Bounceless Bungee Cords
It started with an innocent question at breakfast.
"Ever wonder what it would be like to fly without a broom?" George spread butter across his toast and jerked his head toward the enchanted ceiling of the Great Hall.
Fred glanced up. The sky was crystal-clear, without a cloud in sight—exactly the kind of day for a brisk chase around the Quidditch pitch, if their brooms hadn't been confiscated by Umbridge the week before. He heaved a sigh. "Daily."
"Must be some way to make it work."
Fred ran through a mental checklist of the joke products they had stored under their beds up in the Gryffindor dormitory. None of them had anything to do with flight.
"What about a really massive Wingardium Leviosa?" Lee Jordan used his fork to mime a swish-and-flick motion, flinging bits of scrambled egg across the table. "If Fred and I stand on the ground and cast it together, it should be strong enough to lift you."
George shook his head. "It wouldn't the same."
Lee shrugged. "Just trying to help the weak and downtrodden in your time of need."
Fred smirked and slapped Lee on the back. "Thanks, mate. Truly chivalrous of you. Godric Gryffindor would be proud."
"And thanks for implying it would take two of you to lift me." George looked down at his stomach and patted it fondly. "If I'm getting chubby, all you had to do was say so."
"It's not your fault." Fred glanced up at the ceiling again. "Without Quidditch, how can we be expected to stay trim?"
The three fell into silence as they looked into the sky, each pondering how to fly without a broomstick.
Finally, Lee snapped his fingers. "I've got it!"
A few hours later, the three seventh-years stood at the top of the Astronomy Tower, shivering slightly in the November air. Slowly, they peered over the ledge at the ground below.
Lee let out a low whistle. "Long way down."
Fred turned away and reached into his rucksack. "Who's going to test them out?" he asked, pulling out a long tangle of flesh-colored cords.
It had been genius, really. At Lee's suggestion, they had taken their supply of Extendable Ears and charmed them to stretch and bounce, like giant rubber bands. Whoever was going to be flying would tie one end of the Ears around himself and attach the other end to something tall; then, all he had to do was jump down and wait for the Ears to snap him back up into the air like a bungee cord.
They'd practiced a bit inside the castle—Fred had attached the Ears to his canopy tester and jumped off his bed, and then George had taken a leap from the landing of the boys staircase down into the common room—and when both had walked away unscathed, they had deemed the invention worthy of a larger test.
"So?" Fred waved the Extendable Ears tantalizingly. "Who's it going to be?"
Lee and George looked at each other expectantly.
"Lee," said George with a definitive nod.
Lee raised his eyebrows. "Come off it."
"Come off what? You're the only one who hasn't tested it out yet."
"I'm not jumping off the bloody Astronomy Tower."
"Why not?" asked Fred. "It was your idea to begin with."
Lee folded his arms. "My idea to begin with was casting Wingardium Leviosa."
"Come on, mate. Where's your sense of adventure?"
"Losing out to my sense of self-preservation."
"Oh, my mistake. I thought you were a Gryffindor."
"Funny." Lee rolled his eyes. "Anyway, George should really be the one, shouldn't he? He's the one who wanted to fly without a broom in the first place."
George snorted. "Oh, really brave, Lee. Guess chivalry is dead."
"Look, all I'm saying is, if this doesn't work—"
Identical dramatic gasps cut him off.
"Doesn't work?"
"Who does he think he's dealing with, George?"
"When have we ever invented something that doesn't work?"
"The Boxing Telescopes," Lee supplied, counting them off on his fingers. "The Puking Pastilles. The first seven versions of the Ten-Second Pimple Vanisher. The Screaming Yo-Yos—"
"What do you mean, the Screaming Yo-Yos don't work?"
"They work perfectly!"
"We wanted them to lose their voices."
"And even if we didn't, all you have to do is pop in a lozenge and they're good as new again."
"Still!" Lee waved at the edge of the Astronomy Tower. "I'm not risking my neck on a product you've only tested twice."
"Fine." Fred gripped the Extendable Ears with newfound conviction. "I'll do it."
George clapped his hands together once. "Excellent! Let's get you strapped in."
"Aren't you nervous at all?" Lee asked as George busied himself wrapping the cords around Fred's waist and torso.
Fred shrugged. "I reserve actual terror for only the most special of occasions."
George gave his handwork a sharp tug. The Ears didn't budge. Taking the end of the cord that wasn't wound around his brother, he fixed it to the stone with a quick Sticking Charm. "It's ready."
Fred looked down at himself and took a deep breath. "Here I go." He stepped up onto the ledge of the Astronomy Tower. "Eyes open or closed, d'you reckon?"
"Open." George nodded firmly. "Definitely open."
"Okay." Fred rubbed his hands together. "Here goes nothing!"
With a loud whoop and a running leap, he launched himself off the side of the Astronomy Tower.
The wind whipped around Fred's ears so fast that he really could imagine he was flying, if it weren't for the startling lack of stability. Without a broom to rely on, he had no way to control the free-fall; concern crept into his veins as he realized he wouldn't be able to stop himself from hitting the ground at full force if the Ears failed.
The earth spun toward him.
He squeezed his eyes shut.
Then, with a strong jerk on his midsection, the Extendable Ears reached their point of greatest extension, and Fred was bouncing back up in the other direction.
With a startled shriek, he watched the ground hurtle away from him. Now this was more like it! Not exactly flying, but at least he wasn't falling toward the ground anymore. Higher and higher he rose, limbs flapping about wildly, mouth stretched into the widest grin of his life. The wind carried a scream of exhilarated laughter off his lips as he reached the apex of his climb, and then he was falling again, a delicious swoop somersaulting through his stomach.
Before long, the Ears had relaxed enough for Fred to stop swinging. "Oy!" he called up to the Astronomy Tower. He could see Lee and George's heads peering over the edge, cheering and clapping for him. "Pull me up!"
George tapped the Ears with his wand. With a groan, the elastic shrank and retracted into itself, pulling Fred up in a slow ascent.
"What was it like?" Lee asked as George helped Fred scramble back over the ledge.
"Amazing." Fred let out a slow breath. "Really, really something."
"Better than flying?"
"Maybe. Definitely different."
"I want to try." Lee reached for the fleshy cords around Fred's waist, but Fred slapped his hand away.
"George goes next."
"What do you mean, George goes next? I haven't even gotten to test them out yet."
"Yeah, because you didn't believe in our invention." Fred unwound the Ears and passed them to George. "George is the one who's been wanting to fly, so George gets to go next."
"No, it's all right." George passed the Ears on to Lee. "He can try, since he's so eager."
"Thanks, mate." Lee grinned and started to thread the Ears around himself.
"You know what would be wicked?" George poked at the cords. "If you could hide this."
"Hide it?"
"Yeah, you know. Make it invisible somehow. So it looks like you're bouncing all on your own, without any help from the bungee part."
"Brilliant." Fred's eyes lit up. "Couldn't be hard. What invisibility spells do we know?"
"A Disillusionment Charm would do the trick," said Lee.
Fred drew his wand and tapped the Ears. They shimmered and took on the exact color and texture of Lee's robes.
"Okay, Lee." George gestured to the ledge. "Are you ready?"
With a grin, Lee nodded and stepped up to the edge. "Take this, Umbridge, you old toad!"
He spread his arms and leaped.
Fred and George waited a moment, and then raced to the ledge to watch him bounce back up.
But something was wrong—instead of flying back up, as Fred had, Lee was dangling near the ground, apparently of his own accord, limbs flailing helplessly.
"Help!" Lee cried. "It's not working!"
"What's gone wrong?" George asked.
"I dunno." Fred frowned. "The bounce has gone from his bungee."
"Fred! George!"
"I wonder if hiding the Ears made them stop working?"
"Could be," said George. "I've heard of the Disillusionment Charm interrupting other magic—you can hide something so well that the preexisting spells can't find their target anymore, so they wear right off."
"OY! PULL ME UP!"
Fred felt around for the Ears and tapped them with his wand. Nothing happened.
"Uh-oh." Fred leaned over the side and cupped his hands around his mouth. "Hang tight, Lee! It looks like you've broken the Ears!"
"Me?" Lee shouted. "I didn't do anything! Like I told you, your inventions just don't work!"
"Hey!" Fred's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "That's not true! It worked perfectly until you went and hid it!"
"How can you possibly blame me for a spell that you cast?"
"Because the Disillusionment Charm was your idea!"
"My idea was Wingardium Leviosa, and it would never have gotten us into a mess like this!"
"Well, my invention wasn't messy until you went and—"
Fred broke off at the sound of George laughing hysterically.
"What's so funny?"
"All of it." George gestured over the edge, where a group of students had gathered to point and gawk at a flailing Lee. "Fred, you have to admit, even if it didn't help anyone fly without a broom, this is a brilliant prank to add to our collection."
Fred grinned. "Bounceless Bungee Cords—trick your friends into taking the leap, then leave them there dangling."
"Or stage a fight with a friend and make a third friend watch as you both go over the edge to your apparent deaths!"
"Yes!" Fred's eyes were bright. "Or—"
"Oy!" called Lee. "You two can show off to each other later. You're both very smart. Now shut up and help me out!"
"We're coming, we're coming!" George cupped his hands around his mouth to amplify the sounds. "Remember, no terror unless it's a special occasion!"
"I think this qualifies as a special bloody occasion, you git!"
Fred looked down at Lee. "You know what we have to do, right?" he said without looking at George.
George thought for a moment, and then smirked. "Wingardium Leviosa?"
Fred nodded. "Ready?"
Together, they swished and flicked their wands, slowly levitating Lee back up onto the Astronomy Tower.
"See?" Lee stumbled onto the stone, body shaking. "My idea was the best one, after all."
"It was, indeed." George clapped his friend on the back. "And aren't you glad you have two friends chivalrous enough to help the weak and downtrodden in their times of need?"
Quidditch League Round 4
Holyhead Harpies, Beater 1
Prompt: "The bounce has gone from his bungee."
Word Count: 1,900 (MacBook Pages)
Optional Prompts:
2. [word] Chivalrous
4. [quote] 'I reserve actual terror for only the most special of occasions.' — Monstress, Marjorie Liu & Sana Takeda
11. [action] Hide
15. [quote] 'You two can show off to each other later. You're both very smart. Now shut up.' — Skyward, Brandon Sanderson
