Obligatory Disclaimer: CBS/Paramount owns Star Trek: The Next Generation, and everything canon; the rest is mine. I write this stuff for love, not money.

Continuity Note: Takes place after the first chapter ("Celestial Navigation") of Crush III: Sostenuto.

Stardate 46096.16

(Wednesday, 5 February 2369, 02:23 hours, ship's time)

FROM: Lt. Cmdr. Data, U.S.S.Enterprise

TO: Cmdr. Bruce Maddox, Daystrom Institute

Dear Commander Maddox:

First, let me congratulate you on the successful creation of a working, if rudimentary, prototype of a positronic network. I have reviewed the material you sent, and am curious about your decision to keep your creation in a virtual environment, rather than constructing a 'body' of some type.

Are you concerned that doing so will lead to inevitable anthropomorphizing, and prevent you from being objective about your creation, or do you wish to prevent others from doing so? Is there perhaps a greater disconnect when dealing with an infant intelligence that does not have a 'face' into which you must look, allowing you to maintain your position of pure research, rather than feeling any paternal connection?

These are things I wish I could have asked my father, and things you have no doubt considered on some level as well. I am amenable to a subspace call if you wish further discussion, but I am unable to take leave to visit the Daystrom Institute at the present time.

Further, I believe that such a visit would be premature. When your project has achieved further development, I will gladly schedule a time to visit. If it is acceptable to you, I would ask Dr. Crusher, Lt. Commander LaForge, Lt. Barclay, and Zoe to accompany me. The former two are well-versed in my own systems, while Barclay is rapidly becoming an expert in holographic AI systems, and may have unique insight. As to Zoe, her interest in AI and cybernetics is both personal and, I believe, understandable, but despite the fact that her interests lie in vastly different directions, she, too, is often quite insightful. It is, I think, a result of having a 'creative' personality.

(=A=)

One of the things I have become better at discerning over the past two years is knowing when it is necessary to give time estimates down to the millisecond, and when it is not. Since I believe our correspondence falls into the latter category, I will apologize only for a 'significant amount of time' having elapsed since I last sent a missive to you.

By now, you have had examples of what I do in a typical day, as well as during a typical away mission, though I hope I made clear that on the Enterprise there really is no day that could be considered entirely typical, and the same holds true for missions. There is always something surprising that turns up when one least expects it.

Take, for example, my habit of attending a weekly poker game with my colleagues – my friends – here on the ship. While it was Commander Riker who initially suggested that members of the command staff meet for poker, after the first several 'poker nights' we all made a mutual decision that we would take turns hosting the evening.

Counselor Troi was the first person (aside from Commander Riker) to host the game in her quarters, providing a variety of snacks and libations for her fellow players. Recently Lt. Worf's attendance has been curtailed by the presence of his young son, Alexander, however, members of the crew, and some of our civilian personnel 'step in' from time to time to provide him a respite in the form of 'free babysitting.'

As the lieutenant has gained confidence in his own parenting skills, he has even hosted our game with Alexander present. Specifically, the boy was present to greet everyone, and then sent to his room to entertain himself with a minimum of noise. At his appointed bedtime, Lt. Worf paused the game so that he could spend a few minutes with his son, and then we resumed after 'lights out.'

Recently, however, I have learned that there is a great deal of difference between hosting poker night when one has a child who has a room of their own in which they may spend their time, and hosting it when one shares their quarters with a romantic partner who is not part of the circle of players.

Prior to Zoe moving in with me, the nights when it was my turn to host the game were generally disrupted only by the presence of my cat, Spot, and her enthusiasm for lying in the middle of the poker table, heedless of any admonishments to 'get down' or 'go to bed.' (My friends and colleagues frequently remind me that 'if I had wanted a pet that would listen to me, I should have acquired a dog.')

While my girlfriend generally has a scheduled activity of her own that runs concurrent with the officers' poker game, her activity is one that involves intense physical activity, and it is not unusual for her to be finished long before we have concluded our game. In those cases, I am unsure what the proper protocol might be: Do I end the game prematurely, so that Zoe may come home and rest? Do we merely pause the game, acknowledge her presence, and then continue? Do I request that she 'find an elsewhere to be' (to use her phrase) while we play cards? No choice seems satisfactory, and all seem somewhat unfair.

(=A=)

Commander Maddox, I know that my correspondence over the past year has included more than 'a little bit' about my relationship with Zoe. While our poker night dilemma is the most recent problem to be solved, being in an intimate partnership with a woman has taught me much about the different ways humans resolve their issues.

Zoe and I are both 'talkers,' and we share a sense of curiosity. While it was music that brought us together, and continues to be an important aspect of our life together, it is our conversations that I find the most compelling.

(It is possible that my girlfriend would be disappointed to know that I regard the time we spend talking to each other as more meaningful than sex, but many of our conversations are before, during, or after we engage in physical intimacy. Many nights have been spent holding each other in the darkness of our bedroom, simply conversing. For me, the two are now inextricably intertwined, at least where Zoe is concerned. However, this should not imply that I dislike being physically intimate with my partner. As I have expressed in previous missives, I believe our sex life is healthy, and I would not wish to discontinue that aspect of our relationship.)

I have often heard my colleagues refer to their best friends or romantic partners with the observation that they can 'talk about anything.' I believe that to be true of myself and Zoe. We do talk about anything. We also talk about everything.

It is for this reason that I am currently… concerned. We are approaching the Terran holiday known as Valentine's Day, our second as a couple. I wish to 'make it special' for Zoe, but that day is also the anniversary of the attack by the Crystalline Entity at Melona. It is the anniversary of the woman I care for being kidnapped by my brother, and subjected to both physical and sexual assault.

There is no one aboard this ship, or among my partner's closest friends or family who does not find her apparent healing remarkable, but as the day in question draws near, she is becoming withdrawn. More specifically, she is adamant about not wanting to talk about it. She has expressed only the desire to have a 'happy Valentine's Day.' I believe this behavior is a form of denial, but I am at a loss for a way to help her.

Commander Maddox, is it possible that no matter how much growth I have achieved, I am still ill-prepared to provide the woman I care for with the support she requires?

Is it possible that I am 'fooling myself' into believing that our relationship is sustainable, when I cannot give my lover the emotional responses she professes not to need, but undoubtedly deserves?

I do not expect you to provide these answers. I believe that Counselor Troi and Zoe, herself, are correct that I must find them within myself. I can only trust that when Zoe assures me she does not find me lacking, or perceive anything 'missing' from our relationship, she is speaking the truth.

Nevertheless, I wish there was a piece of code, a program or subroutine, that would enable me to protect her from the fears she is experiencing, especially as Lore has taken to sending… gifts.

Commander Geordi LaForge is my best friend, and when I discuss these concerns with him he looks at me with the pursed lips that mean he has become exasperated with me. "Data," he tells me, "You're overthinking things. Zoe is with you because she loves you and gets enough out of being with you that she wants to stay. Accept that she's getting what she thinks she needs, and don't worry about the semantics."

For a man who is generally considered 'unlucky' in love, himself, our chief engineer is quite astute.

I shall leave you, Commander Maddox, with the following attachments – an analysis of the growth in my neural net with a graph rating that growth before and after Zoe and I began our relationship, Lore's specifications, which you requested, a recording of Zoe and I playing a duet, and an image and schematic of the clockwork bird he had delivered to the ship.

I look forward to your response.

Regards,

Lt. Commander Data

U.S.S. Enterprise

Notes: Completely self-referential to almost all of the CRUSHverse. No apologies, no excuses. In my head canon, while Data and Not-so-groovy Bruce are not precisely friends, they do eventually settle into a collegial working relationship, though this does not preclude Maddox being an opportunist from time to time.

P.S. No, I'm not putting off writing chapter 2 of Crush 3 at ALL. Nope. Not me.