I Hired the Guys to Beat Up My Brother
Heero: You what?
Author: I'm getting revenge that's all.
WuFei: Injustice! That is dishonorable!
Treize: Oh, and you killed me, why then?
WuFei: That was a national emergency.
Treize: Sure.
Author: Break it up. Now on to business, I am Son-Relena,
although I'm considering changing it to Relena Ichijouji (sp?). Anyway,
you are going to beat my brother up. I'll pay you anything you want. (From
now on I'm SR.)
Duo: Sounds fair. I'm in.
Heero: Mission accepted.
WuFei: Why does he always say that?
Heero: Omae......
Quatre: I'll do it. I think I'd better lose my mind again
though.
Trowa: I'm in.
Zechs: Umm, this not a good idea, but okay.
Treize: Anything I want?
SR: Yep.
Treize: You may depend on me.
WuFei: Must I do it too?
SR: If you don't, you'll see what's it's like to say everything
you think.
WuFei: Injustice! Count me in. *sulkly turns around*
SR: One more thing, Justice Boy! If you say on more word
about justice, I'm gonna tell everyone about what you daydream about.
WuFei: *angrily turns around and glares*
Duo: Can we have our wishes first?
SR: If you want. Duo, you first.
Duo: I want 8 tons of candy and 9 tons of assorted sugars.
SR: Alright, it's at your house. Treize?
Treize: I want Lady Une split into two people.
Duo: Cool, can I borrow the dangerous one sometime?
SR: Your wish is my command, your Excellency. Quatre?
Quatre: *leans over and whispers*
SR: *amused* Trowa?
Trowa: Power weapons and ammunition.
SR: *starts laughing*
Trowa: What's so funny?
Quatre: *whispers to him*
Heero: *over heard*
T&H: * burst out laughing*
Duo: What the heck is so funny?
SR&T&H&Q: *laugh harder than ever*
WuFei: *had also overheard, but of course didn't laugh*
Quatre and Trowa asked for the same thing.
Duo: *laughs*
Ten minutes later
SR: WuFei, what would you like?
WuFei: Why do you always pay us to do stuff?
SR: That way I keep on everybody's good side except yours.
WuFei: Whatever. I want you to kill Sally Po.
SR: Yo, 'Thou shalt not murder'.
WuFei: Fine. Lock her up and give me the key.
SR: Done. That just leaves Heero and Zechs. Heero?
Heero: Lock Relena with Sally and never ever write a a
yaoi fic.
SR: Okay, but if you think I'd write yaoi, you are crazy.
It goes against hormones.
Zechs: I want the Galatic Layline.
SR: I gave you that in We're Cornering the Gundam Boys.
Zechs: So?
SR: Although I enjoyed riding with Matt from Digimon
up in space; that takes too darn long and you already have it!
Zechs: Then I want to make Relenee a perfect soldier with
emotions showing partially.
SR: I can do that, but may I ask why?
Zechs: Everyone makes fun of her.
SR: Now Duo will be in charge. You will attack this kid.
*holds up picture of her brother, Brian*
Duo: He looks little enough.
SR: He's over eleven. He's more annoying than Duo somtimes.
WuFei: That is immpossible.
Duo: I resent that, Wu-maaaa....
Heero: *grabs Duo's mouth* Shut up!
Trowa: What do propose we do?
SR: Easy. Talk him into a MS battle, a shoot out,
a sword fight, a pokemon battle, a magic powers showdown, a bungee jumping
contest and finally a single combat. Questions?
Quatre: What MS's did you have in mind?
SR: I rebuilt the Gundam Sandrock, complete with Zero
system. Plus, I made him a Mercrius modified.
Duo: Which pokemon?
SR: Up to you.
Trowa: What magic?
SR: Uhhh, how 'bout telekinesis?
Trowa: Sure.
SR: Okay then, here we are. *waved author wand all are
standing in a huge arena* WuFei, to the dueling section. Trowa magic. Quatre
MS. Zechs bungee jumping. Treize shoot out. Heero combat area. Duo pokemon.
All: Yes ma'am.
SR: *waves wand* Oh, Brian, bet ya can't beat my friends.
Brian: Of course I can.
SR: Alright. Pick your pokemon.
Brian: I choose a level 100 Machamp.
SR: Duo?
Brian: You mean you got the Gundam Boys for a team?
SR: Yeah, so.
Brian: Oh nothing. *gulps*
Duo: Ready. Go Nidoqueen.
Brian: You've got to be kidding. Go Machamp!
This round is of course over in 30 seconds. Brian wins.
SR: You won't be so lucky on the shoot out with Treize.
Pick a weapon.
Brian: 44 magnum.
SR: Begin.
Treize: *fires his hunting shotgun*
Brian: *falls down*
Treize: *walks over to target* We all must lose sometimes.
Brian: *springs up and shoots Treize in the head* Righto!
Treize:X_X
SR: Okay so you won twice. Bungee jumping is next, with
Zechs.
Zechs: You first.
Brian: *comes out from behind him and jumps*
Zechs: *jumps and cord snapps, he falls into a rushing
river*
SR: Dang it! I hope Trowa does better.
Brian: What's his category?
SR: Magic powers. Pick a power.
Brian: Teleportation.
Trowa: Let's go.
Brian: *goes into fast mode*
Trowa: *confused*
Brian: *still in fast mode*
Trowa: This is tough, but 'one must never give up til
the end'.
Brian: Which is now. *appears behind Trowa and karate
chops his neck*
Trowa: *falls over*
Brian: These guys are better on tv. Man does my hand hurt
though.
SR: I'm supposed to be winning here. Next time I will
call on Tenchi and company.
Brian: WuFei's up.
WuFei: I will destroy the enemy!
SR: That's the spirit!
WuFei: *rushes the kid*
Brian: *kicks him below the belt*
WuFei: *collapses* Vile fiend.
Brian: Whatever you say.
SR: What the heck gosh dang thing is wrong with these
jerks?
Quatre: Let me at him!
Brian: Let's get it on.
