Note: My first Avatar fic! Oh I wasn't sure if Sokka calls his mom, mom or mother so I kinda went with both. And finally I'm 15! I had my Quince over the weekend. Well read and review!
Through A Warrior's Eyes
I don't care that my Mom's dead. No, I don't care that she was killed a few days after I became fourteen. She didn't matter to me at all. Or at least that's what Katara thinks.
But you see, she just doesn't understand. Dad always told me that crying is weak. Saying I care is showing softness, and soft is weak. And I'm a warrior and as a warrior I need strength the way I need food. It keeps me alive.
However, when I'm alone, memories always flood back to me, usually in the form of nightmares. And I don't cry, but that doesn't mean I don't feel.
Because I loved my mom. I really loved her. She was an amazing woman, one of a kind. She was as tough as any man, yet as gentle and caring as any woman. She could love her son and daughter to death, and provide them with food and warmth. Yet she could also fight for them.
Fight… for me…
And she always knew just what to say. Like when I was younger and I used to claim I'd become the greatest warrior of the South Pole. I can recall laughter always following this claim, but it was not my own.Because everyone figured I was way too scrawny to be even half the warrior my uncle was (and he couldn't even hit a target that stood only five feet from him).
Humbled by the insults and shamed by my size, I would always hide. However, my Mother had a knack for finding me. She would always take me back home and would tell me the things she knew would make me smile.
Why she had to die I do not know, not that I'd wish it on any one else though…
As I recall, she was the only one who believed in me. She was all that helped me up when I fell, and all that kept me going when I said I could not.
For Dad was at war. And so were all the other boys older than I. No other woman truly believed I could ever be physically strong enough to protect anyone. My village, my family…
My Mom… my sweet, sweet Mom…
The day I turned fourteen my Mom cried. 'Your getting so big' she had told me and a few tears ran down her brown cheeks. She admitted to being afraid because she didn't wish to lose me. Because once I became eighteen years I had to go to war. I would fight besides my father…I might die.
'If I die, I died fighting for you and Katara!' I'd told her, confidence in my still unmatured voice.
Smiling through her tears, my Mother pulled me into a loving embrace. 'Oh Sokka, I'm not ready to let you go into the harsh world. How I wish you were little again. I want you to be my little boy forever. Once you turn eighteen I can't protect you anymore, but I wish I could till the day I die.'
If only she knew she'd get her wish…
That fateful day of the Fire Nation raid everything felt wrong. Something…maybe it was in the air… something just didn't feel right.
Katara and I had just gotten back from fishing for the entire village when it happened. They came without warning. They just ran in shouting, throwing flames that fried the fish andburned our homes.
'Sokka, Katara, run!' Our Mother yelled and we did. Grabbing my younger sister's covered hand I led her to our secret hiding place. I ordered her to stay and I ran out.
'Sokka!' She'd yelled after me.
'I have to save Mom!' I'd yelled back and continued running. However, I froze once I was within yards of my tribe. Slowly my eyes had widened at the chaos I now held within my gaze. Flames danced upon the tops of our homes and erupted from the fists of Fire Nation soldiers as they chased defenseless woman and children. And several screams rose in the air, some ending with the sizzling of fire.
It was just than that I thought I heard the scream of my Mother. Without thinking I ran strait into the chaos, my boomerang in my right hand. Fire benders were everywhere, stealing the food and money we'd been saving up, thejewelery it'd taken so long to make… It angered me, but I had no time for them.
'Mom!' I'd yelled.
'Sokka? Sokka, what're you doing here!' I heard my Mom's voice and turning, I saw her running up to me.
'Mom, c'mon we gotta…' I allowed my voice to trail off as my blue eyes widened. A fire-bender stood behind my Mother, his sword raised as he readied to behead her. Immediately, I stuck my boomerang in the path of the sword, catching it just in time.
Gasping, my Mother moved away from her attacker who brought up his sword again. This time though, I wasn't quick enough and he was able to slice me across the chest. Though wounded, I thought of nothing more than rescuing my Mother. So I continued on, being able to block every time he attempted to strike. Confidence rose within me, but than I made a mistake I will never forget.
I brought up my boomerang so I may hit him on the side of the head and render him unconscious. However, before my weapon could make contact with my attacker, he- using his sword -knocked the boomerang from my hands.
Completely defenseless, I just slowly backed off, my eyes opened as wide as I could get them. Smiling menacingly, my opponent brought his sword up in a way that when brought down it would go right through my chest. And I guess I could've moved, I could've. But I was just too scared, because I knew I was going to die.
Just than the fire-bender brought down the sword and suddenly I felt myself being pushed aside. A cold-sensation than filled my entire face as I hit the snow-covered ground. Immediately I sat myself up and looked back to where I once stood. Silently I gasped, my eyes wide at what I was witnessing.
My Mom stood in the place I was pushed from, her mouth opened as wide as mine, her eyes staring at nothing in particular. She seemed as though she wished to scream, but no sound emerged from her gaping mouth. She didn't even look like she could breath. Her eyebrows and fingers twitched in unison, the fire-bender's sword sticking out of her lower back, blood covering the blade.
Just than the solider took his sword from where it lay in my Mother's stomach, causing her to collapse onto the snow below. Violently she began to cough, blood escaped her mouth and tricked down her chin. Her attacker just smirked as he turned to leave.
Suddenly my limbs unfroze and I quickly crawled over to my severely wounded Mother. 'Mom?' I asked as I gazed upon her slowly dying figure.
'Sokka,' She spoke, her voice raspy, 'Sokka my little boy.'
'Mom I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.' Tears began to form in the corners of my eyes. 'I love you…'
'I love you too Sokka, you and Katara both…' She raised her left hand and touched my cheek. Biting back the sob enclosed in my throat, I grabbed her hand in mine.
'Mom-'
'Be strong Sokka, its okay. Its not your f…' Suddenly her hand went limp in my grasp and the life vanished from her water-colored eyes.
'Mom?' I asked timidly. 'Mom?' I repeated a little louder as if she was asleep and I was attempting to awaken her. 'Mom.' The word left my lips in a whisper, my grasp on her hand greatening as the tears poured from my closed eyes.
She was dead. She was dead. My Mom, my Mother… The woman who raised both Katara and me almost single-handedly… the only one who believed in me…the same one who was afraid she wouldn't be able to protect me…afraid of losing me…my Mom…my beautiful Mom…she was…gone.
Suddenly the strength within me vanished and I collapsed onto my Mother's still body. 'Mom…Mom…' I repeated over and over, my shoulders shaking as tears streamed from my eyes. 'Why couldn't I save you?'
'Sokka?'
I'd jerked my head up at the sound of my name and turning I saw my Gran-Gran.
'Sokka dear your hurt…oh my…what happened?' She asked, her eyes staring beyond me.
Immediately, the entire struggle replayed in my mind. I saw it all again. My battle. My mistake. Falling. Snow. My Mom, dying. The sword. The blood.
The Fire-bender…
Not a single thought ran through my head. I just bolted up and ran. Ran with energy I didn't know I had. I just ran as far as I could, as fast as I could. It wasn't in till I reached a ledge that overlooked the ocean that I stopped, my cheeks still wet with tears and my eyes full of those unshed.
"Why!' I screamed, falling to my knees, my hands clenched into fists. 'Why?' I almost whispered, banging my fist on the snow beneath me. 'Why her? Why my Mom? Why?' I continued to yell, not even trying to hold back my sobs. 'Why did you steal her away from me!' I screamed at my Mother's murderer, though he wasn't there to answer. 'Why didn't you have me die instead?…' I asked quietly, not entirely sure who I was asking.
Why wasn't I able to save her?…
The day of my Mother's death, I cried out there in till I had no more tears left in me. The day of my Mother's funeral, I just sat quietly as if her death failed to faze me. I even got a few glares from people who thought me heartless. I was far too heartbroken to speak though, too miserable to defend myself.
Gran Gran was the only one who understood. She was the only living person who saw me crying. And she would be the last. With my Mother's last breath she had told me to be strong and my Dad had once told me that crying is for the weak. So I promised myself I wouldn't cry anymore and I promised myself I'd be strong for everyone.
And that meant I was going to have to suck up all the tears and all the misery and keep it within. No matter how bad it hurts to know I couldn't save my Mom. No matter how bad it hurts to know they were right.
And it was also that night that I promised myself I'd train as hard as I could to become the greatest warrior of the south. Because I understood that if I didn't get better, the entire village, including Katara and my Gran Gran, could be killed just like my Mother.
But it was difficult. I was and still am the oldest boy of the tribe by at least nine years. So there was no one to teach me, no one to help me, and no one to spar with me.
However, with the memory of my Mother in my mind I kept training. And I guess that because of this what was once a simple desire, a belief, has become my obsession.
I really haven't improved, but I'll keep going for her…
Lying in the soft grass, staring up at the baby blue sky I sigh heavily. Katara had been talking to Aang about our parents, causing many unwanted memories to resurface in my mind. However, I acted as if I didn't care. Thus making Katara mad. She had yelled at me to leave so here I am now, thinking.
And it's just crazy to remember how everything happened…
Softly a sigh escapes my lips. I've just noticed that the colors of the sky have altered. Lavender has replaced the light blue, and the once white fluffy clouds have become a baby pink, signaling the sunset.
I'm going to have to go back to Katara and Aang now. I'm going to have to tease the two about what they might have done in my absence and pretend like nothing ever happened. I'm going to have to be strong for Katara and me again. Its time for me to go back to being a warrior.