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A/N: This is dedicated to my friend rhk11. It's been a long time since we've talked…or um, chatted in social networking. And I miss you terribly, what with school and everything. I hope you're doing fine. And to you, my other readers, I hope you like this. :) 'Nuff talking tho, proceed!
You know, I broke up with Theo. Well, we didn't really break up. There wasn't an 'us' to start with anyway. Funny how that happened. I used to call him a mushroom—now you see him, now you don't. I don't really see him quite often in person. We meet during holidays every year, and that's just it. He sends me a letter once in a while. At times, he ignores mine, and I ignore his just to spite him. I don't know if it bothers him or not if I ever did.
Did it even matter to him? I guess I would never know.
We ran around in circles, dancing around each other until we have no energy left. Or maybe until we just got tired of those secret glances, awkward silences, and lingering touches when we're together. Maybe he couldn't bear with the long distance, with us studying in different universities. Or maybe he found someone else. Someone who's a lot better than me, someone who can give him more time and attention, someone who can give him excitement, someone who is prettier, someone who is more liberated, someone…not like me.
I should be hurt right? I mean, we weren't official, but hey, at least we had something. What do other people call it? Mutual understanding? Yeah, I think that's it. Or maybe it was just all in my head. If it were so then I'd give myself a pat in the back for a wonderful imagination, leading myself on like that for nothing.
I should be hurt. But I'm not. I just feel sorry about what could have been. And that's just it. No fights, no tears, no heartache. Not even a good bye.
I don't know if I regretted the times I spent with him. I feel like I shouldn't, he made me happy even just for a while.
And me? I hope I made him happy too. I hope those smiles that came over his face and that hearty laugh he made because of a comment I said were genuine.
But I guess, he's not really not really for me nor me for him. To tell you the truth, I think that deep down, I may have had the intention of using him to forget you. But I failed. Because I can't forget you. I never will.
-Hermione
A/N: So! Sooooo, did you like it? I hope you did. Please let me know by dropping a review! :)
Love,
Red