Disclaimer: I own nothing, and only borrowed the characters for a little while.
"So how is your dear wife?" asked Mrs Fricker of Pastor Parker, the ever present plate of brownies in hand.
"Back off bitch."
Dan raised his eyebrow as said wife arrived on the scene and the widow departed, her jaw dropped.
"This wife is hormonal, a beached whale and entitled to her own opinion."
He pressed a careful kiss to her forehead.
"Yes dear."
Finito.