to Black
It was over. She knew it. And there was nothing she could do to change it.
There would never be another man who would love her. Not the way he did. She knew she would never be able to let someone in again. Not knowing that she would inevitably screw it up.
The fact that he was gone was her own fault.
And now she was alone.
Well, not entirely alone, the voice in her head said in a tone dripping with what could only be described as sarcasm. She rolled her eyes at fate's cruel trick as she looked down at the stupid gray plastic stick she gripped in her shaking hands. Nope, you're never going to be alone again. This kid will make sure of that.
It was the not knowing ... the uncertainty that haunted her. The fact that one day this child would want to know about his or her father. What would she tell that little person? Not sure, kid. He's either the spawn of Satan or the most amazing human being I've ever known.
She shook her head as she sat on the edge of her bed and stared out into the spring storm that raged outside. She'd never been a fan of bad weather, but right at that moment, the claps of thunder and bolts of lightning seemed oddly appropriate. What kind of mother are you going to be? the voice boomed in her head in time with the noise outside. You sure as hell don't have a good role model to learn from. You're just going to screw this up too. She felt the tears on her face move in time with the rain on the window.
Laying down and curling into a ball, the tears fell in a torrent until exhaustion took over and she cried herself to sleep.
The next noise she heard slowly drew her back into consciousness. It was like a hammering ... pounding. Someone was pounding on her front door. But before she could rouse herself enough to move, the pounding stopped. Good, she thought assuming who ever it was had given up. But then the sound of a key turning in the lock got her attention. Her eyes opened wide, knowing she didn't want to see anyone. Not Glenn, not Bo, not Emily.
She was moving to sit up when a voice rang out. "Juliette!"
She froze.
He was the last person she thought would be there.
She slowly turned around and their eyes met through the threshold of her bedroom. For what seems like hours, they just watched each other. He was soaking wet, drops of rainwater cascading down his face and off his fingertips. She was suddenly self conscious, standing there in nothing but a tshirt that she knew he would recognize as one she had stolen from his closet. She waited, no words able to come to her mind. Finally he broke down the wall of silence.
"It doesn't matter."
"Avery ..."
"It doesn't matter. None of it does. Because I love you so much that knowing what happened ... what you did with him ... can't make me stop. Even the fact that you kept it from me can't make me stop loving you. I don't really understand it. I should be furious with you, but I can't be. I know that it's partially my fault. That I drove you to it. I didn't take the time to listen to you and for that I will never forgive myself. But I think we can move past it. I want to move past it because the thought of a future filled with nights of going to sleep without you next to me ... of making music without hearing your voice ... it hurts too much to even think about. I want to make it work. I want you."
He hadn't gotten past the first sentence before tears once again streamed down her face. By the time he finished she was sobbing. Those were words she longed to hear, but knew he might not be so quick to repeat them when he knew. She was positive it would once again send him running for the hills, but she couldn't stop the words from spilling out of her mouth as she wept.
"I'm pregnant."
This time it was him who stood frozen in place. Unmoving, but not void of emotion. A thousand different ones appeared on his face as he took in her words.
*** Fade to Black ***
Possibly to be continued ...