The Divorcee

BPOV:

After 5 years of marriage it was over. 5 years and one sweet little boy later, my marriage had dissolved. I changed my last name back to Swan, completely ready to erase any traces of him.

I had married Mike Newton about a year into college, we both attended to University of Seattle. I guess you could say we fell in love with each other while we were there.

But martial bliss only lasts so long. We had both finished college by the time he finally got the balls to ask me to marry him. And we wed in a little ceremony a few months later. And then a few months after that my little bundle of joy came along. Jacob Ryan Newton. After we fought about it for months I came up with the name, paying homage to my deceased best friend Jacob Black.

I guess the martial bliss ended when I found out I was pregnant. It was an accident. Honestly, I didn't want to be a mom. Atleast not then. And Mike certainly didn't want to be dad, he made that quite clear on our honeymoon. Which was to Disney Land. In California. Normal people go far away from home, but not Mike Newton.

Little Jake was born in September, the day after my birthday. He was quite the birthday present. My maternal instincts kicked in and I was instantly in love with the little boy.

Mike's paternal instincts never kicked in. I spent most of the time with the baby, doing whatever was needed to be done. I think Mike probably changed 10 diapers in Jake's entire life.

I made sure as soon as Jake was born to get back on the pill, I wasn't going to subject another child to living with Mike. It was quite obvious Mike didn't want Jake. Or me for that matter.

We suffered together for 4 long years after Jake was born. Until that fateful night. The night before Jake's birthday. My birthday. I told Mike I wanted a divorce and that I planned on moving out the day after Jake's 4th birthday.

And well, Mike didn't take it so well. A fight ensued, and I packed myself and Jake up and left that night already. And I left with a black eye and broken wrist. In the 7ish years we had been together Mike never hit me once, or talked down to me. Until that night. He lost it when I said I was leaving and moving back to Forks.

So I bundled Jake up in the middle of the night, took everything I could carry in my good hand and never looked back. I drove straight to my dad's house. And needless to say, the Chief was not happy when he only daughter pulled up to the house with a black eye telling him that she left her husband.

It was beginning of the end. Mike called repeatedly and apologized or hitting me, begging for me to come home. But it was over, I knew it. There was no going back.

And now here I am, almost a year to date since I left. I went and signed the divorce papers in Seattle that morning. And Mike signed over any and all rights he had to Jake. It just proved to me once more that Mike never wanted to be a dad.

Mike's attorney looked at me in the office and began to talk. "So Ms. Newton, you stated on the divorce paper your differences were irreconcilable. Do you still believe that?" he asked.

I nodded. "Yes. There is no getting back together with him." I replied bitterly.

The look on Mike's face was worth the entire trip. I was still bitter with him for hitting me. While my son was in the same house. And that he gave up Jake like he was a bad habit.

It hurt. Watching the man I fell in love with sign the papers to dissolve out marriage completely. And giving up all rights to his only son.

My attorney was the one to talk this time. "Michael you know that by signing this paper you are giving up all of your rights to Jacob Ryan Newton. You will no longer be allowed to see him, speak to him, and if Bella decides to change his last name to something else like her maiden name you are not allowed to object. You understand all of this?" he asked.

Mike nodded his head in agreement. "I understand. I didn't want Jake anyways. And Jake was stupid name. All because that one Indian guy died a couple years ago." he mumbled as he signed.

My hand immediately clenched into fists. I couldn't believe he was so insensitive. Not only did he insult my son, but insulted my best friend. "I cant believe you Mike. When did you turn into such an asshole?" I asked.

"When you decided to get pregnant with a kid I never wanted."

"I cant help that I didn't know antibiotics affect the way birth control works! How was I supposed to know?"

"Isn't that what they have abortion clinics for Isabella?" he asked, taunting me.

"Didn't your parents ever teach you not to hit women? How is that probation going for you Mike?" I countered.

Our attorneys stepped in, stopping our banter before it turned into anything worse. I signed off on all the proper papers.

My name went back to Isabella Swan. I changed Jake's name to Swan. I was ready to remove any and all traces of Michael Newton from my life. I never wanted to see him again if I had too.

"I hope to be seeing you around sometime soon Bella." Mike challenged.

"That's what I have a restraining order for Mike. Come within 100 yards of me and you know the Chief will throw your ass in jail all over again." I said, flipping him the bird as I walked out to my car.

When I got into my car I lost it. I cried my eyes out. How could someone be okay with beating their wife of 5 years and then be willing to lose all rights to the child he created in one day? I just didn't get it. I had no problem with my wanting to get rid of me, but how Mike could want no contact to the beautiful son he helped make was beyond me.

I pulled the picture I had of little Jake from my wallet, seeing his adorable little almost 5 year old face immediately gave me my reason to live again. That boy was the reason I was going to keep going on. No matter how bad things got, that little boy needed me. My tears dried almost instantly, I knew I had to go pick him up from Sue's house by nightfall. The kid started soccer in the morning, and he was beyond excited. He reminded me like 8 times before I left for Seattle.

I began the 3 and a half hour drive home, the weight of the world off of my shoulders now that I was officially divorced. And I had incentive to get home, I could cry myself to sleep all I wanted when Jake went to bed. I just knew I had to be awake and functioning in time for soccer. And a soccer game gave me time to think about how I felt about being alone forever. No one would want me, I wouldn't fall in love or get married again in my lifetime.

EPOV:

Once I finished high school I headed back home to Chicago, where I had originally grown up before moving to Forks. I went to school to be a pediatrician, just like I had planned on. I fell in love with an old family friend that lived in Chicago.

Her name is Tanya Denali. I had the biggest crush on her when we were kids. And then I moved to Forks and forgot about her until we met at a bar one night.

But to say my relationship with Tanya was unconventional was an understatement. We did things in the completely wrong way. We fell in love way to fast for it to last.

And about 6 months into our relationship Tanya came to me and told me she was pregnant with my child. My child. I had always wanted kids growing up, but I had figured I would wait until I was done with school. And be married. You know, the traditional way of doing things.

But 9 months later I had a little bouncing baby girl that we named Emmalie Esme Cullen. We knew we weren't ready to be parents, this was all happening way to fast. And I wanted to marry Tanya. But not for the right reasons.

I wanted to marry her because we had a child together, and I believed that to have children you had to be married and in love. We were the farthest thing from being ready to get married. And even farther from being parents.

But life doesn't seem to always work out the way its supposed to, and here we were unwed parents with a baby we didn't know how to take care of.

When Emmalie was 3 months old I decided Tanya and I had to get married, that way Tanya could share my last name with her daughter. I didn't really give her much of an option to marry me, I could be pretty convincing when I wanted to be.

So we tied the knot, at the courthouse with a justice of the peace. Tanya wasn't exactly ready to shout from the roof tops that she married me. She didn't want this life. She didn't want to be tied down with a husband and baby at the age of 21.

And she was very vocal about it, we spent night after night arguing about how life was supposed to be. How we wanted it to be.

Emmalie was 6 months old when Tanya came to me asking for a seperation. And I welcoming gave in. We weren't getting along at all, we were constantly fighting with each other. I worked a lot, and she hated it because she didn't want to take care of Emmalie by herself. I thought she should be more involved with raising Emmalie, she didn't agree. Mostly because she didn't want a child of her own right now.

She wanted to be the typical 21 year old, going out and partying on the weekends. But you can't do that with a baby around, she needed to be at home taking care of the baby we made instead of partying.

I on the other hand would have much rather spent time with Emmalie when I wasn't working, and I did. Whenever I didn't have to work I was playing with her, taking her out places. I was being the father I wanted to be. Tanya didn't work, so she got to spend all day long with her. I didn't. I missed a lot.

I couldn't take the constant arguing anymore so I told her it was okay to be separated. And before I could ask about who was keeping Emmalie, she decided I was going to be the one who kept her. And that she would call if she wanted to see the baby.

Tanya moved out the next day, I took a few days off of work to wrap my head around things and spend time with my daughter. I think that's when I realized that things were really over with Tanya, that there was no going back.

In the first week Tanya left, she never called to see Emmalie once. And it bothered me and that a mother could not care about the baby they helped create and nutured. 2 weeks went by, no phone call wanting to see the baby.

3 weeks.

A month.

A month and a half.

That's when I decided to pick up the phone. And she had been in the middle of having sex with a random man.

And that's when I decided that we were getting a divorce. And she had the balls to protest! To tell me she still loved me but couldn't take being a mom. She told me we should give Emmalie up for adoption so we could get back together.

I was stunned into silence.

Once I got my bearings back I was ready to reply. "No Tanya. After you said those words it solidified the fact that were over. We're getting divorced. And I don't ever want to see you again. And I don't ever want you to see Emmalie again. You'll be getting divorce papers in the mail as soon as I see the lawyer." I said, hanging up just as she was getting ready to object.

I saw the lawyer the next day, drawing up divorce papers and papers for Tanya to give up the rights to Emmalie. I made the plans to move back to Forks. In with my parents again, I needed help taking care of the baby as a single dad if I ever wanted to continue in the pediatrics department at the Forks hospital.

The fateful day came, we were signing the divorce papers the same day I was getting ready to leave to move back to Forks. And I had nothing to say to Tanya. When my lawyer started to ask Tanya if our differences could be reconciled I rolled my eyes.

"Well I seem to think our differences could be fixed if we gave up that stupid baby for adoption." she replied.

My ears flamed bright red, I couldn't believe how she talked about our baby girl. "And that is the biggest reason Im divorcing you! You seem to think our problems are because of the baby! Our problems have nothing to do with her! Its all because you're a dumb bitch who cant think of anything else but yourself!" I exploded loudly.

The lawyers interjected quickly, going over what else was in the papers. "Tanya, Edward has drawn up papers for you to relinquish your rights to Emmalie Cullen. Are you prepared to do that?" my lawyer asked.

Tanya nodded quickly. "Yes please. I didn't want her in the first place. I should have aborted her while I had the option. If I did that we wouldn't be in this problem. So hand those papers over!" she cheered.

"I cant believe that you think we would be okay if Emmalie hadn't been born. We wouldn't be together either way!" I steamed as I signed the divorce papers and then the other papers.

Once the meeting was over I headed straight to the babysitter to collect Emmalie, and then we were catching a flight right to Port Angeles. My parents were going to pick us up at the airport.

And that was the beginning of a new life. I had a lot of time to think while we flew. And I thought I would be alone for the rest of my life, just me and little Emmalie until she grew up and decided to get married. I felt like I would never find another person that would love me, find another person to get married to. I was skeptical, torn, broken, shattered, no one would want to deal with my baggage.