Okay, I haven't really done this kind of thing before; so don't blame me if it's really crappy-like, okay? Thankies.
This idea just popped into my head while I was on hols with my bezzie mate and I listened to this song in the car! I had to write the idea down on my phone quickly 'cause I can't read or write in a car, so I was trying to note down these different ideas. It was sooooooooo aggravating!!!!!
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, and I never will... the only YGO thing I own is my deck!!! Also, I don't own 'Taking Over Me' by Evanescence, okay?
Warnings: Okay, no hentai-ness or anything like that (I hope...!), but there is yaoi in this, so if you are against this, please turn away and never look back. Either that or learn to deal with it and get with the picture!
Also, there are some very weird random thoughts in here, but since this is in different POVs, and with Jou's reputation, there is a bit more randomness on his part! There is a bit of swearing in here, but they are teenage lads, so what else would you expect? (They're about 17/18 in this fic, otay?)
I turn over, trying to keep my thoughts off you, once again. Ever since you left, I haven't been able to get a decent night's sleep. Then again, I left too, but that's not the point. I couldn't stand being home any longer; there were things that reminded me of you everywhere. I walk down the street and see someone using your merchandise, talking about your newest product, then seeing your large mansion or your corporation was too much for me. The gang would talk about you, and I'd be forced to act like I couldn't care less about the fact that you left everything behind. The fact that you left me behind.
You probably don't even remember any of us now. Well, except Yami, but that's only 'cause he beat you all the time and annoyed you like hell. I wonder what you're up to right now. Are you working? Are you at your new home with Mokuba? I'm at my new home too except; well, I'm alone.
I actually think I loved you, you know? Stupid, isn't it? I hated your guts, but you were an okay guy. I mean, your heart was always in the right place; it's just that you were too stubborn to open your mind to anything remotely out of the ordinary, such as old Egyptian dead guys that sometimes tried to take over your mind. Or kill you, whatever. You were determined to not believe a thing we said, but hey, that's just you.
Determined? That's actually an understatement, but you were determined to make my life hell, at first that is. You were intolerably cruel to me and almost made me kill myself (as if I hadn't had enough to deal with already at home, I had to get your shit everywhere else I went); I don't want to think about that now though. You didn't realise for a while, but after you realised just how bad I'd gotten, you actually apologised. It was, like, the smallest apology I've ever heard, but it was probably the first apology you've ever given to anyone – except perhaps Mokuba – so I guess you did okay. I forgave you, and we kinda went back to normal, but some of what you said never went away. After we went back to normal, something changed. I'd be leaving and you'd watch me go, or we'd be arguing or something, and you'd stare into my eyes as if awaiting my reaction. You'd be closer to me when we fought, you'd stare at me for a long time, or zone out in the middle of a lesson whilst gazing out the window I sat next to.
Then you went to America. You told the press you were going to 'secure your ties abroad'. Yeah. I knew that that wasn't the reason. It's the way you said it. The way that you –looked- when you said it. It was probably just something I noticed, as no one else seemed to realise, it's just that you looked uncomfortable. It was there in your eyes. You looked like there was something that was out of your control and you were running from it. I always wondered what it was.
It was only after you left that I realise how often you occurred in my life. To put it simply, I felt empty. The most prominent memories I had of you were when you teased me, and all the comments were derogatory. I got all depressed again, and it wasn't exactly your fault, I mean, if you'd have been nicer, then I wouldn't have gotten miserable, but if you'd have been nicer you wouldn't have been you and... whatever. Well anyways, as I said before, everything reminded me of you and that gap inside me kept growing until it was a large gaping ravine that made me feel constantly sick. So, I moved. I left everything I knew and began a completely new life. I had money left over from my wages at the restaurant and I packed everything up that I wanted and left on the bike that everyone pitched in and got me for my birthday. It was beautiful when I first got it, and now it's mesmerising, suiting my current moods perfectly. It's black with speckles of silver, just like the sky at midnight when it's flickered with stars. Anyway, I left, used a different name wherever I went and found an adequate apartment with a nice landlord. I think he fancies me or something, 'cause he always gets this strange look on his face when he sees me, and he smiles freakishly. It really bothers me.
A while back, the fact that I'm alone would have bothered me, but now, well, I don't care. I work, I eat from time to time, and I pray for the people that I knew. I have a sort of shrine in the corner of my bedroom with the pictures of all the people I used to know, ranging from Serenity to Marik (now that he's not evil, he's an okay guy), and I pray for each of them every day. I miss them all, and not having anyone here kinda makes me miss them more, I guess. As they say, absence makes the heart grow fonder.
I roll back over and close my eyes, forcing sheep into my mind and imagining then jumping over a fence. But, yet again, you appear again. No matter what I do, you always enter my thoughts and dreams. The sheep's heads are replaced by yours, and suddenly there are leaping Seto Sheep trying their hardest to jump the high fence. Heh, I laughed at that. Determination's one of your best qualities.You don't remember me,
But I remember you,
I lie awake and try so hard
Not to think of you
But who can decide what they dream?
And dream I do...
Seto POVAnother paper signed, another product testing approved. Our newest duel disk is perfect. The last one was superb, but during Battle City, I saw many glitches in the disk and have made updating and fixing it my sole priority. Literally. I've been in the office for hours now, and have many hours left to go. I will not leave until the new disk is completed. Mokuba has been forcing my secretary to make me go for lunch everyday, but she's too scared of me to actually make it look like real concern. She looks like she's being held at gun point each time, and knowing Mokuba, he wouldn't hesitate to go that far to convince me people care about me. Hmph. Like I care.
I wonder whom they'll use to test my new disks. I should go down there and test them myself. They need a good, strong duellist with a powerful deck to test them out, but apparently, my tournament showed me that it was obviously not powerful enough. I'll go test them myself anyway. It's the best choice, and I know what I'm doing, unlike those pathetic excuses for duellists they usually use to test out my goods. Huh, amateurs. I used to call the mutt that. Back when we were all in Domino. Then, I left.
I had to get out of there. Just for a bit. It was to overpowering. First of all, all I needed was to tease him every once in a while. Be it about his duelling skills and numerous defeats at my hands or about how he pathetically relied on his 'friends' to get him out of everything. I needed it. It was one of the constant things in my life. We ignored each other as much as possible in and out of school, but when we did clash, it was never violent. He sometimes balled up his fists and challenged me, but I left and never let it go further than that.
After a while, it wasn't enough. I'd go out of my way to argue with him more often, get him riled up so that I could see that fire burn in his amber eyes. It was so invigorating to see him get angry, so the comments got harsher, crueller, and more personal. I'd attack his financial status, tell him how poor he was in comparison to me and tell him how, ultimately, to the world, he was a worthless creature that could be spared. The shock, contemplation, and finally, acceptance that appeared in his eyes every time I'd say that thing and the like to him spurred me on, but also touched a nerve inside me, and made me feel something towards him I'd never felt towards anyone before. Pity. I truly pitied him. He tried so hard at everything, and all I did was knock him down. Thinking back on it, he never actually did anything to me, just challenge me every now and then. I started to relent on the teasing, and Yami and the Goodie Gang decided that I'd actually listened to their complaints about my treatment of their friend and tried making friends with me. I made it perfectly clear that I did not want their friendship, and used some excuse as to why I had stopped teasing Wheeler so much. I can't remember what I said, but it must have been something quite bad, as they all went into shock and stopped attempting to talk to me for quite a while.
In the mean time, they tried to cheer Wheeler up, but it was perfectly obvious to all and sundry that he did not want their help. He seemed to be shrouded in a constant shadow and never talked to anyone unless it was necessary. People started to get worried, and the teachers even started to shoot concerned glances at the class joker who had suddenly turned mute. He did his work and handed it in on time, and from what I heard of his friends' conversations, he never saw them after school anymore. I hated to admit it, but I had started to get a bit apprehensive myself. No one knew where he lived, and none of his friends had ever been to his house. I decided to follow him after school. Heck, Mokuba always got home before me and all work was well ahead of schedule.
I called Mokuba to let him know that I was going to be late and followed Wheeler away from school. I followed him into Domino Park and we went into the forest area. He twisted and turned away from the path and I finally lost him after a couple of turns and heard a voice in the glistening trees above me. He asked me what I was doing following him, and I said that the teachers weren't teaching their lessons properly for worrying about him and that he was ruining mine and many others' educations. He retorted, and we carried on in the same way for a while, nostalgia creeping back at us. He came down from the trees, and for the first time I managed to get a long look at him. To be blunt, he looked like crap. He obviously hadn't slept in a long time, and he was stick thin, so he hadn't eaten either, and he was as pale as vampire. Put it this way: he was ill. Again, he made me feel something else for him. Guilt. Guilt over the fact that I had done this to him. Then, I went totally out of character. It must have been this new emotion that spurred me to do it, but I actually apologised. He was shocked, but smiled and thanked me, saying he always new I was a nice guy. That was what threw me off. The next thing I knew was that he had disappeared and that I was calling for a lift.
Slowly, the air of depression lifted from him, but it still lingered slightly, reminding me of what I'd done. I continued to tease him, he reciprocated, and everyone brushed the incident off as 'just a phase'. Well, not everyone. They were curious about what had changed Jou back so suddenly, but he never told them and always managed to discreetly change the subject.
Eventually, I became obsessed with talking to him. I'd find out when he'd be at certain places, and make sure I was 'casually passing by' so that we'd meet. He was so intoxicating. He had an aura of mischief, but also of a deeper sadness or... something...else. It was amazing. He'd suddenly change from friendly to hostile at the slightest mention of me. He knew who his enemies were, but he'd give them a chance first. Me, well, I received too many chances and failed too many times for him to think any different of me. Or so I thought. I sometimes found him looking at me strangely – with something strange in his eyes, and then I'd go home and find Mokuba asking me why I was staring lovingly at random household objects for long periods of time.
I soon realised that I was obsessed with him and decided that I had to leave. I'd wake up with the urge to smell his hair, stare at him for ages on end and stay alone with him for the whole day just, staring. It was infuriating. I consulted Mokuba about my situation, and he agreed to move to New York for a while so that I could clear my head and so that we could set straight affairs in America.
I scratch my head and open the bottom drawer of my desk. Inside, there are newspaper clippings from Duellists Kingdom and Battle City and a large pile of papers held together with a large rubber band. I clear my desk and place the pile on my desk. Relations, details, history, known addresses, background checks on everyone he knew are all here. I went back for a while a few months after leaving for America and found everyone to be doing fine at school, normal lives, the usual; but with one exception. They weren't happy. Why? Jou wasn't there. He had left about a month after Mokuba and I, and no one knew where he went. I'd found out where he lived by hacking government files and I sent some of my staff there to check it out, whilst his friends didn't even have any idea of where he lived. What they found was amazing. It was appalling. He took everything he had wanted and left the rest behind. Diaries describing his family life were left behind. They were awe-inspiring. He'd been through worse than I had, yet he's managed not to become a bitter, cold person.
I have to find him. I had to find out how he did it. I need to find him. I need him. I believe in you
I'll give up everything just to find you
I have to be with you to live, to breathe
You're taking over me.
Ok, end of chapter 1, let me know if you love it or hate it, then I'll scrap this or continue, ok? Thanks!