Finally, it is out! Wow, I thought I would never get this done. Truth be told, this chapter originally was going to be the one shot but after I wrote all the other chapters for Just a kiss it simply didn't fit anymore. So I erased, added, erased and then added more, well, the list goes on ;-) Which, of course, is not an excuse for letting you all wait. So please forgive me!
Everybody who reviewed and followed the prequel, thank you so much! I appreciate all of you and it makes me very happy to know that you like my little story. Arigatou :-)
To everyone who didn't read Just a kiss, this is the final chapter and the only reason I am posting this separately is that I didn't want to change the rating of the original story which can stand by itself without the lemon. But I just love Hotsuma & Shusei too much to not have them make out :D
This is M all the way so please be warned :-)
They arrived at the traditional family restaurant fifteen minutes later.
All the way there, Hotsuma's mind was reeling. They had kissed. It really had happened. And even though he knew, it was a lot to take in. To him, above all, the most amazing thing was that Shusei had let him and even had reciprocated.
The touch of Shusei's lips on his still felt fresh, like a mint candy only much more sweeter. Unconsciously, his hand went up to his mouth to confirm the foreign but yet so familiar sensation.
That was when he noticed Shusei looking at him with gentle eyes, the twinkle of a caressing smile in them. Hotsuma quickly withdrew his fingers and looked down to the ground, a gruff response on his tongue that would cover up his growing embarrassment in form of the red heat that was creeping up his cheeks.
"Hmpf… I was just… " He was cut off by Shusei who captured his retreating hand with his own. Hotsuma looked up into his partner's face. By now, the smile had reached his lips which got Hotsuma distracted instantly - which was a good thing since the grumpy answer he had just been about to give was wiped from his brain. As his eyes wandered from Shusei's lips to take in the utterly handsome face he noticed, to his very surprise, that Shusei's cheeks were rather pink as well.
The brunette squeezed his hand lightly before he brought it up to his lips, putting a small kiss on each fingertip.
"I know. I feel the same way, too."
All Hotsuma could do was watch in complete awe since his thought process was interrupted by the affectionate gesture, almost as if it contained some sort of magic that brought down his higher brain functions.
Oh.
The words sunk in.
Ohh.
As an answer, Hotsuma did the only thing he could - he slid his fingers around Shusei's and squeezed back, smiling back at him.
They covered the remaining distance to the restaurant like this, enjoying each other's company. No words were necessary. When they reached it Hotsuma reluctantly let go of his lover's hand to hold open the door and they stepped in.
It was a tiny place with only two handful of tables or so but its interior looked inviting and lovingly cared for. Each table was decorated with a vase that held a single red tulip.
Once they were seated and their waiter had retreated to prepare the beverages and their food, Shusei leaned forward, smiling.
"This is a nice place. How come we never went here before?"
Folding his o-shibori and placing it back on the table, Hotsuma decided to tell the truth.
"Sairi-kun recommended it. Hard to believe but this son of a bitch does have some taste after all."
Shusei chuckled.
"What did you do to him to make him share this insiders' tip?"
"I called him a pansy and threatened to kick his sorry ass." Like hell would he tell Shusei what had happened earlier this morning. But he admitted to himself, somewhat reluctantly, that he would need to thank the blonde nuisance. Surely, he would do that when nobody else was looking.
"Did you really… I see." Shusei grinned back at him.
Shortly thereafter, the waiter came back with the tea and the only dish that was on the menu, okonomiyaki. It looked mouthwatering.
"Itadakimasu." Shusei said quietly with both his hand put together in his lap before he picked up his chopsticks.
Quickly, Hotsuma mumbled the same and dug in. The food was really good and he now noticed how hungry he actually was. After a few minutes of gluttonous silence he felt his partner's eyes on him and looked up.
Shusei had barely touched his meal. Although his partner's eyes were directed on him, he seemed to look through him rather than at him.
"Anything wrong with the pancake?" Hotsuma asked in the most casual voice possible. He didn't want to pick on the eating topic. Although, when Shusei didn't answer right away an alarm bell went off in the back of his head.
He put his chopsticks down and without thinking, he slid a hand across the table to capture Shusei's slender fingers, enveloping them with his.
"Shusei?"
Wherever the brunette's mind had been, the sound of his name brought him back into focus and Shusei blinked, taking a deep breath.
"Ah, it's nothing. I'm just a little tired." Shusei lifted the corners of his mouth into what was supposed to be a reassuring smile but Hotsuma could see that it didn't reach his partner's eyes.
"Don't you dare and give me that crap." He said as quietly as possible since they were in a public space which was more or less a futile task. And hell, it wasn't like he gave a damn about other people. Angrily, he pointed his finger at Shusei with his free hand.
"You're not giving up, are you?" Shusei said with what sounded a little bit of amusement.
"No, I'm not." He smirked back at him. "You are the most important person to me so I want to know." He said matter of factly, looking straight at Shusei, his hand still covering his.
There was a minute of silence between them and Hotsuma would have had given everything for getting a glimpse into the brunette's head. He was on the edge of his chair, literally, when Shusei finally broke the silence.
"I never wanted to be a burden to you, Hotsuma." Voice calm, Shusei was looking down at his hand that was still being held by him, strands of brunette hair hanging in his face, blocking his eyes.
Hearing those words, Hotsuma was about to jump up and shout at his partner but something hold him back. Maybe this time, it was better to have Shusei get it out once and for all.
Hotsuma had always been one to quickly brush off emotional conversations. Until now, he had seen it as a weakness, a waste of time - not to mention that they had made him terribly uncomfortable, they just weren't his pair of shoes - but come to think of it, he now had to admit to himself that he had been afraid of what Shusei would have to say. He had been so desperately afraid of loosing him that he had thought avoiding this conversation would solve the problem. He had been the proverbial ostrich, sticking his head into the sand pretending that if he couldn't see it, it wasn't there. But life was a bitch and the strategy had proven to, in the end, bite him right back in the ass.
They would never become happy if he wasn't going to let Shusei speak.
So he bit his tongue and swallowed the words that were about to come out.
Shusei was looking back at him, silent as if he was waiting for Hotsuma to yell at him. When nothing happened, the surprise on the brunette's face wasn't lost to him.
Hotsuma waved his other hand at him.
"I'm listening." He grumbled. If that was what it took to help his partner to come out of his shell and beat his demons so be it. For once, he would keep his mouth shut and his temper in check.
The brunette took a deep breath as if to prepare himself for what he was about to say before he continued. The anticipation all but killed Hotsuma, his only hope was that Shusei would be quick about it since he certainly wasn't going to sit through it like this for a longer amount of time. Which practically came down to a couple of minutes. Max.
Shusei's eyes wandered away from his face and his gaze fell onto their hands on the table that were still enveloped in each other. His voice was so low that Hotsuma had to strain to be able to hear him.
"When I saw you that day with Yuki-kun… I was happy for you. He was able to free you. Something I couldn't do in all this time… The only thing I ever wanted was for you to need me. As long as you needed me, my life would have a purpose. I failed you, Hotsuma…"
His voice broke and with it, Hotsuma's heart. There were no words to describe the pain and sorrow, tears prickled in his eyes, stinging sharply. One rolled down his cheek but he didn't wipe it off. Instead he reached out with his other hand, trembling, and touched Shusei's face ever so gently. He stroked brunette strands of hair away from it so that he could see him. Then he put his fingers under his chin to lift his head.
Every fiber in him screamed and he fought hard with himself to not get up and around the table, grabbing Shusei at his collar in order to shake some sense into him. He clenched his jaw that it hurt but he managed to stay in his spot.
This was all his fault. He never had told Shusei how he felt about him. All this time, he had been too self-absorbed to notice the turmoil his partner had been in. How much must have had pained it Shusei that he hadn't been able to look at him without guilt. God, every time he had looked at him he had looked away almost instantly because he hadn't been able to endure the sight of the scars.
He had promised to never look away again but hearing those words from Shusei, he suddenly doubted that they had reached the brunette yet. Somehow, it dawned on him that he would need not only to say it over and over again but also to prove that he meant it. Well, he didn't have any problem with either one. He would say and prove it as many times as it would take to have Shusei believe it. He needed his friend like one needs air to breathe, he was the one thing he couldn't live without.
Guided by Hotsuma's fingers that were holding Shusei's chin, their eyes met. He tried a smile and it came out somewhat crooked but it was enough to chase away the dark shadows that were clouding Shusei's face. He felt his lover's fingertips on his cheek where the tear had rolled down, wiping away tenderly the last traces of the salty moisture.
"Hotsuma…" His name was a whisper.
Hotsuma let go of Shusei's chin and put his index finger on his friend's forehead.
"Not sure what's going on in there but I will make you stop believing in this kind of bullshit. You saved my life. Forget about Yuki, the only one I want to be with is YOU. I said it before and I am saying it again - there will never be anybody else but you. I…" He paused a second to get the actual words out. "I need you, Shusei."
As if to make a point he put a little bit more pressure into his touch, making Shusei's head move back a little.
"Get it? And now let's finish and go home before Tachibana-san sends this blonde idiot to look for us."
A smile appeared on Shusei's lips and Hotsuma mentally congratulated himself. Catastrophe avoided. He would take care of the rest when they got home.
Home. Suddenly, he couldn't wait to get there fast enough. At the same time, his chest tightened. He was going to make up for past mistakes and if it would take the rest of his life so be it. He knew that he couldn't make the past go away but he could make sure that Shusei never would feel this way again.
They finished their meal quickly. Well, Hotsuma ate most of Shusei's pancake but he saw to it that his partner ate some of it, too. He wasn't even unsuspicious of it but Shusei played along without complaints.
Their waiter came back, bowing politely.
"Go-chisō-sama deshita." Both, Hotsuma and Shusei, said in unison.
When Hotsuma asked about the check the waiter bowed profusely again, saying that a certain Shinmei-kun would take care of it.
"This bloody…" Shusei's hand on his arm stopped him mid-sentence.
"Arigatou gozaimasu." Shusei accepted politely, showing his best smile to the waiter who looked a bit uncomfortable. He shuffled away, leaving the zweilts to themselves.
"I could have paid that. I don't need that creep to pick up the bill." Hotsuma grumbled as they were making their way out of the restaurant, Shusei following closely. "And no way I'm gonna say thank you to that jerk either."
Next to him, Shusei couldn't quite suppress the giggle about Hotsuma's antics.
"Well, it wouldn't be polite to not thank him, don't you think? I'm sure he meant no harm." The brunette's hand slipped into his. "I will talk to him if you think you can't handle it." The hand squeezed his slightly. They were more or less the only ones on the street, except for a few of people that were wrapping up some last errands before they, too, would return to their homes. The night promised to be clear. The clouds from earlier had disappeared, leaving the sky in various shades of dark blue with a handful of stars scattered across the canopy.
Hotsuma huffed.
"Hmpf. I bet the prick would like that. Like hell I will let you talk to him. I can perfectly take care of it myself."
"Of course."
Shusei's tone suggested that he was enjoying himself immensely to his expense but for once, Hotsuma let it go. He knew Shusei well enough to know that it was a compliment, the teasing proof that he cared.
As a response, he squeezed back, pulling the brunette closer to his side. The thought to kiss him crossed his mind and before he could even realize it he acted upon it, turning his head slightly while grabbing Shusei's shoulder with his other hand to draw him in. It was just a chaste peck on the lips but it sent his heart racing nevertheless.
Shusei looked back at him with wide eyes that were shining with a mix of surprise and desire that knocked the breath right out of Hotsuma's lungs but before either of them could say anything a black limousine pulled over next to them. The driver's window came down and revealed one of Takashiro-san's drivers, the one that had driven them to the police station.
The guy looked a little bit uncomfortable, staring at a point somewhere behind them. Hotsuma assumed it was because he had interrupted them earlier in the car and now had just done it again. Talk about perfect timing.
"Tachibana-san sent me. Please get in the c…"
Hotsuma shot him a glare that shut him up almost instantly and the driver rolled up the window quickly. Still holding onto Shusei's hand he got to the door and opened it to let his partner get in first. The car sped up as soon as he had shut the door.
A nightlight above their heads dimly lit the backseat of the car, the outside noises dampened to a degree that they weren't barely audible anymore. The car was armor-cased, all of Takashiro-san's cars were, and the heaviness of the limousine made the ride very smooth.
Next to him, his brunette partner was curled up in the seat. Shusei's fingers were still intertwined with his, his head resting on his shoulder. Hotsuma could feel how it was getting heavier with every second, a good indicator that his friend was drifting into sleep.
Allowing himself to relax as well, wrapped up in the stealthy silence of the limousine, he thought that maybe it was a good thing that Tachibana-san had sent the car after all. Although he would have had loved to enjoy more time with Shusei alone, he acknowledged the fact that he was tired and needed the rest. These sessions at the police stations were usually very strenuous for the brunette. Very carefully, as not to wake him up, he wriggled free his hand, putting it around Shusei's frame. With some gentle force he coaxed the sleeping figure to lay down until his head came to a rest in his lap.
The very previous night, Hotsuma would have had never dreamt of doing this but now it seemed to him like the most natural thing to do, touching the soft hair and openly admiring the beauty of his partner when he was sleeping. Not that Shusei wasn't beautiful when he was awake but this was different. He looked so unguarded and innocent, almost angelic. For all Hotsuma knew, his partner probably was. How else was it possible that he had been putting up with his temper all this time?
His fingers gently combed through the brunette locks, his touch very light. He marveled how soft it was, a silky mass of chocolate brown spilling onto his thighs. Out of their own accord, his fingers left the hair to caress Shusei's cheek, all the time making sure that his touch was light as a feather as not to wake him. From his cheek, it was only a short distance further down to the curve of his neck that was exposed by the collar of his shirt.
He wondered what it would feel like if he put his lips there, tasting and licking the essence that was Shusei. How he would feel his heartbeat on his tongue, maybe even nipping tenderly at the skin that was so soft.
Air seemed to get scarce all of a sudden when a wave of burning desire crawled all over his skin, making his breath hitch in his throat. The heat that was pooling in his belly shot sparks up his spine and he barely suppressed a shudder.
To distract himself he looked outside the window. They were very close to the mansion now, it was only a matter of minutes now until they arrived. He looked down at his sleeping partner. Maybe he could convince the driver to do another tour around the block so that Shusei could rest a little longer.
That was when the driver's cellphone rang, a quiet beep accompanied by the buzzing sound of the phone's vibration alarm. The driver pushed a button on the steering wheel to answer the call. He spoke in a hushed voice as if not to disturb his passengers but Hotsuma could hear him just fine. The voice that came out of the headset sounded very much like Takashiro-san's.
"Yes, sir… Understood, sir… I will meet you shortly."
Well, so much for a little detour.
They passed the mansion's gates and soon after, the limo stopped in front of the entrance. The driver got out and opened the door for Hotsuma who was trying to wake up Shusei at least enough to make him move from his lap and get out of the car.
Shusei stirred, forehead crinkled from the disturbance, nuzzling his face deeper into Hotsuma's lap.
"Oh, come on, Shusei. Just a minute or so and you will be sleeping in your bed." Hotsuma gently nudged the brunette's shoulder but no response.
"Great." He muttered and scooted toward the door, slipping out underneath Shusei. He got out of the backseat. It was already completely dark. Had they spent that much time alone?
He turned around and stuck his head back into the limousine. Shusei was still out so he grabbed his shoulders and dragged him toward him.
"You gotta help a little here."
Finally, Shusei opened his eyes, mumbling something unintelligible but he got in a somewhat upright position. Hotsuma held on to his friend as he all but crawled out of the car. Shooting him a sleepy smile, Shusei heavily leaned into his shoulder. Hotsuma could feel his friend slip so he wrapped an arm around his waist to steady him.
He nodded to the driver once before they made their way inside.
The house was quiet and Hotsuma was thankful for that. The last thing he needed were nosey zweilts waiting for them. He only wanted to get Shusei to bed and lay down next to him.
They made it up the stairs without stumbling (much) and from there it was only a few feet to Shusei's and his room.
"Almost there." He whispered to his friend who was slipping both hands around his neck as a response.
"Mmmmh… sleepy…" His warm breath grazed Hotsuma's neck in a very sensitive spot and he had to stifle a groan. The slight chuckle that followed didn't help the situation either.
"Ticklish?" Shusei mumbled, his lips dangerously close to his skin now. The outlook of Shusei actually kissing him there sent a tingle down his spine and he shuddered, gripping the brunette tighter.
"Knew it." Shusei whispered huskily, arms tightening around Hotsuma's neck. Which only brought him even closer if this was even possible. Hotsuma suddenly found it hard to breathe as his heart was speeding up in his chest. He became overly aware of the slim body that was pressed against him, his hand was gripping the brunette below the waist and if he would let it slip a little further to the left he would get a good handful of Shusei's behind.
Not that he would mind but he decided to get inside their room first. He didn't want anybody to run into them.
He managed to keep his desires in check until he closed the door behind them, a very affectionate Shusei at his side. The rational part of his brain had vanished into a far corner of his mind by now, refusing to come back out. There was only enough left to process the facts - they had kissed earlier (more than once), Shusei's face was still buried in the side of his neck with his warm breath fanning over his skin while the length of his body was pressed up against him, they were alone in their room - and the prospect of where this could be leading sent his brain all but into overload.
To be honest, he hadn't thought about any further than kissing Shusei. Not in a practical sense at least. He knew the theory and what was supposed to happen and how but he had never envisioned it to become reality of some sort or another at all or so soon for that matter. Only now here they were and it hit like a ton of bricks in the chest. His palms became sweaty and he fought down the urge to simply push the brunette back against the wall to cover those lips with his.
Shusei's voice brought him back to focus. His lips were grazing his skin the slightest bit but it was enough to set off butterflies in Hotsuma's belly.
"Do you need help finding the bed?" The brunette asked teasingly, fingers caught in some strands of hair at the back of his neck. The gentle tug stirred other body parts to life, leaving him a little lightheaded from the sudden rush of blood. This time, he couldn't quite hold back the groan.
"Fuck." He muttered and then whatever was left of his self-control snapped. Not that it had been much to begin with but it had brought them all the way to their room at least. Suddenly, he figured that here, in the familiar darkness of their room, there was no need to hold back anymore.
With a growl he grabbed Shusei's shoulders, his body turning and pressing the older boy against the door in one fleeting move. He crushed his lips onto the brunette's and this time he didn't wait for Shusei to get accustomed. His tongue darted out, parting the other's lips, seeking out its counterpart to dance with. Somewhere in the back of his mind he registered how Shusei stiffened for the shortest moment and he hoped that he hadn't scared him but it was over before he could ponder about it any further Shusei relaxed and melted into their kiss.
Thoroughly, Hotsuma explored every corner of the brunette's mouth, savoring the unique taste that was Shusei while his hands traveled down his sides to the hem of his shirt, his body still trapped between him and the door. He pushed his hands underneath the fabric where the soft skin of his stomach was hidden and let his fingertips brush against it.
He almost lost it when Shusei bucked his hips against him and his arms tightened around his neck. Hotsuma's brain was working double shifts to process what was happening while he just kept kissing him as if his life depended on it. He knew he was being too rough probably the way he was slanting his lips across his and holding him in place but there was no way for him to reign in all the emotions that were rushing through him.
When he felt them sinking down to the floor he broke the kiss.
"Bed. Now." He breathed out, pulling the brunette with him.
Together they stumbled into Shusei's bedroom, Hotsuma was on him as soon as they entered the room, seeking out his mouth and walking him back to the bed until they fell on top of the sheets, Hotsuma's body covering Shusei's. He brought his hands up to either side of the brunette's head to prop himself up a little, not wanting to crush his lover.
Underneath him, Shusei was breathing heavily. Hotsuma could feel both their hearts hammering against each other even through the layers of their school uniforms. It was a chore but Hotsuma managed to slow down a bit, their kiss becoming deeper as a result.
Eventually, his lips trailed off, kissing their way down Shusei's jaw line and his neck. When Hotsuma found an especially sensitive spot Shusei arched against him.
"Hotsuma…" His name came out as a quiet moan. "Please…" Shusei tilted his head to the side to give him better access and he complied immediately, licking the tender flesh. He used his teeth next and gently bit down which draw another moan from the brunette, louder this time.
Shusei started clawing at his jacket.
"Clothes… in the way…" His lover sounded both impatient and desperate, his voice barely a whisper against the crook of his neck. Hotsuma pulled back a little to give Shusei some room to work. In a matter of seconds he was shed from his jacket, slender fingers unbuttoning his shirt in a frenzy right thereafter until the garment slid from his shoulders.
And then Shusei's hands were on his now bare chest. Hotsuma had to close his eyes, his touch was cool and light but underneath his fingertips his skin was burning. He was certain that his heart was about to give out any minute now, his hands balled to fists, clutching to the sheets desperately. One of Shusei's hands grazed over his nipple which made his hips jerk, the friction sent another jolt of pleasure all the way up his spine like surge of fire. The moan that escaped from his mouth didn't sound like anything he thought he was capable of making but then again this wasn't like anything he had ever dreamed of.
It was hot, it was sensual and it was absolutely mind-blowing. Beautifully so. It occurred to him that this was just the beginning, there was still more to come, they weren't even naked yet. This terrified and excited him all at the same time as he wriggled free of his shirt, discarding it to the floor.
He was kneeling between Shusei's thighs now, on all four, letting the older boy explore his chest until he couldn't take it anymore. Falling back on his heels, he captured Shusei's hands and brought each of them down to the side.
"I want to look at you." His voice was merely a rasp.
Shusei's head snapped up and their eyes met. Except for his ragged breathing, Hotsuma was very still. He knew that the brunette was afraid but he needed him, all of him. His heart was aching for Shusei, he wanted to touch him so badly but he wanted to do it without any fabric in the way.
He was trembling now, his hands still circling Shusei's wrists. Part of him wanted to simply rip the clothes off his body until there wasn't any barrier left but for once he reigned himself in, waiting for Shusei to give the signal.
Seconds ticked by tantalizingly slow and just when he thought that he had overstepped his boundaries, he watched as Shusei's gaze softened.
"Ok." The older boy relaxed underneath him and Hotsuma's shoulders sagged. The relief was overwhelming. He studied the beautiful face in front of him, the love and admiration he felt in this very moment threatening to crush him. This would be the death of him.
"Fuck."
The next moment, he sprang into action, all but pouncing on Shusei.
Their lips met and he poured everything he had into the kiss, willing the brunette to let him in. His teeth nipped Shusei's lower lip, pulling slightly until he felt his resolve. His hands pushed Shusei's jacket open and found the buttons of his shirt, his fingers too clumsy to undo them one by one. If he didn't get it open now and feel the brunette's soft skin on his fingertips he would go insane, he knew it. So he did the first best thing that came to mind, he tore the fabric apart, buttons went flying from the force. Ignoring the shocked gasp that came from Shusei he put his hands on his chest.
He swallowed the moan Shusei gave when their skin made contact, the sound made him brave and pushed the shirt together with the jacket further off, hands sliding across his chest to his shoulders. Shusei arched his back to help and before soon the clothes were discarded next to Hotsuma's shirt on the floor.
His mouth wandered away from the older boys lips down to his neck and then further to where the scar was. He hovered over the marred flesh briefly before planting a kiss on it.
Shusei whimpered, his hands coming around Hotsuma's back, his fingers clawing into his shoulder blades. Hotsuma hissed out from the sudden pain but didn't take his mouth off the scar. He wanted, no, he needed Shusei to understand that he wasn't going to look away ever again. These scars were the reason he was alive and he would cherish them as long as he lived.
His tongue drew a moist line across the scarred flesh, licking and nipping until he felt Shusei relax underneath him.
"Hotsuma, please…" came the long awaited plea, his lovers fingers ghosting over his back as if they were trying to memorize each and every muscle. They were weaving a web of heat that was seeping deep into his skin and burning him alive. When they reached the waistband of his pants, skimming the edge and then trying to sneak in, he instinctively rolled his hips against the brunette's. The friction was absolute bliss and he had to groan.
His cock was straining against the fly of his pants now so hard it was almost painful. When Shusei pushed his own hips back up in response he all but came. Desperately, he tried to regain part of his composure, he didn't want this to end before it had even begun.
He lifted himself up a little to escape while he let his mouth wander further down to one of Shusei's nipples. Gently, he took it in, rolling his tongue around it before he bit down carefully. He was instantly rewarded with a moan that sounded very un-shusei like. It was louder and darker than anything he had heard from him before but he decided right there that it was the most incredible sound he had ever heard, its vibe sending a shiver down his spine directly to his groin.
"Damned, Shusei." He smirked. He wanted to hear that sound again so he released the nipple to venture over to the other one. "I wanna hear that sound again." He whispered before he closed his mouth around it. This time he bit a smidge harder.
The brunette moaned his name, his hands wandering around his hips to the front of his pants. There, they clawed at his belt. In no time, the belt was open and then he heard the sound of the zipper. Before his brain had even a chance to catch up on what was going on, one of the hands sneaked in and touched him through the fabric of his shorts.
The jolt that shot up his spine had his head explode. His heart was beating at a thousand miles an hour and if he had made a sound he couldn't tell since the blood rush was deafening.
"You're not so bad yourself." Shusei's voice brought him out of it. His hand was still where it had been a few seconds ago but it wasn't moving. Hotsuma was acutely aware of the warmth of Shusei's hand on him.
He let his head fall into the crook of Shusei's neck, breathing heavily now. The hand was still down there and when it moved around him, squeezing him the tiniest bit through the fabric he couldn't hold back anymore.
"Fuck, yes." Hotsuma grated out.
"Mmmhhhh…" was Shusei's answer, his mouth first at his ear and then further down at his neck, a wet trail between the two spots. His other hand slipped underneath the waistband of his pant, pushing it over his ass. With a little of Hotsuma's help, they made quick work of his clothes and a minute later he was completely bare. They had changed positions, Hotsuma was on his knees with Shusei kneeling between his thighs.
He could only look down in complete awe at the crown of brunette hair that was moving all the way south.
"What… Shu-shusei… shit…" he mumbled incoherently when he felt his mouth on the tip of his cock. One hand gripped Shusei's shoulder tightly while the other buried itself in his lover's hair. He tried not to jerk forward and push all the way into Shusei's mouth even if this was the thing he wanted to do so desperately. Torturously slow, Shusei slid his lips around him, moving down and up again.
Fire, he was on fire and there would be only one thing that could put it out. Shusei's tongue slapped over his tip once, twice and then he couldn't take any more. As gently as possible, he pulled the brunette back, moaning of the sudden loss of contact.
Damn, he needed to get rid of these clothes. But the belt seemed to be glued to Shusei's pants and his fingers were too shaky to do the job. Growling, he nearly ripped the damn thing off. If he kept going like this, Shusei would need a new uniform tomorrow.
His lover seemed to sense his distress and came to his aide, removing the belt and opening the fly of his pants. In one fleeting move, Hotsuma pushed him back into the mattress and pulled down the pieces of clothes. They, as well, landed on the pile next to the bed.
They hadn't bothered with lights but the moon was shining through the window and cast a pale silver light onto the bed. Hotsuma took a moment to take in the display in front of him. It was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen, his lover sprawled out naked in front him.
Shusei was looking right back at him, his gaze holding the same intensity as his. It made his heart skip a beat and his breath got caught in his throat. The burning in those amber eyes was eating him alive, not in his wildest dreams had he thought that Shusei could look at him like this. But he actually did and it turned him on, incredibly so.
Hotsuma's eyes wandered across the Shusei's figure in front of him and finally lingered on his engorged member that was twitching in a nest of brunette hair. The urge to touch was overwhelming and he put forth his hand, encircling his length with his fingers. He marveled at how soft the skin was, almost like velvet. Tentatively, he squeezed gently, moving his hand up and then down again slowly.
The mewl that Shusei made in response let his eyes snap up at him. The sound went straight down to his groin, the jolt of pleasure rippling through his spine and all the way to the tip of his cock. If he groaned he didn't remember, the only thing he knew was that he desperately wanted to hear that sound again. He repeated the movement, a little harder this time, and he was rewarded with another moan. This time, it was loud and raw and he watched, absolutely fascinated, how Shusei closed his eyes and opened his mouth to let it out. His head fell to the side and he clenched his fists into the sheets.
Oh fuck.
He all but came from simply watching his lover to unravel in front of him. It was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen and the fact that he was the one doing that to him made him feel invincible. But he needed more, he needed all of him, he wanted to bury and loose himself in him and never let go.
"Shusei, I… " He tried to speak but failed. So he did the second best thing and bent down to seal his lover's lips with a keen kiss, letting his tongue deliberately explore the other's mouth. He held himself up with one arm while the other hand was still wrapped around Shusei's cock.
At some point, he felt Shusei's arms come around him and he lowered himself down, ever so careful as not to squish him underneath. He rolled on his back, taking Shusei with him so that he was on top, pressed up against him. Hotsuma took both hands to explore the brunette's back and then his fingers dipped into the crevasse between his buttocks to find the firm ring of muscle.
He ghosted around it with his fingertips, not wanting to breach it yet. Concentration and with it self-restraint was getting harder with the second though since Shusei had started to grind his hips against him and the friction was threatening to undo him any minute. Shit, he needed a lubricant of some sort and he needed it now or he was going to come all over Shusei's stomach.
Above him, Shusei suddenly stilled. He broke the kiss and looked down at him, eyes all dark and shining with lust. Without saying a word, he took one of Hotsuma's hands and brought it up to his mouth. He had slid down from him and was on his side next to him now.
Completely in awe, Hotsuma could only watch as Shusei took one finger after the other in his mouth, wetting them generously with his saliva before the guided the hand back down. Hotsuma groaned when his fingers touched the puckering hole. He rubbed the moisture in and then came back up for more. He repeated the procedure a few times until he felt he had gathered enough to work his way in. All the time, the anticipation was killing him, his body trembling with desire. Next to him, Shusei kept making those sounds each time he touched his entrance and it took him everything he had left not to simply take him on the spot.
Slowly, he pushed one finger in. He felt some resistance first and Shusei went rigid for a second in his arms. He withdrew only to start anew and this time, the finger slid in a bit. With each pull and push, his finger went in deeper until he had managed to put it in all the way. It was so tight that he was wondering how his cock would feel in there. The sole thought sent sparks down his spine and his member was straining painfully between them.
He let his fingertip make a tiny circle inside and Shusei cried out with pleasure, arching his back against him wantonly.
"Fucking christ, Shusei…" he breathed out, the words barely a low growl in his throat. Adding another finger, Shusei held onto him as if he was his lifeline, burying his face in chest and muffling another moan. Hotsuma's restraint was waning by the second but he managed to prepare the older boy meticulously.
Finally, he pulled out completely, sitting up. Not sure how to proceed, he stroked Shusei's hair and let his hands roam over the boy's chest down to where the thin line of brunette hair started. He wanted to look at him but he knew that the first time would cause less discomfort for his lover if he was going to enter from behind. All he wanted was to do it right. Under no circumstances did he want to cause him pain. There would be plenty of other opportunities where they could look at each other while at it.
Shusei was looking at him all the while, waiting patiently for him to make the next move.
Hotsuma dipped his head to peck the brunette on the lips.
"Get on all four for me, will you." He whispered against his mouth. Shusei complied at once and Hotsuma moved behind him, positioning himself. His hands grabbed his hips to hold him in place and he lowered his head, slapping his tongue generously across the dark pink ring of muscle.
In front of him, Shusei was begging now.
"Hotsuma, please…"
But he ignored the quiet pleas, he wanted it to be good and what he had been inpatient a few minutes ago he was now taking it deliberately slow. When Shusei's begging became more incoherent and he bucked his hips against him he straightened up, pulling the brunette closer to him.
While he was holding onto his hip with one hand he gripped his cock with the other and brought it up to Shusei's hole.
That was it. He took a deep breath and pushed the tip in, very slowly, the precum that was leaking out adding additional lubrication. Shusei drew out a long throaty moan that echoed through the bedroom, his back concave to allow Hotsuma better access. It was almost too much and he had to pause right there in order not to come.
"Please Hotsuma…" Shusei turned his head around, looking at him over his shoulder, eyes wild and wide open. Strands of hair were falling into his face and he simply looked beautiful, breathtakingly so. The sight knocked the air right out of his lungs and he fell forward, trembling, his chest pressed up against the older boy's back. Nuzzling Shusei's neck, he inhaled his scent, stalling further because he knew that once he was fully inside it would be over in a matter of minutes. If he lasted that long, that was.
"I can't… I won't… be long…" He managed to say before his ability to speak gave out. Further down, where they were connected he still was hovering only with the tip inside. God, he wanted to thrust so badly, the urge was all-consuming and so overwhelming, he was merely holding on to a thread.
In response, Shusei turned his head a little more until their lips connected and he hungrily devoured him, one hand reaching around his head, fingers tightly gripping strands of blond locks to keep him close. Between the kisses, Shusei breathed words of encouragement, nothing more than whispers in the dark but the words were ringing loud and clear in Hotsuma's ears.
"Please… I'm so close… Hotsuma…"
As if to prove his words, Shusei's hand that had just been buried in his hair left and took one of his hand, guiding it down along his abdomen to his hard cock, urging him to touch, to squeeze, to pump. Eagerly, Hotsuma complied and after a few strokes Shusei was moaning uncontrollably between shallow breaths.
"Oh God, Hotsuma, yes…"
He was indeed close as Hotsuma could feel how he was being sucked in. With a deep groan, he finally gave in and thrusted all the way in. The moaned in unison and Hotsuma felt as if he was on fire, the tightness of Shusei's anus gently squeezing him into submission.
Still working up and down Shusei's length, he pulled out and pushed back in, managing to hit a sensitive spot since Shusei cried out in pleasure.
"Yes, there!"
There was not much thought process left in his brain but it was enough for him to find a steady rhythm and hit that spot with each thrust as he was getting closer each second. Underneath him, Shusei bucked his hips back against him erratically all of a sudden and a moment later, his cock was twitching in his hands, cum spurting all over his hands. He wasn't sure if he was hearing his name, his own heartbeat roaring inside his head the moment the contractions of Shusei's climax sent him over the edge as well.
There was a jolt of immense pleasure shooting down his spine and he jerked his hips forward violently. Another jolt followed and the pleasure spiraled out of control, a huge ball of light exploding behind his inner eye and all he could do was to simply keep that movement of his hips up as he was riding wave after wave.
He had no idea how much time had passed but as he came to he was still on top of Shusei, their bodies sticky with sweat. His mind felt pleasantly blank and a deep satisfaction paired with pure happiness filled his heart.
Underneath him, Shusei moved a little. Hotsuma rolled to the side, pulling him with him and they settled in a tight embrace, Shusei's back firmly pressed to his chest. He was still inside of him, his cock had softened by now so he gently pulled out. They both gasped and he buried his face in Shusei's hair.
It was this exact moment, in the afterglow of their lovemaking, that he was able to utter the words he had been holding back for such a long time.
"I love you, Shusei." Now that he had said it he knew he was going to say it each and every day until the end of their lives. Because it was the truth. It always had been and it always would be.
The response came in a gentle squeeze of fingers around his arms.
"I love you, too, Hotsuma."