Aro's Advice Column
An advice column written by Aro
Co. Written by Amarwen
Just send or E-mail your questions to Aro and Amarwen and they will answer them. Aro and Amarwen take no responsibility for the injury, sickness or death caused by results.
Dear Aro
My mothers best friend is a were-wolf and said were-wolf imprinted on me when I was born. I've always seen him as an older brother but I think he might be getting stronger feelings for me. I don't like him like that. What should I do?
Imprinted half-breed
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Dear Imprinted half-breed
Can you say hello to your family for me? Thanks. Anyway, you could tell him how you feel but it would probably hurt him. Or you could get a boy friend. Come and visit us here in Italy. We have lots of males free. It's been 7 years since you were born so you probablylook 14 – 15. Alec was changed when he and Jane were 14. I'm sure he would be interested.
Aro
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Dear Aro
My wife died many years ago and I can't get over it. Do you have any ideas that would help make me feel happy again?
Sad One
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Dear Sad One a.k.a Marcus
I fear there is little hope for you. You haven't smiled once since Didyme died. You don't even laugh when Jane tortures people. My only advice is distract yourself. Get a hobby. You need to build a bridge and get over it.
Aro
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To: almighty-aro at volturi. vampireworld. net
From: shop-till-i-drop at forks. vampireworld. net
Dear Aro
I love shopping! Nearly all I do is shop. But my family doesn't like shopping everyday like I do. Do you know anyone who loves shopping? Or ways to get my family to go shopping with me?
Love Shop Till I Drop
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To: shop-till-i-drop at forks. vampireworld. net
From: almighty-aro at volturi. vampireworld. net
Dear Alice (yes we all know its you.)
Maybe shop a little less. I hear your wardrobe is like a mall. How do you wear so many clothes? I have know clue how to get your family to shop with you. But I'm sending Heidi over as we speak err, write.
Aro
P.S You sure you don't want to join the Volturi? I'll even let Jasper join. His power would be great help as well.
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Dear Aro
I'm sad and gloomy all the time and I was wondering if you new any people that could come a cheer me up. Pooh and Tiggerare away and so they can't help.
Eeyore
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Dear Eeyore
My friend Marcus is also really sad. I'll send a plane to pick you up so you and Marcus can be depressed together. The plane should be there in 1 hour. And I think Tigger has somehow ended up here in Volterra. Apparently he is looking for She-tiggers. Pooh is in hiding from Emmett Cullen. You see the Cullen's only drink animal blood and Emmett likes bears blood the best. I have sent my best vampires out to save him.
Aro
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Dear Aro and Amarwen
I'm the one ring. I was recently chucked into Mount Doom by a little hobbit called Frodo. I some how ended up here in your book and I need a place to stay. Any ideas?
The One Ring To Rule Them All
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Dear The One Ring To Rule Them All.
Thank You! Finally someone put my name down. Anywho, back to your problem. Aro says you can't come here as we already have guests and we don'twant you to corrupt their minds. But we have sent Demetri out to find you and give you to the Romanians. Aro says you can corrupt them as much as you like. Stay where you are and don't move.
Amarwen
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Dear Aro
Please forward this onto Alec.
Alec, I love you! Will you marry me. Please, Please, Please! I watch you all the time. I follow you around everywhere and I have never met a Vampire as perfect as you.
Love Mrs Alec Volturi!
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Alec was to shocked to reply. Aro didn't want to get into this and Amarwen was rolling around laughing so Jane took over the computer.
Dear Mrs Alec Volturi!
Go get a life. Alec's my brother and already likes someone *Cough* Amarwen *Cough*. Following him around is just plain creepy. If you have any form of contact with him I will have Demetri hunt you down and I will show you how powerful my power is. You will have a long slow death.
Jane
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Dear Aro and Amarwen
In my world we are fighting a war against the evil King, Galbatorix. My dragon, Saphira, and I were wondering if you vampires wanted to help out war.
Eragon and Saphira
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Dear Eragon and Saphira
*Scream!* You're Real! I'm a huge fan. Of course we'll help. At the moment I've sorta taken over the Volturi so they are under my control. I'll round up some Vampires. I wonder if Galbatorix's wards stop vampire teeth. I'd happily drink his blood. Even though I'm like the Cullen's and only drink animal blood. I'll see what I can do.
Amarwen
P.S I can't wait to meet you!
A.N. Hope you like my fan fic so far. Please review. If anyone wants to send in advice for Aro or me to answer they can. If you already have to answer in mind you can send that in as well. They can be letter looking or E-mail looking. Please try to make them funny. And I would like the names of who they are addressed to and the character who sent it. And they don't have to be from Twilight. They can be from any book you like e.g. Lord of the Rings. They don't have to be to both me and Aro. They can be just to me or just to Aro. Or to any other character like with Mrs Alec Volturi! writing to Alec. If you find any spelling or grammar mistakes tell me. And the E-mails are NOT real.