So, let's just say Nick and Jess DID NOT have an "amicable" break up. I took a few liberties but I really hope you like it!
Sincerely,
Your NG Secret Santa!
Me and you together
Three months had passed since they had talked last. They'd made the effort and effectively avoided each other. She worked days and he was gone by the time she walked in the door. She took the elevator and he ran the stairs.
It worked. Until today.
She was there the moment he walked into the kitchen to grab a bowl of cereal.
"Jesus Jess!" he said when the cold milk flicked him in the face. He let out an uncomfortable laugh. "You scared me."
Jess grimaced. "Sorry. Wasn't my intention."
They stood in front of the fridge silent. It got uncomfortable fast.
"So, uh," He motioned to the table. "I'm just gonna- Yeah." He consciously made a wide berth around her. Intentionally avoiding touching her or even grazing her arm.
"Yeah, yeah sorry." She turned to the table and sat down before he did. He started shoveling cereal into his mouth while keeping his gaze down. He could feel her eyes bore into him. He could hear her voice in his head, calling his name. He ate faster because he just wanted to go to bed.
He finished his bowl and brought the bowl to his lips. He drank the milk and set it down. And as he looked up, he met Jess' eyes. They were staring directly at him.
He wanted to look away but her eyes just stared. He loved her eyes. They were so expressive and blue. They didn't lie. They got her in trouble but most of the time, they got what they wanted. He knew too well.
The scrape of his chair made her flinch. He stood up and walked to the sink ignoring that feeling in his chest. Her eyes never left his back. He felt them as he started washing his bowl. He felt them when he grabbed a cloth to dry his hands. He even felt them as he walked away. He had to ignore her. He could ignore her.
She was persistent. She stood up when he crossed the hallway to his door.
"Nick?" She said quietly. "Can you talk to me? Please." She quietly followed him until he stopped and stood in front of his door. She stopped a few feet from him. Doorknob in his hand ready to go in and pass out. He could hear the pleading in her voice. She tried to hide it but it was there. Just like that day.
"I need my friend. I miss my friend. Please. Just be my friend."
He sighed. He wasn't mad. He just wanted to sleep.
"Not right now Jess." He didn't turn around. "Later."
He could hear her sniffle but he still didn't turn around.
"Nick." Her voice was closer like she was standing right behind him. "Just a few minutes, please." If he turned around, he was sure she'd be right there. Her body heat radiating straight into him. Don't turn around he pleaded to himself. Though, something she said caught his attention.
She kept saying please. Why? She was acting strange. But then again, he didn't know much about her now.
"Jess," He sighed out. Her name was no longer something he wanted to say. It thickened up his tongue. It was foreign and unnatural. It wasn't about love anymore. But it was lie, he loved her. So much. and she didn't. Not anymore.
"Nick." Was all she answered back.
"I'm tired. Later." He opened his door and was ready to slam it shut but her hand went managed to stop it.
"No Nick. Now." Her tone was getting angrier. He could feel himself start to get angry too. She had no right. She wasn't allowed to have this effect on him.
His head hung from all stress he was holding onto. "Jess," Again with her name. "Why now?" He spoke into his chest. Don't turn around.
She inhaled slowly. "I need to tell you something. It's important." All the air left her lungs.
Nick shrugged. "Ok. So, tell me."
"You have to turn around. I'm not telling your back."
Nick rolled his eyes. "I'm good thanks."
"Turn around."
"No."
"Nick. Turn around."
"No." He said stubbornly. His head went back up as he said it.
"Fine. Nick. I've been-" she stopped talking. The front door had swung open and she could hear Winston talking to someone. Nick turned around suddenly bumping right into her. Her perfume instantly overpowered his senses. Her eyes were wide open and peered right into his. They looked at each other for a moment before he took a step back. It was useless. She was all in his senses and mind. She was everywhere.
Winston was rounding the corner and they still hadn't budged. "I'm tellin' you! Those burritos from that stand are to die for! We HAVE to go again right? Everyone has to! We all- what's going on here?"
He stopped talking at the site of them standing in front of each other. In Nick's room. He walked closer to them while holding Furguson in his arms.
"Hey guys. Uh, everything ok?"
Nick quickly nodded. "Yes! We were just-"
"I owe him money!" Jess quipped.
Winston furrowed his eyebrows. "Money?" He said. Uncertainty laced his question. "For what?"
Nick and Jess gave each other a look. "Uh," started Jess. "He loaned me some money for some-"
"Knitting needles!" Nick blurted out.
Jess nodded. "Yeah, Yeah! I-I've been knitting and worn mine to the nubs!"
Nick grimaced and sighed. "Yeah, well all that frustration has to go somewhere. Right Jess?"
She furrowed. "Well yeah Nick! I mean, I know I'll be nice and toasty with my blanket! Not a mean old frosty turtle faced guy in this cold, cold room. Right Nick?"
She gave him a forced smile. Nick shook his head.
"Oook, you guys are acting really weird." Winston said. "Anyway, Furguson and I were just talking about getting some dinner. Care to join?"
Furguson let a disgruntled meow. "Furguson! Your brother and sister think you're being rude! They're hungry too!"
Nick and Jess frowned. Furguson meowed louder and hissed. Winston let him go and he quickly scampered to the living room, leaving the three behind.
Winston shrugged. "Oh, well. I guess it'll be just the three of us." Winston said brightly. "So, where do you guys want to go?"
00
Jess moved her fork around the plate as if she were eating. Nothing was good where Winston had finally decided to eat. A restaurant that served food shaped into states. It sounded good but the choices were bizarre. She didn't even know what she ordered but it was in the shape of New York. She had been hoping pizza but it was too burnt to tell. Winston had ordered from Texas and Nick from Ohio. But they all looked the same.
She took a few bites and listened to them talk. They were talking about some movie they wanted to see. It was hard. Being around Nick was so difficult. He avoided her. But, so did she. It just happened. He started working more nights. She stayed after school taking charge of a book club. She'd get home later and he'd be gone. It was hard but easier to just be away.
The first few days, she wanted to talk to him. Let him know that she was still going to be there. He didn't open the door when she knocked. He didn't come near her room. Even though it was right across from hers.
So, she gave up. It was better for them to move on.
But.
Then she noticed something.
And she had to tell him.
Now.
Winston laughing brought her back. Nick smiled but it didn't reach his eyes. She dragged the fork across her plate again. Winston noticed her demeanor.
"You ok Jess?"
Jess gave him a forced smile. "Mhmm. Just finishing up."
Nick looked directly at his plate avoiding her eyes.
"Great!" Winston responded. "Well, I'm stuffed! I don't know about you guys but this man-" He pointed his thumbs at his chest. "-is ready to pass out!"
Nick nodded. "Uh, me too. Let's pay and go? Jess?"
She bobbed her head. "Yeah, yeah. Let me just-" She picked up her clutch. "Split it?" She fished out some bills. Before Nick could respond, Winston shook his head. "Naw guys! My treat!" He stood up without another word and made his way to the cashier leaving them at the table.
They sat in an awkward silence. Jess made a big deal of putting her money back while Nick looked up at the ceiling. The last time they'd had a meal together was the day they'd broken up. So. Very. Awkward.
Winston was taking too long. Jess was pretending to be very interested in her clutch. Nick squinted as he looked at the ceiling.
"Huh." He grunted.
Unintentionally she answered without looking up. "Yeah?" and froze. She stopped rummaging around her tiny purse. Nick looked down at her. Her eyes weren't looking at him. They were looking up at the ceiling.
Thank God.
But was there. Always. No matter how much time had passed. She was embedded just as he was into each other.
Seconds passed.
Nick cleared his throat. "Just the tiles are uneven."
"Oh." Was all she answered.
"Um, they're crooked. Shoddy job."
"Ok. I guess." She looked down at her feet without meeting his eyes.
Awkwardness filled the table again.
Winston suddenly appeared. "Guess who got a number?!"
He was so excited. Nick shrugged. "Took you long enough."
Winston squinted at him. "The art of seduction is art Nick! I'm not just gonna run up to her and beg. Am I?"
"Is that how you got a number?"
"Yeah." He quickly answered. "It took forever!"
Jess stood up. "I gotta go. I'm tired." She made her way around them. "I'll see you guys at home." She walked quickly out of the restaurant.
Nick watched her go. Winston sighed.
"Damn. You really need to go after her."
Nick furrowed his eyebrows. "It's been a months. We've been over too long. She doesn't love me anyways."
Winston scoffed. "You're an idiot you know? She clearly does. I swear, she's been pinning since that day man! You're just this mopey idiot that's chosen to ignore it!"
Nick huffed. "Winston. She told me that herself! She said we were better as friends! Nothing is going to change her mind!"
"That baby might!" Winston's eye went huge as he blurted that out. "I mean-"
Nick stared at Winston. "Baby?" Nick asked. "What baby?"
"Baby? Did I say baby? I meant Mabey! A friend that has that name. Yes! Exactly her. You know funny story-"
"WINSTON!" Nick shouted. "What. Baby?!"
Winston sighed loudly. "Me and my damn mouth. Fine. Jess' pregnant"
00
The walk was good for her. She wasn't lying about being tired. She was exhausted. The loft wasn't too far and she needed time to think.
She was pregnant.
No use denying it anymore. She was going to have Nick Miller's baby. And desperately wanted to tell him but he was avoiding her. She'd known a couple of weeks now. Every time she'd try, he'd disappear. No matter the time or day. He was never around.
She sighed. She'd run into him by chance today. She'd purposely taken the day off for a doctor's appointment and to tell him. She was too far along to continue hiding it and Winston had somehow figured it out. Probably her running to the bathroom multiple times a day had tipped him off. He promised not to say anything to anyone. He did tell her that Nick deserved to know. Especially if, no, not if. Especially because she still loved him.
She sighed again. If she couldn't tell him, she'd just move out and raise the baby on her own. Nick didn't want anything to do with her.
Cece didn't know yet because she was too busy with her own pregnancy and honestly, she didn't want to bother her. Cece was almost due and she needed rest until the baby was born. Jess would deal on her own.
She entered her building to her elevator.
It was a good idea, right? Nick hated her and she would give him peace. He was running away from her.
That was, until he was running towards her yelling her name.
"JESS! WAIT!"
00
Nick ran.
Winston didn't even bother going after him. He opened his mouth after promising Jess he wouldn't. Damn. Oh well. Nick needed to know anyways.
Jess was pregnant.
Good for them. Idiots. Seriously, why did he have to do everything? He told them to keep trying. He convinced Jess who she loved when Nick thought he loved Reagan. Ugh. That phase.
And now. They were having a baby.
Idiots.
00
Nick ran.
Jess was pregnant. They were having a baby. God, he was an idiot. No wonder Jess kept trying to talk to him. He'd brush her off every time.
Nick needed Jess to know he was going to be there for them. It matter that she didn't love him. He was going to love that baby with all his heart. He remembers telling her that when she was freaking out that she was too old to have kids.
They could be 60 and have a baby. He didn't care. It was their baby. And he loved her.
He could see her opening the door to their building.
"JESS! WAIT!"
He stopped a few feet in front of her. She had a scared look on her face. A rabbit ready to hop away. He cautiously approached her.
"Jess," he wanted to hug her and tell her that he was here. Whatever she wanted to do. "I know-"
Jess let the door go. "Know what Nick? You've been avoiding me-" She was annoyed.
"I know you're pregnant."
Jess froze. "How?"
Nick shook his head. "Doesn't matter. What are you going to do?"
Jess sighed. "I'm keeping it. With or without you."
Nick furrowed his eyebrows. "That's not fair Jess."
"Not fair? Nick. Do you know how long I've been trying to tell you? Every time I tried you'd run away. I tried so hard Nick. You made it this way."
Nick sighed. "I'm sorry Jess! I-I did because, do you know how hard it was to be around you? I couldn't kiss you or hug you! I couldn't stand to be close to you because I still love you Jess. And you don't."
His words struck her. "I don't love you?"
He shook his head. "No. but I'm here. For the both of you. No matter what."
She smiled and he frowned. "You know you don't have to laugh at me. I get it-"
She ran to him and kissed him. He kissed her back without really thinking about it.
"No, you dummy. I love you too."
Nick smiled while kissing her.
"We're both idiots, right?"
Jess laughed. "Yeah, but we'll be idiots together."
OMG i took forever to finish but I have a cold i've been fighting all week. Merry Christmas Cosmictrap! (There may be a part 2. Maybe after I'm done feeling like crap.)