Disclaimer: Bleach does not belong to me, it belongs to Tite Kubo. This story, however, is mine.

Important A/N: Before any of my frequent readers break out their torches and pitchforks at the thought of me starting another story, know that this one is already 100% complete. I wanted to finish it before I posted the chapters individually specifically so I wouldn't be juggling even more stories. So rest assured: this is no longer taking time away from my other projects.

Maelstrom

Chapter 1: Catalyst

The heir of the Kuchiki clan stared into the mischievous, twinkling golden eyes across from him and frowned deeply, trying to resist the overwhelming impulse to kill something.

"Please tell me you're joking," he ground out, hoping that none of his underlying fear made it through into his voice. The last thing Byakuya Kuchiki needed was for Yoruichi Shihoin to know she'd actually made him scared. He must have succeeded, because the Captain just shook her head and laughed.

"This is no joke, Byakuya-bo," Yoruichi said with a smile. "You need a girlfriend to help ya loosen up before you give yourself a heart attack. But since you keep refusing all of those heiresses they parade in front of you day in and day out, I thought I'd be a good friend and act as a go-between with the one house that has yet to be approached by your elders."

Byakuya lost his frown as his violet-gray eyes widened in shock, his mind utterly incapable of believing what he had just heard come out of his sensei's mouth.

"You call siccing Kuukaku Shiba on me being a friend? Are you out of your mind!?"

"Oh, come on, kid," Yoruichi sighed. "Stop talking about her like she's some kind of wild animal; once you get to know her, she's actually quite nice."

"She beat ten men twice her size to a pulp in a bar in Zaraki a week ago, Shihoin! With one hand!" Byakuya half-shouted. "How is that not insane? Why would the daughter of a noble family go cavorting around the most violent place in Soul Society unless she had some kind of underlying death wish?! No," he finished with a huff. "I refuse to be seen with her."

But Yoruichi remained undaunted; her student had given her ammunition, and she was going to use it without pity.

"Sounds like someone's been keeping tabs on her exploits," she said slyly as she took a sip of tea, and the young prince's gaze turned murderously stoic even as the lightest tint of red became visible on his face.

"I have no idea what you're talking about, Shihoin," he replied as evenly as he could. "Now, do you have any further business here?" Normally he wouldn't be so civil, but under the roof of the Kuchiki household Byakuya was expected to behave every inch like the poised heir he was supposed to be. And so that was how he would act, even if that meant he couldn't call his sensei a bitch. Which was a shame, because right now he wanted nothing more than to scream that at the top of his lungs.

"No," Yoruichi answered with supreme smugness as she finished her tea, rose and began to walk past her student towards the door, "I think I'm done here. See you the day tomorrow for your lesson, Byakuya-bo, and I expect a full report on tomorrow's rendezvous."

"Go rot in hell," he growled once Yoruichi had vanished in a flash of shunpo, taking a liberal gulp of tea and soon discovering that it was still quite scalding. Spitting it out and snarling, Byakuya cast a quick kido spell to cure his burned tongue before leaving the common room in a flash and emerging in his own private chambers.

Damn that woman. Damn her to a thousand fiery demises, and then six more for good measure. What the hell did she think she was doing, pulling rank as a noble and throwing him to the mercy of Kuukaku Shiba? It was true that the prince had no interest in the myriad sycophantic young women who clearly wanted to marry him as a political move. At the same time, though, Byakuya knew just how volatile Kuukaku could be, and wrestling with someone that strong-willed would be more of an extended military campaign than a courtship.

Realizing where his thoughts were leading him, the prince shook his head and mentally smacked himself across the face. All Yoruichi had set up was a meeting; he could just show up, act like a total reprobate and that would be that. No further commitment necessary, water under the bridge, blood washed from his hands and all that. So why had his mind immediately assumed courtship would be part of the deal?

He needed to get some air fast, before he did something horrible to either himself or to a small, innocent and possibly furry animal. Walking as calmly as he could out of his room, Byakuya's path crossed with a small cluster of servants. As they saw him they all stopped what they were doing and bowed hurriedly, as if they were afraid of being decapitated by his zanpakuto for their sluggishness.

"Good afternoon, Kuchiki-sama," they all said in unison. "May we assist you in any way, sir?"

"Is there anything you need?"

"Food perhaps?"

"Or tea?"

"No!" the prince snapped a little more harshly than intended, frustration and claustrophobia pushing him over the edge. The servants scattered to the four winds faster than Yoruichi's shunpo, leaving Byakuya feeling even worse than he had been before. Just as he hung his head with a sigh and was about to resign himself to an evening of self-pitying drunkenness, however, the voice of his advisor, Kochi, broke through Byakuya's stupor.

"Care to tell me why those poor servants were running like their heels were on fire just now, Byakuya?" he asked with a hint of wry amusement to his voice. "Did they question the masculinity of your shikai?"

"No," the heir replied evenly, "they did not, and your wit is in poor taste as usual, old man." The nickname carried a subtle hint of affection and Byakuya's lips quirked up slightly as he spoke, before returning to their practiced thin line. If there was one man alive who could give Byakuya Kuchiki a hard time and live to tell about it, it was Kochi. He had been the prince's tutor since the young man's grandfather had passed on years ago, and knew him better than Byakuya's own father.

"Please tell me you have some good news for me, Kochi," Byakuya said almost pleadingly, his heart falling into his stomach as the old man's eyes twinkled apologetically and he replied.

"Unfortunately, child," the advisor began hesitantly, "her lady Mitara Zashigen has just arrived, and insisted to be allowed to have an audience with you. Seeing as how you had already demurred twice, I figured a third refusal would be going a touch too far."

"Quite," the prince ground out, his hand reflexively clutching the hilt of Senbonzakura as his steely eyes glanced around for something to hack to pieces. Kochi sighed, feeling the young man's pain. The Zashigen were old money, silver barons; outside of the 'Noble Families', but powerful enough to know their strength and be insufferably arrogant besides. Mitara, the eldest daughter of the family and current Clan Head, was spoiled enough to make Second Division Fifth Seat Omaeda seem as humble as a saint.

"I wish there was something I could do to assuage your discomfort," Kochi began, holding out his sake flask conspiratorially, "but alas…"

Byakuya smiled in gratitude at the gesture, but shook his head.

"As much as I would love to spike my tea, old man, I need my wits about me if I am to spar with the harpy."

The tutor's dark eyes twinkled again, this time in mischief, and he smiled.

"Who said the sake was for your tea?"

Byakuya took the flask, slipped it into his robes and left the room.

"Oh, Kuchiki-san," Mitara said with blatantly over-played coquettishness, "it's so nice to finally be able to dine with you. This udon is simply superb," she finished, making a point of slurping in a particularly long noodle afterwards. Byakuya fought hard to keep his revulsion from rising to his expression and replied.

"Indeed. The chefs prepare it over the course of several hours, to make sure the flavors are particularly strong and have a chance to mingle." It's one of my favorite meals and you're ruining it, you conceited gold-digger, he added in his head, keeping a formal smile on his face to mask a clenched jaw.

"So," the Zashigen princess rejoined after suggestively mangling a poor shrimp with a series of languorous chews, "I hear that your father is feeling unwell, Byakuya. My condolences, my condolences…"

Because that is exactly what I want to discuss right now, you amoral shrew… Kuchiki simmered internally as Mirata droned on and on.

"… but if he were to die, would you not be the next in line to succeed him? In several years, of course, Gods willing," she added insincerely to avoid an outright gaffe, but the prince could read her like an open book with moldy pages and a rotting spine.

Just as he was about to reply, however, the sound of the tea-kettle shrilly announcing it was finished reached the pair. Byakuya excused himself with a nod he at least hoped looked disappointed and rose, walking quickly into the kitchen and intercepting the tea before any of the servants could get their hands on it. Withdrawing the flask and sniffing tentatively as he uncorked it, Kuchiki smiled as he smelled the sake.

"You really pulled no punches, did you, old man?" Byakuya murmured as he emptied the contents into the cup intended for Mirata. "Thank you."

Rejoining his lunch companion as soon as the deed was done, the prince handed her the spiked tea and tried not to look ecstatic while doing so. A few short minutes after she finished the drink, the Zashigen Clan leader was out cold and snoring most obnoxiously. Kuchiki promptly called in her attendant, who gazed down at his mistress with a look of surprise.

"It appears as though the lady Zashigen has suffered a fainting spell," Byakuya said evenly, as if he was reporting the weather. "Might I advise you take Mirata back to her chambers, and let her sleep it off?"

The attendant nodded rapidly and vanished, leaving Byakuya to finish his udon in peace and quiet.

"What a lightweight," he mused as he ate the soup. "There couldn't have been more than three shots in there… and she snores like a bear, to boot!" the prince shook his head ruefully, finishing off the savory broth with a gulp. As his mind ran through the women he had already flatly denied and those that were still prospective spouses, Byakuya's heart sank once again as he realized that they might as well have all been the same person.

"Is there any way out of this?" he asked no one in particular while running both hands through his hair in dismay. Senbonzakura took this chance to chime in with the last answer her partner wanted to hear, her smooth voice sly inside his head.

'Well,' she said, 'there is one way, kid…'

"No," the prince refused flatly. He wasn't going to give the demon-cat the satisfaction he knew she would get when one of those SMC snakes reported that he had gone to her arranged meeting. He wasn't going to, damn it; he wasn't…

"Fuck it," he grit out, uttering a rare curse as his willpower finally snapped. "At this point, I'd be willing to court a Hollow. And at least Kuukaku's attractive, if a bit crazed. Besides, it's only a meeting, right?"

Senbonzakura just laughed as she faded back into the recesses of her partner's mind, saying nothing more. Byakuya broke his chopsticks clean in two, got up and flashed away to his private chambers before collapsing on his bed to get some rest.

The prince was going to need every hour of sleep he could get: he might have dodged the harpy that was Mirata Zashigen though trickery, but the only way to survive the bull that was Kuukaku Shiba would be grabbing her by the horns and praying he didn't get gored.

A/N: So there you have it, the first chapter of the story! The other ones are all edited and ready to go, so I'll either update on a weekly basis, or sooner if there's enough interest (hint, hint). I'm not holding this story hostage for reviews, though... they might just make the next installment post a bit earlier than a week from now. Hope you're enjoying the story so far!