DBZ TEEN MOMS
Join us this season on "Teen Moms" as we travel to the Dragonball Z world to follow young moms, ChiChi, Bulma and 18.
ChiChi sits down with the camera crew. The bright lights bother her but she's excited to do the show. The main cameraman nods at her to go ahead and start her soliloquy. She clears her throat and takes a deep breath, "So like, my boyfriend's name is Goku. He's a martial arts champion and we are so in love right now. My Dad is supportive. He pays for everything we need right now. Everyone knows him as the Ox-King. Most people are terrified to be around him but not Goku. Goku's not scared of anything. I like that about him. I know my Dad wishes that we would just get married but I'm waiting for Goku to propose to me. I think I deserve that fairy tale wedding and all. I mean, just because we already have a baby doesn't mean I let go of my dreams and all. Goku's going to do it soon... propose to me, I mean, like I'm sure when you talk to him, he's gonna be all about him and me and when we're going to get married.
The camera crew catches up with Goku who is in the backyard training. Goku looks up at everyone, "Hi! Are you here to train too? I can't wait for the World Martial Arts Tournament! I wonder who I'll be up against. I'm hungry. Are you hungry? I'm gonna go get me a sandwich, be right back!" They waited around for over an hour, Goku never came back.
The production crew headed to Capsule Corporation to interview another teen mom. She is ready for her monologue. She smooths her long blue hair and smiles confidently at the camera. "My name is Bulma Briefs. My parents own Capsule Corporation so I'm pretty set for life already. I'm smart, beautiful and very confident. I like creating things, you know, inventing things but like having a baby was way cooler than all the other stuff I've ever done. My boyfriend at the time was Yamcha; but he's not the father of my baby. He was really upset when he found out that I had been sleeping around on him cause he's usually the one that does the whole "sleeping around" bit in our relationship. We've broken up now but are trying to stay friends. I still love him just not like I love my baby's daddy. My baby boy's name is Trunks and I gave him my last name cause his daddy isn't around much. His name is Vegeta. He's a prince, like literally a prince! Isn't that cool. Yeah... it's cool. I'm awesome enough to, you know, bang a prince and all." Bulma giggles and looks away from the camera.
The crew was hesitant to interview Vegeta. But, Bulma shooed everyone out to where he was training in a circular-looking pod called the Gravity Room. Vegeta wasn't happy with the disturbance. "What do you want you weak pathetic human beings? Get that camera out of my face! I'm training here! Begone or I'll kill you all!" The camera crew runs for their lives.
After lunch, the production team tracked down Yamcha. He was pleasantly surprised that he was being interviewed for the show. "Sure I love Bulma... I love women in general you know. Females are really fascinating. I used to be scared to death of 'em. Not anymore though. Yeah, I was pretty shocked by Bulma getting knocked up and by Vegeta of all people, I mean really? That guy killed me once! How could she do this to me. We still hang out together but kid's not mine, you know what I'm saying?" The crew rolls their eyes and thanks Yamcha for his time. They load up their van and head to Kame Island.
Krillen and Android 18 are sitting together on the couch holding hands while the crew sets up the lights and cameras. Krillen is excited to share their experience on the show. "Wow do we have a love story! Dr. Gero created 18 to kill Goku and take over the world! Yeah, I know! And even though she was this evil, destructive half-human creature thingy... I still thought she was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen in my life. I would venture to say that I loved her from the moment I set eyes on her... after I shit my pants of course. Thought she was going to kill me. Oh boy." Krillen chuckles and looks at 18. She smiles at Krillen and then glares at the production manager, "How much will I be getting paid to do this stupid show?"
The next day, ChiChi puts Gohan down for a nap. Goku is out somewhere and she is getting ready to do the dishes. She motions for the production team to join her at the kitchen table. She hurriedly moves several stacks of dirty dishes out of the way. "It seems like day in and day out all I do is cook and do dishes, I mean, Gohan here... well... he eats a lot. I mean, like, more than "the average human being" a lot. I want him to be healthy so I only give him organic food, so if I'm not cooking or doing dishes then I'm out in the garden doing what I can to provide healthy vegetables for my baby. Goku does his part too, you know, like, he'll, uh, go catch some fish and cut up trees for firewood. But he.." She sighs and looks down, "He's gone a lot. Guess he's got more important things to do than to be here with us. I'm proud of him and all, like he's been saving the world since he was a baby so like that's cool and all, but I just wish that he were here to sit on the couch with me and maybe take me shopping or out to eat... something like that." Gohan starts crying from the other room. ChiChi excuses herself to go get him.
Once ChiChi returns with Gohan, Goku walks through the kitchen door. "Hi ChiChi! Hi Gohan! Being good for your Mom?" He turns and waves at the camera crew and production team. He grabs some food off a plate that ChiChi had set aside for him earlier. He kisses ChiChi's cheek then kisses the top of Gohan's head and leaves.
ChiChi puts Gohan in his high chair and begins to complain, "See what I mean? Didn't he SEE all of these dishes, I mean, really? Didn't he see I could have used some help with Gohan! UGH! I can't believe he expects me to do EVERYTHING! What a chump! I cannot believe it! He better not even think about asking me to marry him today because that answer would be N. O. NO!" She turns in time to see the camera crew slipping out the back door. "HEY!" She yells. "You should help me with these dishes! Hey! Hey! I'm talking to you!" She starts throwing dirty dishes at everyone outside while they run to their vans.
Back at Capsule Corporation, Bulma is hanging out in her personal laboratory working on some experiments while Trunks coos quietly in his baby seat. Bulma tries to explain what she is currently working on for her next project, "In physics, the angular velocity is defined as the rate of change of angular displacement and is a vector quantity (more precisely, a pseudovector) which specifies the angular speed (rotational speed) of an object and the axis about which the object is rotating. The SI unit of angular velocity is radians per second, although it may be measured in other units such as degrees per second, degrees per hour, etc. Angular velocity is usually represented by the symbol omega (ω, rarely Ω). The direction of the angular velocity vector is perpendicular to the plane of rotation, in a direction which is usually specified by the right-hand rule." (wikipedia) Trunks falls asleep and the camera crew does too.
On Kame Island, Krillen is feeding Marron and cooking a romantic dinner to eat later on in the evening. He has already bought roses and placed them everywhere and is trying to decide on the perfect dessert and what he should wear. He happily chats with the production team and camera crew. "I'm really excited for tonight. I'm going to ask 18 to marry me... again." He opens a different jar of baby food for Marron. He continues, "I've asked her already... 37 times but hey! 38 could be my lucky number, I'm just saying!" He makes kissie-kissie noises at his daughter and asks her in a baby voice, "Do you want Mommy and Daddy to get married, Marron? Huh? Huh? Yes you do! Oh yes you do! Daddy wants to marry Mommy in the worst way... oh yes I do! Whose a pretty baby? Yes you are!" He blushes and looks back at the crew; they are embarrassed for him. He hurries up and finishes his story, "So I went into town today, I mean, WE went into town, me and Marron, I don't go anywhere without her! We picked out six dozen roses and placed them all around, I mean, I did that part while Marron slept. Actually 18 was sleeping too. Now that I think about it... 18 is still sleeping. Anyway, I have dinner in the oven and am thinking about making a "death by chocolate" cake. Pun intended. 18 will love that! I still don't know what I'm going to wear tonight. I would call some of my friends to come over but..." He continues to feed Marron, "I'm sure they're out somewhere being real men."
The crew heads upstairs to interview Android 18. When the team manager knocks on the door, 18 opens the door and yells, "Go away! I'm sleeping! Krillen! Get rid of these bozos NOW!" Everyone starts running down the steps and they hear a door slam.