Confession
Disclaimer: I now state I do not own any of the people mentioned in this fan fic (though I'm welcome to offers David!) This is purely for entertainment.
Rating: If you're old enough to watch the show you can read this.
Author's note: While watching Sanctuary I was so shocked by what a bitch Buffy was being. So this is my little twist on the story.
Angel clenched his fists. Each of Buffy's words felt like being staked repeatedly. He turned away hoping she would just leave him alone with his miserable life.
"And you know what Angel? Whenever I sleep with Riley I won't have to worry that I'll wake up and he'll be off killing my friends. He's normal Angel. And I want him. What we had doesn't even compare. Have a nice life Angel. Cause I want no part of it!" Buffy spat, pure venom lacing her tone.
Angel couldn't take anymore. He spun around, grabbing the tops of her arms and shaking her.
"You have no idea do you? I'll never forget? Ring any bells. Good for you, your happy. But don't you dare sully the memory of what we had. I gave everything I ever wanted up for you! Don't you dare make me doubt what I did!" he yelled.
Buffy was too shocked to move. Angel had never looked so hurt and angry as he did right now. Not even when she sent him to hell.
"What did you give up, huh? What? Apart from me that is! You left me. And you thing that's a sacrifice. The only thing you want is your humanity! And you'd never give that up!" she spat, losing her cool composure.
She knew instantly that she'd said the wrong thing. He flinched and dropped his grip on her arms. He moved away and sat down one of the hard chairs nearby.
"Just go Buffy," he whispered his voice choked with emotion.
"No. Your gonna tell me exactly what your hiding and your gonna tell me now. You don't just say something like that then clam up," she ordered.
Angel snapped again.
"You really wanna know?" he asked sharply.
"Yes," she said bracing herself.
"I was human. How's not important," he said cutting her off before she asked the inevitable question. "It was at Thanksgiving. When I found out I went to find you. You were standing by the beach. You looked so beautiful. And we had this one amazing kiss. It was everything Buffy. Everything I wanted. I was human and I was with you," he said a look of pain crossing his face.
"What happened?" she whispered falling into the chair beside him.
"We went back to my apartment. We talked. We agreed that we should take time to sort things out in our own heads. So you started to leave and I followed you. Just before you left you put your hand on top of mine… That was it. We grabbed each other then we were against the fridge, then we were on the table, which collapsed…" he looked at her. She was staring at him eyes wide, a slight blush covering her cheeks.
"We…we were together?" she whispered tears filling her eyes.
He tore his gaze away from her and nodded.
"What was it like?" she choked out, the tears starting to fall.
As much as he wanted too he couldn't reach out to her and hold her.
"It was amazing…I've never felt anything like it. We made love over and over again. We fell asleep in my bed. I was still inside of you. I was part of you. Then we ate. You introduced me to the joy's of peanut butter and chocolate and ice cream. We were so happy. Then Doyle told me that the demon was still alive. I went to kill it but I was too weak. You rescued me just in time. Just before it died the demon said something. Together we are powerful, alone we are dead. I went to the Oracles. They control all evil fighting in the world. I asked them if it was true. They said that you would die sooner if I wasn't fighting alongside you. So I begged them for your life to spared. I made a deal. They'd take back my humanity to keep you safe. They turned back time. They gave me enough time to go back to tell you and so we could spend out last moments together. They gave only me the memory to carry so I could stop what was going to happen. You were devastated. You told me you'd never forget. But there was no way you could remember. Then we were back in the office and the demon burst in, I killed. You walked away. I wasn't ever going to tell you. You said to me you could never go on with your life if you remembered. What we had. What we could have had. So I never told you. Then you pushed it. I'm sorry," he said.
Buffy was in total shock, Knowing that she had everything she wanted for one day only to have it taken away from her.
The tears came and they just wouldn't stop.
Angel was frozen in place.
"Buffy? What's wrong?" Cordelia's voice asked rushing over and hugging the slayer. If Buffy hadn't been so tormented she would have been shocked. Cordelia had definitely matured.
"Angel what did you do to her?" she asked.
"I told her," he said tonelessly.
Cordelia's eyes widened and her grip on Buffy tightened.
Buffy kept on crying.
"I'm taking her back to your apartment. Go stake some vamps," Cordelia directed leading the hysterical slayer away.
Angel still sat there thinking about what he had done.
"Why didn't he tell me Cordelia?" Buffy asked in the cab back to Angel Investigations.
"Buffy he didn't want to hurt you," Cordelia explained for what seemed like the millionth time.
"But I said so many horrible things!"
"Buffy quit with the pity party! He has had a hell of a year. He was poisoned, nearly killed you, and had to leave Sunnydale to remove the temptation. He suffered because he couldn't help anybody. He gained you then lost you again, this is after he was hypnotised and went all soft. Then Doyle died so Angel wouldn't have too," Cordelia flinched at the memory.
"Then he had to come and rescue me after I was kidnapped and my eyes were nearly gouged out. Added to that he thought he was back to bad Angel. A detective found out who he was and went from wanting him to mild dislike. I got pregnant by a demon and we had to exorcise a little boy. Kate's dad died and she blamed him. Let's not forget he was enslaved and made to kill other demons. Faith then tried to kill him and he puts a lot on the line to help her. Then YOU turn up, say some way harsh things and then expect him to be able to deal? He's had it hard since he left so don't come along and pretend you're hard done by. You can move on. He can't. He's gonna spend the rest of his life on his own. Wesley will die. The old gang. Giles. Me. And you. He'll watch us all die and there is nothing he can do. He'll be on his own. Don't you dare come here and pretend he's nothing. In the time I've been working with him he's been the best friend I have ever had. I felt sorry for you at first but now your back to being 'Oh poor little me, I have to save the world and my boyfriend's evil'. I may not be a slayer but I promise you I will kick your ass if you ever say anything like that to him again. And I'm sure Faith could bust out of prison to help me," Cordelia finished breathlessly.
Buffy stared at her in amazement. Where had all this come from. Where was the superficial Queen of the Snowflake dance?
"Why are you so bothered? You can't screw him," Buffy lashed out bitterly.
Cordelia wasted no time in slapping the slayer.
"Buffy Summers you have turned into a top class bitch. You come to LA and hurt Angel then lash out at me," Cordelia paused when the cab stopped. After paying the driver she turned once again to the blonde in front of her.
"Here's the key to Angel's apartment. Get some rest then leave before he comes back. I'm not trying to be mean Buffy but he and Wesley are all I have and I'll be damned if I let you hurt either one of them," with a toss of the hair Cordelia left Buffy in the middle of the street looking as if a emotional hurricane had hit her.
Buffy tiredly walked across Angel's apartment. Now she knew why it had been so familiar to her when she had walked in there this earlier that day.
She walked over to the table. In reality Angel had never thrown her onto the pine surface and made her feel whole for the second time in her life.
She sighed and moved into Angel's bedroom. She nearly staggered at the pure Angelness of the room. She could just imagine falling asleep in his arms snuggled on that bed.
She yawned. Bed didn't seem like such a bad idea. She crawled under the covers and let sleep overcome her.
When she next opened her eyes Angel was sitting on the chair in the corner of the room staring at her.
"Sorry," she murmured before standing and straightening her clothes.
"No need," he replied.
"I'm sorry," she told him quietly.
Angel nodded.
"Bye Angel. Tell Cordelia thank you. I deserved all she gave me," she said. Remembering the gesture she had made that had sparked what from what he said to be the best day of her life, she reached out and touched his hand. Angel's eyes locked onto hers.
"Bye Buffy," he whispered.
With one last longing look they parted, neither sure if it was the last time.
Angel gaped at Cordelia.
"You hit her?" It took some believing. Cordelia Vs the most powerful slayer in history. That was something he most definitely would not like to see.
"Well she was being spiteful. Just because she's gotta save the world doesn't mean to say that she can mess with people I care about," she defended.
The next thing she knew Angel was hugging her.
"Thank you," he whispered in wonder.
Cordelia smiled and hugged him back with equal force.
Buffy stood on the stairs to Angel's apartment watching the scene unfold. She'd got half way to Sunnydale when she realised that she'd left something unsaid. She knew she should have told him that she did care and her previous words had been lies. But now it looked like she wads too late. Angel wasn't automatically jumping to her defence. That seemed to be happening a lot lately. And now he was hugging Cordelia.
Disclaimer: I now state I do not own any of the people mentioned in this fan fic (though I'm welcome to offers David!) This is purely for entertainment.
Rating: If you're old enough to watch the show you can read this.
Author's note: While watching Sanctuary I was so shocked by what a bitch Buffy was being. So this is my little twist on the story.
Angel clenched his fists. Each of Buffy's words felt like being staked repeatedly. He turned away hoping she would just leave him alone with his miserable life.
"And you know what Angel? Whenever I sleep with Riley I won't have to worry that I'll wake up and he'll be off killing my friends. He's normal Angel. And I want him. What we had doesn't even compare. Have a nice life Angel. Cause I want no part of it!" Buffy spat, pure venom lacing her tone.
Angel couldn't take anymore. He spun around, grabbing the tops of her arms and shaking her.
"You have no idea do you? I'll never forget? Ring any bells. Good for you, your happy. But don't you dare sully the memory of what we had. I gave everything I ever wanted up for you! Don't you dare make me doubt what I did!" he yelled.
Buffy was too shocked to move. Angel had never looked so hurt and angry as he did right now. Not even when she sent him to hell.
"What did you give up, huh? What? Apart from me that is! You left me. And you thing that's a sacrifice. The only thing you want is your humanity! And you'd never give that up!" she spat, losing her cool composure.
She knew instantly that she'd said the wrong thing. He flinched and dropped his grip on her arms. He moved away and sat down one of the hard chairs nearby.
"Just go Buffy," he whispered his voice choked with emotion.
"No. Your gonna tell me exactly what your hiding and your gonna tell me now. You don't just say something like that then clam up," she ordered.
Angel snapped again.
"You really wanna know?" he asked sharply.
"Yes," she said bracing herself.
"I was human. How's not important," he said cutting her off before she asked the inevitable question. "It was at Thanksgiving. When I found out I went to find you. You were standing by the beach. You looked so beautiful. And we had this one amazing kiss. It was everything Buffy. Everything I wanted. I was human and I was with you," he said a look of pain crossing his face.
"What happened?" she whispered falling into the chair beside him.
"We went back to my apartment. We talked. We agreed that we should take time to sort things out in our own heads. So you started to leave and I followed you. Just before you left you put your hand on top of mine… That was it. We grabbed each other then we were against the fridge, then we were on the table, which collapsed…" he looked at her. She was staring at him eyes wide, a slight blush covering her cheeks.
"We…we were together?" she whispered tears filling her eyes.
He tore his gaze away from her and nodded.
"What was it like?" she choked out, the tears starting to fall.
As much as he wanted too he couldn't reach out to her and hold her.
"It was amazing…I've never felt anything like it. We made love over and over again. We fell asleep in my bed. I was still inside of you. I was part of you. Then we ate. You introduced me to the joy's of peanut butter and chocolate and ice cream. We were so happy. Then Doyle told me that the demon was still alive. I went to kill it but I was too weak. You rescued me just in time. Just before it died the demon said something. Together we are powerful, alone we are dead. I went to the Oracles. They control all evil fighting in the world. I asked them if it was true. They said that you would die sooner if I wasn't fighting alongside you. So I begged them for your life to spared. I made a deal. They'd take back my humanity to keep you safe. They turned back time. They gave me enough time to go back to tell you and so we could spend out last moments together. They gave only me the memory to carry so I could stop what was going to happen. You were devastated. You told me you'd never forget. But there was no way you could remember. Then we were back in the office and the demon burst in, I killed. You walked away. I wasn't ever going to tell you. You said to me you could never go on with your life if you remembered. What we had. What we could have had. So I never told you. Then you pushed it. I'm sorry," he said.
Buffy was in total shock, Knowing that she had everything she wanted for one day only to have it taken away from her.
The tears came and they just wouldn't stop.
Angel was frozen in place.
"Buffy? What's wrong?" Cordelia's voice asked rushing over and hugging the slayer. If Buffy hadn't been so tormented she would have been shocked. Cordelia had definitely matured.
"Angel what did you do to her?" she asked.
"I told her," he said tonelessly.
Cordelia's eyes widened and her grip on Buffy tightened.
Buffy kept on crying.
"I'm taking her back to your apartment. Go stake some vamps," Cordelia directed leading the hysterical slayer away.
Angel still sat there thinking about what he had done.
"Why didn't he tell me Cordelia?" Buffy asked in the cab back to Angel Investigations.
"Buffy he didn't want to hurt you," Cordelia explained for what seemed like the millionth time.
"But I said so many horrible things!"
"Buffy quit with the pity party! He has had a hell of a year. He was poisoned, nearly killed you, and had to leave Sunnydale to remove the temptation. He suffered because he couldn't help anybody. He gained you then lost you again, this is after he was hypnotised and went all soft. Then Doyle died so Angel wouldn't have too," Cordelia flinched at the memory.
"Then he had to come and rescue me after I was kidnapped and my eyes were nearly gouged out. Added to that he thought he was back to bad Angel. A detective found out who he was and went from wanting him to mild dislike. I got pregnant by a demon and we had to exorcise a little boy. Kate's dad died and she blamed him. Let's not forget he was enslaved and made to kill other demons. Faith then tried to kill him and he puts a lot on the line to help her. Then YOU turn up, say some way harsh things and then expect him to be able to deal? He's had it hard since he left so don't come along and pretend you're hard done by. You can move on. He can't. He's gonna spend the rest of his life on his own. Wesley will die. The old gang. Giles. Me. And you. He'll watch us all die and there is nothing he can do. He'll be on his own. Don't you dare come here and pretend he's nothing. In the time I've been working with him he's been the best friend I have ever had. I felt sorry for you at first but now your back to being 'Oh poor little me, I have to save the world and my boyfriend's evil'. I may not be a slayer but I promise you I will kick your ass if you ever say anything like that to him again. And I'm sure Faith could bust out of prison to help me," Cordelia finished breathlessly.
Buffy stared at her in amazement. Where had all this come from. Where was the superficial Queen of the Snowflake dance?
"Why are you so bothered? You can't screw him," Buffy lashed out bitterly.
Cordelia wasted no time in slapping the slayer.
"Buffy Summers you have turned into a top class bitch. You come to LA and hurt Angel then lash out at me," Cordelia paused when the cab stopped. After paying the driver she turned once again to the blonde in front of her.
"Here's the key to Angel's apartment. Get some rest then leave before he comes back. I'm not trying to be mean Buffy but he and Wesley are all I have and I'll be damned if I let you hurt either one of them," with a toss of the hair Cordelia left Buffy in the middle of the street looking as if a emotional hurricane had hit her.
Buffy tiredly walked across Angel's apartment. Now she knew why it had been so familiar to her when she had walked in there this earlier that day.
She walked over to the table. In reality Angel had never thrown her onto the pine surface and made her feel whole for the second time in her life.
She sighed and moved into Angel's bedroom. She nearly staggered at the pure Angelness of the room. She could just imagine falling asleep in his arms snuggled on that bed.
She yawned. Bed didn't seem like such a bad idea. She crawled under the covers and let sleep overcome her.
When she next opened her eyes Angel was sitting on the chair in the corner of the room staring at her.
"Sorry," she murmured before standing and straightening her clothes.
"No need," he replied.
"I'm sorry," she told him quietly.
Angel nodded.
"Bye Angel. Tell Cordelia thank you. I deserved all she gave me," she said. Remembering the gesture she had made that had sparked what from what he said to be the best day of her life, she reached out and touched his hand. Angel's eyes locked onto hers.
"Bye Buffy," he whispered.
With one last longing look they parted, neither sure if it was the last time.
Angel gaped at Cordelia.
"You hit her?" It took some believing. Cordelia Vs the most powerful slayer in history. That was something he most definitely would not like to see.
"Well she was being spiteful. Just because she's gotta save the world doesn't mean to say that she can mess with people I care about," she defended.
The next thing she knew Angel was hugging her.
"Thank you," he whispered in wonder.
Cordelia smiled and hugged him back with equal force.
Buffy stood on the stairs to Angel's apartment watching the scene unfold. She'd got half way to Sunnydale when she realised that she'd left something unsaid. She knew she should have told him that she did care and her previous words had been lies. But now it looked like she wads too late. Angel wasn't automatically jumping to her defence. That seemed to be happening a lot lately. And now he was hugging Cordelia.