Author's note: Faramir is a creation of my Padawan and me and is not to be stolen. Obviously, we have borrowed his name from Professor Tolkien's works.
******
In the Morning
We sit here in the dark. You are leaning against my shoulder; you fell asleep a couple of hours ago. I have not let sleep claim me yet. I sit here watching the night sky; a few stars still streak through the heavens. You enjoyed watching the meteor shower so much, but once it passed its peak, you just could not keep your eyes open any longer.
It was good to have this little vacation; even Jedi need to relax. The half moon is rising over the sea, its light playing off the waves and dancing along with the ocean currents. I see you in its faint light, gleaming off your hair and along your round cheeks. The sea, reaching to infinity beyond the sky and disappearing down the beach on either side, slaps gently along the shoreline, creating a soothing noise. I blink to keep back the slumber it draws me toward.
Dawn is only an hour or so away. Though I am tired, I have enough strength to lift you into my arms. As I head to the house, I hear a noise and turn to see Faramir standing. I had almost forgotten he had come to watch the sky show with us. "Come on, boy," I call and he trots along behind me to the porch.
I remember the day you brought him home. Master Yoda says you learned such behavior from me; I think you had it in you always. Either way, I am sure you did a good thing. That little pup has become very important to both of us.
I sit upon the porch swing; I am not yet ready to go inside when the beautiful stars are yet unhidden. I settle you between my legs; you are too big now to sit in my lap and still rest comfortably against my shoulder, which is where I rest your sleep-laden head. Faramir scampers up and climbs into your lap, nestling his nose under your hand and resting his head there. It looks as if you have fallen asleep petting him.
I smile, knowing I am so lucky to have you both. Lucky and undeserving is how I feel of having two such precious souls in my life. You are both now asleep upon me, but I do not feel the weight as a burden. I feel it as an assurance of goodness and light, and that those are a part of my life. Without you, I would be so much less, hardly worth being at all.
The horizon is lightening. I reflect on how my own horizons were brightened by you, my Padawan, and how many times I have had to reach for you to keep from falling into darkness. You are my anchor when times are rough, and they often are. Together we are stronger. With you in my life, I feel assured of my place.
Sometimes I worry so of losing you. What would I do then? I think of all the corruption there is in the universe, but then I look at you and remember that there is so much goodness, and the best of that is here in my arms at this moment. At times like this, I think that I would die if I lost you, that I could not hold back the abyss on my own, but I know that I would go on because that is what you would want.
The sun is near rising, and its light filters over the horizon. It rouses you, though your eyelids barely lift. You mutter, "Master, I dun want to go home," then bury your face in my tunic, seeking that sanctuary of rest.
"Neither do I," I whisper, then rest my cheek on your head and rock you back to sleep.
I smile at the two of you, my boys, our little family. I must be the most fortunate being in the galaxy. I am happy just to be here with you and to listen to you breathing softly and to know you love me. That is enough to give me reason to live. Thoughts of all that is wrong and cruel creep upon my tired senses and try to tell me to let go, but just knowing that I have you keeps me sane.
I watch as the burning reds and bright pink and orange fade from the sky. Day is beginning, but not for us. I lift you once more; Faramir stirs and moves to your stomach as I carry you inside.
The shades are drawn and I place you into the oversized bed, slipping in beside you. Faramir moves and rests on my chest. I pet him a moment, and he licks my hand before returning to you and lying above your heart, nose resting at your chin. I roll onto my side and look at you two again. I move close to you and drape an arm over your stomach; to be far from you now would be the greatest evil, or so my weary head feels. I rest my brow against your temple, feeling about ready to give into sleep.
Images begin to dance through my head; I cannot make sense of them. Some I recognize as memories, others as stray thoughts, some do not seem in the least conceivable.
I shake my head ever so slightly and try to blink away the errant visions. I decide to give up my battle, certain only that you are close, my son, and stop fighting to keep my eyes open.
Everything will make sense in the morning, I tell myself... but isn't it morning now?
******
In the Morning
We sit here in the dark. You are leaning against my shoulder; you fell asleep a couple of hours ago. I have not let sleep claim me yet. I sit here watching the night sky; a few stars still streak through the heavens. You enjoyed watching the meteor shower so much, but once it passed its peak, you just could not keep your eyes open any longer.
It was good to have this little vacation; even Jedi need to relax. The half moon is rising over the sea, its light playing off the waves and dancing along with the ocean currents. I see you in its faint light, gleaming off your hair and along your round cheeks. The sea, reaching to infinity beyond the sky and disappearing down the beach on either side, slaps gently along the shoreline, creating a soothing noise. I blink to keep back the slumber it draws me toward.
Dawn is only an hour or so away. Though I am tired, I have enough strength to lift you into my arms. As I head to the house, I hear a noise and turn to see Faramir standing. I had almost forgotten he had come to watch the sky show with us. "Come on, boy," I call and he trots along behind me to the porch.
I remember the day you brought him home. Master Yoda says you learned such behavior from me; I think you had it in you always. Either way, I am sure you did a good thing. That little pup has become very important to both of us.
I sit upon the porch swing; I am not yet ready to go inside when the beautiful stars are yet unhidden. I settle you between my legs; you are too big now to sit in my lap and still rest comfortably against my shoulder, which is where I rest your sleep-laden head. Faramir scampers up and climbs into your lap, nestling his nose under your hand and resting his head there. It looks as if you have fallen asleep petting him.
I smile, knowing I am so lucky to have you both. Lucky and undeserving is how I feel of having two such precious souls in my life. You are both now asleep upon me, but I do not feel the weight as a burden. I feel it as an assurance of goodness and light, and that those are a part of my life. Without you, I would be so much less, hardly worth being at all.
The horizon is lightening. I reflect on how my own horizons were brightened by you, my Padawan, and how many times I have had to reach for you to keep from falling into darkness. You are my anchor when times are rough, and they often are. Together we are stronger. With you in my life, I feel assured of my place.
Sometimes I worry so of losing you. What would I do then? I think of all the corruption there is in the universe, but then I look at you and remember that there is so much goodness, and the best of that is here in my arms at this moment. At times like this, I think that I would die if I lost you, that I could not hold back the abyss on my own, but I know that I would go on because that is what you would want.
The sun is near rising, and its light filters over the horizon. It rouses you, though your eyelids barely lift. You mutter, "Master, I dun want to go home," then bury your face in my tunic, seeking that sanctuary of rest.
"Neither do I," I whisper, then rest my cheek on your head and rock you back to sleep.
I smile at the two of you, my boys, our little family. I must be the most fortunate being in the galaxy. I am happy just to be here with you and to listen to you breathing softly and to know you love me. That is enough to give me reason to live. Thoughts of all that is wrong and cruel creep upon my tired senses and try to tell me to let go, but just knowing that I have you keeps me sane.
I watch as the burning reds and bright pink and orange fade from the sky. Day is beginning, but not for us. I lift you once more; Faramir stirs and moves to your stomach as I carry you inside.
The shades are drawn and I place you into the oversized bed, slipping in beside you. Faramir moves and rests on my chest. I pet him a moment, and he licks my hand before returning to you and lying above your heart, nose resting at your chin. I roll onto my side and look at you two again. I move close to you and drape an arm over your stomach; to be far from you now would be the greatest evil, or so my weary head feels. I rest my brow against your temple, feeling about ready to give into sleep.
Images begin to dance through my head; I cannot make sense of them. Some I recognize as memories, others as stray thoughts, some do not seem in the least conceivable.
I shake my head ever so slightly and try to blink away the errant visions. I decide to give up my battle, certain only that you are close, my son, and stop fighting to keep my eyes open.
Everything will make sense in the morning, I tell myself... but isn't it morning now?