Okay, I made an attempt at these types of fics a few years ago and failed miserably. I don't remember whether I posted the results on this glorious site or not, but I'm posting the newest attempt here now, and I hope you enjoy it.

Here's a short back story on the creation of these fics: I own a deck of Harry Potter playing cards with pics from the Chamber of Secrets movie on them. I took out the two blank cards, as well as the two jokers, and shuffled the deck. I then dealt the cards two at a time and wrote down the results. There are 26 pairs total (duh) and this fic will be about 26 chapters long, which means that each chapter will be a different pair.

Any questions? Feel free to ask in a review or PM. Oh, and please review. It makes me feel loved. Now sit back, relax, and enjoy the awesomness of...

Random Adventures in Hogwarts

Chapter 1

The Gryffindor Sword

The Nimbus 2000

"Sleep tight, my lovelies," Emelia said, and blew a kiss to the contents of the room before gently closing the door. Emelia was a crazed Harry Potter fangirl, and owned nearly every money-making gimmick Warner Bros and JK Rowling put on the marked for the famous book/movie series.

She ha at least one of each of the posters for the (so far) six movies, – and if a movie had more than one style of poster, like Order of the Phoenix, she had all the different styles as well – all 7 books, all the little side-books that JK wrote to go with the series, every card in the Trading Card Game (this was the product of several years of collecting; on a side note, she was so good at the TCG that nobody wanted to play against her anymore), little figurines...you name it, she had it.

But her prize possession was her $200,000 replica of the "original" Gryffindor sword that was used in the movies. Of course, there was a 99% chance it was a complete gimmick, and she was ripped off, but Emelia didn't care. All she cared about was that she had a life-sized sword to go with her life-sized Nimbus 2000, which went with her life-sized Harry doll, which had several different outfits. Consequently, she owned all the outfits.

Yes, Emelia was definitely obsessed. She kept all her over-priced paraphernalia in a special room of her house, which she'd had painted specially so that each of the four walls represented one of Hogwarts' four houses. She'd even installed a very complicated, state of the art security system on just that room to prevent anyone from getting in and stealing her "treasures." Once a month, she had a "Potter-a-thon," where she'd watch all the movies, first in ascending order and then in descending order, all day long.

One day, Emelia was hard at work dusting off her collection, polishing what could be polished, straightening everything out, and just tidying up the room in general. After she was done, she was so exhausted that she fell asleep on one of the four four-poster beds in the room (each decorated for a specific house and against their corresponding wall), with no thought that she'd only just made each of the beds.

She awoke to sounds of someone rummaging through her kitchen. Silently, she got to her feet and grabbed the replica of Luna Lovegood's wand, which was laying on the bedside table by the Ravenclaw bed, which was the one Emelia had fallen asleep on. She tiptoed out of the room, holding the wand in front of her the way she'd seen the wizards and witches do in the HP movies.

She rounded the corner into the kitchen...and saw a burglar stealing all her silverware!

"Hey!" she shrieked, "That's min! Accio silverware!" To her somewhat surprise, the bag of silverware flew from the thief's hand into hers. Following some crazy impulse, she ran into the HP room and grabbed her Sword, dropping Luna's wand on the floor as she did. She then went back out into the kitchen, where the burglar was still standing in shock. Emelia held the Sword out in front of her.

"Stay back," she warned. "Leave now, or I'll be forced to do something drastic."

The thief backed up slowly, then grabbed a kitchen knife and tried to stab Emelia with it. Emelia drove the Sword through his chest, then just stared in shock.

Just as she was trying to decide what to do with the body, the Nimbus 2000 came flying in and swept the body – and the blood – out of the house.

At that point, Emelia woke up. She was still in her precious room, laying on the Ravenclaw bed, as she had been since she'd finished cleaning the room. She blinked, confused, then got up and re-made the bed. She then grabbed the HP movies and took them into the living room with her, putting the first one in.

It was going to be a late night.

End

Well? What did you think? Most of them will be approximately this length, some longer and some shorter. It all depends on which card pair I'm writing for and how much of an idea I can get for it. Please review and tell me if this chapter was any good! Next chapter: the Golden Snitch and the other Quidditch balls. Stay tuned!