The room was dark, damp and musty, as if for many years, it had been left to rot and decay. But off in the distance, in the outside world, footsteps could be heard approaching a door.
For seven years, he had been lost in the dimensions between time and space.
The door was then opened, with a very loud creak accompanying it. A long steak of bright light shone in and revealed a room that had nothing but cheap white wallpaper, a metal folding chair and a table. A figure then stepped in front of the light, casting a great, long shadow.
They thought that with enough time, he would've been forgotten as nothing more than a mere memory.
The figure then reached over to his right, and flicked a light switch on the wall, enveloping the whole room in a bright white light. He smiled.
THEY. THOUGHT. WRONG!
He walked over to the metal chair and sat in it, making it creak slightly.
"Hello," Lunatic introduced himself, "I'm the Insane Critic, and I'm back to reading it so that you won't want to."
Be prepared for The Insane Critic: Classic Edition. Only. On. Deviantart!
An audible record skip echoes throughout the room.
"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, hold it, hold it, hold it, time out," Lunatic said as he looked up at the words being typed above his head, making the 'time-out' hand signal as he did so, "Deviantart?! Why the hell aren't I back on Fanfiction?!"
Uh, because Fanfiction deleted you last time, I'd figure you'd want a new home.
"But you're not even TLSoulDude, who then later Doctor Who'd into Tohokari-Steel!" Lunatic protested, "Are you telling me that even though he gave you permission, people gotta look you up on Deviantart just to read all about me?!"
…Yes!
Lunatic then looked as if he would protest some more as he opened his mouth to do so. He then stopped himself and took a deep breath as he calmly exhaled and said, "Alrighty then." He proceeded to look away from the words being typed above his head and instead continued to address the audience as if that particular exchange didn't happen.
"Well folks, you heard it here," he said, "You can now find me on Deviantart. Hope to see you all there."
BE THERE, OR BE SQUARE!
"Oh dear God…."