Summary: Death wants more death- and I run child-like with God's anger a step behind, back to simple sunlight, wondering as the world goes by with curled smile if anyone else saw or sensed my crime. -Charles Bukowski. An all human (sort of) Bella/Edward story.

A/N: I'm just gonna jump right in, there will be a more explanatory A/N after the first chapter.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

This is rated M for language, violence, and other stuff.

PROLOGUE

Looking back it all seems so silly, so trivial. I remember being worried about friends and homework, I remember being so anxious about my future. Future. It's not a word I hear much anymore. I remember being so stressed about grades about money about college all for this vague future I had ahead of me. Despite the haze of my own confusion my future had been in no way uncertain. I would work hard, save money and get loans, go to a good school, graduate and go on to get a good job and have a fulfilling life. It wouldn't have been exciting or unique but it would've been mine. And, goddamn, is excitement overrated.

It's a fucking joke how I used to stress over every insignificant little thing and now... well here we are. It's the future I suppose but it wasn't anywhere near close to my wildest dream. Hindsight is 20/20. It's such a strange thing to recall my priorities before. Before. I snort at my own thoughts as I sit on the roof of this enclosure of concrete and steel. I take one more drag and then glance down at my cigarette butt. Pinching it between my thumb and forefinger I flick it out and watch as the tiny ember spirals through the air landing somewhere in the chaos that lies beyond the fence.

Of course there's no point in thinking about that, no one saw it coming, nothing can be done about it now. I lift myself up and stare out for a moment before turning my back on the rising sun and walk towards the door to the stairs. I guess it catches me by surprise sometimes, that mere months ago I wouldn't have been able to comprehend the life I'm now living. There is no future anymore, no past, just survival, just one second at a time. Anything more than that is just wishful thinking. My hand reaches the cold steel knob and I turn it as the sun continues to rise once more, laughing to myself again.

"Who woulda thought the end of days would take so motherfucking long?"

Somewhere in the back of my head I can hear a dreadful beeping, I struggle to open my eyes so that I can silence that terribly annoying noise. My eyelids feel as though they've been sewn shut and I plan to reach my hand up to my face to find out exactly what the situation is but it too is sluggish. I begin to panic and try to move more of my limbs but it feels as though I'm in partially dried cement and even the slightest twitch is the result of a battle.

The beeping gets faster and I start to hear a muffled voice somewhere to my left, but it's too muddled to make out. I feel hands on my arm followed by a slight prick. The beeping continues it's pace for a few moments and suddenly everything is getting clearer my limbs seem to feel a bit freer, my eyelids start there ascent and the cotton muffling my hearing seems to dissolve and I am suddenly confronted by many things at once.

"Edward!" I hear my mother, Esme, screech excitedly from somewhere behind Carlisle's concerned face.

"Wha..." I start to question but my mouth feels like sand paper and I can't get it out, Carlisle looks confused for a moment before he rushes out of view and then back with a glass of water and straw in hand. I take a few sips and then clear my throat to speak

"What's going on?" My voice is rough but the question this time is clear.

"You were in a car accident Edward, you hit your head," Carlisle starts to explain but I cut him off

"Car accident? How long have I been out?" I struggle to recall what happened before I awoke here, like this. Carlisle looks at me with a strange mixture of pity and relief. Esme's tear filled face is suddenly by Carlisle's

"God Edward, it's been three months we thought... we thought," Her voice breaks off in a sob and Carlisle squeezes her shoulder and opens his mouth to continue

"All that matters is that you're awake now son..." his voice is full of emotion and he continues to speak but I can no longer hear what he's saying, my mind cannot get beyond my mother's words. Three Months? I've been in a coma for three months, it's too much to comprehend.

I'm brought out of my thoughts by my father's voice

"Edward? Edward?" He waves his hand in front of my gaping face.

"Three months?" I question

"Yes, just over 3 months today, but Edward..." He means to speak again but I silence him with my sudden outburst

"Where are we?" I look around the room, it doesn't look quite like a hospital other than the equipment my father obviously procured but it certainly isn't our house despite how oddly familiar it feels.

"Isle Esme," he breathes

"What are we doing here?" I suddenly recall the Island my family owns off of Maine

"That's what I've been trying to tell you Edward..." Carlisle pauses uncertainly looking to Esme for a moment before looking back to me "Something's happened..." he trails of seeming unsure of his words

"What? What's happened?" I begin to panic again, my mind overloads with all the new information

"We started hearing reports of some illness sweeping the nation and then things just started getting worse, people were rioting and looting, we thought it best to just take you here away from the chaos so you could heal without disturbance," Despite his explanation Carlise still seems to be holding back

"What aren't you telling me?" I question him and am more than a little frightened to see the grim look upon his face

"We lost communication..."

"Lost communication with who? When?" I struggle to sit up more but Carlisle puts a hand on my shoulder, effectively stopping my weak fight. He takes a deep breath and squeezes Esme's hand with the one that isn't restraining me.

"With everyone son, two months ago." There's a terrifying finality to his words and I have to take a deep breath before asking him again

"Wh.. What do you mean everyone?"

"A month after we got hear it sounded like things were only getting worse on the mainland and then suddenly the power cut, I was so worried about you that I got the generator running to keep the machines monitoring you working but by the time I tried to use my phone I found that nothing worked. No signal on any of our cell phones, no access to the internet, even the lan line went completely dead not even I dial tone," His breath comes out in a whoosh as he finishes "We haven't spoken to anybody in two months we have no idea whats happened out there but it does not appear to be anything good," His words seems so underwhelming in comparison to what they mean.

"We have to get back to shore! We have to find out what happened!" I shout "Where are Alice and Emmett?" I'm ashamed that this is the first I thought of my siblings

"Last we heard they were in Vermont with Jasper and Rosalie," Carlisle manages as Esme releases another sob.

"We have to find them," I state as I finally manage to sit up

"Normally I'd disagree with you," Carlisle starts "I'd say you need at least a few days to get a bit of your strength back but I'm afraid that really isn't an option anymore as we've run out of food and we're nearing the end of our fresh water," His voice sounds beaten

"When do we leave then?" I ask as I sway into the standing position and Carlisle holds me upright.

"As soon as you're ready son," We prepare to leave by boat in a blur planning to dock at the nearest shore. Carlisle and Esme load me into the motor boat and we start towards land. I feel a growing sense of dread as we near shore and my heart nearly stops in my chest when I first see land again. Smoke is rising from almost the entire visible coast and the smell of rot is thick in the air. We're nearing shore when I hear Esme's strained voice behind me.

"What in God's name has happened?"